They call him Shadows

This is the most awkward, fearing and frightening scene I've ever been on. I feel all my body tense more and more under Mr Sanders eyes. It's only me and him, alone sitting next to each other on a black leather couch. The room we're in is quite big. The walls are covered in white, and it has some paintings scattered around the walls of the room. On the center it has a dark wood desk with a computer and some papers on it. It also has two chairs on the front and one on the back of it. On my right there's a big window glass that gives access to a beautiful garden, full of colors Green from the grass , yellow, purple, White and red from the various flowers around the garden. I heard voices in the room and turned my head to see Mr Sanders shaking hands with a man. Black hair, blue eyes and taller than me. I was expecting to see a man dressed in white, not in a black t shirt and jeans.


- Alexis right?- He said offering me his white smile, extending his hand to greet me which made me to stand up to nervously shake his hand.

- Hum ... Yes.- I sat back and felt Mr Sanders sit back too, while the doctor pushed a chair and sat in front of us. I looked down to my lap and started to pick on my fingers. I didn't wanted to be there. I didn't wanted to people to know that I had a beast inside of me. I didn't wanted but there was one person who confronted me and I felt the most weak person in the world in front of him. What is he gonna do with me? Sending me into an hospital? A mental hospital? I'm sure i'm not that ill to go in there. What is he going to do with me? And why does he wants to help me?


- Alexis...- I turned looked up and noticed that only the doctor was with me in the room. - Do you know why you are here ?


- I ...- my voice came out trembling I didn't wanted to say it again. I knew perfectly why i was here and looking back, it was the stupid fucking thing I've ever done. How could he have that effect on me that makes me weak till the point i spit it out the biggest problem in my life?
- I know your nervous, and i understand, but i'm here to help you. - The doctor said in a tranquil voice that made me calm down a little.

- And i need you to cooperate with me, okay?- I nodded not wanting to say anything. I watched him getting up, walking towards his desk only to grab some papers and a pen, returning to his sit in front of me.

- Let's start with some basic questions okay? - I nodded and he wrote something down on the paper.


- Tell me your full name and your birth date, please.


- Alexis Eleanor Scali, May 17th 1991.- Weakly i said and he wrote it down and looked up to me again.


- I assume you're Italian, right? -

- Yes, I am. - He wrote it down again.

- Are you working or studying?

- Studying. Modern Literature. - He wrote it down.

- Here in New York?

- Yes.

- Does your parents live here with you ?

- No. They live in California. I live with a friend and my boyfriend. - I looked down thinking about Jason. He hadn't contacted me since he went to his father's wedding three days ago. Maybe he's just enjoying some time with his family. Though it had only passed three days, i already miss him.

- Do you have a stable relationship with your boyfriend? - I looked up and swallowed the lump that had been on my throat. Our relationship wasn't that good at this moment, but it is something that i can deal with. After all, relationships aren't just smiles and some romance.

- I can see that something is wrong with your relationship.-

- No. Everything's fine. Just highs and lows. - I whispered. Once again he wrote something down before he spoke again.

- And you said you lived with a friend too. Is she your best friend? -

- Yes. - I smiled. Kim has become my best friend since the first day she made me to go out with her. I never thought i'd enjoy going out, but with her it's impossible not to enjoy. She's just the funniest person i've ever met. Half an hour had passed when i looked to the black clock hanging on the wall. He kept asking me things about my life, my future ambitions, and about my family until one simple question came out from his mouth that i wasn't able to answer. Are you happy Alexis? Am i? I don't know. I've never felt completely happy.

- Take your time Alexis. If you don't want to answer that's okay, i understand it. - He said tranquilizing me. My eyes started to watering, and i began to shake. He picked up a tissue from the table next to him and handed it me and i thanked him. I wiped the tears from my cheeks and took a deep breath.

- I -- - Someone knocked on the door and it opened to reveal Mr Sanders. He walked towards us, never breaking his gaze from mine.

- Jimmy i think it's enough. She needs to rest.- He said and the doctor, who now i know his name is Jimmy stood up and walked to his desk. Mr Sanders walked towards me offering his hand for me to take. I took it and stood up, wincing when he squeezed my hand and he led me to where Jimmy was.

- Here. Buy this so she can be more relaxed. And i'd like to see her next week. Maybe twice a week. We'll have to see how things go. - Jimmy said handing a paper to Mr Sanders.

