Bekah

One Year, Three Months After the Shooting

I groan as I roll over on mine and Zack's bed. You'd think after sleeping alone almost every night for three months I would be used to it, but I wasn't.

"Three months down, three to go," I tell myself. "We're halfway there."

The morning was like any other. I woke up, got dressed, had coffee for breakfast and then headed to Vengeance University headquarters. Zack asked me to step up in his place while he was absent. Of course, he could manage the business on the road and he had on-site supervisors he trusted and actually knew what they were doing, so he didn't really need me. I think he just asked me to help out to keep my mind busy while he was away.

When I start to enter the building I can't help but think how quiet it is, which isn't normal whatsoever. I don't pay much attention to it as I walk towards Zack’s office to put away my things. I stop, however when I notice one of the rooms packed full of employees. I walked in to see what was going on. They're all staring at the television on the wall.

"What are you..." I start but the supervisor turned around with a crazed expression on his face.

"Bekah, what are you doing here?" He asked me.

I laugh awkwardly. "What are you talk..." And then I see what they are looking at.

"Breaking news here. I'm standing in front of I-45 in Texas and behind me you can see the tour bus for Avenged Sevenfold laid over on its and now on fire. A source says the band was headed to Houston to play at a musical festival when a semi ran the bus off the road. Reports say that there was one dead when paramedics and state officials arrived on the scene. We were in the middle of an interview with Sheriff Jonathan Riggs when the bus caught fire a few minutes ago."

"Now, Jamie, you said there was one death. Did anyone tell you if it was a band member or someone from the semi?"

"No," the reporter answered. "The semi apparently kept driving after the bus was run off the road. Officials told news crews that they will not be releasing the information until the family is notified. There were survivors of the crash and they were taken to the nearest hospital. State officials ask that the public respects the privacy of everyone involved."

I stopped listening but I couldn’t tear my eyes from the television. What if it was Zack? What if he was dead? What if...

"Bekah!" Someone called, jerking me from my thoughts. "What do you need?"

"What?" I asked. I didn't know what I needed. I needed to know if it was Zack that was dead but they couldn't tell me that.

"Do you need us to call some..." My phone began to ring. I searched frantically in my purse hoping, praying it was Zack or good news. I answered it without looking at the name.

"Hello?"

"Have you heard?" Valary cried.

"Yeah, I..."

"I’m packing a bag for Jackson. Where are you? I’ll pick you up on my way to the airport."

"V.U. warehouse," I tell her.

"Okay I'll be there in ten," she says and then hung up.

I didn't realize my heart could sink any further until realization hit me. If it wasn't Zack it could very well be Matt. And if it wasn't Matt it could be Johnny or Brian. I didn't wasn't to be any one of them be, but it was someone. And if it wasn't a band member it was still someone's friend, someone's family.

---

The plane ride was endless. The flight felt like days instead of hours. Valary had a car waiting for us at the airport. We didn't talk much and when I wasn't checking my phone for updates, she was checking hers.

"Have you heard from your sister?" I ask.

She shook her head. "I called her and Lacey but their phones are off because they're at that spa thing in Las Vegas." She was clearly annoyed.

"Well, at least we'll be there when they do call."

She nods. I can tell she's trying to stay strong for her son, for herself and maybe even me. I'm too busy to focus on my head not exploding with "What If's" to do anything else but worry. I couldn't wait to get to the hospital but at the same time, I didn't want to get here. I didn't want to find out that Zack was dead. I didn't know what I was going to do if I arrived and was told he's dead. I don't think I'll be able to handle it, to survive it. But I needed to know, even if I didn't want to necessarily.

When we finally arrive to the hospital Valary and I both groaned. News stations littered the parking lot. Valary mumbled something about privacy as we get out of the car and walk swiftly into the hospital with Jackson on Valary's hip.

"I’m Valary Sanders and I need to speak to a supervisor, please," she tells the first nurse she sees.

"Okay, one moment." She smiles at us.

I raise my eyebrows at the back of Valary's head, surprised at how she took control of everything.

