There Is No Me Without You

I was woke with a start thanks to my mum barging into my room ranting and raving about the pool outside, "I didn't know we had a pool Gemma! Did you know? And that beach I love this place!" I sat up and looked at her "you didn't know we had a pool and that the beach was literally our back garden? Are you sure this is our house!?" I asked with a puzzled look, My mum nodded "of course it is I just didn't know we had a pool or a beach, I'm beginning to think I made the right move by coming here. Anyway get ready we need to go see our neighbours today" she was bursting with happiness, it made made smile as i watched her walk out my room with a bounce in her step. "Your mum is amazing by the way, living beside you will bring me many days of joy if that's you are woke up everyday." Brians voice fluttered into my ears, I looked over at the window and he was sitting on the window ledge smiling at me holding a cup of steamy coffee, I smiled back at him getting out of bed "ohhh nice jammas" he commented as I made the walk from my bed to the window, "Morning Brian" I greeted moving my hair out of my face. He handed me a cup of coffee "Here thought you might need this, milk two sugars?" I took the cup and looked at him confused "how did you know?" I asked I can't remember telling him how I liked my coffee "your mum was over introducing herself to us this morning, I offered her a coffee and she told me that it was your favorite, so I made you one." he looked at me again and smiled a brilliant white smile he really was something else "thank you for the coffee, I hope my mum wasn't a pain this morning?" I asked taking a sip of the warm goodness "nah she was cool, my dad and Susie loved her! They've invited you two over for dinner on Monday once we finish school. But, I usually have band practice that day so I said that we would go there first and then come home and eat, anyway get ready you have a lot to learn today. Oh and the guys are meeting us outside in half an hour so chop chop lovely. I'll see you soon." He winked and walked away. I sat there for a couple more minutes finishing off my coffee and watched the water of the beach splash off the rocks, this was a great way to wake up in the morning.I sat the now empty mug on my dresser as I quickly jumped into the bathroom and into a warm shower washing my hair and body, I only had like 20 minutes to get ready. One I jumped out I quickly dried myself and plugged my hair dryer and straighteners in letting them heat up before grabbing clothes to wear I settled for, a red and white striped t-shirt, black shorts and my black and red converse. I throw them on and looked at the time, I still had 15 minutes left. I quickly dried my hair which for some reason was doing what it was told this morning,Once that was done I ran my straightners throw my hair and applied some eyeliner and lip gloss and I was done all in record time. I picked up my mobile and the mug Brian gave me and walked down the stairs, the minute I reached the bottom the doorbell rang, I smiled right on time. I pulled the door open and there stood Brian with his hair and his eyes and his smile, behind him stood 4 boys and 2 girls. "you ready to rock and roll?" he asked all I could was nod I suddenly felt nervous, I was meeting a lot of new people, more people than I'm used to. He reached his hand out for me to take but instead I gave him his mug "no, give me your hand" he chuckled as I place my hand in his, he pulled me the door and smiled over at his friends then looked down at me I couldn't remember him being this tall "don't worry you'll look great and you'll be fine as long as I'm with you." that made me smile, "ok, Thank you" I mumbled as we got closer to the group of people he let go of my hand and stood next to me "hey guys, this is Gemma. She's new here and needing new friends and a tour of our lovely town. So be nice and introduce yourselfs" and with that Brian stepped back leaving me on my own, yeah so much for being there. "Hi Gemma, I'm Matt. It's nice to meet you. I'm looking forward to getting to know you better" He reached out and hugged me, I smiled he was massive, tall and muscular with cute dimples "Nice to meet you too Matt and likewise." I stepped out of the hug, and looked back at Brian and smiled at him. "Hey, I'm Zacky nice to meet you." He was soft spoken and had a little bit of a lisp, he had wacky hair which I loved and snakebite piercings. I smiled and nodded "I love your hair by the way!" he blushed and stepped back "thanks" he mumbled with a grin. Next was a really tall guy holding a smaller guy, "Hi Gemma! I'm Rev you can call me Jimmy since you're my friend and this little guy is gnomeo Johnny. Say hi Gnomeo Johnny!" He yelled swinging round for me to see Johnny's face which looked a bright red/purple colour "Hi Gemma" he strained and managed a cute little smile before Rev or Jimmy ran off with him, "will he be ok?" I asked as I watched them run around the street "yeah they will be fine, Jimmy is just a little crazy in the head sometimes and Johnny is easy to wind up. I'm Val, Matt's girlfriend. Its great to finally meet you Brian hasn't stopped talking about the girl next door. Oh and this is my twin sister Michelle. Chelle c'mere