Confession of a King

I let out a sigh, walking back to the car with Alec in my arms. I closed the door and pulled out his bottle of formula, making the crying little boy happy. Matt was still inside the house with the realtor, but I was ready to leave. This was the fourth home we looked at today, and I just wanted him to make a damn decision on what one he wanted to buy. We had been arguing a little bit back and forth throughout our drives from home to home. He wanted me to get the house of my dreams, but my dreams weren't million dollar homes. I just wanted a nice place for the two of us, Alec, Hunter and maybe another kid sooner or later. But Mr. Money couldn’t settle for average, and needed to go over the top.

My eyes directed themselves to the front door of the large, brick home, walking Matt walk out smiling at the real estate agent. Alec was finally done eating, and was now falling back asleep, so I got out of the car and put him in his car seat, expecting that we were about done here.

“Ivy,” the realtor, Janetta, called my name. “You would’ve loved the rest of the home. Are you sure you don’t want me to bring you back through it now that your son is settled?”

I gave her a fake smile, “No, thank you. Matt has good enough taste for the both of us.”

“We’ll be in touch,” Matt smiled at her. “I’ll let you know if we have a decision out of the homes today, or if there are others we would like to see in the future.”

“I look forward to hearing from you, Mr. Sanders,” Janetta smiled and got into her Cadillac.

I got back into the car and buckled myself in the passenger seat, then checked in the back to make sure Alec was still fine. He was going to have a doctors appointment with his pediatrician in the upcoming week, just for a check-up and start on vaccinations. I couldn’t believe he was growing so fast. I looked down at my lap when I heard Matt’s door open. I pulled my sunglasses over my eyes, bracing myself for another argument.

“Would it kill you to act interested in any way?” Matt’s gruff voice spoke from beside me, starting up the engine. “I get that Alec was hungry, but you could’ve fed him inside and walked the rest of the house with me.”

I looked out the window as we pulled out of the driveway, “I’m just not as turned on by lavish homes as you. I don’t know what you want me to tell you. It’s your money, you choose the fucking house.”

Matt’s foot hit the break and I could feel him glare at me, “Watch the fucking attitude.”

“Do not do this with him in the car,” I stared at him, pursing my lips. “He’s sleeping and I’d rather not subject him to your wrath.”

Matt rolled his eyes and looked back at the road, driving again. I sighed and looked out the window. We were past the “honeymoon phase” now, and reality was setting in that we were actually stuck together. The excitement of being together was wearing off, and now we were working on figuring out how to deal with our differences. We tried our best not to argue in front of the small human, or even the guys, but sometimes it would happen. Usually things would work themselves out, but this was a learning experience for the both of us. We were together 24/7, and when you’re together that often, you’re bound to get on each other’s nerves.

Matt’s right hand reached over from the steering wheel and rested on my thigh. He gave it a small squeeze, pulling my body closer to the center console. His fingertips rubbed the exposed skin through my ripped jeans; his way of apologizing for snapping at me without having to use words. I smiled to myself, discretely, and traced the outlines on his colorful arms with my own fingertips.

“Do you want to get lunch or do you want to go home?” He asked quietly.

I glanced into the backseat once again, seeing Alec passed out asleep, “Only if we go somewhere quiet, and if he wakes up he’s your issue.”

I saw Matt smile out of the corner of my eye, his dimples poking through before he gnawed on his bottom lip and replaced the smile with a straight face. I rolled my eyes under my sunglasses a his actions. He was back to trying to keep himself as stoic as possible, really only smiling if it had to do with me or Alec. I guess it was all part of him being back in business.

Matt sat across from me, Alec sound asleep in the carrier beside him. He played with his food, moving it around with his fork, and refused to make eye contact with me. I knew he could feel my eyes on him as I took bites of my salad. He was acting strange, and maybe that was an underlying reason why we had been arguing so much throughout the day today. He had gotten a phone call right before we walked in here, and it didn’t sound like things went too well.

“Spit it out, Matthew,” I put my fork down and crossed my arms over my chest. I had asked him what was wrong, what he needed to tell me, about five times and he wouldn’t answer or would just shake his head. “You’re hiding something.”

He put his fork down, finally, and leaned back in the booth. His hazel eyes came in contact with my brown ones as his lip twitched, wanting to speak. He sighed and pulled his hat off his head, running a hand through his hair, “I have to go on a mission tonight with Gates.”

I raised an eyebrow, “What kind of mission?”

