I was sitting in my car, in the middle of the road, I looked out my window and saw a red truck rushing towards me, I tried to start the car but it was useless, nothing was happening, I heard crying, I looked in the backseat and saw two babies bundled up in blue blankets, the crying got louder, I tried to reach my hand in to comfort them, tell them everything was going to be okay but I couldn't my arms couldn't reach them I was stuck, "Let me help you get rid of them" I heard a voice say, I screamed no at the voice.

I shot up in bed, the sweat dripping from my brow, the sheets were sticking to my skin, where the hell am I? A woman barged in through the door.

"Are you okay, sweetie, I heard screaming, what happened?" Mary, I sighed with relief and nodded my head, "A bad dream, about the crash" I told her, wiping the sweat away from my face. Mary walked over to me and sat down on the edge of the bed, putting the dirty cloth she was holding to the side of her, "Oh, honey" she pulled me into a hug and then held onto my shoulders "You'll be alright" I saw her glancing to the letter on the bed side table and he eyes were squinting as if she was trying to read it. I out my hand up to grab it but she shook her head.

"I know you're pregnant, I came in earlier to check in you and saw it" she gave me a sad smile and rubbed my arm, "I'm not going to tell anyone, don't worry, it's not for me to tell" she looked away and then back at me "Whose the dad?" She asked her eyes staring into mine.

"I.. I don't know, Mary.. I.. it was.. I don't know" I said to her, feeling embarrassed, Mary was about to speak again but I stopped her "It's twins" I whispered she looked at me and her eyes lit up "I'm going to be a grandma, to two beautiful babies, I never trusted Brian to have any kids any time soon, with all this fame, just, I think you should tell the possible father's, please honey, it's the right thing to do" I nodded my head at her and she left the room, she was right I did have to tell them, I'd need to tell them so I could get DNA done.

I got up and put on clean clothes, I walked down stairs and saw Brian and Matt sitting with Mary "Are you okay?" Matt asked before Brian could get any words out, I nodded my head "We were going to come and check on you but Mary said that she's just go, in case we panicked you or whatever" I nodded my head again "I'm fine, just a bad dream" I gave them a weak smile.

Mary looked at me then Matt then back at me with one eyebrow raise I shook my head no slightly and she looked away, knowing what I meant. "Are you hungry? I could make you something to eat" Brian spoke up, I shook my head no and told him I wasn't hungry but in reality I was starving, I don't know why I told him no.

"Where's my dad?" I asked anyone who would answer. "Work, sweetie, he tried to get the day off but they couldn't let him" I just stared and then asked to be excused, I walked back into my now bedroom, and sat on the bed, there was a bathroom right next door from my room, maybe I should just take a long bath. I got up and walked into the bathroom and turned on the hot tap, I poured bubble bath in and left, searching for a towel, I found two big white fluffy towels and brought them into the bathroom with me, I stopped the water and stripped my clothes off me, I stepped into the warm water and I felt like I instantly relaxed, I lay there, stretched out, soaking in the lavender scented water, K closed my eyes and thought about my two babies, I was growing not just one life but two, i had to find out who their dad is, I didn't want to tell anyone just yet, I was still trying to come to terms with it myself.

I remember when I was 16, my mum's boyfriend had raped me, my mum was too drunk and too high to care, he done it every night for two weeks straight, ignoring my cries, ignoring the way I would slap him, punch him, kick him, a month later I found out I was pregnant, I told my mum and she of course told her boyfriend, my mum called me everything under the sun, her boyfriend beat me, punched my stomach over and over again, he told me he'd help me get rid of it, each lunch would be harder than the last. A week later I suffered a miscarriage, it broke my heart, an innocent little baby lost its life and none of it was the babies fault. No one knew what happened, not my dad, not my aunt, no one, everything that happened in that house stayed in that house.

I took a sharp breath in and held my stomach, I wouldn't let anything happen to my babies. I climbed out the bath and wrapped one of the towels around me, I grabbed my clothes and out them in the washing basket, I left and stepped back into my bedroom. I got dressed and got on with the rest of my day.

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Two months have passed, I've settled in nicely, my dad and I have been catching up with all the years we missed with each other, Mary and I had a good relationship as well, she was better to me than my own mother, the guys and I have grown close together, especially Brian and I, we still haven't really spoke about what happened when we first met each other, but none of us wanted to bring it up, we were acting like it was just a bad dream. I'm 4 months pregnant and I have a fairly large bump, it's been getting harder to hide, I've still not told anyone, I was scared, only Mary knew and she was having a difficult time hiding it from my dad, she was so excited but so sad that she couldn't speak to anyone about it. Whenever I had the dreams of me and my babies dying she was always there, she would get up in the middle of the night, she'd get up early hours in the morning to just help me, she done it mostly so no one would notice the large bump, I owed her everything, she was my hero.

"Sienna" Mary whispered, everyone was over for dinner, Christmas was just around the corner and we were going around everyone's house to have dinner on the nights leading up to Christmas. "Sienna, I think you should tell everyone, tonight?" I looked at her and shook my head no.

"I can't, I just can't what do I say?" She looked at me with sad eyes. "I'll tell them if you want? But you can't hide it for much longer, your bump is starting to get really big, it's not just one child your hiding, it's two, look at it the now, your stomach is showing out the bottom of your top, you can see the veins" she grabbed the bottom of my top and pulled it down and pulled my cardigan over me trying to hide it some more.

