Sierra's POV

I woke up next to a sleeping , and peacefull - looking Brian . His strong arms were wrapped around my waist , and I couldn't stop the sudden increase in my heartbeat the moment I realised that . It really felt good laying right there , in his arms ... It felt like it was just the way it was supposed to be .

But then a thought made its way to my mind , and suddenly everything seemed to go downhill for me ...


Brian is married

Of course ! How could I possibly forget that ?!? Brian is married , he still is and he never stopped . So what was I doing here , to him ? What was I doing to myself by thinking that he can possibly have feelings for me ? And Jason's words came in my head again ...

.. '' He's not going to give up his everything for you...He's not going to change his life for you...He doesn't feel anything about you,and he never will...He's simply a womanizer,Sierra,and he loves it that girls all over the world believe that he's any diferrent.. ''

Jason was right back then . I just keep making up this fairytale in my head , and force myself into believing my own lies .

So , on those thoughts , I managed to get out of the bunk without waking Brian up , and headed straight towards the bathroom . Thank God it was still only 6.30 in the morning , and not one of the guys is a morning person , especially on a day that no soundcheck is needed .

I tried to make myself look decent , and then got out , searching for something to wear . As I was rummaging through every single piece of clothing on the floor , I raised my head and saw Brian wide awake , looking over me .

'' Need any help there ? '' he asked quietly , smiling a bit while doing so ..

'' No , thanks , I've got it ... '' I replied , forcing a fake , faint smile on my lips , as I stood up again ...

'' Uh ... Is there something wrong ? '' he asked again , still not moving his eyes from mine . How the heck could he read me like that ?

'' No , ofcourse nothing is wrong ... '' I said , holding on to the shirt I had managed to dig out of the mess on the floor . Damn , somebody needs to clean up this place for good ... I thought to myself , but Brian interrupted my thoughts again ..

'' Well , then why did you leave without waking me up first ... ? Like you didn't even want me to lay with you anymore ... '' he whispered , now getting closer to me ..

'' Brian , please , you should already know why ... '' I muttered in response ...

'' Why ? ... Tell me because obviously I have no clue ... '' he replied , and tried catching my hands in his , but I moved them away ..

'' You are married ... '' I said , and looked down .. '' And this whole thing probably means nothing to you anyways .. But it affects ME , Brian .. and I just can't do it ... '' I continued and looked up , only to meet his sad orbs ...

'' You know it's not like that , Sierra .... '' he tried to say something , but I cut him off ..

'' It's exactly like that , Brian ... And you know it ... So leave , before we wake everybody up ... ''
I said , and went in the bathroom again , locking the door behind me ...

I heard footsteps towards the door , and Brian's hand reaching fot the doornob , before walking away , opening the main door and slamming it shut behind him ....

It hurt me inside to know that probably everything meant nothing to him , that I was just a game for him ... But I guess I just have to let it go ..

Brian's POV

I just couldn't understand anything ! I woke up in her bunk only to find her missing . At first I thought it was all just a dream , but then I remembered it really happened , and it was truly one of the most amazing nights in my life . Just holding her in my arms , letting her know that nothing could hurt her as long as I was around , feeling her breath against my skin ...

Everything was exactly like in one of those girly - romantic movies that everyone deep inside loves to watch ...

And then , when I finally manage to spot her , beautiful as ever even without a single drop of make - up on her face , she turns her back on me ...
She hesitates ....

And here I am now , fully awake in the silent bus of ours , not knowing what to do . I decided to head to my bunk , in hopes of getting some sleep .

But , of course , I found Michelle there ... I couldn't even remember when she'd come to visit
us , or why she still was here .

Letting out a silent sigh , I make my way next to her , and her hands immediately find their way over my chest .

So I just laid there , thinking how wrong it felt when I had Michelle in my arms , and how awefully right it felt when I had Sierra..

