Avery’s POV

I hugged my arms around my body as ragged sobs shook my petite frame. My heart was breaking with each step Brian took away from me and it took everything in me to not race after him. I wanted nothing more than to be by his side but that tug of guilt was the only thing stopping me. It hurt to see him leave and turning him away was definitely the hardest thing I had ever done. I was in physical pain as he pulled away, giving me that heart-wrenching wave. I was doing the right thing—at least that’s what I was trying telling myself. Though I didn’t believe it. If this was right, then why did it feel so wrong to let Brian go?

“Avery?” A car door slammed but I didn’t even notice. I was watching Brian’s car disappear around the corner with an aching heart. Did I just give up my only chance to be truly happy? Was everything over between Brian and I now? The thought of losing him forever was literally killing me inside and I felt like I was going to be sick.

“Avery!?” I blinked and looked up to see my father’s angry expression staring down at me. Great, on top of losing everything that I loved, Dad was pissed at me. What did I do now? I just couldn’t fucking win. “What the hell was Brian doing here?”

I looked up and took a shaky breath, trying to control the whirlwind of emotions inside me. “Nothing…” I chocked out through my tears before turning to go back into the house.

“So he just came to drive around the block when he should have been on the road? Don’t you dare lie to me, Avery,” Dad snapped, following after me. “I’m not in the mood for these games.”

“He’s gone so what difference does it make? You got exactly what you wanted,” I shot back, my temper starting to rise with the tears.

“What are you talking about?” Dad slammed his briefcase down on the island and I stormed through the kitchen, making a cup of coffee that I probably wouldn’t even drink. I had felt so sick to my stomach for the past few days that I had barely eaten anything. I was just going through the motions of my normal routine even though now I felt complete crushed inside—maybe even dead.

“They’re all gone—Brain, Maya, and all the Avenged Guys—that's exactly what you wanted. Now you don’t have to worry about anyone coming near your precious little girl,” my voice was dripping with venom right now and I couldn’t help it. I was hurt, angry, and devastated because he had chased away everyone that I had ever loved.

Dad ran his hands over his face and shook his head. “Stop with the dramatics, Avery. This was all for the best. It was better it all ended now before you got too attached and finally saw their true colors. It’s better this way.”

I scoffed and slammed the spoon down on the counter. “It’s better this way? It’s better this way?!” I hissed, looking at him incredulously. “Have you seen me the past two days? I’m fucking miserable, Dad! You wouldn’t even let us explain! Don’t you think I’m fucking smart enough to know when someone is screwing me over?!”

“Avery Marie Jacobson, you watch your mouth,” Dad pointed a warning finger at me. “I thought so but you proved me wrong. Synyster Gates is not boyfriend material, not matter what he tells you. He will have a new fling tonight guaranteed! You’ll thank me for this.” He was pointing at me with a smug look on his face as he picked up his coffee. That’s when I lost it.

“You’re wrong!” I yelled at him shaking my head, the tears streaming down my face. “Synyster Gates may not be relationship material, but his true identity, Brian Haner is. You’d think that you’d have better judgment in trust in your daughter and your artists. You don’t trust me at all! I am an adult dad and I can make my own mistakes!”

“Well this little tantrum you’re throwing right now proves that you are not an adult. And stop looking at all this through rose colored glasses. I thought you were smarter than this,” Dad sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. There was that look of disappointment in his eyes. “You would be miserable in a matter of weeks if I let him use you like I’ve seen him do countless times before.”

“I’m miserable now!” I cried, shaking my head at him. Couldn’t he see that? “What Brian and I have isn’t a fling! It’s real and Dad..I-I love him,” I sobbed.

The expression on my father’s face completely changed from disappointment to pure shock, and then back to anger. “Don’t be stupid Avery. You can’t love him.”

“Why not?! What do I—no we—have to do to prove to you that this isn’t some big farce?” I begged, my eyes pleading with my father. “Brian cares about me…and if I was some piece of ass for him, he wouldn’t have come begging for me to come with him just now. He would have went and found someone else to screw around with. You and I both know that’s what he would if that were the case. Why cant you see what is right in front of you?”

