My hands were aching from spending the last hours trying to clean the blood stains from Jess’ bedroom floor. I couldn’t stay on the hospital, her mom chose to stay even when Jess wasn’t talking to any of her parents. She still needed time to heal her wounds. Her soul wounds mostly.

When Zack brought me home by 4 am, I didn’t have a single drop of sleep on me. That house haunted me now. All Jess’ demons and mine united in one place, I could see them all around me, watching every step I made, just waiting for me to slip again. If I didn’t spend at least that night there, I wouldn’t have anywhere else to go. So if sleep wasn’t an option, clean should be a good one.

I thought about calling Brian hundred times as I mopped the floor. It was so hard to step inside her room and remember how I found her again. I thought I wouldn’t be able to get in so I almost called him. But no, I had to start being strong by myself, I had to do this alone. Brian wouldn’t be here every time to save me, and that’s something I have to get used to. He had his own problems, his own life. I needed to stop getting in his way.

I ended up falling asleep from exhaustion on the couch after I finished cleaning and only woke up when my doorbell rang. I looked at my phone, it was 9 am. Who could it be?

I fixed my clothes and my hair as I could and paced to the door, opening it slightly.

“What are you doing here? It’s early...” I squinted my eyes from the sunlight annoying my irises.

“It’s 9 am, you need to take your pill.” Brian showed me the bottle and I nodded. I completely forgot I had time to take those.

“Oh... yeah, come on in. I’ll make some coffee.” Damn it, did I just invite him in? It was kind of automatic but I instantly remembered I needed to stay away from him. I needed and I wanted to. But I couldn’t just throw him away now, he brought my pills here, I should thank him somehow.

I opened the door and he stepped inside, coming after me to the kitchen, passing through the destroyed piano on the living room.

“Wow... she did this?” he asked while we walked but I didn’t stop in front of the pieces of wood and black and white keys spread over the floor. I hated to look at it.

“Yeah... she was bad, Bri.”

“Zack told me everything, he’s still pretty shocked too. How are you holding up?” he picked up a chair and sat down as I set the water to boil.

“Trying not to think about it, I guess.” I shrugged, gazing at him.

He was looking pitiful at me so before it could get more awkward, I turned my back, got a glass of water for me and asked for my pill.

“How are the symptoms? Are you still feeling ill?” I sat in front of him and placed my hand on the table. He looked pretty worried with me.

“No, not really I just... spent the night cleaning... Jess’ bedroom and... only slept a few hours so... I might be a bit slow today.” I tried to smile but it didn’t come out.

Suddenly I felt his hand landing on mine, caressing my fingers with his soft ones. God, his touch... I need to resist him, I need to...
The noise from the water boiling invaded our ears and made me pull my hand out from his swiftly. Thank god...

I prepared the coffee and we stood in silence for a long time. Then I served us two cups and I sat back there to face him again.

“I have an idea... about what we should try to wake up Jimmy. I couldn’t sleep so I researched a lot about music stimulating the brain on comatose cases with the use of musictherapy and... I think that’s the key. He’s deeply connected to music like we are so... what if we play some songs for him today, you know his music taste, I know it too, we should get his favorite songs and play for him. It’s worth the try.”

Brian looked intrigued to me and I knew he had a lot of question popping out on his head now.

“You mean, we should play them for him, like playing a record or...”

“No, we need to play it live, live music can affect our brain and memories more than stereo frequencies. You get your guitar and your amps, I’ll get mine, and we...”

“Wait, how are we supposed to get inside the hospital with guitars and amps, Emily? I don’t see how...” he chuckled.

“I thought of a way... don’t worry, it’ll work.” I let out a smirk and drank my coffee. He only raised his brows. “But I need your help.”

---

Brian brought his car and we stuffed all the equipment there. But before we could go visit Jimmy, we paid a visit to Jess to check how she was doing and to know when she was getting out of that hospital room. She was sleeping but Zack was there and told us she had another fight with her parents this morning, even worse than last one, cause she had thrown them out blaming them for everything, nearly screaming at their faces they had ruined her life from the start. They were speechless and hurt, he said. When he went outside, her parents were gone and we were there.

We decided it was better not to wake her up and Zack told us he would stay through the night with her to wait for her psychiatric consult at next morning, when they would evaluate her and check if she could go home and whether she still was a danger to herself or not.

We told him to call us if he needed anything and headed off to the hospital Jimmy was staying.

“So... Brian, first we go up there and prepare the field for him. We need to be clear about what we are gonna do, if he’s listening to us, I bet he’d agree. Then we get back here and I take the stuff as you distract the head nurse. She’s about our age, she’ll definitely fall for your charm.”

“Oh, so you’re planning to use me to go unnoticed inside his room with the guitars?” he chuckled.

“Yep, you’re pretty useful in those situations. Believe me.” I smiled but quickly made it disappear. I didn’t want to show him any wrong signs now. “So... let’s do this, let’s get up there and talk to him.”

We left his car in the parking lot and walked to the reception, where we had to give our names to go up to Jimmy’s room.

“Your name, please?” the receptionist gazed at me with a bored look.

“I’m Emily Clarke and this is Brian Haner, we want to visit the patient James Sullivan. He’s at the...” I looked at Brian.

“...room 1212.” he completed my sentence and the woman typed the info on her computer. But then she frowned at the screen and looked up at me.

