We stood outside in the cold, neither of us moving, just holding each other. For whatever reason I could not stop crying, perhaps it was the fact that I saw him sleeping with someone else, or maybe it was just that I was finally letting out everything I had been feeling in these last days, or was it weeks? I had completely lost track of time, I had no idea how long it had been.

“Come on, you’re shivering, let’s go inside.” He suggested, finally pulling me away from my one thought, sadness. I didn’t say a word as he led me back out of the forest and into the house; we went all the way upstairs and straight to his room. When I got inside, he went towards the bathroom, but turned around when he saw that I wasn’t following him.

I stared around the room uncomfortably, noticing the little things; clothes were strewn across the room, a pair of pants, a shirt and a little yellow thong; the bed was a mess, blankets wrinkled and the comforter was kicked down by the head board; right beside the door was a picture that was dangerously close the falling off its’ hook, which lead me to believe that that is where he pressed her up against the wall. All these little things drove me mad, making the tears spring back into my eyes. Fuck, why was I so god damn emotional?

“What’s wrong?” he asked me softly, taking a few steps towards me.

“Please, just let me go to my room, please just leave me alone.” I sputtered, chin shaking, tears falling down my face.

“Fine, just go,” he sighed, clearly annoyed. I backed away before turning on my heel and practically running down the hall into the room I called mine. It was just like I remembered it, not different from the day I knocked Shadows out and jumped out the window, though now there were a few alterations, bars on the window making sure no one could get out, Isn’t that a fire hazard? and a few extra locks on the outside of my door. Not that any of this surprised me, I’m surprised that I’m even allowed to stay here; I’m surprised I actually have a door.

I trudged through the doorway, immediately closing it behind myself, locking the door to make sure I didn’t get any unwanted visitors, not that they didn’t have a key, I’m sure they could get in if they really wanted to. I then shuffled into the bathroom, turning on the water as hot as it would go, steam quickly filled the room. When I saw that the mirror had fogged up completely, I striped of my clothes, I was not in the mood of seeing my disgusting body. I stepped into the scalding, flinching when I felt how hot it was, though I still didn’t turn it down, I wanted to burn all the touches away. I wanted to burn Zacky’s kisses off of my skin, I wanted to burn the feeling of his lips away from my most sensitive area, and I especially wanted to burn the sensation of him pumping in and out of me. I could hardly stand how disgusted I was with myself. I hated that I let these men affect me so extremely, I hated that I let one of them have sex with me, my first really time having sex, I hated that I was falling in love with one of these monsters, I could feel my self- loathing beginning to boil as I thought of all the things I was doing wrong. I deserved to be punished. I didn’t deserve anything, I deserved pain.

I was so distracted that I hadn’t even realised I had cut my leg shaving, I wasn’t even aware I had been shaving. When I looked down to the slight stinging sensation, I saw that beautiful red liquid leaking from the wound; I couldn’t help but smile at the beauty of it. I couldn’t help what I did next, I wanted to see more of this beauty, and this is what made me beautiful, this beauty running through my veins, just beneath the surface. I brought the razor up to my wrist and held it to the skin, admiring how cool and lovely it felt. As I slid it across the sensitive flesh, I admired the spring of colour against the pale contrast of my flesh. I watched the blood trail onto my fingers and slowly drop to the shower floor, turning the water a pale pink. I stuck my wrist under the boiling water and winced at the stinging sensation, but it was not enough for me to pull it away, this feeling was addicting. It made me forget all of the things I was doing wrong. It made me focus on what I was doing right at this moment, it made me focus on how right this felt, and I craved more of this feeling. I washed the blood from the razor and brought it down on my skin once more, and again and again, until I had a steady row of bright red, bleeding, beautiful cuts all along the inside of my wrist.

I watched mesmerized until I realized just how exhausted I was, I reluctantly turn off the shower and stepped out, wrapping myself in a fluffy purple towel. When I wiped off the mirror, I realized just how hot that shower was, my entire body was a violent shade of pink, still radiating heat. I quickly dried myself off and dropped the towel, knowing no one else was in the room, and feeling safe enough to walk to the closet naked. When I got to the closet, I forgot where everything was, I hadn’t been here in so long. Though I opened up the first two drawers and found the underwear I knew had to be here somewhere. I grabbed the least revealing pair I could find and slid them up my legs; I then found a baggy shirt and shorts to wear to bed. I then crawled into bed and cried a little more, I cried until I could no longer hold my eyes open and until I drifted into a nightmare filled sleep.

