Forever is Right Now

Five days have passed since the note came sailing through Zack’s window, today was the day all of us had been dreading. The day of Jimmy’s funeral. I stood in Matt’s guest bedroom, wearing a ¾ length sleeve dress with a swoop neckline, the fit was tight to my skin. Jimmy would have loved to have seen me in it. He would have told me I was trying to tease all the boys. I half smiled at my relfection thinking of how Jimmy, I wish I could hear his laughter. I wish he was here.

None of the boys have really gotten a good night’s rest, I haven’t really been the easiest person to be around. I was convinced that Scott was coming after me; that anxiety led to nightmares which meant night terrors for the most part. Matt was usually first to wake me up, followd by either Zacky or Brian crawling into bed with me. I’ll be back for her. The note had read, and it took the guys 2 days to convince me that I needed to leave my sanctuary that I’d found at Zacky’s house.

Zacky and Brian argued so much about what to do with me, Matt finally kind of just kidnapped me telling me what was going to happen. When Matt makes up his mind, as you’ve seen in the past, he usually stuck with it.

I was pulled out of my thoughts by a soft knock as Simone entered the room, “Hey, you ready?” She asked coming over to me.

I nodded and hugged her tightly, “How’s my nephew?”

She smiled, “He’s good, but he’s been kicking like crazy, no joke. This kid’s flexible as fuck.”

I chuckled and rubbed her belly, “I wish Jimmy could have stayed alive to meet this little guy.”

She nodded, “Me too Em, me too. But you know that Jimmy’s going to haunt us and make sure the kid ends up just as crazy as he was.” We both giggled a bit before I fought back tears. She noticed the look in my eyes and hugged me tightly to her, “He loves us babe. He’s never going to fully leave us. Today it’s just saying goodbye to his body, not his soul. He’s still alive through the music, in our hearts. He will live on through us, through the fans.”

I nodded knowing she was right and sighed before I sat on the bed to pull on my heels. “Are the guys ready?”

“I think so, they’re all outside smoking,” she rolled her eyes. “I’ve told your brother that he needs to cut it out once the baby’s here.”

I laughed, “No offense Simone, but if you can get Matt to stop smoking, I’ll love you forever.”

Simone smiled, “You know what Forever has in it?”

I raised an eyebrow, “Eternity?” I finally got my heels to cooperate and I stood up, my wedged heels making me about 4 inches taller.

She laughed and shook her head, “It has Rev in it. FoREVer.”

“Dude it does, think he did that on purpose so he could tell everyone he’s immortal?” I asked curiously thinking about Jimmy’s logic.

She laughed, “I’d bet my life on it.”

We giggled shaking our heads at our friend, he was a clever one, I couldn’t deny that. There was another knock before the door opened, “Girls?” Johnny appeared in the doorway.

“Yeah Johnny?” I replied looking at myself in the mirror one more time.

“You ready to go? Matt says it’s almost time for us to be there to greet everyone,” He said as he entered and looked at us both. “Jimmy would love your outfits.”

Simone smiled and nodded lightly fixing her knit dress over her baby bump, her sleeves barely coming above her wrists. “I agree, think he’d tell us we were teasing the universe,” she giggled as she waddled over to him in her ballet flats.

“Are you sure there’s only one kid in there?” I joked nodding at her belly that had seemed to grow over night.

She gave me the “bitch you did not” glare, “Yeah, I’m sure.” I held my hands up in a surrendering gesture chuckling to myself as Johnny made a slight smile. “Assholes,” Simone huffed then waddled out the door.

I chuckled and looked at my reflection, something was missing and I couldn’t figure out what. Johnny handed me a box that I’d forgotten about since Christmas. I opened it up to see a necklace that Jimmy had gotten me. It was half of an eighth note, sterling silver neckless. I had the end of it, the part that had Jimmy’s name engraved on it. “My necklace he gave me,” I whispered as tears flooded my vision. “He told me that I’d never be without him as long as I had this.” I held the necklace in my hand as if it were a delicate rose petal.

I could feel the love Jimmy had thought when he gave me this gift and I kissed Johnny’s cheek. “Where’d you find it?”

“Brian brought it, he figured you’d want to wear it today,” Johnny said softly wrapping an arm around my waist.

“Will you put it on me Johnny?” I asked just as softly, trying to keep my emotions in check.

“Of course, turn around and lift your hair,” he smiled at me taking the necklace from it’s home as I turned around. I lifted my hair as he arranged the necklace around my neck and latched it in back. “There you go babe.”

I smiled touching the music note gently, running my fingers over the engraving. “God I wish he was here,” I whispered, a tear falling down my cheek.

Johnny pulled me close in a hug, “We all do Em.” I nodded and hugged him back. “We should get down there before they send a search party.”

I laughed, “Yeah, let’s go.” I wrapped my arm around his as he offered and we walked down the stairs.

“Took you long enough short shit,” Matt stated rolling his eyes. “We gotta go.”

