Matthew

Ever since I fucked up and kissed Spencer she has been avoiding me. I don't know why I kissed her when she came to my room to explain why she lied to Zack. I was so pissed at her at first. Why was I so pissed at her? Honestly, I think it was because I wanted to be with her and I knew I couldn't be.

I was glad when we realized that we were getting a week off. I needed to clear my head and get away from Spencer. The crowd was amazing in Los Angeles. We went out for the encore after the show and they loved it. Afterwards, I overheard Jason Berry tell Zack that Spencer went to the bus. I contemplated going out there and attempt to talk to her while we had some alone time but decided against it. We hung out inside for a little while and then headed outside.

The fans cheered as we walked out of the backstage door. They begged us to sign their miscellaneous items. It took us half an hour to get passed the crowd and to the bus. I noticed Zack wasn't with us when we entered the bus but didn't care much. Maybe Spencer would be more willing to talk to me if he wasn't around.

As Johnny handed me a beer I hear Spencer ask about Zack. There was a little chit chat and before I knew it she ran out the door in search of Zack.

I downed my beer and grabbed another. I'm not sure why the jealousy has been so out of control lately. I used to be so good at hiding it but these last few weeks have just gotten harder and harder.

I don't know how much time passes before the bus door opened and Zack runs in. He ignores all of us and walks back to the bunks. He emerges seconds later with his phone charger.

"Dude, what's wrong?" Brian asked him.

Jimmy pipped up, "Where's little bird?"

Zack doesn't answer until he shoves the charger into the outlet and the other end is secured to his phone. "I, uh, need to...use your phone," he falters. No one knows who he is speaking to so Brian offers his phone first. Zack grabbed it and after a few taps, raised it to his ear. After a few seconds, he groans. "Baby, please call me back. You shouldn’t be out there alone. Please call someone so they can come get you. We need to talk about this. I love you."

Zack’s message made me perk up. "What's going on?"

Zack sighed and hands the phone back to Brian. "I fucked up dude."

Johnny offered Zack a beer. He refused it. "Care to explain?"

Zack sighed again. "Well, for starters I'm still fucking married to Gena."

"What?" Jimmy laughed. The thought of it was ridiculous. They had gotten divorced like five years ago.

"How the fuck does that happen?"

Zack shook his head. "I found out a couple of months ago. Something happened to the paperwork, it never got filed. That's why I was texting Gena so much. I was trying to get her to sign the papers. She refused until yesterday she told me if I could get her backstage to talk she would bring the papers and sign them. I saw her and we went to a private area so no one would find out and it was all a fucking trick. She kissed me and Spencer just happened to walk by at the wrong moment." Zack ran a hand through his hair. "Now she thinks I'm cheating on her and I'm not!"

"Holy shit!" Brian shook his head. "I knew Gena was a bitch but..."

I didn't care about Gena. She wasn't what was important here. "Where is Spencer now?" I asked.

Zack's phone finally lights up. He picks it up, sends what I'm assuming is a text to Spencer and then answers. “I don't know. She ran out the front of the building. I tried to go after her but got swarmed by fans." I immediately stood from my seat and walked to the front of the bus. "Where are you going?" Zack asked.

"To go look for her," I told him simply.

Zack rolled his eyes. "I don't even know where she went, Matt."

I shrugged before walking off the bus knowing I had to at least try. I couldn't just sit there and wait for her to call. I knew she probably just needed to clear her head but we were in Los Angeles and there were a lot of bad people and places here. She wasn't safe and she especially wasn't safe in her emotional state.

I walked to the front of the building and sighed of relief when I see the parking lot was basically empty. I pulled out my phone and called Spencer, hanging up after it went to voicemail. I groaned, completely unsure of where to go or even where to start when a truck pulled up next to me.

"Matt, what are you doing?" Matt Berry asked me.

I ignored his question. "Have you guys seen Spencer?" I asked him and his brother.

They shook their heads in unison. "Not in a while."

"She got pissed and ran off," I explained.

The brothers looked at each other and then they got out of the truck. I gave them a confused look as Matt Berry handed me the keys.

"Take the truck and go look for her. You know her better than we do. We'll hang out on the bus and ride back on it if we have to."

I nodded. "I appreciate it, guys. Thanks!"

They shrugged. "Hey, we get to ride back on the tour bus while you drag that trailer around, sounds like a decent trade if you ask me." Jason smiled.

I laughed and they began to walk off in the direction of the bus. I hopped into the tuck before calling Spencer once more. Voicemail again.