- And Alexis, don't do anything reckless please. - Jimmy said. I gave him a weak smile knowing that i'd probably couldn't keep a promise. The thing within me was on 24/7 working and i didn't know how to avoid it. Jimmy led us to the front door, saying goodbye and warning Mr Sanders that we had an appointment next week. Me and Mr Sanders went to his car and he drove out. The air inside the car was too heavy. Too heavy for me to still breathing normally He kept his eyes on the road, jaw clenched, and his hands were gripping firmly on the steering wheel. I looked out of the window, not wanting to see that he somehow was angry. Why? I don't know, but i felt his was. We stopped in front of a drugstore and he got out of the car without saying anything. I watched him walking inside the drugstore and after some minutes he was back inside the car with a bag with medicines inside. Without saying nothing, he turned on the car and drove out.

- We're going to have lunch together and i expect you to not do any of the things you did this morning. You have medicines to take and it'll be worse if you take then without eating first. - He said not looking at me. I felt ashamed with the attitude he was having towards me. No one has even talked to with with so much demand on their voices, with so much control. After all, no one else did find out about the beast until now.

- Are you even listening to what i am saying?- He snapped me out of my subconscious making me to look at him. His hazel beautiful eyes were now filled up with a dark emotion. His dimple smile was hiding behind a dark severe face. I looked down to my lap not finding the strength to look at him one more second. He imposed such a strong and controlling force towards me that i didn't even knew what to think, and what to say. What's happening to me?


- Yes. - I whispered.

He sighed heavily, - What were you thinking when you did that this morning? What do you think when you do that? Are you trying to kill yourself? Because if you want to, i won't let you. - I stopped breathing. I looked to him and he looked to me with his dark beautiful eyes.

- I refuse to watch you die slowly and do nothing. You'll get out of this either you want or not. - He turned his gaze to the road and i kept looking at him. I've never been so affected by someone's words. I've never felt such a deep sorrow like i feel now listening to his words. He didn't knew me. I was a complete stranger, and yet he was willing to help me. He was willing to fight against the beast. The lunch was even more heavier than the car ride. He ordered red fish with smashed potatoes for both of us and a bottle of white wine for him and a bottle water for me. Under his controlling gaze, i made an effort to eat everything i had in front of me, but it was too much. I had already eaten half of the food i had on my plate and i couldn't bare to eat more.

- I can't. - I whispered placing down my silverware and looked up to him fearing his reaction. He sigh and nodded as if he was saying that it was fine. I watched his taking the medicines out of the bag, taking one pill out of three boxes. He extended his hand with three pills on his palm. I swallowed hard not wanting to take them. I knew what they'd do to me. They'd make me stop my habits. They'd make the beast go away.

- Alexis if you don't take them by yourself i'm gonna make you swallow them myself. - I nervously took the pills from his hand, placing them inside my mouth and taking a sip of my water, painlessly swallowing the three pills all in once.

- Good girl. - He leaned on his chair watching me as if he was waiting for some kind of reaction from the pills. Surprisingly the beast didn't make a move. He finished his meal, paid for the lunch and we were back into his car. After a while I began to feel all of my body relaxed, my eyes were starting to close and i was feeling very tired, like if i didn't slept for days.

- What did you make me take? - I asked feeling the tiredness taking control of my actions.

- It was a sleeping pill, a pill to make you stop vomiting and another one to make you relax. - I heard his calming voice echoing in my ears before i drifted off to sleep.


----


I woke up disoriented, and confused. After a while i noticed that i was in my room at my house. How did he find out where i live? I sat up and saw him sitting on the chair that was in front of my bed. He smiled at me and i weakly returned.

- Hi - I whispered.

- Hi. Sleep well? - I nodded watching him standing up, walking towards me. He sat down next to me and sigh.

- The medicines Jimmy gave you are making his magic. You look even more beautiful than this morning. - I blushed hearing it. Why are you blushing? You never did that before!


- Were you watching me while i was sleeping?

- I couldn't take my eyes off of you. You looked so peacefully. So sweetly, so lovely. - He caressed my cheek but i backed up.

- Why are you helping me? - He stood up looking down at me. I could sense that he was getting nervous, or maybe uncomfortable. I heard the front door getting closed and i stood up quickly fearing it was Jason. I lost my balance and almost fell but luckily Matt got me and pulled me closer to him. He smelled heavenly good. A sweet mixture between his cologne and his body shower. That smell made me feel numb.

- Alex, where are you? - I heard Kim's voice and sighed revealed that it was her instead of Jason. Matt let go of me and pulled away from me not breaking his gaze from mine. I couldn't imagine Jason's reaction if he saw us two here, alone. Not that we did something, but this was enough for Jason to make a scene.

- Oh, there you are. Are you feeling okay? What's wrong with you? - She said entering my room, hugging me when she was near me. I could feel the worry in her voice.

- It's nothing, really. I just felt a little sick and asked him to bring me home. - I said once we pulled away. She looked to Matt and muted an 'oh'.

- But you could have called me. - She said turning her gaze to me.

- Nonsense. I knew you were having fun and i didn't wanted to disturb you. - She smiled, probably recalling the last night events.

