Three; Save me

I woke up in Matt’s spare bedroom; I loved this room.

It was black and white, one wall was a huge mirror; I didn’t know who decorated this room but I absolutely loved it.

I laid in the bed for a while thinking about what I should do, should I go back to Brian’s and hope he’s sober or should I stay here and focus on healing myself for a bit.

I really didn’t know what to do, I decided a good start would to at least go downstairs and see what Matt was up too.

I made my way downstairs; I was still in Matt’s t-shirt that he let me sleep in.

As I entered the kitchen Matt had breakfast all ready and coffee on the go.

“It smells delicious in here” I said.

“Good, I hope you’re hungry” Matt said as he passed me a plate with pancakes, bacon, eggs, and toast on it.

He sat next to me at the island and we both ate in peace.

“Holy” Matt blurted out, once we were done eating and he was putting our plates in the sink.

“What?” I asked.

“That bruise on your arm has gotten pretty dark; you must have hit that car door pretty good”

“Oh yeah, I guess so” I said as I tried to shrug it off.

Matt stood there staring at me; I tried not to make eye contact with him.

“Be straight with me, you didn’t hit that on your car door” Matt stated, his eyes were burning into mine.

I shook my head no, “I knew it, why’d you lie to me?” Matt asked his voice calm and steady.

“Can we just leave it alone Matt”

“No, I want to know, it was him wasn’t it? That’s why you came here the other night, that’s why
you couldn’t be around him”

Matt was right on the money with this one, but I knew if I told him he would flip out.

Instead I just chose not to answer him, I just sipped on my coffee, I could feel his hazel eyes focused on me.

“I’m right aren’t I, I’m going to give him a piece of my mind” Matt said as he started putting on his coat.

“No, No, No, don’t Matt, please, just leave it alone, he was drunk and upset, he didn’t mean it” I pleaded.

“Why would I do that Axl, he physically hurt you”

“Just stop please, he’s upset about Jim, he doesn’t know what he’s doing that man is not Brian, he just needs some time” I pleaded more.

“Who are you trying to convince here Axl, me or you”

I shrugged my shoulders as I began to cry, I didn’t know what to do.

“Aw fuck,It’s okay, I’ll let it go for now, just don’t cry” Matt said as he hugged me.

“Come on, I’ll take you out to cheer you up” Matt continued to say.

I really wasn’t in the mood to go out, but Matt was at least trying to make me feel better, so who was I to say no.

Matt shooed me upstairs and once I was ready Matt and I headed out.

We pulled up to this building that I had never seen before, it was big and it looked pretty dark on the inside.

“Where are we?” I asked Matt who was grinning from ear to ear.

“Lazer tag, glow in the dark lazer tag” Matt specified.

“Lazer tag?” I asked sounding a little rude, we weren’t twelve after all.

“Have you ever played?” Matt asked.

I shook my head no, “Well don’t knock it till you try it, I know you’ll like it” Matt assured me.

We walked up to the counter, “Do you guys want to play as a team against someone else, or
against each other” the guy asked.

I knew Matt was going to say as a team, but I wanted to play against him, I was going to take him down off his high horse.

“We’ll play against each other” I said confidently.

“You think that’s a wise choice Baker? Since you’ve never played”

“You’re going down Sanders” I said.

We played a few games I won one, and Matt one the other two, but I didn’t make it easy for him that’s for sure.

“Well played Baker” Matt said as we walked out of the building.

“Thanks for taking me, I actually had a lot of fun” I said with a smile, and it was true I hadn’t had this much fun in a while.

“Should we stop by VU? Maybe see how Zack is doing?” Matt asked as we walked down the crowded street.

I hesitated for a minute, should we really be going to see Zack together, He might flip out if he sees Matt and I hanging out. Oh well I thought, its not like I had anyone else to hangout with.

“Sure” I replied back.

Matt and I crossed the street to get to the VU building.

Zack looked exhausted, his hair was messy and the bags under his eyes were hug.

“Oh hey guys” He said as he noticed Matt and I in the store.

“How you been man?” Matt asked not taking his eyes off Zack.

“You know lots of work” Zack said trying to play off his sadness.

Matt and I both nodded our heads in agreement as we both understood what he was going through.

I was surprised Zack had barely even noticed I was there; I hated seeing him like this it was tearing me apart inside.

“Can we go?” I whispered to Matt.

“Of course”

We both said our goodbyes to Zack and headed back towards Matt’s car.

Val’s Point of View:

Losing Jimmy has been hard on everyone, I know. Jim was one of my oldest, best friends and I really didn’t know how to cope without him being here.

Since losing Jimmy I wasn’t myself, Matt wasn’t himself; I don’t think anyone was going to get through this easily.

That’s why I decided to go away for a while, I needed time to collect myself, to make sure I could be there for Matt and my son emotionally, it wasn’t easy for me to leave my son or my
husband; especially after what had happened with him having an affair.

Staying with Michelle was helping me feel a lot better; we were currently up town getting some food to take home.

Michelle was talking my ear off about how much she wondered if brian was okay and if Axl was doing a proper job of taking caring of him.

“Does that answer your question?” I said to Michelle as I pointed at Matt and Axl walking down the otherside of the street.

Michelle instantly stopped talking and couldn’t look away from the direction my eyes were locked on.

“What the fuck is that?” she asked.

“Do you think they’re sleeping together again?” I asked, almost scared to know the answer.

“Do you think they’re both that dumb?”

“I don’t know Mich”

“Do you think Brian knows that they’re hanging out?” Michelle asked.

“He’s about too” I said as I flipped open my phone.