“Deal gone wrong,” he frowned when he saw my facial expression. “I should only be gone for a few hours.”

“Great,” I muttered, pushing my plate away from me, no longer wanting to eat. “Is this why you’ve been such a dick today? How long have you known about this?”

He tried to reach across the table for my hands, but I pulled them away and he put his back into his lap. “Christ had been trying to negotiate things all morning, but everything kept going south. I assumed that I would have to get involved at some point, but that phone call made it clear that it needed to happen tonight. I didn't want to have to do this already.”

“This is the life I chose,” I moved my vision away from Matt and out the window a few seats away from us. “I’m guessing deal gone wrong means you’ll be bringing guns.”

“Iv,” he sighed. “It’s going to be a piece of cake. Most likely Gates and I will show up, and we’ll just have a discussion without any type of weapon being used.”

“Or, someone gets shot and I either get worried sick that you’re dead or going back to prison,” I retorted, staring back at him. “I’m not okay with this, Matthew.”

“I know, baby, but I’ve done this a million times and things always…” He got cut off by our waitress coming over, asking if everything was fine. “We’ll take the check,” Matt forced a smile as she walked away.

“Things always what? Turn out fine? Do they, Matt? Do they?” I shook my head.

This time he did reach over the table and grab my hands in his, “Look, soon you won’t ever have to worry about this again, okay? But for now, this is what is going to happen. I know what I’m doing, Ivy. I will be gone tonight for no more than three hours. I won’t leave until you fall asleep, and by the time you wake up I’ll be back in bed, alright?”

“It just scares me,” I jutted out my bottom lip. “I don’t want anything to happen to you.”

“Nothing is going to happen. I’m Shadows, remember?” he laughed, making me laugh along with him.

The waitress came over and Matt paid for our lunch, then grabbed Alec’s carrier and brought it back out to the car. When I went to get into the passenger side, Matt pressed me up agains the door, wrapping his arms around my waist and looking down at me with a goofy grin. I stood on my toes and leaned forward, catching his lips with mine. We may had been arguing quite a bit, recently, but I loved him, and I wasn’t going to hold a grudge over something small.

“What the hell are you smiling at?” I pushed his chest, lightly, as he continued to stare down at me.

“Close your eyes,” he laughed.

“Why?” I raised an eyebrow.

He rolled his eyes, “Because I said so.”

“How old are you? Five? That is the worst excuse you could ever give me,” I pursed my lips and continued to stare up at him. “Try again.”

“Because you belong to me and do as I tell you,” he smirked, making me glare more. This time he groaned and took his left hand, covering my eyes, “Why must you make things difficult?”

I laughed then bit my lip, “Because I know how much you love when I don’t do as you tell me.” I felt his right hand behind my neck, then the feeling of something cold resting on my chest, in between my collar bones. “What are you doing?”

Matt lifted his hand off my eyes and walked away from me, getting into the Jeep and leaving me at the passenger side, confused. I opened up the door and climbed inside, pulling down the sun visor and looking at my chest. He had put a necklace on me, a solid gold death bat. I reached for it and examined it in the mirror.

“Turn it around,” Matt spoke from beside me, starting the engine once again. I flipped it to see the backside, the name Shadows engraved on the back in cursive. “I expect you to keep this on 24/7 as a reminder to yourself and everyone else that you are mine and only mine.”

I looked over at him, my cheeks red from blushing, and nodded. It was honestly a beautiful necklace, even if it had to do with Avenged. I knew that now that he was back into the gang world, it meant that more people were going to learn about me and there was the possibility of me meeting more of his allies and rivals. Matt wanted to make sure that everyone knew I belonged to him. I understood that, as much as I really didn’t want to, but he vowed to try to keep Alec a secret as best as he could. My mind obviously wandered over to past females who were involved with him. Corey had told me that I was Matt’s first “real” girlfriend in over seven years, but did he claim anyone else?

His hand wound up back on my thigh, rubbing my exposed skin, “I had that made when you went to go visit your family in New Jersey. Gates had been holding on to it, waiting for the right time to give it to you, and I took it back from him once I got out.”

“Stop reading my mind,” I laughed and leaned to my left, resting my head on his shoulder and snuggling his arm. “You knew I was thinking you gave this to another female.”

I heard him chuckle, “I never expected myself to do that for anyone. I have never loved anything, or anyone, more than I love you, honey. I can’t wait to make you my wife.”

Notes