My Stockholm Love

I woke up not knowing what happened or where I was; last thing I remember was getting high as a fucking kite at school in the bathroom. I sat up and felt the throbbing headache that was accompanying what felt like withdrawals. My whole body was tingling and restless, I looked around the room and realized something, THIS ISNT MY FUCKING ROOM! my mind screamed as the panic and nausea set in when I seen myself laying in an unknown bed.

I threw the covers off me of me as I struggled to get out of the bed and onto my feet. I failed miserably and clashed with the hardwood floor. Suddenly the door flew open and there they were, the assholes that fuck with me everyday. Jimmy was the first to help me up and I put my hand over my mouth and pointed as he basically carried me to the bathroom so I could empty the contents of my stomach.

He sat on the floor holding my hair back as I violently puked. I flushed and got up to rinse out my mouth before slumping back to the floor quivering the slightest bit. He looked at me and felt around under the bathroom cabinet before setting a tiny purple box on the floor. He sat against the door and pulled me into his lap.

"Do you want a little bit just to take the edge off?" he asked. I took a mental note of how soft and sincere his voice was, nothing like the way he had treated me before. I nodded my head and went down to roll up my sleeves when I realized I wasnt wearing clothes that belonged to me.

I gasped and grabbed at the shirt as he laughed, "Im the skinniest one of the bunch thats why you're wearing my clothes" he pointed to the shirt and bright colored shorts that were adorning my tiny frame. "If you wore Matts clothes, you might have drown under the fabric" he mocked. This caused me to laugh a little it before I pulled my arm up from the muscle shirt I was wearing.

He gently took my arm after everything was ready and kissed the vein before injecting just a little bit to get me that buzz I was begging for. As soon as he pulled the tourniquet off my eyes rolled back into my head and a low sweet moan escaped my lips. Everything felt like soft velvet and he handed the needle over to me. I took them and looked up to him, "I..I cant.. I cant do that to you" I stuttered. He took his hand and pulled up my chin so we were eye in eye, my blue/grey eyes stared into those ocean blues and he kissed me.

I was so nervous and the heroin was beginning to devour my mind, and I couldnt stop before realizing I was straddling his lap and smashing our lips together like our lives depended on it. I pulled back and moved a little off of him so I could get better access to his arm. My confidence soared as I pushed on the plunger and sent him spiraling into the darkness along side of me.

I moved off from his lap and he put everything away, hidden from the rest of the world. He sat against the bathtub and took me into his arms. I had always hated him, I despised him every inch of my mind, but after what just happened my body ended up craving him, his touch, his poison. The bathroom door opened and the first thing I was able to concentrate on was those green eyes, the ones that haunted me throughout the years at school.

Johnny, Brian, and Matt shoved Zacky out of the way and peered in at us with confused eyes. I went to stand up but my fucking body wouldnt work with me and I ended up falling in what seemed like slow motion. Matt caught me and swooped me up off my feet, taking me and setting me on the bed. I still had no clue where the fuck I was.

They all crowded on the bed with me and began taking their own drugs of choice along with some vodka. I reached my arm out towards the bottle that Zacky held and he handed it over letting our fingers touch for a second, the electricity zapped through my body and both of us snapped our eyes up and looked at each other for about 2 seconds.

"Where am I?" I asked after drinking from the bottle and handing it over to Johnny.

"My house" Zacky replied.

I took in my surroundings and things began to get even more confusing for me. "Why?" I questioned. "I thought you hate me why would you guys bring me here?"

"WE didnt bring you here" Brian stated, "HE did" he pointed at Zacky.

"She passed out in the bathroom, was I supposed to just fucking leave her there?" he spat back at the guys who just shrugged their shoulders.

I got up and grabbed my things as I started down the stairs down to the front porch as Jimmy and Zacky followed behind me. "You dont have to leave you know" Zacky said as he shoved Jimmy away and gathered me in his arms. He handed me some pills and a gatorade which I took without question. I asked for a cigarette and immediately Jimmy lit me one and handed it to me as we sat on the porch stairs.

I sat in between them with my head on Zackys shoulder while holding hands with Jimmy, and before I knew it Zacky pulled my face up and kissed me. I jumped up in shock and quickly began to walk to my house as the guys argued behind me.

Almost 30 fucking minutes later I finally found my way home and all hell broke loose when I walked through those doors.

Next thing I knew I was on the floor, bleeding from my mouth...not again...

Notes