"What are my two favourite ladies talking about" My dad came into the kitchen and kissed Mary, she looked so stressed out, she has been for the past months, she gave him a smile, her wrinkles were apparent, I shouldn't have gave her all this weight to carry. "Just some girl talk" she answered him, giving him a hug "I love that you two are getting on so well" my dad said and I gave him a smile. "Well you and the boys should go and sit down, we'll be through in a minute with food" Mary patted my dad's chest and he happily done what he was told and left.

"Okay" I said looking away. "I'll tell them, tonight" she brought me in for a hug and kissed the top of my head. "Don't worry about it, everything will be fine, we just can't hide it any longer, you know that yourself" I nodded my head agreeing with her, she was right.

We got everyones plates and brought them through, Brian and my dad sat on the couch, Jimmy and Zacky sat on the other one and Matt was sitting on the reclining chair and Johnny was left to sit on the floor, we handed their plates to them and Jimmy and Zacky got up to let Mary and myself sit down. Everyone was talking, complimenting the food we made, everyone was drinking except me and Mary, she didn't want to make me feel left out but I could she was wanting tk have a glass of wine.

I started to feel some cramping in my stomach, and it was getting intense, Ifellt a bead of sweat drip down my brow but I quickly wiped it away.

"I think Sienna has something to say to everyone" Marry looked at me and gave me a warm smile, and rubbed my shoulder. I stood upand looked at everyone who were all waiting on me talking.

"I.. uhhhh..." I got another intense pain in my stomach, I put my hand on my stomach and tried to stop myself from doubling over in pain.

"Are you okay, sweetie?" My dad sat up a bit, showing concern, the rest of the guys were all looking at me confused, I ignored all of them and turned to Mary. I could see the colojr draining from her face. "Shit" she stood up and shouted at someone to call an ambulance, I looked behind me to see what she was looking at, a puddle of blood.

"No, this can't be happening, not again" I looked at her the tears rolling down my cheek.

"Listen to me honey, you are going to be fine" She rubbed my arms and tried to calm me down, another pain went through my entire body, I gripped into her with one hand and my stomach with he other hand I let out a loud moan.

"What the fuck is happening" my dad yelled, Mary turned around and still had one hand on me, as if she was trying o protect me. "She's pregnant, I think she might be in labour, is the ambulance on its way?" She tried to say as calm as possible bit I could hear she was holding back tears.

"They're on their way" Jimmy said.

I sat down with my head in between my knees,another pain shooting through me, more intense than the last one "No, not again, not again" I groaned.

Everyone was yelling, I couldn't understand any of what they were saying, the pains were coming quick and worse than before. Five minutes had past and two men had walked into the house saying there names but I couldn't comprehend anything they were saying.

"She's losing a lot of blood, wee need to get her to hospital now" one of the men said, I was lifted up and carried to the ambulance, I saw my dad's face, I could feel his heart breaking, the tears were streaming down his face, "I love you baby girl" he said to me.

Mary wanted to come with me but she was in to much of a state to come with me, Brian had ended up in the back of the ambulance with me, he told them that he was my brother and all the stuff they needed to know, I passed out.

I woke up to someone giving me a jag, I saw Brian at the side of me and his eyes lit up when he saw me,before he could say anything the doctor spoke up.

"Okay Miss. Haner, we managed to stop the contractions, you had to get a blood transfusion, that was no surprise considering all the blood you lost, your babies are fine but we'd like to do another one just to check everyone over, I will be back five minutes with the ultrasound, sit tight" he told me everything and walked off.

I looked at Brian "Thank god you're okay, everyone's worried sick, why didn't you tell anyone?" He asked me and I just shook my head.

The doctor returned with a machine rolling in front of him, he sat down and pulled my top up exposing my big pregnant stkmach, Brian stares at it with big eyes. The doctor poured the gel onto my stomach and started moving the ultrasound around. "Okay, Miss. Haner, just like I said, they are happy and look comfortable, they just wntes to give mommy a little scared is all" I let a sigh of relief go "They have actually changed the position they were last in, would you like to know the sex of your babies?" I nodded my head and he turned the screen so it was facing me and Brian "That there is a little girl" I started crying, I was going to have a daughter? "And that there" he said pointing to a different part of the screen. "Is a little boy" I started crying harder, a little boy?

"I'm having a niece and a nephew?" Brian spoke loudly and the doctor nodded his head, Brian brought me in for a hug and he started crying as well.

The doctor left but before he did he told me if I experience any discomfort or any light bleeding I had to go back to hospital.

"I'm going to all mom and dad" Brian told me, I nodded my head saying okay.

"Hi mom, it's me - Yeah She's fine - She can come home today - The babies are fine - She found out the sex of them" he laughed down the phone, Mary must have been excited "Girl - And a boy" he said, I could here excited screams over the phone and I chuckled "Okay, see you soon" Brian ended the call and looked at me and laughed, "She's crazy" he said to me.

"Thanks for coming with me, Brian, seriously" I told him and he patted my leg. "It's no bother, it was scary, seeing you like that, I felt helpless... Sienna?" He asked me and I hummed, signalling for him to continue. "Who's the dad?" He asked, I looked away from him for a second.

"I don't know, it could be you... Johnny or... Zacky" I told him, I pinched the bridge of my nose and all he said was oh.

Notes

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