and say hi!" Val yelled over to her sister I looked over to where she was standing next to Brian she looked upset and Brian looked annoyed, I wonder what happened there. Michelle looked over in my direction and smiled but I could tell it was put on, she must have been really upset about something. I watched as she walked over to us Brian pulled a weird face at her as she turned her back which caused me to laugh making Michelle turn round and look at Brian who shrugged at her, once she looked back towards me Brian held his finger over his mouth telling me to shush then winked. "Hi, I'm Michelle. I'm Brians girlfriend. Nice to meet you" she almost said it with a hint of warning to her tone, I looked at Brian and then back at Michelle "Nice to meet you to Michelle. I didnt know you were Brians Girlfriend I suppose he left that part out last night." I said loud enough to catch Brians attention, I must admit I felt a little of Michelle, Brian was a handsome boy she landed lucky. I had the feeling she didn't like me much though, but there was nothing I could do about it Brian wanted me to be his friend as well as the other so I was going to be a round for a while whether she liked it or not. I had no beef with her I only just met her but I knew deep down she would try and make my living here miserable. She looked at Val and then stormed away towards Brian again "look don't take anything she says to you to heart. Her and Brian are on and off more times than a prossies knickers." I laughed at that, I thought it was only us Scots that used that term, "thanks for the heads up" I replied and walked over to where the rest of the guys were standing "So where to first?" I asked and soon regretted it as they all gave me a mischievous look.

I must admit the tour wasn't as bad as I thought it was gonna be, they took me to the beach and down the pier and along the harbour where all these little shops were set up. It was really nice and everyone was so genuine and loving, I couldn't believe how nice the people were here. In Glasgow if you looked at someone the wrong way you would get stabbed! "So what's it like in Glasgow?" Zacky asked as we all sat down at one of the little benches outside a coffee shop "well Zacky, it is rough. It's always raining, there is a fight every other weekend, you see blue flashing lights every half hour. So yeah its good to be out of there. It's so different from here" I finished taking a sip of my juice which to be completely honest wasn't that nice. "Fuck, sounds tough. Can you teach me a few of your Scottish words?" I laughed and nodded "tell me what you wanna know give me a few things to translate for you" by this time everyone was sitting listening into the conversation "you tell me what you say then translate for us." I nodded and thought about it "Ok, well there is. Mockit, bogging, rank, guff, minging, and clatty meaning either dirty or smelly, he-haw means nothing, nae bawhair means ok or no bother, malky means a head butt, square go mean fight, patter means the way you say and use your words. I lived in the UK but Scotland had a language all of it own, I can't think of anything else but one thing I can tell you is, your juice is stinking thank god I stacked up on Irn-Bru before I got here" I smiled at all the confused faces looking back at me, "woah, that was complete gibberish to me! but I liked it! you have to teach us more!" Jimmy chimed in as he sat down across from me "The best way for that to happen is if I say something you don't understand and I'll translate for you, deal?" I smiled and put my hand out in front of me Jimmy looked at it and grabbed it "Deal GemGem" he shook my hand and then got up and ran towards the coffee shop, it went quite for a while so I took the time to look around at the people I have just met,. There was Matt and Val who were the sweetest couple I'd ever see, Matt looked at her like she was the only woman on Earth, then there was Zacky and Johnny who were lost in there own conversation, and last but not least Brian and Michelle, Brian looked pissed off and Michelle looked like she would explode at any minute, they were a little away from the rest of us. Michelle was facing away from him and Brain was facing the beach. I looked at Val and motioned for her to come closer to me "I'm going to go talk to Brian for a minute but I'm not wanting to upset Michelle could you help me?" I blinked my eyes at her and she smiled "sure, Michelle! Can you come help me for a minute?" she yelled and stood up and smiled at me I watched Michelle reach up to kiss Brian but he didn't move so instead she kissed his cheek and walked towards her sister. I made sure they were out of sight before I walked towards him, as I approached I could feel the anger radiating off of him, I was having seconds thoughts as to what i was doing but he looked like he need to let off some steam. I stood next to him and leaned my back against the railing he was leaning into, he looked really annoyed and deep in thought "you ok Brian?" I whispered loud enough for him to hear, he jumped a little and looked at me his features soften as he gave me a half hearted smile "yeah I'm...not fine, you mind walking with me on the beach?" he asked pushing himself off the railing and walking