When I Was Your Man

"You did what?" Val's eyes were open with surprise. Matt took another sip from his coke. He looked around in Val's small living room while he debated whether or not to make a sarcastic comment. Baby stuff was shattered around everywhere. Matt knew Val usually kept her apartment straight, but the little one made it very challenging.

He got up and kneeled down on the floor, placing the toys back into the box. She'd had a long enough day, after all. He'd spare her the sarcastic comment and rather help her.

"I know, I'm a bad person," he said without even looking at her. "You're a great person, and thanks for putting those away," she retorted. Matt could feel her curious gaze burning holes into his back.

"But how come?"
Matt took a deep breath. He still didn't fully understand how it all came to be. It was as if he knew what happened and why it happened but he had yet to realize it wasn't some weird dream.

"She texted me that she wanted it. I almost kissed her in the morning and I said 'bullshit you don't want this'. And then she wrote that we should just do it for closure and all," Matt sighed as he spoke.

"That sounds so unlike her," Val remarked.
"And unlike me to go along," Matt added.
"Definitely."

Matt's knee creaked loudly as he stood up from the floor. I'm not growing younger either, he said to himself. It's time to find someone. But it's hard when all I ever wanted in all those years was her.
"And then you just did it?"

"Yeah, it was strange in the beginning," Matt said absentmindedly while recalling the details. His heart skipped a beat at the thought of her soft skin and her sweet taste.
"I can imagine. I don't know if it was the best idea in the first place," Val said with a confused look on her face, “but now it’s done and we all know we can’t turn back time. How does it make you feel now?“

Matt didn’t even think about her question. “Vulnerable,“ he shot, and having said that he realized it was true. He’d given her a piece of him to keep, and somehow it felt like he received nothing in return.

“I thought so. And do you think it makes her feel better?“ Matt exhaled audibly. “No. Like I said, I don’t even know why she wanted it in the first place. She… suggested it.“
“And you couldn’t refrain,“ Val answered his question with a raised eyebrow.
“Exactly, I couldn’t.“

“I'd say she still likes you. Or she likes you again. But she wouldn't do that. Never ever," Val said, and Matt shook his head. He certainly didn't need all those hopes she was placing inside his head. What he needed was a strong liquor and the courage to finally move on after all those years. He knew very well, though, that he couldn't.

“So where does this leave you and the band exactly?“ She asked, and Matt dreaded that question. “I don’t know. She said we’d do it just so the band doesn’t suffer.“
“What a stupid excuse, right?“ Val said with a laugh.

Why is she laughing now? I’m fucking miserable. “What’s so funny?“ He demanded to know.
“Well, that she made up such a stupid reason just to sleep with you, and you just don't get it,“ Val cooed, then took another sip from her wine.

“Some more?“ Matt shook his head no. He knew he still had to drive home. “You know, I could offer you the couch,“ Val said with a smile. Matt thought for a second. Did he really feel like driving home to his cold an uninhabited house? He knew only his good old friend alcohol would help. Did he really want to drink alone at home?

“You know, it would actually be great not to go home for tonight,“ he heard himself say, and with that realized he had made his decision. They nursed another bottle of wine and talked some more about Karma, and finally Matt felt like he was able to come to peace with it all.

It had been an eventful day. Val wished him a good night and Matt passed out before she even turned out the lights. He hadn’t slept well in a while. His body craved the sleep he didn’t seem to be able to get alone.

Matt was woken up by the sound of two women speaking. One was Val, that much he knew. And the other one… Karma? He opened his eyes quicker than he wanted to. The light coming in through the window was blinding him.

That’s her, he realized as he heard them speaking through the closed door. He would have loved to make out whatever it was they were saying.

Does she know I’m here? Matt’s eyes widened at the thought of what it probably looked like to Karma. Or would she know Matt would never sleep with Val? My car is parked in Val’s garage, he thought to himself, so as long as Val doesn’t open this door…

But no sooner than that, the door swung open. “Then I’ll go look for myself,“ Karma’s voice sounded, but then she got quiet. She stood in the door, not moving one inch. “Uh, so that is why you didn’t want me in here?“ Her voice was trembling.

“Karma, it’s not what it looks like…“
“I’m pretty sure you used the same line on Brian just yesterday morning,“ she said with a sarcastic grin. “Karma, if you’re thinking we… we… I wouldn’t do that to you,“ Val said, and Matt wasn’t sure if she was buying it or not.

“I… you know what? I’ll just leave you guys in here. Talk to you later, Val,“ Karma said as she turned around. “No, stay,“ the other woman ordered. “Why? So I can catch up with my good friend Matty here? I take it you know we did some of that just yesterday.“

“Because that was exactly what you came to talk to me for. And what Matt came to tell me just yesterday. And as much as I love being there for you two, there are some things you need to handle yourselves,“ Val said.

And then she left the living room.

Matt and Karma stared at each other in disbelief. The door was opened again for a brief time, and Val poked her head through it. “And tell him about Trey, Karma. It’s time for the whole truth, isn’t it? And Matt, you know what that means.“

Not the whole truth, I can't... He thought for a second, but he was distraught by a sound. A key was turned, and then Matt realized Val trapped them in. What the fuck? I can’t just start talking to her. I mean, I’ll only say something stupid like I love you or some shit.

“Val, that’s not the way to go,“ Karma’s voice sounded from behind him, and as much as he wanted to disagree she was right. “Yeah, please open up. We’re fine, really.“
Karma faced him and flashed a grin. “Yeah, she’s so stubborn. She’s definitely not gonna open that door until we do what she told us.“ Matt nodded.

“So uh, did you guys… No right?“ Karma asked, and Matt rolled his eyes. “Are we back to you thinking I’d practically do anything douche-baggy?“ She laughed stiffly. “No, just… It looked like it.“

“No, we didn’t.“
“Okay.“

Silence engulfed them for a while. “So why did you come to Val’s then?“ She asked then. “Well, for the same reason you did, I guess. I came to talk.“ Matt’s fingers were trembling. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to have this conversation, but they were having it anyway.

“Yeah, so how does this all make you feel?“

Notes

Another update for you guys! Seems like I'm spoiling you these days haha.

Buttt it has a reason: I'll be away until Monday, or Thursday at the latest. Have a nice weekend :)