Brian's Letters To Matthew

“He… he left him.”

Zacky’s hands, gripping the journal, were shaking.
“Baby I told you,” said Jimmy, “We may be like them but one thing is for sure and that is I’m not leaving. I love you too damn much.”
“I know,” said Zacky, “It’s just that… that… how could Matthew fall out of love?!”
Zacky jumps to his feet, “Brian loved him with all his heart! He did nothing but love Matthew and make Matthew happy and Matthew just leaves! What an asshole! What a dick! That man be a dad?! Bullshit! Fucken bullshit!”
Jimmy grabs Zacky in his arms. The others startled by Zacky’s outburst.
“Deep breaths Baby,” Jimmy coos, “Deep breaths.”
“How could someone do that?” Zacky asks as he hugs Jimmy.
“I don’t know,” Jimmy answers, “Maybe the journal will hold the answers.”
Zacky nods as he calms down, “Yeah. I’m good now.”
Zacky sits back down, “I think you should read this time Jimmy… I just can’t.”
Jimmy sits beside Zacky and takes the journal.

---x---

Dear Matthew,

I haven’t felt well beside how I felt with you done. I fought through it during the last few months of the school. The reason for this? After a month after you left I found out I was pregnant, which I’ve mentioned in a previous letter. I wasn’t going to tell everybody I was impregnated, the school thought I was a freak without that knowledge. After that school year, Mama Suzy and Dad had me homeschooled, which I’m grateful for.

I remember finding out about our child. Staring at the pregnancy test, I couldn’t believe that I was pregnant with a child… our child. I was so freaked out, I cried myself to sleep. Saying I was scared is an understatement. You were gone, how would I raise our child by myself? I knew one thing for sure, I wasn’t going to get rid of it. As much as I wasn’t ready to take care of a child, I couldn’t destroy the life it could have. I spent most my time rubbing my stomach, trying to figure out what will happen to the baby growing inside of me.

I didn’t really get morning sickness during my first trimester. I took many many naps, I was always tired. If I wasn’t tired, I was hungry. Not really strong cravings, but it was a lot of comfort food. Of course Mama Suzy helped me make sure I ate healthy food too. Healthy food for a healthy baby. If I remember correctly, our child loved it when I ate tacos.

I remember they were your favorite food… I guess he takes after his father.

With all my love,

Brian

Notes

I wonder why Zacky made an outburst....