over to the stairs leading down to the beach "sure I don't mind." he held his hand out for me to take as he helped me down the stairs, we were quite as we walked along the beach which I didn't mind I enjoyed the view of all the dog walkers and kids building sand castles it was very therapeutic. Brian walked us to where the rocks were at the end of the beach near the water, the view was beautiful. Brian took his top off and lay it on the rock and told me to sit on it so I wouldn't get my shorts dirty. "You ever think if it's possible to love someone more than life itself?" Brain asked, I looked over at him his face was hard and sharp as he looked out towards the ocean I shrugged "I guess, depends on how much they love you back. Why?" I asked looking at his hands as he fidgeted with the ring on his finger "well you see that's just it. I love Michelle, but sometimes its just a struggle to be near her. She doesn't trust me at all, It's a constant argument everytime I talk to another girl. I trust her 110 percent but lately she's been acting more possessive than normal. I asked her what was bothering her and to be honest I already know the answer. She finds you to be a threat, she thinks I find you attractive and that because you live next door to me that I will end up leaving her. I dont know if I love her the way I used to anymore. I'm only 18 I dont need this kinda stress put on me as well as everything else! You know what I mean?" He looked at me once he was finished he looked genuinely troubled "Do you think she is right in what she says?" I looked down at my feet wiggling my toes through my converse, I felt him staring at me "I don't know, your a beautiful girl but I've only just met you. I've known Michelle all my life." He was still staring at me I looked up at him and his eyes bore into mine with intensity I got a weird feeling in the pit of my stomach, "It's not about how long you have known each other it's about how much love you feel for them. Love is a two way street, you have to have trust in both sides for it to work. If you trust her but she doesn't trust you then make her trust you. Show her you love her. Instead of arguing with her when she's upset hold her and tell her she's the only one, thats all shes wants to hear. I'll back off, I don't want to upset her." I was giving him the best I had there was nothing else I could say I didn't know his relationship well enough to say anything else, I felt his finger wrap round my pinky I looked at our hands then up at him "I don't want you to back off, I like you. I want to get to know you! Michelle has to learn that I can have friends outside the social circle I'm in just now. I'll try doing things your way though, sounds a lot better than arguing all the time. Thank you Gemma you're a great friend! C'mon let's get going before they start looking for us" He smiled brightly at me and pulled me up, and we walked back towards the pier to join everyone else. Brian put his arm around my shoulder "You know mockit and clatty sound repulsive, do you really use those words?" he asked looked down at me with a look of disgust on his face I laughed "aye we do, we tend to make words up to replace the actual word, we also shorten a few words too" I replied, grabbing his hand that was draped over my shoulder to keep my balance he laughed "no kidding, tell me a story about today using your slang" he said sounding intrigued, "Ok then. The day I met a boy and his 6 pals, they tane me oan a tour of the toon and then tane me tae a coffee shoap ware Zacky ast me to teach um sum ae my scoatish wurds, then a hid to comfurt ma pal Brian coz he wis huvin wummin problims. Noo he's gitting me eh talk scoatish tae um and he prolly disney no whit um sain the end" I grinned and looked at him as he shook his head "Nope I have no idea what you just said, sounded foreign to me. You have a horrible language" he laughed causing me to laugh with him "shut up! Scottish is the best language ever!" I playfully hit him. It was then we all heard a high pitch scream "I fucking knew it! I knew you would leave me for that skank!" Our head as well as everyone elses shot to where Michelle was standing at the top of the stairs, I could imagine what this would've looked like and if I was a jealous girlfriend I would be acting the same way but she wasn't calling me a skank when all I was doing was helping a friend! I pulled his arm off my shoulder and he didn't look happy with it at all "Michelle, stop, we were only talking to each other" Brian defended as we made our way up the stairs "It doesn't look like it Brian, it looked more like a cozy little romantic walk on the beach to me" she yelled, I screwed my face up and shook my head as I reach the top of the stairs, the whole group was watching. It was embarrassing and it made me look bad. Brian wne to open his mouth when I jumped in front of him "Look Michelle, I have no need to steal Brian away from you. He asked me to go a walk with him I agreed we talked about my family and that was it! If you don't trust him to be around other girls how are you going to manage to keep him in your life? You're either going to make shit up in your mind and ruin your own relationship or he's going to walk away from you! Take your pick and