Brian’s POV

“Do you know how embarrassing it was to sit there? Not to mention the hefty bill that I had to pocket on my lousy bartenders salary.” Oh seriously? The hefty bill... And I had to pay for her all the fucking time, didn’t I? She could fucking spend my money, but when it came to paying for herself, I was the asshole who stood her up. Not saying I wasn’t, but I had a really fucking good explanation for that.

„MJ—„ I started, but she cut me off.

„No,” She shook her head and even tho I was pissed beyond limits, I could see how badly I had hurt her. “I guess you only care for me when it’s convenient for you, right? God, I was so stupid to think that you would actually care about me. I was wrong, I know it now. Well, guess what, I’m done playing this game. It hurts too much!”

“MJ, wait!” She was practically out of the door, when I reached out for her and pulled her back. „What the hell do you mean I don’t care for you? So I didn’t show up, I’m fucking sorry, okay?”

„Sorry? Fucking sorry, Brian?!” She screamed in my face and tried to get out of my reach, but I was not gonna give up so easily. „You’re honestly sorry for not showing up or you’re sorry for me catching you with Dice?” MJ pointed to Dice, who looked almost too confused to realize what was going on.

„What the hell are you talking about?” I frowned. Did she honestly think there was something between Dice and me? Her fucking best friend and... me?

„Okay, I think I’ll go to the hotel,” Dice stood up and quickly walked up to the door.

„No, Dice, don’t—„ I was cut off by the closing door.

„See? You’re even ready to go fucking after her instead of explaining yourself to me!” She raged and I was forced to close my eyes and take a deep breath just to control myself and don’t raise my hand to MJ.

„I fucking would if only you’d let me!” I dropped my hands from hers and stepped back, brushing my fingers through my hair.

„Okay, I’m listening, please, tell me how you didn’t just fuck my best friend,” Okay? Had Dice and MJ switched places out of a sudden? Since when did MJ have an actual backbone?

„Just listen to yourself, how can you talk like this about your friend?” I frowned. Not even I—okay, lying, I would be ready to kill Vengeance if he’d hook up with MJ. And that was a stone cold fact.

„’Cause she’s a slut! Everyone know’s that!” MJ yelled out, „She’s probably fucked most of the regulars!”

That left me with raised eyebrows. As far as I knew she had slept only with three of the regulars. One of them being me, second – Matt and the third some guy anyone could eat up, at least judging by Dice’s words. „Look, she and Matt broke up. I found her fucking crying outside the studio, what do you expect I should’ve done? Kick her in the ass and say – man up?!”

Sure I saw a couple of tears rolling down her cheeks, but I just couldn’t stop yelling. A small smirk pulled at her lips, „That’s a fucking great lie, Brian.”

„That’s not a fucking lie!” I raged. What did I have to do for her to believe me? „Come on, MJ, why would I want to fuck Dice? Does it seem like I want to get killed?” And Matt had made it very clear about that.

„You hurt me, Brian...” She now whispered, letting those waterworks fall free. „You have no idea how much...”

I sighed, walking closer to her and pulling in a tight embrace. „I know, I never meant to tho...” I whispered against her hair. That was the truth, I didn’t mean to be such a dick, but it turned out I can’t fucking control it. „Please, please forgive me...”

She didn’t reply for a while, but in the end she pulled away, wiping the tears from her cheeks. „I don’t know if I can...” She said, walking for the door.

„MJ, please...” By then I was on my knees, realizing she was really slipping through my fingers just like that. „I’m on my fucking knees, I’ll fucking change, I promise, just... just please don’t leave me...”

"Why should I believe that?"

"'Cause... 'cause I love you..."


Dice’s POV

Since the official break up with the one and only Mathew Sanders and the unholy night which I spent with Brian, just talking out the possibilities that were left for me and how to live from then on, a one whole week had passed.

Did I feel sorry for what I said to Matt? Of course I did, but it was the right thing to do. I was gonna take him down with me to the depths of hell if he remained by my side, and sorry to say, but the invitation to the devil’s lair was not a plus one kind. It was a one way ticket and I liked to travel fast. Matt on the other hand... He was too kind to wind up walking the corridors of hell with the likes of me. It felt like the right thing to do. He’ll move on, but I couldn’t say the same for myself. I realize the price of something only when I loose it. Just like my Mustang.

Did I break up with it too? You could say that. I talked Brian in to selling it, since I wasn’t in the shape to really see the beasty go. During that week I had practically ripped my heart out and threw for the stray dogs to meal on. I needed money and I had nowhere to go, I had to act while I was still thinking rationally. It usually took some time for everything to sink in and that was the main reason for the waterworks kicking only the day when Brian told me I’d become richer by 150 k. That day I understood what had I done and I had no idea what I’d do without Brian, since he was the one holding my head above the water. MJ wanted nothing to do with me, since she was strongly convinced I was sleeping with Gates. Well, I wasn’t gonna contradict that theory. Why? She can think what the hell she wants about me. Brian was my salvation, but nothing more. He was just a helping hand in a hard bump along the road.