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxFF to the Eveningxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Sierra's POV

All day , I couldn't forget about Brian . My mind was stuck on him . I couldn't forget that look in his eyes , that look of absolut hurt and sadness . But again , maybe I was just imagining things that weren't there .

Thank God the tour was coming to a break , basically after a week we'd get to go home and rest for a while , because then we had to face 4 months of constant touring .
So all the bands decided to go to a bar , to celebrate , I guess , even though I didn't feel like celebrating anything .

When we reached the place , I spotted the a7x guys sitting around a table , and Brian had his arms wrapped around his wife . Even though his eyes held a void expression , he still kept his arms around her .

I sighed , and whispered in my head to move and find a place to sit . As we passed the a7x's table , Brian locked his eyes with mine , and immediately moved Michelle's arm away from him ...

I just turned the other way , and sat down on our table , that was placed ,conviniently enough , right across the a7x's table . GREAT ! Now I'd be forced to look at Brian and his lovely -wife all night long ...

So I was just sitting there , mindind my own business and trying to not look at Brian , when a guy came and sat right beside me .

'' Hey there ... '' he said , his green eyes locking with my brown .

'' Hello '' I smiled to him . He really looked cute , had long black hair , full lips and perfect arms .. You know the kind of arms you just die for them to hug you .

'' Excuse me for not introducing myself , I'm Ben ... '' he said with a smile . God did he have a perfect smile ...

'' Well nice to meet you , Ben ... I'm Sierra '' I replied

'' I know your name , I know you and your band ... You guys kick some serious ass ! Really I love your tunes and everything .. '' he smiled . Right then '' Hold Tight '' blasted out , and he
said to me ..

'' Now , would a metal godess like yourself be graceful enough to accept a dance invitation from a mortal lawyer like myself ? '' he smiled again , and I simply nodded , holding on the smile on my face as he grabbed my arm and took me to the center of the bar ...

We kept on dancing like there was no tomorrow , and I must admitt that it felt good , made me forget about everything for a while . The song changed to a rock cover of Katy Perry's Teenage Dream , and Ben moved his body closer to mine . I felt his hands resting on my hips , and didn't even understand when he decided to spin me around and crush his lips on mine . And , boy , didn't that feel good . Especially when I opened my eyes and spotted that familiar pair of brown eyes staring at me filled with fuming wrath .

Is that jealousy , Mr Gates ?

Brian's POV

I watched as a random douchebag walked over to HER table , and started talking to her . I saw the way she smiled at him , the way he grabbed her arm and started dancing with her . And to say I felt jealous would be an understatement .

But , when that faggot spun her around and started kissing her , I felt pure anger , pure wrath taking over my whole body and mind . He didn't have the right to do that , he couldn't be kissing MY Sierra ... Yes I just called her Mine , cause she is ... I need her , and she is there kissing some douche she met only minutes ago .

They kept on kissing , and I couldn't take it anymore . I stormed out of the bar , and leaned against the wall behind me . And right then I felt it ... It was getting difficult for me to breath , I felt the need to throw up , a whole bunch of emotions were slowly overtaking me ...

I felt my heart break

Sierra's POV

I saw Brian standing up and leaving . Normally , a logical person should have just ignored that and continued on dancing/kissing/dry-humping that eye-candy right in front of me .
However , me being me , I excused myself from Ben , and went outside too .

I spotted him leaning against a wall , holding his head in his hands and breathing sharply .
I will not lie , now , I was angry too . He didn't have the right to make me feel that way for him . He shouldn't have that power over me . He was married for God's sake, couldn't he understand how much THAT was hurting me ?

So , I went closer to him , and said ..

'' You know you shouldn't react that way when shit happens ... '' ..

He raised his head , and I saw that his eyes were starting to turn into a slightly pink colour ,
his eyeliner was already smudged all over his cheeks , and his mouth was slightly open ... He was crying , clearly crying and I couldn't help but feel a part of me break in that sight ...

Brian's POV
She came to me , like I hoped she would ... I heard her voice , and I could tell she was upset ..