I awoke with a start the next morning; I sat upright in bed and realized how hot I felt. There was sweat on my body, hair sticking to my skin and my heart was pounding. I was panting, my chest rising and falling heavily, as I looked around the room and felt a cold breeze blow across my skin, immediately raising goose bumps. I whipped my head across the room and saw that sure enough, my window was open, though it wasn’t opened last night...

I frantically hopped out of bed and ran over to my closet, grabbing a sweater and searching every hiding place that could hide a full grown man. After finding nothing, I slipped the sweater over my head and ventured out, but when I went to search the bathroom, a chilling voice stopped me in my tracks.

“You know, you confuse me, kitty.” Chills ran up and down my spine as I heard him get off the bed and walk over to me. He was mostly likely the last person I wanted to see right now. When he was close enough, he brushed my hair to one side and gently kissed the base of my neck. I could hardly breathe at how nervous he was making me. I felt his plump lips press against my neck over and over again as he wrapped his arms around my stomach. “What? You don’t like this? You don’t like it when I kiss your neck?” He questioned me, bringing his mouth up to my ear and running his tongue along the edge of it.

“P- Please, just le- leave me alone. I don’t want any of th- this.” I stuttered, trying to pry his arms off of me, without any great results.

“What? You seemed like you wanted it yesterday, I’m up for round two, why aren’t you?” He questioned.

“I didn’t wa- want it th- then either.” I stammered my breathing hitching in my throat.

“Now, kitty, we both know that’s not true,” he purred, biting my earlobe.

“Get off of me!” I tried shouting, as things started to get heated. He had turned me on and was crushing my lips against mine, his arms were locked around my waist, not letting me move anywhere. I wriggled my arms up, between his chest and mine, and attempted to fight him off. Tears were streaming down my face once again as I gave one final shove and he stumbled backwards. Anger and lust clouded his eyes as he strides towards me. In a flash, he had raised his arm and backhanded me before I even had time to move out of the way. I shriek of pain flew from my mouth and bounced off the walls in the room. I was sent tumbling to the floor. I raised my hand to my check and immediately felt a stinging sensation. I pulled my hand away and saw blood smeared on my hand. I brought it back up and traced the bleeding gash on my check, made from the tremendous graduation ring that sat on his hand.

“Let me get one thing straight with you,” he whispered, crouching down in front of me. He brought his hand up once more and I flinched away as he brought it up to brush some fallen hair out of my face and tuck it behind my hair. “I was going to be nice to you, try to make you enjoy it again, but I really don’t care if you want it or not. I want it, and that’s all that fucking matters.” He started crawling on top of me, pushing me onto my back. I reached my hand up and slapped him hard, but that just seemed to turn him on more. He grabbed both of my wrists and held them above my head, with one of his hands. The other hand was busy roaming around my body.

He brought his hand down and started to toy with the hem of my shorts. He was raking his hands over the inside of my thighs as he was grinding his very evident bulge against my hip. I squeezed my eyes tight, not wanting to look into his demonic eyes. He moved his hands a little brought it up to my waist band and he soon slipped his rough, calloused hand into them.

“Please, stop.” I begged him, over and other, this was my mantra. Even though my eyes were clamped shut, tears still managed to leak through. I cried and sobbed and begged him, but nothing deterred him, he only had one thing in mind. For a minute, he just rested his hand against my most private area, but that didn’t last very long. He soon slipped a finger in between my folds, sliding it up and down, toying with my clit, as he did so; he let out a low chuckle.

“Oh, kitty, it doesn’t seem like you want me to stop, you’re so fucking wet right now.” He continued with the foreplay, but only for a little bit, he had other things in mind. In one fellow swoop, we ripped my shorts and underwear off my body. “Open your eyes; I want to look into them as I plough into you.” He whispered huskily, though I refused. “OPEN YOUR EYES!” He screamed in my face, slapping me on the same cheek, even though I didn’t want to, I knew I had to or there was far worse to come. “That’s my good kitty,” he purred affectionately. “Are you ready?” He whispered, pressing a slow kiss to my lips.

“No,” I sobbed out.

“Oh, well I don’t care,” he smirked. Without warning, he slammed into me and I let out a shriek of pain. He pulled out almost completely, before slamming into my again, each time letting out a small grunt and each time I let out a scream of excruciating pain. “Kitty, your eyes are gorgeous when you’re in pain.” He kept pounding into me, over and over again, not stopping until he got his satisfaction. Time went by in slow motion until he finally pulled out of me. It felt like hours had passed, when in reality, it hadn’t even been half an hour. After he released, he stood up and pulled his pants back up, and promptly left.

