Trying not to love you

So last night was incredibly weird. First I miss the guys' meet and greet for the first time ever, then I get into a fight with this random ass girl for bragging about how she gave Brian her number and that he kissed her. And then I got into a fight with Brian. And then he decides to kiss me and tell me that he loves me. He pissed me off so badly I actually punched him in his stupid fat face. I couldn't handle seeing him after that and I didn't feel like talking about it with Val or one of the guys so I spent the night with Tyson and his band last night. I'm on my way to the merch booth to help out Val. I hope I can put of a conversation with her about last night. And I hope Brian isn't hanging around there waiting for me to arrive. "Hey girly!" I said to Val as I walked behind the merch table. "Angelica! You're here! Finally!" Val said rushing up to me. "What the hell happened last night? Where did you go? Are you okay! I was worried when you didn't come back!" Val was so worried and shocked, she was shaking. "Okay slow down." I said trying to get Val to calm down. "What?" She said. "Chill out." I said. "I'm fine. I couldn't take seeing Brian anymore so I spent the night with Tyson and his crew." I told her. "Oh! Okay." Val said. I could here something was coming by the tone of her voice. "I know I forgot to page you that I was staying with Tyson, but I was so upset that all I wanted to do was sleep. I'm really, really sorry Val." I said, hoping that she would understand and forgive me. "Oh alright, I guess I can forgive you." She said. "Thank you!" I said and then Val handed me the bag of demo's "You take the first shift." Val said. I still have to pay my debt from the other night, but I feel this is also punishment for not paging her last night. I took the bag and headed out into the crowds. ••••••• I had been walking around for about 20 minutes and the sun was really bareing down on me. I was sweating so bad so I decided to take a little break and get some water. "Can I get a water please?" I said to the vendor. I put a dollar down on the table and looked out to the crowd. "Make it two please." A voice from behind me said. I knew exactly who it was. I turned and there stood Brian. Smiling at me with that stupid grin on his face. I could see a tiny cut on his lip, where I hit him. I narrowed my eyes at him and didn't say a word. The guy put the two water bottles on the table for Brian and I and I took mine and walked away from Brian. "Angelica." Brian said. I stayed quiet and kept on walking. "Please don't walk away again!" Brian said running up to me. I tried to speed up and lose him but he kept up with me. "Would you please just let me explain?" Brian said and cut me off and put his hands on the sides of my arms. I stopped walking but I didn't look at him. He let go of me and started talking. "God you're so beautiful." Brian said looking at me. "Ugh! Cut the crap Brian! You said you wanted to talk, so talk. I have things to do you know." I said getting annoyed with him. Before, if he had said that to me I probably would have melted, but right now it's just making me sick. "Okay, okay. I'm sorry." Brian said. "Okay. Last night didn't go the way I planned. You were supposed to comeback to the van so I could talk to you about something that I've been wanting to talk to you about for awhile now. But then when I saw that you were hurt, I lost it. I just freaked out and everything got out of hand. I shouldn't have shoved Tyson like that and I shouldn't have dropped that huge bomb on you like that. I just felt that I was losing you and that I needed to do something to keep you here with Val and the guys. To keep you here with me. Will you please forgive me?" Brian said. Okay so this is kind of melting the anger I had built up towards Brian, but I'm not gonna let him know this. I stood there with my arms still crossed, showing no emotion. "Please say something." Brian pleaded. What do I say? I can't just say 'Oh that's okay Brian. I forgive you.' Brian was in the wrong and I can't just let him off the hook because he sought me out just to apologize to me. "Please just say something. Anything." Brian said "What do want me to say? That I understand why you acted the way you did last night. Because I don't. You had no right to push Tyson like that! You had not right to talk to him like that! You had no right talking to me like that! And you had absolutely no fucking right kissing me without my permission and then telling me that you love me! So my answer is, not only no, but fuck no, I don't forgive you!" I yelled at Brian. I threw my water in his face and stormed off. Who the fuck does he think he is?! If he thinks that just because he went out of his way to come and apologize to me in person will make me forgive him, then he's got another thing coming. I couldn't take it anymore. I had to get out of here. I made my way through th crowds with tears falling from my eyes. I wasn't crying. I was just so upset that the tears just fell. I was trying to get back to the merch booth to tell Val that I needed a break. I finally reached Val and as soon as she saw me she stopped what she was doing and through her arms around me. "Oh my god, Angelica! Are you okay?!" She asked. "I need a break." Was all that I got out. "Okay. I'm gonna go get you some water and you just sit here and try to relax." She said. "No." I said and then I felt the tears fall faster and now I was really crying. "What? Angelica you need some water. You'll feel much better." Val stopped and looked back at me. "No Val. That's not what I meant. That's not what I meant at all." I said wiping my eyes. "Okay then what did you mean?" Val asked. She brought herself down to meet me at eye level. I took in a deep breath, then let it out and said "I need a break from Brian."

~foREVer~

Notes

Sorry its been awhile. My Internet has been acting up so bad.
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