I wasn’t about to let this teenage girl ruin my marriage without ruining hers.

I called Brian’s phone over and over again, each time I got no answer.

So I decided to leave a message or 4.

“Brian, its Val im uptown and so are Matt and Axl, why are they hanging out? Do you know about this, call me”

“Brian, Axl and Matt are hanging out again, its Val…”

Axl’s Pov:

Matt and I got back to his house and while I felt so guilty about hanging out with him, I felt relived at the same time.

I wish Brian was being this way with me, I wish he would let me in the way Matt did.

I understood that Brian was the closest with Jimmy and that his world was completely shattered; But I was a part of his world too and I needed him.

“Wanna swim?” Matt asked, breaking me away from my thoughts.

“Sure”

I changed into my swim suit and made my way into Matt’s indoor pool.

I managed to get there before Matt did, so I made myself at home, I sat at the edge of the pool, my toes in the water, sipping a gin and tonic that Matt had made for me earlier.

Matt walked into the pool area, his tattooed chest was exposed and his board shorts fit tightly around his waist.

I felt my heart start to speed up and my palms start to get sweaty; what was going on, I couldn’t look away from him. I knew I needed to but I couldn’t.

“Why are you staring at me?” Matt asked with a chuckle.

I instantly felt my face go red, my legs began to feel weak, I don’t know what im doing I thought.

This was all so fucked up, if Jim was still here this would not be happening, Brian would be happy, he wouldn’t have grabbed me violently and he would still be the man I married.

I needed to get out of here and fast, I dont know how long I could control myself around Matt, I craved the attention he was giving me.

I quickly got out of the pool and slowly tried to make my way to the door as fast as I could with my wobbly legs.

Matt followed me to the kitchen where I began putting my pants back on.

“What’s going on?” Matt asked as he leaned up against the island in the kitchen.

I looked at him long and hard for a minute “I’m, I’m so lost, I love the attention you’re giving me, I feel like old feelings might be starting to come back” I stuttered out.

“It’s just because you’re vulnerable and you’re comfortable with me, look I’ll prove too you that this is nothing”

Matt slowly walked over to me, he stood in front of my face, his breath hot on my face.

His lips met mine and I didn’t want the kiss to stop, what exactly was this supposed to prove?

“I should go” I said as I pulled away from him.

Matt let out a sigh, “Please don’t go, I don’t want to be alone, just stay one more night”

“Okay, one more night” I caved.

Matt and I both sat at the island in the kitchen not knowing what to say.

“You know, Jimmy helped me get back at my very first boyfriend” I stated.

Matt looked up at me, that beautiful smile of his was spread across his face; he gestured for me to go on.

“I was dating this boy Kyle, I was 15 I think; He cheated on me with one of the girls at school and when I found out I forgave him. But not even two weeks later I went to a party and walked in on him with a different girl, he then had the nerve to break up with me at the party”

“I was devastated to say the least, he was the only guy I had ever actually liked, besides… you; anyways naturally I didn’t come out of my room and I was pretty broken up about it, I ended up telling Jim one day while we were out for lunch and he said he had a plan to help me get back at Kyle”

“Jimmy picked me up for school the next morning, we pulled up at school and he asked me to point out Kyle to him, so I did; Jim got out of the car and came and opened my door for me, once we were both out of the car, he pushed me up against it and started kissing me; once I entered the school everyone immediately started asking me who that guy was, even Kyle.

Jimmy did this for almost two weeks and it worked, Kyle thought Jim and I was dating and begged for me to get back together with him, he begged and begged, I had the satisfaction of turning him down in front of all his friends, it was great.
That was one of the nicest things anyones ever done for me, I’ve never told anyone that story” I finished.

Matt looked shocked and oddly happy about the memory I had just shared with him.

“Why did you tell me?” Matt asked.

I really didn’t know, I just felt that someone needed to know about one of the great things Jim had done for me.

“I don’t really know I just felt like I needed to share it with someone” I said as I walked back upstairs.

Brian’s POV:
Losing Jim was hard on me, I never in my life thought he would leave us this early. I knew it would hurt everyone, but it was literally killing me. I didn’t know how to go about my life without him; I didn’t know how to act or who to be.

I know Axl was just as upset as I was, she was really close to Jim too, but I couldn’t find the strength to be there for her. I felt awful about hurting her the other night, that wasn’t me that was the alcohol or the drugs, I wasn’t sure anymore.

My phone had been ringing off the hook all day, but I couldn’t even bring myself to get up and look who it was, it was probably Zack or someone phoning to threaten to kill me for grabbing Axl.

But now that I had sobered up a bit and I was out of alcohol I decided to check the phone, I had at least 5 messages from Val.

“Brian, its Val im uptown and so are Matt and Axl, why are they hanging out? Do you know about this, call me”

I slammed my phone shut I couldn’t stand to hear anymore, no wonder she hadn’t been home yet.

I looked around the room for anymore alcohol at all, no luck. All I had was some heroine that I had been shooting up; I started wrapping my arm up so my veins would stick out more, I grabbed the needle and stuck it into my arm, I waited a minute after injecting the heroine into my veins, I let my arm loose and felt the drugs take over.

I couldn’t deal with it if Axl was sleeping with Matt again, if it were true Jimmy would be seeing me very soon.

Notes

Matt's spare bedroom; http://greenclogs.com/wp-content/uploads/creative/creative-black-bedroom-design-ideas-for-cool-men-boys-room-with-interesting-concept.jpg

Axl's bathing suit; http://www.polyvore.com/three/set?id=140648833