I couldn’t even move; pain was holding my in place; I just curled up in a tight ball and cried. I sobbed until I had dried up; there were no more tears to shed. I could feel the dried blood that had trickled down my leg. When I felt ready to stand, I walked into the bathroom. I gasped when i saw my reflection.

To say I was a mess would be an understatement. My eyes were red and puffy, you could clearly see tear track marks on my cheeks, I had been crying so much lately I was surprised I still had tears left. As I glanced down to my legs, I saw a steady stream of red, cracked, dried blood, coming about half way down my thigh, though the worst thing about my appearance was the angry, red, still bleeding gash on my face. It ran from the top of my cheek bone all the way to the corner of my lips. There was blood smeared on some of the plain, unaffected skin from when I touched the gash.

I walked over to the bathtub, (yes, there was a bathtub and a shower, this bathroom was like the size of my room back home) slowly. With each small and hesitant step came a new blossom of pain waves. Though once I started the tap, I ran it very hot. I slowly undressed and stuck my foot into the steaming water, I immediately felt it itch and burn my skin, though the feeling was nice and calming. After hesitantly lowering my entire body into the water, feeling my muscles relax. I allowed myself a few moments peace before cleaning myself up.

I scrubbed my body until it glowed pink. I scrubbed the dried blood from my legs and slowly and gently cleaned the blood and the other remnants from my lower area. I then looked at my wrist and began to clean the already healing cuts. I had always been a fast healer, though that didn’t mean that it hurt less. Lastly, I clean the dried and fresh blood from my face, though with each sud that entered the cut, it stung even more. After I was all cleaned, the water had turned a light red from all the blood that had come away from my body.

When I had gotten out of the bath and wrapped myself in a towel, when I walked out, towel drying my hair, I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw Shadows sitting on my bed cradling his head in his hands, though when he heard the door opening, he looked up. Immediately his eyes travelled towards my cheek, eyebrows scrunching together in confusion, though he never asked. After looking at each other for a few moments, he stood up and walked towards me.

“I left you some clothes on the bed, get dressed and ready, we’re going out.” He said in a solid, calm voice, though his eyes never left the gash.

“Where are we going?” I whispered, scared that if i spoke any louder he would get mad and lash out.

“Well tonight, you’re going to be our groupie,” he smirked before striding out of the room. Once he was gone, I ran over to the door and locked it; I didn’t want anyone to walk in on me getting changed. I had put on everything he had told me to, including the jewellery, which thankfully covered everything on my arms that needed to be covered, though that seemed like the only part of me that was covered. I didn’t want to look in the mirror, knowing that I felt and probably looked like a slut right now, but I couldn't resist, I had to know how I was dressed and I regretted it immediately.

I was wearing a loose white crop top that stopped just above my navel and shorts that were so short. I was wearing a black studded belt and a beige mesh scarf with many bracelets and a feather necklace hanging around my neck. I was thankful that he hadn't picked out heels for me to wear, instead, I was wearing a worn out pair of loose combat boots.

When it was time to go, Shadows came back into the room and took my hand in his leading me outside into a limo where the rest of the guys were waiting for us.

“Nice cut, kitty, maybe next time you’ll learn to behave,” Zacky called to me as I sat down, none of the guys questioned it, thinking that I probably deserved it. As soon as we started moving, Shadows started laying down some rules for the night.

“You are not to look at another guy except for us tonight. You do not speak until told to or asked. You remain by my side. When I tell you to stay put you are to remain there until I say otherwise. And most importantly, don’t fucking wander off, because trust me, Dollface, I will fucking find you.” Through the whole thing he never broke eye contact, and that’s how I knew how much he meant his words, and that thought scared me even more. He then turned around and placed his hand on my exposed thigh, keeping it there the entire ride.

I was still utterly confused where we were going when we pulled up, but as soon as I stepped out of the limo, I immediately knew from the distant cheers and chanting. The sun was still bright and beaming so I had to squint to look around the venue. There was a line of screaming fans, all turned in our directions, all screaming different names. There was a variety of people waiting in line, though many of them looked to be the “rocker” style, much like the guys were, and suddenly, I felt incredibly out of place.

I stood at the back of the crowd as the rest of the group headed towards a backdoor that was being held open by a rather large man, standing there with his arms crossed, muscles rippling, though Shadows still stood by my side, his arm draped over my petite frame.

