The Music We Make

I laid there on the couch in my pajamas, mindlessly eating a bag of Cheetos while I binged on some TV show I didn’t even care about. I tried not to think about how this would be the new norm for me and that I needed a new hobby and I cleared my mind, just letting myself relax. That was until my phone rang.

It was Matt, surprisingly. At first I wasn’t sure if I wanted to answer, but I did anyways, not able to resist. I turned down the TV and said hello, immediately taken aback by the loud music on the other end of the phone.

“ROSIE!” Matt yelled into the phone.

“Yes?”

“Why the FUCK aren’t you here right now?” he asked. He was clearly drunk.

“You know why, Matt,” was all I said.

“Fuck that. You’re my friend. You’re all of our friends. Come, now!”

“Not happening, Matt.”

The phone sounded like it was being passed to someone else, and as it was I heard someone screaming my name in the background. Eventually Val was given the phone.

“Sorry about the boys,” she said. “They’re tipsy, but they mean it when they say they want you here. Can you hear them?”

I heard a few guys chanting my name in the background and I couldn’t help but laugh. “Yes, I hear them.”

“I know what happened between you and Brian is shitty, but we all still love you and want to hang out with you. He knows that too and is okay with it, trust me,” she said to me.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes! Please come. I would be so sad if I didn’t get to see you again before the tour!”

“That’s true. Okay, I’ll be there in a little while,” I said, against my better judgement.

“SHE SAID YES!” Val yelled to everyone and they all cheered, making me smile. I just knew there was one man in that group that wasn’t cheering for me to be there at all.

I got up from the couch to get dressed, knowing that I needed to go all out tonight. I went to my room and started digging through my closet, looking for the sexiest outfit that I could find. I ended up with a little black dress that hugged my body. It had leather panels that diagonally striped down the dress, extenuating the little amount of curves that I had. I paired it with black heels, knowing I wouldn’t keep on my shoes anyways, and fixed up my hair and makeup. Looking at myself in the mirror, I couldn’t believe how good I looked. This is how I wanted Brian to remember me if this was the last time I saw him.

I packed a bathing suit and an overnight bag just in case and headed out, of course putting on my leather jacket first. I took my time getting to the party, nervous as ever. I didn’t want any drama tonight and just wanted to have fun with my friends. I knew it would be a rager and I was prepared to let go and have fun, but I was still worried some shit would go down with Brian. Part of me wanted to clear the air, but another part of me just wanted to say FUCK YOU. I knew I wouldn’t do that, but still.

When I arrived I let myself in, placing my stuff on the landing of the staircase near the door. Everyone was out back at the pool so I kicked off my heels and headed back there, grabbing a drink from the kitchen on my way. Jimmy spotted me right away and ran over to me, lifting me into the air and spinning me around.

“ROSIE!!!” he screamed. I heard Andi, Zack, Jimmy, and Matt all cheer. They all ran over to me, embracing me in a group hug.

“I love you guys,” I said in between hugs, tears beading at the corner of my eyes.

“We love you too, Rosie,” Val said as she hugged me and all the guys cheered.

“I’m so glad you came!” Andi said, grabbing my hand. She pulled me to the side and hugged me tight, whispering into my ear, “You look so hot right now. Brian was already staring.”

“This is how he will remember me,” I said, breaking from her embracing and twirling around. She laughed and I bit my lip, sneaking a glance to the man staring at me from across the yard.

Brian was still in all black but looked a little better now, his hair combed in his normal messy spikes and no longer adorning sunglasses. He was talking with some girl I didn’t know, but looking at me. His mouth was open a bit and I saw him swallow, clearly impressed by my appearance. The red head by his side touched his arm, trying to get his attention and he jumped a bit, turning back to her. I frowned, knowing that I had to get used to the idea of him being around other women, but I definitely didn’t like it.

I took a deep breath and returned to my friends, determined to have fun regardless of Brian. I hung out with Jimmy a lot of the night, playing beer pong and other drinking games. I danced with the girls, drank way too much, and spent as much time with everyone as I could,
cherishing these moments before they left.

As the night grew chilly and people started heading home, we took the party inside. It was a smaller group of us now, but we still had a good time, dancing to old songs in the living room and sharing old memories. I was dancing with Val, Jason Berry, his brother Matt, and Andi. Matt was acting like an idiot as he danced with us, but Jason was being a little more serious, putting his hands around my waist as we swayed to the music. In my tipsy state I didn’t mind the attention and allowed it, moving my hips in motion with his.

Within moments I felt my hand get tugged away from the group and I was pulled into the hall way.

“What the fuck are you doing?”

“Jesus, Brian,” I said, pulling my hand away and leaning my body against the wall. “I’m doing whatever the fuck I want.”

