Stars in the Night

“Oh, fuck this shit,” I moaned, closing my textbook and placing it on the bench next to me. At this point I could barely even see what I was trying to read anymore. I’d been sitting there since four in the afternoon and I didn’t even know what the time was anymore, just that the lights on the pier were on and the moon was out.

I leant back on the bench I was sat on and sighed. I loved Huntington Beach, everything about it was so beautiful. I had zero regrets about moving here from England. Sure, I missed home and my mum and sister, but what’s the point of floating through life not knowing what’s out there. I moved out here to find my place in the world and decide what I want to do with my life, and now I don’t think I could live anywhere else.

As I was staring off into space, I saw a man leaning on the barrier at the end of the pier, his head in his hands.

“Are you alright?” I asked him tentatively. He jumped, having obviously not noticed that he wasn’t alone. “Oh fuck, sorry! I didn’t mean to scare you,” I apologised.

“It’s alright, I didn’t know there was anyone here, off in my own little world, you know?” he replied, smiling at me. As I studied his face, my gaze fell on his vibrant green eyes. Holy mother of fuck. I felt my jaw drop slightly, but I quickly shook my head and regained my composure.

“Yeah, I get you. Are you okay? You look a bit dejected.”

“Honestly? I haven’t got a clue. I stormed out of an argument with my girlfriend and ended up here. I’m pretty sure there’s at least 3 broken wine glasses waiting for me at home.” He ran his hands through his hair, looked up at the sky and sighed. “Jesus, why am I telling you this shit? I don’t even know you.”

“Sometimes talking to strangers is easier than talking to people you know, they don’t know shit about you so it’s easier to get an objective answer. Hell, least you know that you won’t get fucking judged cause they don’t know the people you’re complaining about!” I smiled at him.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I’m just so tired of this crap.”

“Look, do you wanna sit down? I’m in no hurry to get anywhere and you look like you just need to relax for a minute, or seven,” I offered, motioning to the empty space on the bench beside me. He nodded and I moved my pile of notes and textbooks so he could sit down.

“What’s all that?” he asked, motioning to the pile I’d just moved.

“Oh, it’s my uni work, I couldn’t concentrate at home so bought it out here. Happens far too often to be honest, but as long as it gets done, then that’s all that matters, right?” I shot a half-hearted smile in his direction.

“That’s pretty cool, what college do you go to?” he asked as I cringed; I hated trying to answer this question.

“It’s the Open University,” I started, he looked confused.

“What’s that?”

“Basically, it’s this uni that’s based on distance study so they send you the textbooks and all that bollocks that you need and you teach yourself,” I explained.

“That’s pretty cool!” I nodded, agreeing with him. “What’re you studying?”

“Maths.”

“Okay, you’re crazy.”

“You’re not the first person to tell me that!” I laughed as he grinned at me. Now’s a better time than any to approach the elephant in the room I guess. “So, do you wanna talk about it?”

“Oh, I don’t even know any more. I’m trying so hard, but what even’s the point when everything I do is wrong? Am I not good enough? What did I do?” He leant forwards, head in his hands and elbows resting on his knees.

“Sometimes it’s not that you necessarily did something, it could be that she’s done something or feeling bad and she’s projecting that on to you. But that’s her problem to deal with, she shouldn’t be taking it out on you.”

“Whatever it is, it’s draining. It’s been going on for so long. It’s gotten to the point where it’s most evenings now. Whether or not we’ve had a good day, or been out with friends or just spent the day at home relaxing, an argument is pretty much guaranteed.”

“I’d say try and avoid provoking her, but it sounds like that’s impossible. Just try and look out for yourself, all these arguments can’t be doing you any good.” I couldn’t help but feel concerned for the guy.

“It’s not, it’s driving me insane. And I know she’s sleeping with other guys behind my back, everyone knows it, and there’s nothing I can do about it. If I even try and talk to her about it, it turns into a massive argument just like tonight.”

“I suppose with situations like this you just have to decide if she’s actually worth it and if you’re willing to put up with all the crap that’s thrown at you.”

“That’s the thing though, I’m not even sure if it is worth it anymore.”

“Hate to say it, but the only person who can make that decision is you.”

“Yeah, I know,” He sighed, leaning back onto the bench. “Thanks for listening to all my crap, it’s nice to be able to talk about it with someone who’s not biased, y’know?”

“You’re welcome,” I shot a small smile in his direction.

We settled into a comfortable silence as we sat staring out at the ocean, watching the waves roll down to the beach. It had to be after midnight, but at that point I really didn’t care. It was just good to have some company to help prepare me for the next day. I was dreading going home, I didn’t know if I would be able to handle it.

My phone started screaming at me, disturbing the silence. He looked at me and smirked as I searched through my bag. I grabbed my phone and unlocked it, stopping the noise.

Hey baby bear, it’s 8am here so it’s January 13th. I hope you’ll be okay today. Call me when you wake up. Stay strong, love you xxx

I sighed as I read the text from my mum, that familiar feeling of guilt and pain dropping straight to my stomach, just the same as last year.

“I should probably go, it’s getting late,” I said as I checked the time on my phone.

“Yeah, time to face the music I suppose.”

“Good luck with that. I’ll see you round, I guess,” I wished him luck as I stood up, grabbing my bag and papers, and started to walk off towards Main Street. I was jerked back as I felt him grab my wrist.

“Hey, I didn’t catch your name!”

“I’m Layla.”

“Zack.”

“Yeah, I know,” I smiled at him as I turned and walked away. I could have sworn I heard him laugh.

Notes

So, I started this on Mibba in March-ish time.

Any feedback would be fab!

Thanks :D xo