The Middle

*Zacky's P.O.V*
Sweats dripping down my forehead. The fear that I’ve always been afraid of actually happened. I never thought I would have to face this in my whole life ever. Victory had been the part of me since the day I was born and I always won after all these time - except when I play video games with Bri. I’m suck at some of the games, especially guitar hero. What kind of guitarist I am when I can’t even play that game? Damn.

But the thought of losing kept haunting me, even though I tried so hard to keep it away from my mind. Its like I’m an animal that got stuck on a trap, I couldn’t escape myself from it. There’s no other options for me than telling Brian the truth. He deserved to know about this. But I just don’t know how to say it to him. I tried to find the right words but it seemed like its so inappropriate. And with him staring curiously at me made me even more nervous than ever.

"Zack?" He said, snapping me out of my long trail of thoughts. "Are you gonna tell me or what? You’re wasting our time"

"Umm its Sarah.." I nervously said. "S-she’s… Umm.. Sh-"

"Goddammit spill it already, Baker!" He demanded.

"She’s going to win okay?!" I slightly screamed at him because he’s making me frustrated. "And we’re gonna lose because she told the police about us kidnapping Roxy. They wouldn’t believe me when I said I have something that is more important for them to know! I’ve tried as hard as I could but they still didn’t trust me!" I fumed. Letting all the fear flowed with my words and honestly, I feel relieved after I said it.

"What?! She told them?!" He said, just as loud as I was earlier.

"Oh are you deaf now?!" I blurted.

The tension between us heated up after I said that to him. What did you expect from me to say? I was frustrated and I said whatever the fuck that popped first in my mind. I didn’t think if the words that I was saying were going to hurt other people’s feeling when I’m on this state. I just say shit and probably gonna regret it later.

Brian was speaking in Spanish now, something he did when he was either frustrated or mad. Or maybe both because the feeling was so mixed up - I felt that too. And I couldn’t help but just sat there like a boy who got scolded by his father, I didn’t know what to do other than this. But then he started to speak in English again and unsurprisingly, he’s blaming me on this. At first, I play it cool. I knew my best friend so well when he was mad like this, he started blaming at people. You just gotta shut your mouth if you don’t want to start a fight. Besides, he’s probably gonna stop in 3…2…1… - Wait, what? He was still ranting and his words were getting more and more painful each time.

"This is all your fault, Zacky! If you tried slightly harder, they probably gonna let you show the evidence! And if we ended up in jail for doing this, I’m gonna blame it on you and tell you the same fucking shit every single day. Dammit you’re making me so frustrated!" He finished his words. That’s it. He’s really getting on my nerves and there’s no way that I’m gonna let him keep blaming me on such things.

I got up from my sitting possition. “Oh so you’re blaming it all on ME?!” I emphasized the word ‘me’. “Let me ask you some questions but don’t worry, you don’t need to answer it as its my time to talk now. First, who’s dragging me into this? YOU. Who’s gonna quit earlier? YOU again. Who’s willing to get this shit straight for his beloved best friend?! That’s right! ME. And this is what I got in return?? Well, thank you VERY much, Haner! I really appreciate that! Wow” I ranted, getting louder and louder with every words I said.

But instead of being guilty, he showed his lack of careness face. He knew that I get even annoyed if he did this and guess what? He succeeded. Its not just me who would get annoyed, I think everyone would. Brian was so stubborn. He thought he was the best on everything. He thought he was always right all of the time. Don’t get me wrong, I am used to this side of Brian but I just hate it when he’s being an asshole. I ran my hands through my hair then take a seat beside him.

He mumbled something but I could barely hear it. “What did you say?” I asked, still as mad as I was.

"I said, I’m sorry! Jeeez" he said.

"It doen’t sound like that. I think you said something like ‘yeah whatever’"

"You heard that then why did you ask me?! You fucking dumb”

“You better shut your goddamn mouth before my fist hit your face, Haner” I warned him.

“Come and hit me. I’m not afraid” he challenged me.

I glared at him with right fist already clenched. A part of my body really want to hit his face but the other tried to calm me down. Right now wasn’t the right time to fight with him. Its probably gonna make everything worse so I decided to remain silent. Sometimes silence is better.

“Now what? Playing silence game, Zacky?” he said in his rather softer voice.

“Why don’t you go inside and fix your problem yourself and leave me alone?” I offered.

“Fine” he stood up. “Give me that!” he roughly grabbed the evidence from my hand before he made his way inside the police station.

I let out a huge sigh. The things around me were making me weary. Its so complicated. At first, we just want to hang out every Sunday but then it turned out to be a complete disaster. What’s wrong from wanting to hang out with your bestest best friend in the world? I don’t think that ‘bestest’ is a right word but who gave a damn anyway. We really are close, we are like brothers.Then this lady appeared and decided to play some kind of shit game on us. Lets just say that it kinda tear me and Brian apart. And honestly, I don’t wanna lose him just because we had a tiny argument over this. I mean, nobody wants to lose their closest best friend right? That’d be wrong if we let them go. But he shouldn’t have to blame it all on me! The one who should be blamed of was Sarah and her alone. It was Sarah’s fault since the first time. Goddammit I wish he would’ve hear me when I say that she wasn’t the right person for him.

My head began aching from all of these thoughts. The pain caused me want to take a break for awhile. No, I don’t want it. I need it. ‘Maybe a little rest will help’ I thought before I closed my eyes. But not long after, I heard someone’s yelling and I quickly recognize that voice. Brian’s. I opened my eyes to two police officers dragging Brian out of the station then leave him.

“Well?” I questioned from my seat.

He turned his head to the voice source then walked to me whilst patting his chest with proud. “I did it! I did it!” he sang it in Dora’s voice.

I rolled my eyes at his childish behaviour before standing up and give him a man hug. He hugged me back which was surprising - I thought he was mad at me. But then I realized, our fights were always end up like this. Silly me for thinking that I’m gonna lose him.

“What was his reaction like?” I asked him as we pulled away.

“Well..” he put an arm on my shoulder. “He hasn’t see it yet but he promised me to do it later. He will contact us later. Lets celebrate this!” he grinned and I returned the gesture.

We walked to the nearest bar, trying to forget today’s drama with some hard liquor. Alcohol is our best friend and we knew we could always count on them to refresh our minds. But then I felt like something was wrong so I took a glance at him in the middle of the walk. His face expression had changed. It seemed like the excitement had left his body and it made him look down.

“What’s wrong man?” I asked him worriedly. He shot his head up and looked at me without any expressions on his face. Leaving all of my question unanswered.

Notes