I drove around for what felt like hours and the harder I looked the more worried I got. I hoped to God she didn't hitchhike back to Huntington Beach. Zack and Jimmy kept blowing my phone up and the more they called the more irritated I got just because I didn't have any new information or answers for them. I felt bad for Zack because I knew how worried he must have been but at the same time if he would have just told us what was going on with Gena, none of this would even be happening right now so it was safe to say I was a little annoyed with him as well.

I pulled over and called Spencer for the umpteenth time. I hope to hear her voice on ever ring. "Hello?" Came a voice, but it was much deeper and masculine than Spencer's.

"Who is this?" I asked.

"This is Shawn from Tony's Bar. The girl whose phone this is is...really fucking drunk and someone should come pick her up before something happens. She left her phone at the bar while she went off dancing with some guy, and if I'm being quite honest here I don't think the dudes intentions were good."

I hung up the phone and used the GPS on my phone to locate the bar. I groaned when it said the bar was ten minutes away but tried to be thankful that I at least knew where she was. I sent a quick text to Zack while I'm on my way there to let him know that I found her and I was on my way to get her.

Zack texts me back asking where she was so he could come but I told him not to worry about it. I didn't think a big tour bus with an oversized deathbat on the side was going to do us any favors. I didn't mention to him that she may run again if she seen him.

I finally arrive at the bar and I cringe at how sleazy it looked, and I've been to some sleazy-looking bars in my lifetime. I flash the bouncer my ID and walk in. I glanced around the room and worry filled me when I didn't see her. I made my way to the bar and catch the bartender’s attention.

"I’m looking for my friend. Someone here answered her phone," I told him.

"Oh yeah," he nodded while reaching into his pocket. He pulled out her phone and handed it to me. He took a look around the room as I did before and then turns back to me with an apologetic look on his face. "Sorry, man. I got slammed but she was here a few minutes ago."

I groan but nod anyways, it wasn't his fault. I begin to walk away when he catches me. "Also," he hands me a check, "she didn't pay her bill."

I glance at the bill before handing him some cash. I stand at the bar while I wait on my change and try to decide on where to look next. After a few seconds the guy next to me turns to me.

"Are you talking about the blonde headed bitch with the big titties?" He asked me. I didn't know how to respond so I don't. The guy begins talking again anyways. "I saw the snob go out back with some punk. You look like her type so I figure that's who..."

I turn and walked away before he could continue. The bartender calls after me because of my change, but I ignore him. I push the back door open and peer down the alley. I see two figures further down in the dark. Before I realize it I'm running to them. As I get closer I notice it's a guy and Spencer. He's pressed up against her with his hand up her shirt; I think she's enjoying the affection until I see her drunken body try to push him away from her. He doesn't budge, so I pull him by the collar of his shirt and throw a punch to his face. As he falls to the ground I grab Spencer's arm and lead her away.

"Matt?" She slurred. She yanked her wrist away from me. "Let go of me!"

"Spencer fucking stop! Do you know how worried everyone is about you? We've been calling you for hours!" I yelled.

"I’m a fucking adult. I'm allowed to go out and get drunk!" She tried to walk away from me. I rolled my eyes as I picked her up and tossed her over my shoulder. She slapped at my back until I reached the truck and threw her into the cab. She reached for the passenger side door but I grabbed her ankle and stopped her.

"Stop acting like a fucking lunatic!" I demand. I was tired and angry; I didn't want to fight with her.

"I can't be around him right now, Matt!" She yelled back. I didn't realize she was crying until her voice cracked.

My face and toned instantly softened. "I won't take you to him, okay? You can stay with me or we'll get you a hotel room. Just...please, calm down."

Spencer nods and she sniffs and dries her eyes. I climb into the driver’s side of the truck as she brings her knees into her chest. My phone rings just as I start the ignition of the truck.

"Zack, hey..." I answer.

Zack's voice is worried and impatient. "Did you find her? Is she okay?"

I glance at her, "Yeah."

"Okay, so are you guys almost back to the bus?" He asked.

I sighed, knowing this next part was going to piss him off. "I'm just going to go home. You should too. Tell the Berry's..."

He interrupted me. "What? No, I need to talk to her. I need to see her."

"She doesn't want to see you, dude." I tell him quietly.

"I don't...Matt, I need to! Please." He sounded desperate, hurt. I wanted to give in because I care about him and I hate hearing him like this but I knew I had to think of what was best for Spencer right now.

"I'm sorry, dude. I'll get her back safely and try to convince her to call you in the morning when she's sober."

Zack didn't reply for a long time and when he did it was followed by a heavy sigh. “Okay," he said. His voice cracked. "Will you just tell her I love her?"

