Days passed and I avoided any contact with the guys. Sarah didn't really come around either. I think her and Johnny had something going on, but I wasn't for sure.

Finally, after three days of not seeing or hearing from Sarah, she came over. I was sitting on my couch eating a bowl of mint chocolate chip ice cream watching Jacobs Ladder when I heard a knock come from the door. I got up and opened it.

"Lex I'm so sorry I haven't been over," Sarah said barging in.

"It's okay," I said laughing. She looked at me confused.

"What aren't you depressed," she asked. "Brian totally betrayed you again," she said. I shrugged my shoulders.

"Eh I guess you could say that," I said walking back over to my couch and sitting down.

"Wait what do you mean," she asked confused.

I looked at her. "Sarah I'm done that's all there is to it. I mean I'll hang out with everyone but I won’t speak to him. I'm done with my childish games and I'm done with his," I said.

She smiled at me. "I'm glad you finally came out of your shell," she said sitting down. I nodded taking a bite of my ice cream and getting back into my movie.

My phone started to ring. I picked it up and looked at the caller I.D. and an unknown number read back to me.

"Hello," I answered.

"Hey Lex," he said.

"Zack? How'd you get my number," I asked.

"Brian," he said.

"Oh," I said. There was a moment of silence.

"What'd you need," I asked.

"Um I'm gonna come over if that's okay," he said.

"Yeah that's fine Sarah's here too so go ahead," I told him.

"Okay I'll be over in a bit," he said hanging up. I press end call and set my phone on the table.

"Zack's coming over," I told Sarah.

She smiled. "That's good," she said laughing.

I shrugged. "Yeah I guess so," I said laughing.

She looked at me. "Why you guess," she asked.

"I don't know. He always nags me about Brian when I see him," I told her.

"I don't think he's going to this time," she said.

"How do you know," I asked.

"I don't know I just do," she said standing up.

"Where you going," I asked.

"Aaron wants me at his bar tonight," she said.

"Wait so you're leaving me alone with him," I said.

She nodded. "It'll be a good Lex. It's not like he's a stranger," she said laughing and opening the door. "I'll stop by after I'm done," she said. She gave me a small grin and walked out.

About ten minutes later Zack was here. I tried to look the best I could. I don't know why I was trying to impress him or why I was nervous that he was coming over. Maybe it was because the way Sarah was acting. Maybe something is going on that I don't know about.

-----

I laid there in bed not wanting to move. My heart ache and I wasn't in any mood to deal with anyone's shit. My phone started to ring and I answered it without even looking at the number.

"Hello," I said.

"Bro what are you doing," Matt's voice asked from the other end of the phone.

"Laying in bed," I told him.

"I'm coming over. Get ready we're going out," he told me hanging up before I could refuse. I really didn't wanna get out. I was terrified of seeing Lex again with the same face she gave me the other day. I know eventually I would have to face her again but I don't know when. I rolled out of bed and took a quick shower. I made myself look as nice as I could before Matt got here.

"Let's go dude," he yelled from downstairs. I grabbed my jacket and phone and we headed out. "We're going to Aaron's," he said.

"I figured," I told him.

"Don't worry Lex isn't gonna be there," he told me.

I looked at him. "How do you know she's been going there often lately," I told him.

"Zack is over there," he said. For some odd reason jealousy shot through my veins. I shot a look at Matt.

"Why is he over there," I snapped.

"He's just gonna hang out with her bro calm down," he said laughing. I tried to calm down but I couldn't.

"How am I supposed to fucking calm down Matt," I yelled.

"Whoa dude okay I was just trying to get you out of the house. The only way I could make sure she wouldn't be there is if he went over there," he told me.

"Why not Jimmy," I asked him.

"He's busy with something," he said.

I sighed. "Alright."

We pulled in the bar parking lot and got out. We walked in and saw Aaron and Sarah sitting at a table. We walked up to them.

"Hey look who's finally out of his cave," Aaron said jokingly.

I shot a look at him. "Shut the fuck up," I snapped.

"Sarah why are you here," Matt asked.

She shrugged her shoulders. "Just wanted to come have a drink I guess," she said. I could feel like something was going on but I just didn't know what it was. Maybe I'm just paranoid or maybe it's reality.

-----

"Hey Zack," I said giving him a hug.

"Hey," he smiled happily returning the hug. We walked in and sat down on the couch.

