Secrets I Have Held In My Heart
Tough Decisions
Robyn
It wasn’t long after Brian hit me, and I told him to face reality, that he turned around and left. My face was sore, and I just knew that there was going to be a massive bruise on my face. In fact, it probably was already starting to form on my face.
I looked over at Matt, he had a bruised cheek, and a cut on his forehead. He was pissed. I could see it in his eyes. It was like a rage that I had never seen before.
“I’m sorry Matt,” I said softly, looking at the ground as I went to go and get him a band aid. I felt his hand wrap around my wrist, keeping me from going anywhere.
“Robyn, this isn’t your fault,” he told me, his tone full of anger. To be honest. It scared me.
“Yes, it is Matt, I should have just stayed with my parents, then none of this would have happened between you and Brian,” I told him.
I pulled my wrist away from him and walked to the bathroom. I stared at myself in the mirror. The left side of my face, from my lower jawbone all the way up to my eye was black and purple. I sighed softly and pulled out some cotton balls, a band aid, and some hydrogen peroxide so that I could clean Matt’s cut on his head.
I walked back out to the kitchen to see Matt looking through his fridge for any cold alcohol that wasn’t champagne. “All of the good stuff is warm,” I spoke, breaking the silence. I knew he would need a drink after what happened.
“I also brought stuff to clean the wound on your head,” I told him, holding up the supplies so that he could see what I was talking about.
He let out a sigh and closed the fridge before walking over to one of the kitchen chairs. Once he sat down I tilted his head up before I began to gently dab at the cut with a soaked cotton ball. I watched as he flinched slightly from the stinging sensation, I knew it would sting slightly, and I felt horrible for what happened.
“I’m going to move out,” I told him. He looked up at me, his hazel eyes full of hurt.
“Robyn, please don’t,” he begged me.
“Matt, I have to, I’ve overstayed my welcome, you got hurt, I fucked things up between you and Brian. It’s time that I get an apartment that’s all my own. I need to focus on my daughter and I.” I told him.
The poor guy looked like he was about to cry, and I felt bad for what I had said, but I didn’t want to damage Matt and Brian’s relationship more than what I already had.
“Please Robyn, don’t do this. Stay, stay with me. Brian will get over it, let me provide for you,” he begged me, tears threatening to fall from his face.
I felt horrible, I really did. In all the years that I had known Matt, I had never once seen him cry. Not until now.
“Please let me do this Matt,” I said, running my thumb over his cheek. “I need to do this for me, and if I don’t do it for me, I should at the very least, do it for my daughter. She doesn’t need to see what is happening between the three of us.”
This morning had started off so well. Matt and I were enjoying a nice breakfast, then bam. Brian comes along and fucks everything up.
Whenever Matt finally realized that I was not going to budge on my decision, he let out a soft sigh. Pulling me into a tight hug, I knew he was still upset with me. I honestly didn’t blame him, this was a tough decision for me. I didn’t want to leave Matt’s house, but I had to. I had to do it for Alexis and me. I had to do it to keep their friendship alive.
“Trust me Matt, this is a tough decision.” I said softly, rubbing his back as he held me in his arms.
“At least let me help you pick the place out?” he asked, his hazel eyes filled with hurt. I hesitated a moment before nodding my head. “Okay,” I said softly.
He kissed my head, and I looked up at him.
“I’m sorry for everything Matt,” I said softly.
I knew it was going to be difficult to find an apartment for rent. Especially one that allowed dogs. I wasn’t going to leave my little Storm behind.
I pulled away from Matt and walked over to the cabinet. I pulled out two shot glasses and grabbed a bottle of his whiskey.
“Let’s do some shots,” I said to him, “We need to cheer up. We can’t let him ruin the rest of our day because all we want to do is mope around and do nothing,” I poured each of us a shot. I held my glass up, clinking it with his, I quickly downed the amber liquid and poured another one.