“This topic is done, Avery.” Dad said curtly with a clenched jaw. “You’re just confused and I have no idea what kind of mind game he was playing today.”

“This topic is not done!” I argued, balling my fists. “Why can’t you accept or at least look at the possibility that this isn’t a game? You raised me well enough to see the signs of a faker, and that isn’t Brain. We both know that. Dad…Please… “ I was begging him to see reason now.

My dad sighed and took in a deep breath. I could see that he was trying to control his temper and I didn’t care that he was angry with me right now. I had to make him see reason. “I don’t know where this sudden defiance came from, but this isn’t my little girl. This is some sex-crazed woman that I don’t know anymore. What happened to my Avery?”

“I grew up, Dad! I am twenty-three years old and it’s about time that you start treating me like it!” I snapped back, shaking my head. He wasn’t going to guilt me out of my feelings.

“Then act like it!” He shot back, pulling out his phone and then shoving it in my face. “This is the man you claim to be so desperately in love with? This one surrounded by women?” I blinked down at the picture in the tabloid to see Brian surrounded by girls at what appeared to be Johnny’s. In the background, I could see Matt and Maya dancing. This was from last night… “Are you so sure now?”

“I-I…he—“ I stammered, shaking my head. He wasn’t touching any of them, hell they looked like fans to me. And I was pretty sure he was on the phone in his picture, talking to me. I remembered him having to put me on hold for a minute so he could sign some autographs. This had to be this moment.

“See, Avery…trust me when I tell you this is for the best. You’re staying here with me and you’re going to take a summer course online, end of discussion. You’re about to graduate next year, start focusing on your career instead of playboy rockstars. I’m sorry to tell you, sweetheart but he doesn’t love you and he never will. What you have is a summer fling.” With that my dad turned and left me gapping after him with new tears running down my face. He wasn’t right. He couldn’t be. “I’m doing this to protect you, Avery. I have your best interests at heart and you’ll thank me for it one day.”

I shook my head and stormed after him. No, this was not the end of this discussion. “You’re doing this for your best interests!” I screamed after him, following him to his office. He turned on me so quickly that I thought he might actually reach out and strike me. Granted, my dad had never hit me in his life, but he sure did look like he wanted to right now. “You’re the one being selfish here! You can’t stand to see me grow up and move on! I am not going to back down on this and you need to see that! I’m not a little girl you can tell what to do anymore! I could up and leave any time and there is nothing that you could do about it!”

“Avery. Marie. Jacobson.” Dad hissed in the deadliest tone I have ever heard. I took a small step backwards, biting my lips as my newfound confidence slowly dissolved. “How dare you? Who are you? I don’t even know you anymore. You’re the selfish one running your life into the ground with these foolish grandeurs. Not only have your actions lost Maya but you have lost who you are. I have never been more disappointed in you then I am right now. Go to your room…I-I cant even look at you right now. I cant believe this…”

I gapped at him, seeing the pain in his eyes. I didn’t cause this…I couldn’t have made all this happen. At that moment, his eyes met mine and I could see all the damage I had caused, making the tears rise again for a whole new reason. My father hated me…and thought I was a failure. This feeling of guilt and betrayal hurt just as much as losing Brian.

“Dad I-I…”

“Just go to your room, Avery,” he sighed sadly and I knew I had pushed too hard too fast. Now I had lost everyone but would my dad forgive me?

The next five days passed slowly and quietly, my heart torn in two very different directions. One side of my heart wanted to make my dad proud and win back his affection, which I was trying to do by the way, just my whole heart wasn’t into it. I was doing all of my normal duties around the house, plus Mayas, and I even had baked him a few of his favorite deserts. He seemed to be coming around but I felt like part of me was missing in all this.

The other side of my heart was begging me to run away and go after Maya and the Avenged guys. Hearing their voices on the phone, seeing fun pictures, and Skyping was killing me because I wasn’t actually there. I guilty pretended I wasn’t available for most of their messages or chat requests because it hurt to see them. I felt like part of me was traveling around the country and I was trapped here without it.

“There’s my girl,” Dad said with a smile as he came into the kitchen and look a seat across from me. I had already set out his favorite breakfast of scrambled eggs, toast, and bacon. “What’s on the agenda today, Ave?”