"Sorry it was such a short notice," he said laughing.

"Na it's all good I wouldn't mind hanging out with you if it was two in the morning," I said smiling. We had many conversations about multiple things. First we talked about how he was doing and then we moved into his guitar, music and what's happened in the past few years.

"Hey Zee do you want a beer," I asked him.

He looked at me. "Damn no one has called me that in years," he said laughing.

"Well I pretty much was the only one that called you it," I said standing up and walking into the kitchen and grabbing two Heineken’s and going back and sitting on the couch. I cracked open the beer and took a big gulp. I laid back in the couch. I sighed. Zack looked at me.

"Whatcha thinking about," he asked.

I smiled. "Oh nothing," I said. I was really thinking about this feeling I had. I didn't know what it meant.

"Well I hope it's not Brian," he said. I was completely shocked that he said that. Normally he was the one always telling me to forgive him and shit and now here is telling me this.

"Whoa where did that come from," I said laughing. He shrugged his shoulders. "Zee I'm not thinking about Brian," I told him sitting up.

"Good," he said looking at me. I think that was the first time in knowing him for years I noticed how beautiful his eyes were. I smiled. "Why are you so worried about it," I asked. "Normally you're begging me to take him back," I said laughing.

"I only did that because I thought that was what you wanted," he said. "The moment you finally took him back I saw in your eyes that you weren't totally sure that was what you wanted," he told me.

"I really wanted it at the time, honestly, but just knowing that Michelle was still in his house crushed me to the point I don't want anything further than a relationship with him,” I told him.

He nodded. "I honestly think that would be best for you guys," he told me taking a drink of his beer.

I nodded. "I do too," I said. I was telling myself that, but I just still couldn’t accept it.

I stood up and grabbed my bottle. "You want another," I asked him. He nodded. I went got two more beers and sat back down. "Zee I want you to know something," I told him. He looked at me straight in the eyes.

"What's that," he asked.

"When I left Brian I didn't leave you guys," I said.

He nodded. "I know," he said. "We couldn't go look for you or anything without Brian though because he would've fucked everything up," he told me.

"I know I just wanted to make that clear. I love you guys, including Brian, it's just this is a big mess. We're all just meant to be friends and have a good time," I told him.

"Well did you know Sarah's with Johnny," he said quickly changing subjects.

My eyes widened. "What since when," I asked.

"Oh for only about a week," he said.

"I thought something was going on," I said laughing.

I looked over at the clock. It was already getting close to nine o'clock. I had work tomorrow for once. I found a job at a local shop. I know I didn't mention this before but I'm a tattoo artist. It's been my little secret. Even Sarah doesn't know I finally found an apprenticeship.

"Zee," I said.

He looked at me. "Yeah," he said.

"It's getting close to nine," I said laughing. “I got work tomorrow," I told him. He started to laugh.

"Oh Lex you're fucking hilarious," he said.

I looked at him. "What do you mean," I asked laughing.

"Only you would go to bed at nine for work in the morning," he said. "Where do you work anyway," he asked.

"Just at a shop," I said hoping he wouldn't ask anymore.

"Okay well what kind of shop," he asked.

"Tattoo," I mumbled under my breath. He shot a look at me and had a huge grin on his face.

“No fucking way," he said. I nodded. "That's fucking awesome. What shop is it? I'm totally getting a tat done by you," he said cheerfully.

"It's Sinister Body Graphics," I told him.

His face lit up. "I'm so excited," he said. I hid my face. I don't know why I was so embarrassed but I was.

"Well I guess I'll let you go to bed then," he said laughing. I looked at him and smiled.

"Thank you for spending pretty much the whole day with me," I told him standing up.

"I had a hell lot of fun we should do it again," he said smiling. I walked him out to his car. He got in and I stood in front of the door. He smiled at me.

"I love you Zee," I said.

"I love you too Lex," he said laughing. I turned around and walked away.

"I'll see you tomorrow," he said smiling. I quickly turned around.

"You're not coming in tomorrow to get a tat done are you," I asked him.

"No," he said laughing.

"What time do you get off? I'll pick you up and we'll go out for a drink or something," he said.

"Oh," I said laughing. "I get off at eight," I told him.

He nodded. "I'll see you then," he yelled out pulling out of the driveway. I waved and walked back inside.