A woman in scrubs walks up to us a few minutes later. "Hi, I’m Nancy, how can I help you?"

"Can we talk in private?" Valary asks. Nancy nods and leads us to a near-empty hallway.

"Okay, uh, this is going to sound off and I'm sure you've heard a lot of bullshit stories today. But I'm married to Matt Sanders. He's in Avenged Sevenfold and their bus was involved in a hit and run. We were told they were brought here so we would like to see them please."

Nancy looked at Valary like she was crazy. "I’m sorry, ma'am but I'm going to have to wait for someone to verify that."

"Can you at least tell us if they're okay?" I ask.

Nancy shakes her head. "I'm sorry, ma'am but..."

"No, listen here. We flew all the way from California on no information but a fucking new story because no one has called us." Valary says. She hands Jackson to me and I think she's about to fight the woman but then she starts digging in the diaper bag and pulls out her cellphone. She taps on it a few times before shoving it in Nancy's face. "This is Matt and I on our wedding day. And this…this is when our son was born." Valary flips through her photos for another moment and then pushes her cellphone back into the diaper bag. "Now, tell me if my husband is okay."
Nancy stares at Valary for a moment and then glances at me. I shrug at her. Hey, the woman should know better than to come between a woman and her husband.

"Okay," she nods. "Let me show you to a place to wait while I retrieve what information we have." Nancy takes up to a room that looks like a small office. "Have a seat," she instructs and closes the door behind her as she disappears.

Valary and I both take a synchronized deep breath as I try to lull Jackson to sleep, though I’m unsure how well he's going to sleep if we're told one of the guys are dead.

"I wonder why we haven't received a phone call yet." Val says.

I shrug. "I don't know. Maybe all the phones were left on the bus. I mean who remembers phone numbers, anymore?"

She nods but we both know it's a lame excuse. Valary doesn't have the chance to say anything before Nancy walks in.

"Okay," Nancy sighs. She sets down a few clipboards. "After the wreck, paramedics brought in five men. All were alive except for one who died on the scene."

"Okay," I say.

"Two of the five men that were brought in had their wallets with the ID's in their jean pockets," Nancy continues.

"What are their names?" Val asks quietly.

"There was a Jonathan Seward and a Matthew Sanders," Nancy reveals. Valary takes in a breath of relief. "Looks like your husband is fine, after all. Now, he does have a couple of broken ribs but that's nothing major. He was and still is unconscious, so they're doing a CT scan now."

"And the other two? The one's who didn't have ID?" I ask softly.

"She's dating one of them too," Valary explains.

"I'm sorry, but with Mr. Sanders and Mr. Seward unconscious I can't really identify them." Nancy gives me a sad look.

I groan. "Okay, but what if I show you a picture? Then you can just point out the guys that came in alive, or whatever." I told her. With Jackson asleep in my arm, I struggled to get my phone out of my pocket. I finally grab it and lay it on Nancy's desk. I unlock my phone and go straight into the photos. I click on the most recent picture I have of all the guys. It was taken the day they left for tour, three months ago. I showed her the photo.

She doesn't even look at it before saying, "I'm sorry ma'am. I'm really not allowed to give out much information unless you're family."

"Look, I am family, okay?" I raise my voice. Jackson stirs. "Just because I'm not blood or I don't have a ring on my finger doesn't mean I'm not family. So, please!"

She stares at me the same way she stared at Valary before. I’m contemplating handing off Jackson so I can run out of this room and hunt for Zack myself when Nancy finally looks down at my phone.

"Well, this man here..." She pointed to the photograph. "He was the one dead on the scene."

I didn't realize I'm holding in my breath until I see who she's pointing at. Suddenly, the air is pushed from my lungs as though I'm kicked in the stomach. And then I began to sob.

Notes

Ah shit. I brought Bekah back just to kill off Zack...or did I? ;) Find out in the next installment! Until then, don't forget to comment, vote and subscribe! Thank you so, so much for reading!

Title credit: Mest "Take Me Away (Cried Out to Heaven)"