I shrugged with a frown, looking down to see Brian’s picture flashing on my phone. He was inviting me for a chat session but I couldn’t take it now, not even if I wanted to. I had been avoiding chatting with him for the past three days because it hurt too much to see his face. I was afraid as soon as I saw him, I would burst into tears and I didn’t want to put him through that. And if I was being honest, I had been even more miserable since he left.

“I guess I’ll just work on my online class,” I muttered, pushing around my food. I still wasn’t really eating and I think my dad was starting to notice. He was looking at me with concern but I just pretended that I didn’t notice.

“Avery, you’re starting to worry me,” Dad started and I just got up and moved to put my plate in the sink, putting on a fake smile.

“I’m fine dad, I just didn’t sleep very well last night. The humidity was getting to me,” I lied, looking down at my phone to see four mixed text messages. I had two from Brian, one from Maya, and one from Zack. “I’m going to go for a dip in the pool.”

“Oh, Ave, I forgot to tell you,” Dad said, putting his hand on my shoulder. “I will be going out of town for the next two nights for some meetings and checking on my artists.” My eyes lit up a little bit, thinking that if he were going to see the guys, maybe he would let me come with him. I missed them terribly, especially Maya and Brian and I would give anything to be with them, even for a few hours.

“Where are you headed?” I asked, trying to find out without actually asking. I knew they were headed to Detroit right now and then to Columbus, Ohio.

“I’m off to Colorado,” he looked up from his phone with a raised brow. “Why?”

“Just wondering,” I shrugged, feeling my heart sink again. I was never going to see them again and that thought hurt more and more with each passing day. I was going crazy here by myself and all the fun messages, videos, and phone calls from that motley crew were not helping me to feel better. Contrary to popular belief, they made me feel homesick if that was even possible.

“Well, I need to head out, baby girl,” Dad said kissing the top of my head before pulling out his wallet. He placed a small stack of Benjamin’s on the counter, causing me to raise my brow. “I want you to enjoy yourself, maybe go shopping, see a movie with some friends, go to the spa, something. I just don’t want you moping around here for the next two days by yourself,” Dad instructed and I nodded. “Can you do that for me?”

“I’ll think of something,” I sighed, though nothing felt or sounded fun without Maya. I was really missing my best friend and I wished I had gone with her. Between missing her and Brian, a large chunk of Avery Jacobson was vacant. And though my dad couldn’t pinpoint what was wrong, he knew that I wasn’t fully here.

“That’s my girl,” he said kissing the top of my head and heading to grab his things. “I’ll see you soon and call you later. Love you, Ave.”

“Love you too, Dad,” I said with a half smile. I was glad that he had come back around and wasn’t angry with me anymore, but I wasn’t happy.

As soon as Dad was gone, I looked down at my phone and pulled up the text messages.

Are u ok? Haven’t answered my video chat requests in a few days. Everything ok? – Haner

I want to see that beautiful face. Send me a video message when u get a chance. Today is a bus day until the show at 8 – Haner

OMG u should see all the crazy shit Jimmy is doing today. I wish u were here. I miss u like crazy! Xoxo Maya

What’s up buttercup? How r u holding up today? Gates is losing is fucking mind, u better call him soon. He is turning into a little bitch. Miss u ~Z

I smiled down at my phone and sighed. This officially sucked and I wanted to be with my friends. Not only was I just sitting around here miserable, I was going to be sitting here by myself. Would I make it through these two days alone or would I finally lose my mind?

Just then my phone sounded again and this time Brian sent me a picture of him and Maya. My heart ached as I looked at the two of them. They were sitting next to each other on the bench with a drink in front of them. They looked happy and I wish I felt the same way.

Wishing you were here with us, love. Can’t wait to see you. I’m counting down the days until our next break—35 to be exact.

That was when I lost it. I would have to wait 35 days to see any of them in person? That wasn’t going to work for me. I couldn’t sit here alone for 35 days…no. I wouldn’t. My dad couldn’t ask me to sit in solitary confinement for that long. It wasn’t fair. And that’s when it hit me—Maya and Brian were right. I was old enough to make my own decisions and my dad would get over it. Just look how he came around after our fight on Monday. It proved it.