“Fuck, Rosie,” he said, leaning against the other wall. “You can’t just show up here and dance like that with some other guys and not expect me to get mad.”

“You broke up with me, so yeah, I can,” I said in anger.

He stepped closer to me, putting his hands on either side of me on the wall. “You drive me crazy.”

“Ditto,” I said flatly, annoyed.

He moved even closer, our bodies almost touching. I breathed in the scent of him, wanting to remember the perfect mix of cigarettes, whiskey and cologne. His hands moved to my hips and I looked into his eyes, knowing what was coming next. And I was right- next thing I knew, his lips were crashing against mine and my hands moved to his hair, pulling him as close to me as possible.

Without hesitation he moved me to a bedroom, kissing me the whole way there. He slammed me against the wall of the bedroom, hands roaming up my legs to lift up the hem of my dress. He moved my panties to the side, rubbing his fingers against my clit and making me moan against his kisses. He moved away from my mouth, slowly going down to his knees.

Brian pushed my legs apart and slipped off my panties so he could place his tongue against my clit. My legs began to shake and I had to place my hand on his head to balance myself as he slipped his fingers in, moving them in rhythm with his tongue. I gripped at his hair, barely able to stand as I clenched around his fingers as I came.

He moved his fingers out of me, roughly grabbing my hips and shoving me onto the bed. He was pissed off and it was so hot the way he threw me onto all fours, lifting up my dress again. Within moments he was inside of me, gripping tightly at my hips as he pushed into me. I cried out in pleasure and pain as Brian pushed me down into the bed, thrusting into me deeper and deeper.

“Touch yourself,” he demanded, slapping my ass.

I did as I was told, reaching under my legs to touch myself. As soon as I started rubbing my own clit I felt myself coming close to climax and I moaned Brian’s name, not even caring if anyone heard. He pulled my hair as I came, roughly pushing himself into me as my whole body shook.

I fell onto the bed, no longer able to hold myself up from the overwhelming sensations. Brian didn’t care, though; he flipped me over onto my back and pulled me closer to him so that my legs dangled over the edge of the bed. He grabbed my legs and wrapped them around his shoulders, pushing himself into me again. I couldn’t stop moaning as he fucked me hard, my mind and body trapped in a euphoric state. Brian gripped my thighs as he came, practically leaving bruises on them as he came.

After a moment to catch his breath he pulled out of me, grabbing a tissue at the edge of the bed to clean himself up. He zipped up his pants and turned to leave as I laid there, trying to catch my breath still. He stopped for a moment and turned to face me as I sat up on the bed, pulling down my dress.

“You should go,” he said coldly.

I didn’t know what to say to him other than, “Why?”

“I can’t do this,” he said softly, looking away from me. “If you’re here it just makes everything so much harder. I want you, Rosie. Like I told you before, I need 100% or nothing. This doesn’t work.” When he said that last thing, he pointing back and forth between us and the bed.

“I know,” I said softly with a sigh. “I know.”

“So you should go,” he said again, walking to the door.

“Wait a second,” I said, getting up from the bed. I walked over to him and put my hand in his. He faced me then and I reached up to give him one more gentle kiss. “Good bye.”

He nodded and swallowed, not saying anything else to me before he walked out of the door. I stood there, leaning against the wall, letting the tears flow from my eyes, knowing that he was right. I needed to leave; this was too hard and too soon. I didn’t know what I was expecting.

After a moment, I calmed myself and wiped my face, trying to clean up any excess makeup that ran from my eyes. I found my panties and slipped them back on and tried to fix my hair before heading back out to the party. I found Andi in the crowd and pulled her away from the group to the foyer of the house.

“I’m going,” I told her once we got there.

“Are you OK? Where did you go?” she asked.

“Brian,” I started. I took a deep breath to stop myself from crying immediately. “We had sex.”

“Oh, Rosie,” she began to say, but I cut her off.

“I know, it was stupid. I mean, it was amazing sex, but it was not a smart choice. I just couldn’t resist him. It was stupid for me to come here,” I said, tears starting to roll down my cheeks again.

“I don’t blame you,” she said, pulling me into a hug. “And we’re all glad you came. I’m sorry it ended up like this.”

“I knew something was bound to happen,” I said with a sigh as I wiped away my tears. “Tell everyone I said goodbye and that I love them. Could you do that for me?”

“Of course. Are you safe to drive?”

“Yes, that whole thing definitely sobered me up, don’t worry.”

“Text me when you get home. Love you,” she said, hugging me tightly again.

“Love you. Bye,” I told her as I put on my shoes. I grabbed my bag and walked out the door, heading back to my life alone. Where I should have stayed tonight in the first place.

Notes

Sorry it's short, but I hope you enjoyed the smut ;p

Thanks for all the comments!! Keeps me going!

xoxo JJ