Love Lost

{Zack’s POV}
A few weeks had passed since we found out about Gena’s pregnancy, I was still failing to cope with the stress and guilt over what happened with Meaghan. What was worse, was Matt was starting to get rather suspicious when me and Brian kept going off for private chats. I could never tell Matt though, he was so protective over Gena. He would throttle me, for sure.
Gena was very excited though, we had gone to the doctors and found out she was four months along. Of course, she wasn’t showing too much because she was naturally so skinny. Although, there was a slight round bump growing on her stomach.
I was happy… I was… I’m going to be a daddy is what I kept saying to myself. But at the same time, I’m a cheating father. That’s what I am. I tried blaming the alcohol, but it’s still my fault. Meaghan’s fault. Why do we have to have groupies? They all know we’re happily married and they still come round and try to seduce us. I can’t deal with groupies anymore. Every time we get a request, I come up with some bullshit about wanting to celebrate with the Avenged family, no outsiders. It usually works though.
Gena’s morning sickness had stopped, thank god. She was able to eat healthily now instead of throwing up everything that went down. At this moment, she was out with the girls… They had decided to go out for lunch and see a bit of Texas while we were out here. We had a show in Dallas the following night. Johnny and Matt had also gone out, god knows what they were up to. I didn’t bother listening when they had tried to tell us. It was just me, Brian and Arin sitting on the sofas. Arin was playing his video games, he had convinced Brian to join in too. I sat there and watched, not paying attention but at least I looked like I was doing something.
My phone began to ring all of a sudden, I raised my eyebrow when I didn’t recognise the number. I sighed and picked up the phone, answering it as Arin paused his game so it wouldn’t distract me.
“Hello?”
“Hey… Zack?”
I recognised the voice immediately, it was Meaghan. This was the last thing that I needed at the moment, I felt rage build up. More at myself than her.
“What, Meaghan?” This caught Brian’s attention, his head snapped to look at me which caused suspicion within Arin as he curiously watched on.
“I need to tell you something, and I don’t know how to say this… Zack, I’m pregnant.”
My heart dropped and shattered into a million pieces, I tried my hardest not to start crying at that moment as I began to take deep breaths. Arin and Brian stood up quickly, starting to get worried over my panic.
“I… You’re pregnant?” I had to repeat, just to be sure I had heard it right. Mistake. Arin put two and two together quickly, he realised what I had done and he walked off. Completely ignoring his game as he locked himself in his and Kim’s room. Brian was staring at me, his eyes just as wide as mine.
“Yes, Zack. I am. I’m going to be in Texas for your show tomorrow, I’ll see you there.”
She hung up the phone… She fucking hung up on me. I wanted to tell her not to come out, people would start to get suspicious. Oh god, what if Gena found out? I had not only got my wife pregnant… But I had also got the girl I cheated on her with pregnant too. This would be marriage over, and I couldnt face losing my whole world over one stupid night.
Brian was waving his hand in my face, I shook my head to clear my thoughts and looked at him. I broke down into tears, collapsing against his frame as I began experiencing a panic attack. He was trying to comfort and soothe me, even though he was still furious with me. We were practically brothers, he’d still always be there.
It took me a good twenty minutes to calm down, luckily I was just in time too.
The girls burst through the door, smiles all round as they began showing us all the photos they took while they were out on their adventure. All I could do was smile and nod, I could tell Gena noticed something was up but she’s the type to let me tell her when I’m ready. Except, I don’t think I would ever be ready to tell her something like this.


By 9pm, everyone was finally back on the bus from their busy days, I still had no clue where Johnny and Matt had been but they were absolutely hammered already. Val and Lacey had to put them to bed, although, they didn’t come back out afterwards so I assumed they were busy pleasing their men. Brian kept looking over at me, probably making sure I didn’t break down infront of everyone. Michelle was too busy talking on the phone to her best friend from back home, she was having a hard time without her after being with her almost every day. Gena was asleep in our room, she was starting to get tired quickly and her back had already began to hurt from the pregnancy so she seemed to be in bed quite early every day. Luckily, she was always too tired to have sex. Man, did I miss it… But I don’t think I would be able to handle that. What if I groaned Meaghan’s name? I mean, I didn’t have any feeling for Meaghan but I could easily have a flashback again.
Kim was sitting on the sofa, she was worried about Arin. He hadn’t come out of his room since the phone call earlier that day. He hadn’t even let Kim in when she came back on the bus, he had just locked himself away. I get why, secrets are stressful. This is his first time touring and I’ve already ruined that for him. We’d be lucky to get another tour out of him at that rate. But he loved everyone, he was thrilled when we asked him to become an official member so hopefully I hadn’t put him off.
He came out just as I was thinking, looking at me once… Then Brian, before holding his hand out to Kim. She happily took it, still concerned as she followed him back into the bedroom. I heard the door lock again and sighed loudly.
“She’s coming tomorrow.” I mumbled, trying not to let anyone hear me aside from Brian.
“What? Why would you let her do that?”
“I didn’t! She cut off on me before I could tell her not to, Brian.”
“What are we going to do? Gena’s going to find out, Zack.”
“I don’t know, Brian… I don’t know.”

Notes