"Well... It says here mr. Haner is authorized to visit mr. Sullivan but... there’s one restriction about your name here, mrs. Clarke. I can’t let you go there. It’s the rules, I’m sorry.”

Brian and I traded confused glances and I shook my head. What? They were... forbidding me to... see him?

“I’m sorry but... this is probably a mistake! I’m sure he would want to see me, I was... I am his girlfriend!” at the instant I corrected myself, I felt Brian’s eyes stuck on my face. But I didn’t turn to him this time, as much as I knew it had hurt him, I had to find a way to see Jimmy.

“I’m sorry, mrs., I can’t give you a visitors card. Here’s yours mr. Haner.” She handed the card to Brian, stood up and disappeared inside a room leaving me with my jaw ajar.

“I… I can’t believe!! Is it… is it Matt? He hates me that much?” I asked him as we both moved closer to the entrance door. I wasn’t sure what to think anymore.

“I don’t think he would do that, Emily. Maybe it was his…” a few people was coming out from the elevator and I could recognize a few of them. Matt and Johnny was there with two older people. “…his family…” Brian finished his sentence and they walked closer to the door, looking at us and stopping their chat right away.

Matt and Johnny waved to us discreetly, not showing too much excitement about seeing us there.

The woman sent me and Brian a look that could’ve killed us both before leaving through the door. So did the man who followed her.

“His parents. Of course, I should’ve known better…” I groaned, brushing my hair back. Damn, they must hate me profoundly. “I didn't even know them...”

“I had to tell them everything. How couldn’t I?” Matt shrugged but didn’t show any sympathy. Well, I wouldn’t expect anything more from him anyway.

“I appreciate that, Matt. Thanks.” I raised my thumbs ironically to him and stepped out of the hospital with so much anger boiling in my veins.

Brian came right after me.

“Em, just… wait, we manage something out, c’mon!” he was able to get to me and stop in front of me, holding my arm. “Just wait.”

“No, Brian, that woman was very clear, you heard it, I can’t visit him, you can. So go ahead, I’ll take the bus.” I tried to divert from him but he was insistent.

“No, I’ll take you home at least. Your guitar is in my trunk.”

“I’ll go pick it up in your place one of these days. Or not. Don’t worry, the bus stop is just across the street.”

“Emily!” he finally stopped and I kept walking without looking back.

“Goodbye Brian!”

---

Next morning I had to wake up pretty early to meet Jess’ friends at the airport. It would be a wonderful surprise to Jess, she really needed their support now cause I probably wasn’t the best person to give advice about life and mistakes. She needed more positive persons around her now. And they also had some good news, as I heard.

I waited a few minutes on the gate they told me and I saw them coming towards me. I thought it would be her three friends, but only two was there.

“Hey!!t’s good to see you girls again!” I hugged Kim and then Mei. They wore sad smiles on their faces for obvious reasons. I kept them posted about Jess.

“Yeah, nice to see you too, Emily. I’m glad you’re good now.” Kim commented as they took their bags and we walked towards a cab outside.

“What you mean?” did… Jess discuss my problems with them behind my back?

“When we left last time, you… had that car accident, right?” Kim answered and I saw Mei elbowing her friend with a raised eyebrow discreetly. I could only sigh in relief.

“Oh, yeah, yeah, right. That.” I rolled my eyes with a stupid smile, we walked inside the cab and I told the driver the directions.

“So… Mei, you told me you had news…”

“Oh yeah, Kim and I… of course we came here to see Jess, we were pretty shaken up when you told us what happened, we still are. But this time, we are not just coming here to see her…” Mei looked at Kim for a moment and then went back to face me. “We are… moving to California for good.”

“Oh wow, that’s some really big news. Jess’ gonna love to hear that!” my smile grew bigger. They are really important to Jess.

“We didn’t decide that like yesterday, you know. In fact, we were planning that since we left here a few months ago. We are arranging everything since that time, our jobs and visas.” Kim completed. Then I thought something was really weird, I had to ask.

“Oh I see and… aren’t you married, Mei? When’s your husband coming?”

“Well…” she assured herself with Kim first and then completed her sentence. “He’s not coming.” Then she raised her right hand to my sight, no ring in there anymore.

“Ohh… I’m sorry to hear that.” I regretted I asked it.

“It wasn’t… working anymore, you know? It was for the best.” She tried to show a grin and I nodded. I noticed Kim tapping her thigh friendly.

“And how’s Jimmy doing?” Kim changed the subject quickly.

“I don’t really know. His parents forbid me to see him at the hospital.” The girls opened her eyes wide and I pursed my lips. “Well, I can’t really blame them. But that’s a subject for another time. Now we gotta worry about Jess’ reception at Zack’s house. He gave me his key and he told me to bring her stuff there so we could make a surprise party for her, nothing big of course, just us. What you think?”

They traded glances and smiled to me. “We are the best on throwing parties. We’re definitely in!”

I chuckled at Kim’s remark and after a few streets, we arrived at my place. I made a bag with the stuff she would need and we headed to Zack’s, to prepare his place for her arrival. I could already say I had found two great friends on those girls either.

Notes

not so big chapter and... not so much time to write lately =p

hmmm so... new girls coming to toowwnn, what u think about that?? Did you like it? xD

<3