He was the one to hook me up with a place to stay. See, one of his pals was selling his house, or his mom’s house... Okay, that’s not important, what was important was now I had a home again. Had never owned a house before, if only for that short time when my parents’ house came into my property, but this time it was different. It was small, sure, one bedroom, one bathroom and a living room adjoined with the kitchen, but what else did I need? The house was a ten minute walk away from Johnny’s, so it was just right for me, since I didn’t have a car. Okay, fine, technically I did. I bought this ’69 Mustang wreckage. I guess I’ve always had a weakness for pure American muscle. It specially Mustangs. It was time to create new memories, so that was exactly what I was doing struggling with the screws from underneath the car.

I begged not to break the last screwdriver, since I didn’t have any money to buy a new one anymore. How? Well, it never did hold on to me for far too long. I’d bought a new engine for the Mustang, all the necessary tools to work on this piece of shit of a car and stocked up my mini bar, which was just a simple cupboard quite frankly. Oh and I went to a strip club the other day. What? I had to cloud the misery somehow.

The heat outside was unbearable and was that fucking oil dripping on my face? Goddammit! There was a leak in the oil tank. Jesus fucking Christ... I slid out from under the car, seeing my white tank top with black stains, the same going for my jean shorts. Why was I wearing a white top again? I walked in the open garage just to hear some popy tunes coming from the radio. „Ughh... Enough with the pussycatblows...” I went up to the radio and changed the station to something heavier. Something like Def Leppard. „That’s more like it,” A satisfied smile took over my face as I took a rag of some kind to clean my face off.

It was only then that I noticed a black Audi stop by the house. My heart skipped a beat as I saw the handsome man step out of the car, wearing an Iron Maiden shirt with a plaid button down shirt with no sleeves over it, showing off those muscled arms and making me stop to stare while I was trying not to die inwardly. His eyes were covered with aviators and when he walked around the car only to stop by the trunk, I swallowed thickly. I swear the sun was falling over him in a way that made him look almost angelic.

Fuck... I looked down on my dirty clothes and the major bruise that was sticking out from the bootleg and realized he did the right choice by breaking up with me, since I was no good for a guy like Matt Sanders. Tho it did hurt. Like hell, but I had to suck it, since that had been my prerogative.

„You left these behind,” He stated simply, bringing a brown cardboard box of my dolls. And I thought where they had gone.

„You didn’t have to bother,” I replied quietly, pushing the rug in the back pocket of my shorts and taking the box from him, „You could’ve just dropped them by Gates’.”

„Nah, besides I was in the neighborhood either way,” He said, taking his aviators off as I brought the box in the garage. „Don’t tell me you crashed it again,”

„Crashed what?” I looked back at him only to see his eyes on the car. That would’ve been nice if only I had crashed the car, but the truth was far more worse. „Oh... No, I... sold it.”

„You sold your car?” He frowned once his head jerked towards me. How else did he think I could afford this place? I shrugged and he turned back to inspect the graveyard on wheels. „And you figured to buy another Mustang... the same year, the same color,”

„What else should’ve I bought? A Honda? Like that’s ever happening,” I scoffed, my eyes landing on two guys in business suites coming straight for my driveway.

„Are you Lucy Reed?” One of them asked. That really depended on if they were here to kill me. The expensive suits, the polished shoes... Either they were really here to kill me or I’d done something extremely illegal.

„Depends on who’s asking,”

„FBI...” They showed their badges. FBI? So much for leading a low key life. What had I done now? Was it about the taxes I was avoiding to pay? No. Life didn’t come that easy. „Do you know this man?” One of them passed me a photo. I frowned. That was Jay. The one who I oh-so heavily was avoiding. And ignoring. Was he in trouble?

„If I wouldn’t, would you be here?” I questioned, not amused of where this all’s going. I gave the photo back to them, shooting a side glance at Matt, who seemed very unsure of what to make out of it or if he was actually allowed to move on his free will. Breathe, pal.

„Good point.” The one who went by the name of Smith said, „When was the last time you saw him?”

„I don’t know, a week ago?” At the party of full blown chaos. If you asked me, they should be investigating the frat gathering and if the hosts’ parents hadn’t killed him yet, instead of wherever they were getting with this.

„And where did you see him?”

„Before I answer any further, should I get a lawyer? Are you accusing me of anything?” Somehow my life seemed to build up to fall under the category of a cliche detective novel. I suppose that’s what you get for putting the bad guys behind bars. I had underestimated their reinforcements and from what I get out of this lovely visit from the country guard dogs, I was in for a big surprise and a lot of bangs. Not that I didn’t love fireworks.