"Of course," I mumble before hanging up. I glance at Spencer again as I begin to head for the highway. She's no longer crying into her knees but instead is sitting with her legs crossed and her hands are resting in her lap.

"He said he loves you," I tell her. She didn't acknowledge me and I don't try to speak to her again.

---

The drive home was completely silent. I never even turned on the radio. I half expected Zack to be waiting for us when we got back to my house but he wasn't. We headed inside and Spencer headed directly to the liquor cabinet.

"Spence, let's go to bed it's been a long night." I urge.

"Drink with me," She smiled. It's the first smile I seen since I picked her up. She had a bottle of Cîroc in one hand and a bottle of Patròn in the other. The thought is tempting but I know I'm being selfish. This is the longest Spencer has talked to me in weeks, and I didn't want it to end because I knew when she woke up in the morning she would probably go back to being mad at me. I knew I should put her to bed but instead I take the bottle of Cîroc from her hand and open it as she brings the bottle of tequila to her lips.

After a while, I began to feel slightly tipsy and my greedy eyes couldn't keep themselves off of Spencer’s body as she danced in my living room. Her eyes were closed and she swayed her hips to the music she had turned on. I know this was wrong. It was unfair, not only to Spencer but to Zack as well.

I stood up from the couch, "Spence, we should go to bed." She ignored me. I bit my lip before grabbing her. "Spence, for real. You need your sleep."

She pouted up at me as the song changed. "One more song?" She begged. I wasn't sure if I could take one more song. My body already craved hers. Before I could respond, she had my hands on her hips. The song was upbeat and fast but she moved slowly against me. As the song progressed I began to move backwards, away from her. My body couldn't handle it anymore and I had to get away from her before I did something stupid like kiss her again.
"You're an awful dance partner," she laughed. "You're supposed to stay pressed up against me."

I chuckled but it got stuck in my throat as she brought my hands back to her hips again, but then she started to slide them upwards. Before I could stop her my hands were under her shirt. Her bare skin sent electricity through my fingertips as she slid my hands up her side.

"Matt, do you know what they say about tequila?" She asked me. I can't focus on my words well enough for them to come out of my mouth. She stopped moving my hands up her body and whereas a part of me is relieved another part is disappointed. Suddenly, our eye contact is broken by a piece of fabric coming between us. "It makes a girls clothes fall off," she laughed as she tossed her shirt aside.

Her actions surprise me and I stumbled backwards onto the couch. My hands are stilled glued to her waist and so she fell into my lap. She laughed and straddled me. "Spencer," I began.

She puts her hands on my shoulders. "You kissed me the other day."

Her drunken words surprised me. I knew this conversation would happen, but didn't expect it to happen tonight. It's not a question but I answer her anyways. "Yeah," I mumbled, looking away from her.

"Do you like me more than a friend?" She asked. It's a childish question but it's an honest one. I knew I couldn't admit it to her, not now; not like this.

"Let's go to bed," I whisper.

She shakes her head. "The song isn't over."

I look at her to say something but before I could say anything, she kissed me.

It didn't take long for my body to respond instinctively. Her tongue slipped into mine as I pulled her closer to me. She tasted of a variety of liquor and I knew this was wrong, but I wanted her so bad. She moved her mouth to my neck and began to nibble.

"I want you," She whispered into my ear.

At the sudden moment, reality hit me and though it took every ounce of energy I had, I was able to slide from out from beneath her and leave her sitting on the couch. My body instantly missed her touch. I ignored it.

"Matt?" She reached for me.

I shook my head. "I can't, Spence."

My actions and words hurt her but I know it's just the alcohol making her act this way. I knew she loved Zack and she would regret this in the morning, if she even remembers it.

"You don't want me?" She asked quietly.

I pulled her to her feet. "I do," I admitted. "But not like this. Come on, you need sleep. You'll feel much better in the morning. You can take my bed; I'll sleep in the guest room." She reluctantly agreed before she followed me upstairs, stumbling with every step.

Notes

A chapter for you lovelies! Chapters on all of my stories may or may not start slowing down due to me finishing a house I'm remodeling and then moving into. I hope it wont mess with my updates, but I can't make any promises at this time! Until next time, comments, votes and subscriptions would be so amazing! Thank you for reading!!

Huge thank you to Khloe Kardash for mentioning this story in her blog interview on mibba! Seriously means a lot! You can read that here if you'd like!

Title credit: Avenged Sevenfold "The Stage"

The guys are playing at Knotfest in Mexico today! MeRi and I hope they play they new song, what about you guys? Have you heard "The Stage"? Do you absolutely love it? I do!