'' You know you shouldn't react that way when shit happens ... '' , and I raised my head in order to see her face , but also to let her know how I was because of her . I wasn't ashamed of her seeing my face in that condition , I didn't care about the fact that I looked like an emo - fucking- Oompa Loopa , cause I knew that that didn't matter to her , she had already seen a small part of the broken frame of mine , the shattered version of the famous '' Synyster Gates '' ... I wasn't going to hide anything from her ..

I tried to regulate my breathing so I could talk , and stop the tears from falling ..

'' Don't .... y- you get it... ? D-Don't y-y-you get it that you are hurting me ? '' I managed to say through sniffles and ragged breathing .

I locked my eyes with her brown orbs and continued ...

'' I 've never lied to you , Sierra ... When I'm around you I feel like I'm in heaven , like nothing can go wrong ... When you are away , I feel a part of me just vanishing ... and when another guy as much as touches your hand I feel my whole world crush-..'' and she cut me ...

'' And HOW do you think I FEEL , when I see you with your wife ? When I see you holding hands , when I know that no matter what happens between us you are still married to another woman ? When I watch you kiss her , hug her , and I feel like I'm only making all these stories in my HEAD? Tell me , Brian , how do you think I feel when I 'm not sure about a godamn thing about us ? '' she said in an angry tone , the tears now making their way on her face too ..

'' ...Don't cry . Please , I hate to see you cry ... '' I said, and reached over with my hand to her cheek in order to wipe away her tears , only for her to slam it away .

'' I ' ll do whatever I want ..! Do you think I like this ? This thing , Brian , is not only hurting you , it's hurting me too .. More than you can imagine ... and I don't know what to do ... '' she added , and let her head hung low ...

We sat there in silence , not one of us even saying a word .... But then she spoke again ..

'' Are you ever going to leave her... ? '' she asked , and I just stared at her ...

'' Honestly , I don't know ... It's not just what you see , Sierra , there's much more ... It's not like I'm still married to her only because of her ... It's much more complicated than you think ... '' I said looking at her , but the moment she heard my response she turned the other way ..

'' Okay .. then , there's nothing else to say ...'' she started walking away ..

'' Wait ,Sierra ... Please don't walk away ... Not now ... '' I started , but she had already
disappeared in the club ..

'' I'm in love with you ... '' I said to noone , and I leaned back against the wall once more ...

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxNext Eveningxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Sierra's POV

We had finished our setlist about hours ago , and the gig was simply amazing . Of course I was still affected by the whole incident with Brian , though I was happy I hadn't seen him at all during the whole day ... I don't think I'd be able to face him and his wife sucking off each other's faces even for a single second .

It was raining outside , and all the others decided to stay in the bus and watch a movie or something . I , though , happen to be a massive fan of the rain , so I put on my hoodie and got out of the bus , deciding to take a small walk out in the rain . Rain always had this power to relax my nerves and calm my spirits .

However , the moment I decided to walk out , I was met with a soaking wet Brian , who was shivering intensively ...

'' Well , I 've b-been w-a-iting all these hours for you to show up ... '' he started , slightly smiling at me ...

'' How did you know I'd even be willing to go out in the rain ? '' I asked , not so much him , but whatever God exists up there..

'' I remember you telling me how the rain is , basically , the love of your life and all ... '' he replied , and I simply nodded , not knowing what else to do ...

'' Any-yways ... I need to tell you something ... '' he said and stepped closer to me , but I cut him off .. We were both standing in the rain by now ..

'' No, Brian , we talked about that already ... There's nothing going on between us ... '' I started , but now was his turn to cut me off , as he smiled and put a finger over my lips ..

'' I broke up with Michelle .... Sierra ... I-I-I 'm ... '' he started but the shivering got the best of him ... So he took a deep breath and looked straight in my eyes ..

'' I'm in love with you , Sierra ...'' , he said , and I felt my insides burn as he crushed his lips on mine ....

And boy did I want this kiss to last forever ...