“See all those people, they’re all here for us,” he smirked, whispering in my ear. Only then did I notice what was written on the signs and what they were chanting. It was the names I was all too familiar with, Synyster Gates, Shadows, Zacky Vengeance, The Rev, and Johnny Christ. Painted on posters, tattooed on bodies, and on shirts was a little skull with bat wings, a cult, maybe? Upon closer inspection, all the shirts had “Avenged Sevenfold” written on them, a band. Why did it sound so familiar?

My gaze was broken when he started to steer me into the building, once we were inside, the man closed it and stood in front of it, no one could get in or out with him approving and I’m sure he had strict rules not to let me out. He led me into a room filled with couches, chairs, booze and water, along with a few snacks.

He sat me down in a chair and knelt before me. “I’m going to go get ready, stay here, drink some water, whatever, and just don’t move. Got it?” He asked, and I, immediately, gave a little nod and a smile bloomed onto his face. “Good girl,” he said before standing up and placing a kiss on my forehead.

I didn’t dare move, so I just looked around the room, sipping on the water bottle he had given me. The room was a disaster, though I’m fairly certain it’s from the many people hustling around. Some were carrying amps, others guitars and microphones.

I don’t really know how much time had gone by, but I was on my second bottle of water when Shadows came back for me.

“Come on, you’re moving,” he stated, grabbing my forearm and dragging me along behind him.

“Moving where?” I asked, trailing along slowly.

“Just somewhere I can put you for safe keeping while we do our show. Don’t worry about it, as long as you stay put, we won’t have an issue,” he said, coming to a stop in front of a door.

When he opened it, we were facing a broom closet, only big enough to hold a few brooms and a mop or two. “Get in.”

“What? No way, that’s a fucking closet!” I shouted defiantly, crossing my arms. I turned around and faced him, standing firmly and giving him a stern look.

“I said, get in, slut,” he said slowly, enunciating every word.

“And I said, no,” pausing deliberately between words. With a huff, he placed his hands on my upper arms and picked me up and putting me in the closet, closing the door.

“Now stay put, remember my rules? If you leave, there will be hell to pay, keep that in mind.”

“FUCK YOU! LET ME OUT, THIS IS A FUCKING CLOSET, SHIT FACE!” I screamed out.

“Oh, and keep it down, I don’t need anyone asking any unnecessary question. With each complaint or question I get, you get any punishment of my choice,” he said, chuckling as he walked away, shortly after, I could hear chanting and a guitar riff, after a few bars, I could hear a faint, melodic voice. I sank to the floor stunned, I wasn’t aware these guys did anything other than be assholes, but apparently they had a talent. They were a band in the real world; I bet no one knew what went on behind closed doors. No one knew I was being hidden away from the world in this closet, too scared to move. No one knew that they had kidnapped 20 other girls, all of which had been kept so long that they no longer cared. No one knew that I even existed right now.

I rested my head on the back wall and slowly drifted off, when I woke up; I had the sudden urge to pee. I tried to ignore it, focusing on the music that was still being played, though after a short amount of time, I could no longer ignore it. I don’t think I’ve ever had to pee so fucking badly in my entire life! Thinking that no one would know if I quickly went to the bathroom, I slowly stood up and soundlessly opened the door, peaking my head out, checking if the coast was clear. Determining that no one was near, I crept out of the closet, searching frantically for the bathroom.

“Holly? Is that you?” My breathing hitched in my throat and I stopped dead in my track. That voice did not come from anyone in the house; it came from someone completely different. I spun around on my heels and came face to face with the blond haired, blue eyed Carson, the boy I would day dream about back at school, the boy that I had only ever had one conversation with. “Where the fuck have you been? Everyone’s been worried sick. You come home, only to be gone again in a week! We sent out a search party, your parents are terrified,” he said all this in one breathe and when he stopped to breathe, I finally stepped closer to him, lowering my voice so no one could hear me.

“What are you doing here?” I whispered harshly, though I was incredibly relieved.

“I came to an Avenged concert, what are you doing here?”

“Look, you’re not going to believe me, but they put me in that closet, told me to stay put, threatening to hurt me if I got out. You have to help me; they’re going to kill me!” I whispered, tears welling in my eyes.

“Who? Who’s going to hurt you?” He said, gripping onto my arms affectionately. It was only then did I realise that the music had stopped.

“Hey, kid! What are you doing back here?” Boomed a voice, I turned around and saw a security guard storming towards us, Shadows following closely behind, rage evident in his eyes.

“I’ll be back for you.” He whispered.

“Come with me, you shouldn’t be back here.” The guard shouted again, dragging Carson, my only hope, away from me. My hope diminished as Shadows draped his arm over me.

“When we get home, you’re in for a world of pain, I assure you.” He said, through a clenched grin.