- Well now that you have your friend here, i'm going home. Don't forget to take them. - He walked towards me and placed a kiss on my forehead and said goodbye to Kim and walked out. Kim and i kept looking at each other without saying anything. Once we heard the front door got closed, i sighed heavily and Kim smiled like an idiot.

- Alexis Eleanor what was that? - She said sounding more excited than me. I sat on the bed and she sat next to me looking at me expecting me to say something.

- I'm not telling you anything, because nothing happened. He just brought me home and stayed here until now.

- Yeah i can see that... But why? - Sometimes she could really be a pain in the ass. But she was my friend and i couldn't complain about it. I told her everything omitting the doctor's episode. I didn't wanted her to know that i was, from now on going to see a psychiatrist. It was already too embarrassed to be having two people knowing about the beast, i didn't needed another one.

- And he brought you some pills to take? - I nodded.

- Where are those? I'm going to take care of you now. - She stood up walking out of my room, and i followed her into the kitchen. When i passed through the living room, i noticed that both of my bag and hers were on the couch.

- Kim, there's no need too. I'm fine. - I said entering in the kitchen and saw her taking out the medicines out of the bag, placing them on the kitchen table.

- There's a note here. - She said frowning, taking a small paper from the bag.

- What does it says?- I frowned too not remembering seeing him writing anything. Probably he wrote it when i was sleeping.

- It's says I'll call you tonight. - She said handing me the small paper. I studied his handwriting. It was the most well understandable handwriting i've ever seen. I heard Kim moving around the kitchen preparing our dinner and knowing i was useless there, i went back to my room, taking my bag so i could unpack it. While eating, Kim filled me in on what had happened last night and today with her and with the sinister-sexy guy as she calls him. She told me that he is the most hot man she had ever seen, after Mr Sanders. I learned that the guys name is Brian and that he is Mr Sanders co- worker at the cosmopolitan magazine. Once I finished eating with a lot of effort what Kim had prepared for me, which consisted on a chicken soap, Kim made sure i'd take the pills, and i knew that i'd get sleepy once i took them. I wondered if this was the doctors scheme so i wouldn't have the time to go to the bathroom and pour everything i had on my stomach. I never knew that there was pills that could have such a quick effect, or maybe i'm just too weak. Once i was done unpacking, Kim came into my room to see how i was.

- Jason called me today telling me to tell you that he was going to spend the next week in L.A. - She said.

- What? Why didn't he called me instead? - And why he is going to spend another week in L.A.? As far as i know, his father marriage was yesterday and he was supposed to come back to NY today. This was too weird. First, he doesn't call me or text me the entire weekend, and now he's going to stay there for a week.

- He told me that he tried to call you but your cell phone must've died, so he called me. - She said taking a sit beside me on the bed. I looked to my nightstand and grabbed my phone, noticing that in fact, it had died. I got up and put it on change, turning it on only to see that i had one missed call from Jason and three from Mr Sanders. Wait. Mr Sanders? How did he got my number and how did he saved his number on my cell phone?

- Is everything okay? - I heard Kim asking and i turned around to face her.

- Yeah. Kim if you don't mind i'd like to sleep now. I'm really tired. - I said walking towards my bed. She nodded giving me a weak smile. She stood up and hugged me whispering that if i needed anything she'd be there. Than she left me alone in my could cocoon i call room. I went to dress my pj's and when i was getting into bed, i heard my phone ringing. I stood to pick it up and went back to sit on my bed. When i looked the the screen, Mr Sanders was flashing on it.

- Hello.

- Miss Scali. Are you feeling better? - His deep, tranquilized voice gave me chills down my spine.

- Yes, thank you. And you Mr Sanders? - he chuckled.

- I am too Miss Scali. Did you took the medicines?

- Yes. - I said almost whispering not used to getting this kind of attention. This was too much for me to bare, but then i'd never felt like this. Glad that someone was looking after me, but at the same time frighten because this was the first time that someone took care of me and worried about me.

- Dr Sullivan told me to tell you that your next appointment will be on Wednesday at six, will that be okay for you?

- There's no need to, really. I'm feeling better now and i didn't threw up after taking the pills. - I said trying to reassure him that i was better and that i didn't needed to go to see the doctor again. Today's appointment was too frighten for me to wanting to go there again. Not that Dr Sullivan wasn't good, but i didn't liked to talk about my deepest fears.

-That is not on discussion. I'll pick you up at your place at five thirty on Wednesday. Now you should sleep. - There he goes again the controlling man with beautiful hazel eyes that always gets what he wants. Knowing that i wouldn't win this, i agreed on going. We said our goodbyes and once my comfortable collided with my bed, i drifted off to sleep dreaming with hazel eyes that turn into dark ones.