So what if dad was mad at me? If him being upset with me was the price of my happiness, I would surely take it. I just couldn’t believe that it took me a whole week to realize what Maya was telling me all along. I deserved to be happy and after seeing that picture of my best friend and the worlds most amazing boyfriend, I knew where I needed to be. I need to be with them to feel both alive and whole. When I was with them both, the real Avery Jacobson came out, the one that I was proud and comfortable with.

I quickly grabbed the cash on the counter and flew up to my room. I packed a suitcase, throwing in a wide assortment of clothing, dresses, the sexy underwear I bought for Brian, makeup, and my computer. I then launched into the shower and got myself dressed in a pair of tight denim jeans, a top that showed off all my curves, and curled my hair. By the time I was headed down the stairs, I didn’t recognize the girl I saw in the mirror. She looked beautiful, confident, and in love. Dad was right about one thing, I wasn’t little Avery anymore, I was developing into a confident woman.

A half an hour later, I was at the airport out side of Huntington Beach, waiting to get a ticket to Detroit. If I was lucky, I could meet them there tonight for their show and surprise them all. I hadn’t answered a single text message all day, so I hoped they would like the surprise.

I smiled to myself as I got my ticket and headed towards my boarding gate. I was going home to the ones I loved and I couldn’t be more excited.


Matt’s POV

“YOU WILL RELINQUISH ALL POWER TO ME!” Jimmy screamed, chasing Jason Berry around the back stage dressing room area with his arms above his head. “GIVE ME YOU’RE FUCKING POWER!”

“Put me down! I’m not built for this!” I heard Jason squeal and sure enough when I turned around, Jimmy was trying to lift Jason above his head. “Fuck I fucking give you my power! Just put me down!”

“Jimmy will you calm the fuck down, save your energy for the show!” I called, chuckling as Jason fell to the floor with a loud thud. I grabbed my earpiece and carefully placed it in my ear, catching a glimpse of a sulking Gates in the process.

“That’s why I need JB’s energy!” Jimmy sighed, flopping down on the floor and rolling about. This guy never stopped moving but I wasn’t surprised. I turned to Gates, leaving Zack to deal with Jimmy who was now throwing short shit around. Damn, we were in for one hell of a show.

“What’s up?” I asked, flopping down next to Gates on the couch and handing him his earpiece. “You look like someone kidnapped Pinkly.”

“What?!” Jimmy screamed, running and diving on top of both Brian and I. “What happened to my niece? Please say it aint so!?”

“Pink’s fine, Rev,” Gates half-heartedly chuckled. “I just haven’t heard from Ave all day…I think something is wrong. It’s not like her not to text or call…” He admitted and I looked down at my phone. Maya had been texting me from the merch booth since we got here, and she had mentioned that she hadn’t heard from Ave either.

“Little Gnome isn’t answering?” Jimmy restated, looking up at Brian with sad eyes. The pair of them had been weird ever since they got back on the road, almost like Jimmy felt guilty for not being able to get Ave too. They had spent a lot of time talking and drinking, even more than usual. If I didn’t know better, I would say Gates was falling or had fallen for the little brunette already, especially since he had been a bitch the past week without her.

“She hasn’t texted you either?” Zack asked, joining the conversation. “I though she was just ignoring me…”

“Nope.” Gates sighed and pulled his hands over his head and face. He looked stressed out and I knew we couldn’t take him on stage like this. We had to distract him.

“Maybe Larry took away her phone,” I suggested and that only made Gates pull at his head. “Look, you know she is crazy about you so just relax. I’m sure there is a reason we haven’t heard from her,” I didn’t dare tell him that Maya hadn’t heard from her either. That would send him over the edge.

“We need to go on a gnome hunt!” Jimmy said, bouncing up off Gates’ and I and making us wince in the process. “We will find her…give me a few minutes…I will figure this out!” he said, flying out of the room screaming for Jason again.

We all just shook our heads and carried on, not thinking Jimmy was doing anything out of the ordinary. That was just him. “We could always call Larry’s house and see if she will pick up. If it’s Larry we can make up some excuse,” Zack offered and I nodded in agreement. That was brilliant idea.

