Fate Exposed

We sat and waited in that tiny waiting room for hours. And then some.

Around five at night Jimmy asked if anyone wanted to go to the cafeteria with him. Everyone shrugged their shoulders, but I offered to go. Anything to get me out of that room and my mind thinking about something else. My anxiety was through the roof right now.

The walk down to the cafeteria was quiet. I only bought a water; my stomach had been in a knot all day so eating anything right now would be a huge mistake. Jimmy bought a Pepsi. We sat at a table in the far end of the room which was a good distance away from the people who were in the room.

"So Matt's injuries really aren't that bad?" Jimmy said abruptly.

"It was a head on car collision, relatively they're not bad," I replied.

"What did the doctor say exactly."

"Matt has a concussion. He has scrapes all over his body. He has a laceration on his left abdomen. He has a dislocated shoulder but fortunately he has no broken bones," I said repeating what Dr. Mellor had said.

"A dislocated shoulder?" Jimmy repeated, and half asked a question.

"Yeah, the doctor said it's not as bad as it sounds. I've actually dislocated my shoulder, if was from being in the car crash" I sighed.

"So that's all?" Jimmy asked.

"Basically, the only other thing the doctor mentioned was how this will effect Matt mentally." I added.

"Right" He nodded his head.

I nodded mine in reply as I sipped my water.

"Thank you, by the way, I just really needed to know what actually happened. Matt's my best friend and I hate seeing him hurt, ya know?"

I nodded my head, "It's nothing, you obviously deserve to know. It helps knowing, at the same time it doesn't, but knowing that Matt's most serious injury is the concussion gives me some hope."

Jimmy nodded his head in agreement. We sat in silence. I sipped my water. Jimmy sipped his Pepsi. This minutes slowly went by.

"I know this may come out sounding way more shallow than it should but there was a song that I really wanted Matt to read," Jimmy said with an underlying tone of laughter.

I smiled, "I'm sure he will be able to when he wakes up," then another idea hit me, "if you want, I could read the song. Among the many thing I wanted to major in, in college, English was one of my top choices.

"If I had the song on me I'd gladly let you read it!" Jimmy said excitedly, "I didn't know that, so do you write?"

"I write a little. I enjoy writing creatively, analytically, poetically, basically everything." I chuckled.

"That's so awesome Morgan! I've always loved writing, poetry specifically. Writing is pretty great, it's like a way to let your mind run free."

"That's exactly why I write. I always use to have an appriceation for it but then after my parents passed I had a whole new appriceation for it. It saved me. I started keeping a diary. I started reading more. It was great; it still is great." I mused.

"So is that what you're majoring in?" He asked.

I shrugged my shoulders, "I have no idea. I've thought about it but I know it's not the most rewarding field unless you make it big. I've also thought about majoring in something like psychology"

"Morgan, sometimes it's not about whether something is going to get you money; it's about happiness. You've had a lot of upset in your life, you deserve to do something that's going to bring you joy and satisfaction for the rest of your life." He advised.

"I know, that's all very true. I've just come to accept the fact that life isn't about happiness, and I'm going to do what I can to make a living," I sighed.

"You're wrong. I use to think the same thing as you. In high school if it wasn't for the guys, I know I wouldn't be here. I didn't even live at home. I lived in the laundromat that I worked at and abandoned buildings. I saw first hand that life wasn't about happiness but I always had music. Music made me happy, as did being in a band and I knew that's all I wanted to do for the rest of my life and that's all I am doing" Jimmy put forth.

"Thank you" I said softly, "it's definetly something that I'll be thinking about"

"Good. I just want you to be happy, you deserve it"

I smiled.

I sipped my water until it was gone and I got up to throw the bottle away. When I looked at the clock I noticed that only thirty minutes had gone by which seemed impossible. Time moves very slowly in hospital and when you're nervous as hell.

"So what's the song about that you want Matt to read?" I asked as I sat down.

"My life."

"Oh cool"

"My life is kind of like a story, if I told you, or anyone for that matter, they probably wouldn't believe it. It's like fiction. That's the whole theme of the song."

"That's actually really cool"

Jimmy smiled, which made me smile.

"So do you think Matt's up yet?" He asked.

"I don't know. It wouldn't hurt to go up and see" I shrugged.

We both walked to the ICU. Part of me wanted Matt to be awake so that I could go and see him. Another part of me didn't want him to be awake; I still needed time to process all that's happened. My mind is weird. As is life.

"Any news?" Jimmy asked the guys as we walked into the sitting area.

"Nope" Zacky sighed.

"You guys didn't bring us any food?" Brian teased.

"If we had known we would have" Jimmy replied.

"We can go get you some," I offered.

"Nah, I'm just kidding. I don't think I can eat anything right now." Brian said.

We all nodded our heads.

I walked over to the empty seat next to Brian. He put his arm around me, and I rested my head on his shoulder. I closed my eyes, desperately wanting to sleep but whenever I closed them I imagined the car accident. I imagined the car accident I was in. Then I imagined the car accident Matt was in. Then it repeated. My parents screams played in my head over and over. I imagined Matt's screams. I was in agony.

After what seemed like hours but was probably only two minutes; I heard a doctor walk through the double doors in front of us. I sat up and watched, as did everyone else.

"I have some news for you all," he said to us.

We all eagerly and anxiously anticipated what he was about to say.

Notes

yay an update :)