So Far Away

I adjusted my position again, trying to get comfortable in the stupid seat on the plane. I barely got any sleep last night. After the dream I had too much on my mind. I kept thinking about the way Matt kissed me on the beach and how I’d reacted. As much as I told myself I didn’t want it, my body betrayed me. It didn’t help at all that my back was pressed against his chest all night. Even though he was fast asleep every time I tried to move away he just held on tighter. I could almost imagine that we were like any other couple enjoying a vacation together. The fact that I liked that thought so much scared me a little bit. But I was also coming to the realization that I should stop pulling away from him. I liked him, that much was obvious to me. It was time to actually give him a chance.

“It is impossible to get comfortable in this fucking seat.” Chuckling, Matt raised the armrest that separated us and put his arm around my shoulders. I moved closer and leaned against him, finally finding comfort for the first time since I’d been on the godforsaken plane.

“Better?”

“Actually, yes. You make a good pillow, Sanders.” It wasn’t long before I drifted off to sleep.




A voice nearby pulled me from my sleep. I blinked a few times as I looked around trying to figure out where the hell I was. Oh yeah, airplane.

“How long was I asleep?” I asked through a yawn.

“We’re going to be landing soon.”

“It felt good to get a nap in. I barely slept last night.”

“Nightmares again?”

“No. Just a lot going on in my mind.”

“You were thinking about me, weren’t you?” I rolled my eyes at the smirk on his lips.

“Maybe I was, maybe I wasn’t. I’ll never tell.”

“So since we’ll soon be back to reality. What do you say about going to dinner with me? Tonight?”

“Eager, much?”

“I don’t want to wait anymore. I want to know where this could go.”

“One date isn’t enough to know where this could go.” I was doing it again. Trying to make excuses to keep my distance.

“But maybe it’s enough to make you stop running away from your feelings.”

“Okay, I will go to dinner with you.” I said the words quickly before I could change my mind, but after they were out there I knew I didn’t want to. I was ready for this, well as ready as I would ever be at least.

“Just like that? Wow. I have to be honest I was expecting some more arguing from you.”

“I guess you just did a good job of convincing me. Though I could always change my mind,” I teased.

“I’m not letting you out of it now.” I snuggled into his side again with a smile on my lips. There was a bubbling sense of exciting growing in me. Now that I had finally decided to stop holding back, I couldn’t wait to see what would come next for us.




Matt grabbed our bags from the trunk of the taxi. Typical man, having to carry everything in one trip.

“You’re going to hurt yourself,” I called out as I followed him up to his front door then inside to the living room.

“Just hang out in here, I’ll be back down in a minute.” I nodded and walked over to some pictures framed on the wall. It was mostly just snapshots over the years of band stuff. A couple of Matt with his parents. Then one of him and Jimmy that made my heart thump almost painfully in my chest. It had been taken a few years back before all the shit that went down. They both looked so happy.

The doorbell ringing pulled me from my thoughts and I wondered briefly if I should answer it. Then I heard Matt’s footsteps coming down the stairs so I stayed put. From where I was standing I could see down the short hallway to the front door. When he opened the door my jaw nearly hit the floor.

“Val?” Matt asked in disbelief.

“I missed you so much!” She flung herself against him hard enough that he stumbled back a few steps and his arms wrapped around her. “I’m so sorry about everything. Leaving you was a mistake.”

Then to my horror she raised herself up onto her toes and kissed him. I spun around quickly and made my way to the back door as quietly as possible. I didn’t need or want to see anything more.

I walked down the street, not knowing where I was going just wanting to get away from Matt’s house. My feet carried me to a small, deserted park and since I was finally tired of walking I sank down onto a swing. I pulled out my phone and dialed Zack’s number, he answered on the third ring.

“Can you come pick me up? I’m at the park a few blocks down from Matt’s house.”

“I thought he was driving you home?”

“Change of plans. Will you come get me or not?”

“I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

Notes