Gates quickly picked up his phone and dialed the number and a few seconds later cursed. “No one answered…maybe they are out of town. Should I even dare call Larry?” he asked and I shrugged.

“You better have a good excuse lined up instead of looking for his daughter,” I sighed, knowing how hard this had to be on him. In the day I though that I was losing Maya, I was going insane. I couldn’t even imagine being in his shoes. All I knew was that I excited to see my little beauty after our show. God I missed her already and we had only been apart two hours.

“I’ll call and ask about Ohio…see if he has those interviews lined up,” Zack offered and I could see the thankful look in Brian’s eyes. He really was losing his shit right now, and I had never seen him so heavily invested in a girl before. This was real and I just wished Larry could see it.

“What if she decided to move on?” Gates asked softly, watching Zacky pace and talk on his phone with Larry. “Decided that—“

“Don’t even go there Gates,” I chuckled, shaking my head. “When I got up to piss last night, I heard you talking to her. There is no way she changed her mind that quickly. Like I said, maybe her phone is gone or something. I’m sure she is okay.”

“So you’re in Colorado for a meeting then?” Zack said loudly. He shook his head indicating that Avery wasn’t with him.

“Fuck, where the hell is she?” Gates raged, standing up and kicking over the coffee table.

“I FOUND HER!” Jimmy screamed, running back into the room. “She is quickly moving across the US!” He announced proudly and we all just looked at him.

“What the hell are you talking about, Jimmy?” I asked, and within seconds he was sitting on Brian’s lap and pointing at things on his phone.

“See…she is moving!” Jimmy cheered, pointing down at the screen. “She is headed this way.”

“Jimmy I don’t know what this is, but there is no way she is moving this way,” Gates grumbled. “Whatever app you’ve got on your phone is wrong. She was staying in Huntington Beach.”

“Yes, but what if she decided to come out since Daddy is gone?” I suggested, only to receive a glare.

“It’s not funny…” he grumbled. Gates was getting pissed off more and more by the second. “We all know where she is…and if she wants it to be fucking over and ignore me, then fine…let’s go.”

“You don’t mean that,” Jimmy corrected, following after him towards the stage. “You love little gnome…”

As soon as the words left Jimmy’s mouth, Gates froze and his head whipped over to look at him. “What did you just say?”

“You love her. We all see it, just embrace it. Tell her…she’ll want to know. I know she feels the same way. You’ve seen the way those baby blues look at you…Knife Girl too…she just isn’t ready to say it,” Jimmy said simply, looking between Brian and I. What? Where did he get that information?

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” Gates huffed, looking hurt. I knew he was just upset because he didn’t have Ave with him but I thought Jimmy was right. Something was definitely different with Gates ever since he went to convince Ave to come again. It was a good different and I hoped he would embrace it. Being in love wasn’t a bad thing.

“Alright, are you assholes ready to go out on stage?” Matt Berry asked, coming around and giving all of us our traditional spanks.

“Let’s do this!” I had a good feeling about this show and an ever better feeling about the after party.

The show went by quickly and before I knew it, we were doing our final bow and walking off the stage. As I walked with Zack off the stage, I noticed a commotion with the roadies surrounding someone and laughing, cheering, and hugging.
“What is going on?” I asked and Zack just shrugged. We both pushed our way through the group to see a familiar face with gorgeous blue eyes.

“Ave!” Zack yelled, running over and scooping her up in his arms an spinning her around in circles. After a moment he set her back down on her feet, letting me move in and pull her into a hug. “What are you doing here? When did you get in?”

“I actually just got here for your last song,” she said, smiling ear to ear. She was anxiously looking around for Brian who was still on stage throwing guitar picks and shit at the fans with Jimmy and Johnny. “I couldn’t stay away any longer…” Avery giggled and I gave her another squeeze.

“Are you staying?” I asked, looking down at her.

“Yes…and Maya doesn’t know I’m here yet. I want to surprise her!” Avery looked the happiest I had seen her in a while, well, at least since her birthday party.

“What are you assholes doing?” I heard Gates call as he pushed through the circle of roadies. “Do we have another signing or are you just trying to—Ave?”

Notes

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