The Music We Make

A few days had gone by and the recording process had continued as usual. Brian would do his typical screams when he messed up, Zack would laugh at him, and then Brian would play it perfectly. It all became a routine for us honestly. I didn’t have to break out my own guitar again and things were running super smooth.

The three of us were taking a break from recording and were watching Matt. Mudrock was working with him mostly, so it was nice for me to just sit back and assist him rather than taking the lead. Brian, Zack, and Jimmy sat back on the couch behind Mudrock and I as Matt was in the booth singing. Johnny was working with Fred in another section of the studio on his parts of the song.

“You’re flat,” Brian piped in after Matt sang the chorus to Burn It Down.

Matt took a swig of water and signaled Mudrock to start over, and he did the take again. We continued this way for a few hours, the guys piping in advice for Matt, and Mudrock producing a great track. After awhile I drifted off into a daydream, not on purpose, but because I wasn’t really contributing to this whole process at the moment.

I thought about all of the things I needed at the grocery store, what time I was going to get to the gym and what I would do, and then my mind started to wander off onto the one thing I didn’t really want to think about: Brian. I imagined him at Johnny’s bar, playing pool with that sexy black T-shirt he wore the other nights. I thought about his sexy smirk and the way he would bend over the table, his ass sticking out the perfect amount. But before my mind could wander into much else, my musings were interrupted.

“Earth to Rosie!!” I heard Jimmy yell, making me jump.

“Oh, shit, I’m sorry,” I said, laughing. The guys all laughed at me then, knowing that Jimmy had snapped me out of a daze. “I was lost in thought.”

“Must have been a good, sexy daydream,” Jimmy said with a laugh.

I felt my face turn red. “Not quite,” I said, knowing that if I was given more time, it may have turned to that.

“Did you hear the last take?” Zack asked me, trying to get us all back on track.

“She was clearly lost in her little world! I wanna know who you were thinking about!” Jimmy said.

“I was thinking about what I need at the grocery store,” I told him. I wasn’t lying, technically.

“LIES!” Jimmy yelled, pointing his finger to the air. I couldn’t help but giggle at his antics.

“Back to business, Rosie,” Mudrock said, clearly annoyed with me. “Listen.”

He played back what had just been recorded, layering all of the parts together so I could hear what was finished so far. I was really impressed and I told everyone that I thought it was good to go.

The boys seemed satisfied with the recording as well, so it was time to take a break. Slowly, everyone worked their way out of the main studio area, but I stayed behind for a moment. I stood there, staring off into space, mentally scolding myself for letting myself be
embarrassed like that.

I felt a hand on my arm and I couldn’t help but jump, and I wanted to roll my eyes at myself. I was just telling myself to not be so distracted, and here I was!

I turned to see Brian ginning at me and his hand was still on my arm. I couldn’t help but giggle in embarrassment and nervousness, wondering what he wanted.

From where we stood, no one else could see us. The guys were in the kitchen area getting out something to eat for lunch, but Brian lingered there with me. He moved his hand off of my arm and brushed a loose hair behind my ear, then slowly brushed his fingers against my neck. I felt goose bumps form along my arms at his touch and I swallowed deeply, not knowing what to do or say.

“I wonder who you were dreaming about,” he whispered. He was looking down at my lips instead of in my eyes, and he bit his lip. Then his gaze drifted back to my eyes. He hand dropped from my neck and he smirked, backing away from me a little bit. “I wonder.”

With that, he left, walking into the eating area with the rest of the band. I stood there for a moment, trying to wrap my head around what just happened. It turned me on the way he touched me and looked at me, but I was pissed that he just walked away. I did not like to be teased like this!

I walked out to the kitchen then too, not wanting it to look weird that I hadn’t joined them yet.

“You ok?” Johnny asked. “You look flushed.”

My blush on my face was still lingering. I sighed and said, “I’m good, just a little hot. I’m gonna get some air.”

When I walked out, I saw Brian smirking at my comment. Yes, you made me hot, Mr. Gates. Hope you’re proud of yourself.

The cool fall air was refreshing. I leaned against the building for a moment, closing my eyes to help myself calm down. I didn’t like how much this man was getting to me, especially when I didn’t know what his intentions were. Part of me loved the attention, but part of me almost feared what would come of it, especially if I let myself enjoy it as much as I wanted to.

When I went back in, the guys were all crowded around together, as if they were planning some big secret. Matt looked up when I came in the room and gave me a huge grin. It honestly made me nervous the way they were all staring at me.

“Rosie, don’t be mad at me,” Matt started. I gave him a look, and he continued with a chuckle, “Listen, I have an idea and I want you to say yes.”

“I make no promises,” I said, jokingly glaring and crossing my arms.

“Johnny’s Bar is having an open mic night Friday. They don’t have them often, but they’re always a lot of fun. We used to go and do them. I think you should go,” he said.

I felt a knot in my stomach. What had he told everyone? I dropped my arms and put my hands in my pockets and looked down at my feet. I didn’t really know what to do.

“I just think it would be a lot of fun,” Matt said softly, seeing my disdain.

“I don’t know,” I said, looking up. “I don’t think I have anything ready.”

“What I heard the other day sounded ready!” Matt said, trying to encourage me. “The best way to put yourself out there is to be heard. If you really want to write songs and sell them to other musicians, they gotta hear your stuff.”

He was right, I knew, but the thought of it made me so nervous. I wasn’t a performer. I knew I was talented, but actually getting up on stage in front of other people was terrifying to me. I hated being the center of attention. What if I messed up? Or if my voice cracked? I hated this about myself, but I couldn’t help but worrying about what other people would think of me.

“When we first started out, getting up on stage was scary. That’s one of the reasons I like have a stage name because it gives me a persona to hide behind,” I heard Brian say. I looked at him, and he was dead serious.

“You were really nervous?”

“Yes, and I still get nervous. But like Matt said, you need to let people hear your music. And selfishly I want to hear it too,” he added with a grin.

I chuckled, and felt better as the rest of the guys said words of encouragement.

“You will get on that stage, and blow everyone’s fucking minds!” Jimmy told me, jumping out of his seat. He grabbed me and lifted me into the air, shouting, “BLOW THEIR MINDS!”

I squealed in laughter as he swung me around. When he placed me back on the floor, he wrapped his arms around me and said, “Say you’ll do it or I’ll literally never let you go.”

I laughed, “Fine! I’ll do it! Let me go!”

Notes

So, Rosie's gonna sing in public! And more moments with Brian :) I'll update soon! Comments are appreciated!