“Matty don’t be mad at him, he was helping me,” I kissed Matt’s cheek then went up to Brian. “Thank-you, for remembering this.”

He nodded and hugged me tightly to him and I was instantly overwhelmed by the cigarette smoke mixed with his cologne. “No problem Em, he would want you wearing it today. We made sure his was inside the casket when we were at the viewing last night.”

I nodded, “I’m sorry I couldn’t go. I just…I can’t imagine him laying there…I’d expect him to jump up and tell everyone this was a joke.”

Brian kissed my temple as we walked out the door. Matt locked up the house, everyone splitting up between Matt’s and Brian’s vehicles. Johnny rode with us because Zacky and Brian have been fighting whenever they’re near each other. I know it’s the stress of the entire situation, but you just…never know who’s watching. It’s better that no one sees them fight in public.

I hadn’t fully forgiven Brian, just couldn’t bear to lose another one of my best friends and Brian was…is my best friend. We pulled up to the church and I felt my breath hitch as I saw her. “The fuck is she doing here?” Brian sighed shaking his head.

“Tennessee and Savannah are here,” Johnny smiled getting out of Brian’s truck and I looked at Brian.

“Did you invite them?” I asked, hurt evident in my tone. “They have no business being here. Tennessee and Savannah I understand, but Casey? Seriously? Do you not remember that Jimmy hated her?”

Brian sighed looking in my eyes, “Em, I didn’t invite any of them. I think Zack invited Tennessee, but I don’t know about the other two.”

I nodded and got out of his truck swiftly and walked over to Matt and Simone, ignoring Casey. I wanted to say hello to Tennessee and Savannah because I hadn’t seen them in forever, but Casey…fuck her. Zacky walked up next to me and wrapped an arm around my shoulders protectively. “You okay?” He mumbled to me and I saw Casey smirk in my direction.

“I’m gonna slap that smirk off that bitch’s face if she keeps staring at me,” I mumbled back, knowing full well that Jimmy would approve.

Zacky chuckled, “Well I didn’t invite her, I invited the other two.”

I nodded, “Jimmy loved them, I understand them being here…” I watched Tenney and Savannah and saw a black haired, blue eyed boy run from Savannah’s side towards us.

“Landon, come back!” Savannah called to the little boy who looked to be about 2 or 3 years old.

I knelt down, something about this child seeming vaguely familiar. “Hey little man, what are you up to?”

“Do you know the guy?” He asked me curiously.

“You mean Jimmy?” I asked tilting my head as Savannah came up.

“My daddy,” the little boy nodded.

I was taken aback and looked at Zacky curiously then looked at Savannah, “His daddy?”

She nodded sighing, “Jimmy was his dad.” I felt my heart break, I knew that things hadn’t worked out with Savannah and Matt, but I hadn’t realized that her and Jimmy had hit it off that well. I looked back at the little boy in front of me who was trying his best to stay still but couldn’t help but bounce a little impatiently.

Tennessee came over to us and hugged Zack, “I see you’ve met my god-son.”

Zacky nodded, “I’m sorry, we didn’t know Jimmy had a son.”

Savannah blushed, “I asked him to keep Landon a secret one because of publicity and two because of Matt’s feelings.”

I nodded and gently picked up my necklace and showed it to Landon, “Your daddy gave me this. He was my best friend. I’m Ember.”

He smiled, his features lighting up, “You’re the girl we got that for!” He pointed to the necklace excitedly. “Mommy, I told you bout it!” Landon looked up at Savannah excitedly.

She smiled and picked him up as I stood up next to Zack, “I remember baby.”

“Mommy, where’s Lyric?” Landon asked looking around.

“Lyric’s not here sweetheart,” Savannah explained to him as we made our way into the church. I thought I saw Tennessee get a panicked look on her face but ignored it as we were face to face with a scene that I seriously wished we hadn’t.

“Yes of course it’s yours,” Casey rolled her eyes as she talked to Brian. Her arms crossed over her abdomen.

“Can we not do this here?” Brian growled obviously irritated.

“Why not here?” Casey said throwing a fit.

“Because I’m getting ready to bury my best fucking friend!” Brian yelled at her causing everyone to stop what they were doing and stare at them. I saw his ears and neck turn red. “Casey, you need to go. You can’t be here, I can’t do this right now. I need you to respect my wishes on this.”

“Fine, but we will be meeting up later,” Casey growled back shaking her head and walking out of the church.

Zacky tensed beside me, “Zack, what’s wrong?” I asked curiously.

“Nothing, has she changed something since the bachelor party?” He asked Tennessee.

“I don’t think so,” Tennessee shrugged as we took our places.

Notes

So Jimmy had a child with Savannah :) Wonder who Lyric is....Keep reading guys, only a few chapters left in this story, but don't worry there will be another Sequel. Thank-you to all my faithful readers who leave comments after every chapter. You guys really make my night :)

Also thinking of starting a vampire story...let me know what you think?

Title Credit: Find You -- Zedd feat Matthew Koma and Miriam Bryant (amazing acoustic version!!!)