It wasn’t long after Brian hit me, and I told him to face reality, that he turned around and left. My face was sore, and I just knew that there was going to be a massive bruise on my face. In fact, it probably was already starting to form on my face.
I looked over at Matt, he had a bruised cheek, and a cut on his forehead. He was pissed. I could see it in his eyes. It was like a rage that I had never seen before.
“I’m sorry Matt,” I said softly, looking at the ground as I went to go and get him a band aid. I felt his hand wrap around my wrist, keeping me from going anywhere.
“Robyn, this isn’t your fault,” he told me, his tone full of anger. To be honest. It scared me.
“Yes, it is Matt, I should have just stayed with my parents, then none of this would have happened between you and Brian,” I told him.
I pulled my wrist away from him and walked to the bathroom. I stared at myself in the mirror. The left side of my face, from my lower jawbone all the way up to my eye was black and purple. I sighed softly and pulled out some cotton balls, a band aid, and some hydrogen peroxide so that I could clean Matt’s cut on his head.
I walked back out to the kitchen to see Matt looking through his fridge for any cold alcohol that wasn’t champagne. “All of the good stuff is warm,” I spoke, breaking the silence. I knew he would need a drink after what happened.
“I also brought stuff to clean the wound on your head,” I told him, holding up the supplies so that he could see what I was talking about.
He let out a sigh and closed the fridge before walking over to one of the kitchen chairs. Once he sat down I tilted his head up before I began to gently dab at the cut with a soaked cotton ball. I watched as he flinched slightly from the stinging sensation, I knew it would sting slightly, and I felt horrible for what happened.
“I’m going to move out,” I told him. He looked up at me, his hazel eyes full of hurt.
“Robyn, please don’t,” he begged me.
“Matt, I have to, I’ve overstayed my welcome, you got hurt, I fucked things up between you and Brian. It’s time that I get an apartment that’s all my own. I need to focus on my daughter and I.” I told him.
The poor guy looked like he was about to cry, and I felt bad for what I had said, but I didn’t want to damage Matt and Brian’s relationship more than what I already had.
“Please Robyn, don’t do this. Stay, stay with me. Brian will get over it, let me provide for you,” he begged me, tears threatening to fall from his face.
I felt horrible, I really did. In all the years that I had known Matt, I had never once seen him cry. Not until now.
“Please let me do this Matt,” I said, running my thumb over his cheek. “I need to do this for me, and if I don’t do it for me, I should at the very least, do it for my daughter. She doesn’t need to see what is happening between the three of us.”
This morning had started off so well. Matt and I were enjoying a nice breakfast, then bam. Brian comes along and fucks everything up.
Whenever Matt finally realized that I was not going to budge on my decision, he let out a soft sigh. Pulling me into a tight hug, I knew he was still upset with me. I honestly didn’t blame him, this was a tough decision for me. I didn’t want to leave Matt’s house, but I had to. I had to do it for Alexis and me. I had to do it to keep their friendship alive.
“Trust me Matt, this is a tough decision.” I said softly, rubbing his back as he held me in his arms.
“At least let me help you pick the place out?” he asked, his hazel eyes filled with hurt. I hesitated a moment before nodding my head. “Okay,” I said softly.
He kissed my head, and I looked up at him.
“I’m sorry for everything Matt,” I said softly.
I knew it was going to be difficult to find an apartment for rent. Especially one that allowed dogs. I wasn’t going to leave my little Storm behind.
I pulled away from Matt and walked over to the cabinet. I pulled out two shot glasses and grabbed a bottle of his whiskey.
“Let’s do some shots,” I said to him, “We need to cheer up. We can’t let him ruin the rest of our day because all we want to do is mope around and do nothing,” I poured each of us a shot. I held my glass up, clinking it with his, I quickly downed the amber liquid and poured another one.
EEEEEEEEEE! She said yes! Yay! I still want to slap this Brian into next week -_-
11/4/17