I Lost Me Long Ago

I marched into the elevator, slamming my hand against the bottom floor button. I'm not sure why I was so mad about this. He did this for me, and here I was selfishly stamping off!

The saddest part is I won't have to apologize for this self centered act. He will forgive me before he even sees me again.

"UGH!" I kicked the side of the elevator just as the doors swiftly opened. Revealing my tantrum to and young man.

I had never seen him before, he had dark features. Actually everything about him was dark, from his hair to his shoes. The only two things there weren't black, were his lovely green eyes and a white badge on his shirt pocket that had his name, and lovely photo of himself. All followed by the word INTERN.

Josh must have had him working late. He probably called him and asked him to come back in after I stormed off.

I nodded at him as I slipped past him.

"Don't I know your pain, darling." He muttered as we passed each other. As he was closer to me I could see the dark circles around his eyes. Poor thing probably hasn't slept in weeks.

And thanks to my selfishness it was another night of missed sleep for him.

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I spent about 30 minutes outside of their hotel convincing myself to walk inside. I had persuaded myself on the way over I didn't deserve any of the opportunities I could receive for walking into this hotel.

I yelled at Josh for him giving me such a great gift; such a great chance.

Yet I was dying to feel Matt's lips on mine for yet a third time.

Once I thought of that it took me only seconds to get myself inside and cross the lobby of the Hilton.

The normal night shift manage was plopped down behind the desk. She knew me well, I came with many an interviewer here to photograph artists, as well as come to do a handful of my interviews here.

She glanced up at me as she heard my boots click on the floor.

"Carsea!" She sing-songed as I met her desk. "Well there is no way you are here to see little old me." She was a frail older lady, she had the most beautiful shoulder length gray hair that she always kept down. Pale blue eyes that she hide behind a bold, black, square frame pair of glasses. I always thought she would make a perfect librarian.

"It says nothing about you Ms. Cameron." She smiled and wrote down something on a slip of paper and slipped it to me across the desk.

"Each have their own room. You might have to play musical doors if you are looking for a certain one. The manager passed out the keys." She shrugged and smiled at me as I took the paper from under her soft hands.

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I made it up to floor four about ten times. I also made it to floor five, seven, and ten about three times.

I was too scared to peel myself off the railing of the elevator. I was too intimidated by the idea of playing musical doors to find Matt. If I knocked on the wrong one it would be kind of hard to explain why I was coming back so soon.

Not like they don't have a damn clue.

We are adults.

I sighed and pulled my phone out of my pocket. Pressing the power button hard, begging it to turn on. But alas it was a dead as a door nail. There would be no texting him and asking. I couldn't just ask Ms. Cameron to call and find out of me, cause at this point she would know it was more than an interview.

I was just going to have to brave this, and hope for the best.

Just as I did the door dinged and opened to floor four for the eleventh time. No one was there, the hall was silent.

Fate?

I slowly slipped out of the elevator and into the hall. Looking at the paper, they were spread out from room 42-46. I decided I would start with room 44, I walked down as softly as I could. Trying not to give anyone a reason to look out in the hall. As I walked past room 42 I saw a hot pink thong hanging from the door handle.

I felt my heart sink a bit, I prayed like hell that it was anyone's room but Matt's. As I reached 44 I saw room 45's handle also had a pair of lady's intimates hanging from it. I lifted my hand and quickly made myself knock before I lost whatever bravery I had mustered.

Then I waited.

After a moment of no one answering I sighed. I raised my hand to try on final time, then I knew I was going to have to convince myself to pick from the remaining two doors.
My fist hovered inches from the door as the door to room 43 unlocked and opened behind me.
I stopped breathing.

"God help me." I whispered as I quickly shoved my hand into my pocket.

"Can I help you?" I spun around so fast I'm sure I did multiple rotations before actually stopped in front of Matt! "Carsea!" He looked past me and and the door behind me. "Replaced me with Jimmy already?" I blushed and smiled at him.

"I was looking for you." I replied softly. "The lobbyist didn't know who was in what room. I was playing a bit of a guessing game." He softly chuckled softly, and turned around pulling his room key out of his back pocket and unlocking his door.

He stepped inside and held the door open for me.

"Would you like to join me?"

"Weren't you just going some where?" I half protested as I stepped ever closer to his room, and him.

"I was just going for a walk. But I think I found a better way to waste time." He smirked at me as I moved the rest of the way into his room. Pressing myself against a wall so he could close the door, which he did promptly.

Notes

Finally I got it up!

Thank you to everyone who waited for this.

Its been forever so the links to her clothes, hair, and make up can be found below.

I'm wide awake right now so I'll probably start on the next chapter. Probably won't post it tonight however.

As always, let me know what you think, and if there is a grammar problem please!

Carsea's Outfit
& Make up