leave me out of it!" I snapped, she looked taken aback but I wasn't going to allow her to diss me and make me out to be something I am not. "Whatever, I'm leaving" and with that said she stormed off, Brian put his hand on my shoulder and squeezed a little before walking past me "Matt make sure Gemma gets home ok" he yelled as he took off after Michelle. I looked over at everyone preparing for the worse but instead they all started laughing and patting me on the back even Val was smiling at me "well done, about time someone stood up and put her in her place!" Matt laughed, I smiled and sat down beside Johnny "thanks but I don't want any one hating me, she just needed to take some time to think before jumping on me like that!" I defended, Val shook her head "No not all honey, no one hates you what you done was a good thing. They will now go home and work shit out and tomorrow it will be right as rain again" Val seemed so happy all of the time and she seemed so easy to get on with I knew we would become good friends. All of the guys were easy to get on with too I was happy I was introduced to them they spoke to me like I had been part of their group for years, it was a welcoming feeling. "Right we need to head, Jimmy and I are going to the juniors baseball game my little cousin is playing today and we promised we'd go watch him. So Gemma, again it was great meeting you! I'll see you all later" Zacky waved goodbye as Jimmy hugged everyone including me "Bye GemGem" he yelled as he swung me around "bye Jimmy, Bye Zacky!" I shouted so Zacky could hear me too "yeah were going to go too, we will see you at band practice on Monday right Gemma?" Johnny asked giving me a hug "yeah Brain will be bringing me, his dad invited me and my mum in for dinner so I will be with Brian anyway. So I'll see you then Johnny" I hugged him back and watched as he left It was just me Matt and Val left "well we will walk you home Gem, we have uhm homework to do" Matt said winking at Val, I chuckled "I'm sure you do" I replied nudging Val and winking at her it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what kinda homework they would be doing. We walked home laughing and joking about some of the things they got up to and some of the trouble they have been in and how Jimmy is the glue to the whole group which wasn't hard to tell from what I have seen today! By the time I got back home it was getting dark out, I said my goodbyes to Matt and Val and walked into the house.

When I got in the house I saw my mum sitting in the middle of the living room floor with a empty bottle of Vodka at her feet "Mum you ok?" I asked knowing full well that it was ok this was one of those rare occasions my mum lets everything get to her and blames herself for my dad's death, "I could've helped him Gemma, I should've tried harder" she slurred as she bawled her eyes out, I approached her and picked the empty bottle up and sat it on the table "c'mon mum you know as well as I do that there was nothing you could do, you done all you could!" I said as I picked her up off the floor, and walked her to her room as she cried her eyes out on my shoulder, I hated this part, she would withdraw herself for a while and just be completely emotionless for days. It would take me atleast a week to have a normal conversation with her. As I passed my room I looked in to see Brian sitting on his window ledge, I must of caught his eye as he looked over at me with a look of concern on his face, I just shook my head and continued to my mums room. Once I got her into the room that's when it went from bad to worse I sat her down on the bed and turned her lamp on helping her into the bed "Gemma, I know you hate me for everything I have done, and for not saving your dad! But there was nothing I could do I had to pull the plug! I hate myself I really hate myself!" she shouted so loud that I was sure the street heard her "Mum that is enough! I don't hate you! It was nobody's fault, I love you just as much as I love my dad and that won't ever change! So stop with this! It's not just you that is hurting here I am too!" I yelled back I could feel the tears well up in my eyes, "Fuck off! you heard me Get to fuck outta my face!" she yelled at me, that was enough for me. The next few days were going to be the hardest, I walked to my room closing it and leaning against it I looked at Brian and that was enough for me I slide down the door and burst out crying "Gemma" I heard Brian whisper before I felt arms wrap around and lift me up I opened my eyes and saw Brain looking down at me with a frown "you're ok, I promise. I'm here" he cooed as he lay me down on the bed, he came up and laid next to me putting his arm around me and pulling into him "you don't have to say anything, just let it out. I'm here" He whispered as he rubbed his thumb across my arm, I didn't know if I was crying because of my mums melt down or the fact that Brain was here caring for me, he was totally living up to the best friend role. "thank you" I whispered as my eye grew heavy. The last thing I heard was Brian saying "What are friends for" whilst kissing the top of my head, soon darkness surround me and all I could hear was Brians heartbeat.

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