„No, but I think it would be wise for us to have this conversation inside.” They both looked at Matt, who looked just as confused as I felt.

„No worries, I’m going.” He finally said and headed for his car.

„Shall we?” I sighed, pointing to the front door of the house. They nodded and we all walked in, guard dog Smith and the other poodle – Lopez taking places on my freshly bought leather couch. „Miss Reed, we’re strongly convinced you’re in great danger.”

„Excuse me?” And who was I endangered by? Jay? Don’t make me laugh. No, seriously, don’t. I don’t know how to anymore.

„Jay Knoxville is suffering from a very strong mental disorder which involves anger issues.” Poodle Lopez explained. I’ll say again - excuse me? Was there anyone who wasn’t a violent sick bastard in that family? That left me gaping at them. „A lawyer who refused to take on his father’s case had been taken to the hospital three days ago and Jay Knoxville himself has been reported missing since then.”

„And what does that have to do with me?” Other than he was after me? I started thinking Knoxville really stood for blood thirsty motherfuckers without any drop of conscience.

„Well you did put both his father and brother behind bars.”

„We’re assuming he’s looking for you.” All this because I stuck my nose where it didn’t belong. Yeah... Seemed about right.

„Great,” I glared at no one in particular, „So what do you suggest I do?”

„Are you living by yourself?”

„And what does it look like?” I scoffed, gesturing around.

„Do you have anyone to stay with while we take care of this mess? Any family member? Parents perhaps,”

„They’re dead.” I stated with a straight face.

„Well, then any friends?”

They had to be kidding me. Did I have—of course not! MJ wasn’t talking to me and since I was strongly convinced she was still living with Gates, I couldn’t stay with him, nor I could go back and plea on Matt’s heartstrings for him to be my grand savior. „No...” I finally sighed, „But don’t worry about me, I’m a big girl and can take care of myself.”

They shared a look between each other. What? I could! „Look, just don’t be the hero. If anything happens, or you just as much think is about to happen, call the police, or us. Here’s our numbers,” Each of them slipped their cards on the coffee table.

„Yea, sure.” I picked up one of the cards, gesturing I’ll keep it close to my heart, when in all honesty they’ll probably end along with the empty beer bottles. In the trash. „Now do you mind, I have to get ready for work.”

„Certainly. Just, please, call us if something happens or you have a lead of where he is.” Smith told as I guided them to the door.

I pulled on my best make believe smile and nodded, „Of course.”

My face dropped as soon as I closed the door behind them. Was I scared? Afraid of Jay revenging his family? Please. I had grown up between rats and wasn’t afraid to fight back if I had to. I threw the card across the room as I walked over to the bathroom to take a shower.

I let the cool water run down my face as I tilted my head back, my hands resting on the back of my neck. My eyes closed as I leaned against the tile wall. „Fuck...” I whispered. I didn’t like how the show thrived. As suspicious as it had been at the beginning, I ignored the signs and just hit the gas pedal. I shook my head, getting on with my shower routine and in a half an hour I was already out of the house and heading towards the bar.

I wasn’t the one to open tonight, it was MJ who had to be the first one there, but I couldn’t just sit home and slowly drown myself in thoughts of what if.

When I pulled up to the bar, the doors were still locked. Well this was a first, when I actually showed up before anyone else. I unlocked the door and went in, the scent of the variety of liquors hitting my nose. This place really felt like home. It was a nice change to see the place quiet and empty if only for the air conditioner breaking the silence in half.

I threw the keys back in the pocket of my leather jacket and let my cowgal’ boots carry me over to the bar to see a few different kind of whiskey dockets scattered over the counter top. This smelt like a lot of accounting I’ll have to take care of. I sighed right as the door opened and MJ walked in with a deep frown. Probably thinking why she didn’t need to use her magic key.

My eyes lowered back over the paperwork as I took a pen and everything needed to record the received goods and went to sit by one of the tables, MJ passing me without as much as a greet.

After a couple of minutes of me filling the isles, MJ spoke, „I didn’t see your car.”

„I walked,” I frowned seeing the numbers don’t add between the price of one item and the sum of those twenty five incoming Jimmy’s. I pulled out the iPhone from my pocket and opened the calculator app, the pen lingering between my lips. Those fucking sons of bitches... they should fucking learn their math.

„Hollywood whore, passed out on the floor, I’m sorry but the party’s over,” The phone took off in the middle of my accounting, blasting through the whole bar. Brian. I sighed.

„Dude, you just messed up my numbers. This better be good...”

„Where are you?” He asked and was that Matt I heard in the background? My heart just sunk to the pit of my stomach.

„Johnny’s.”

„Cool. We just finished the majority of the recording for the album, so we’re going to celebrate. Stock up the shelves.” And with that he hung up, leaving me blinking at my phone.

„Great...”

Notes