From All Ends

**fast forward**
I had one more concert, tonight was it; I wasn’t fortunate to be able to see Matt again after being in Colorado as my schedule changed. My parents and my brothers had just pulled up to the venue in Knoxville telling me they got rooms at the Marriott down the road and we would head home tomorrow. As I was talking to all my brothers except for Trace who hadn’t shown up yet my phone rang and I saw it was Matt so I answered and walked away. “Hey Mattie, how are you?” “Fine babe, just miss you. When are you coming home?” “Few weeks yet, probably mid to late July.” Matt groaned on the other end, “But Brae,” He whined, “Mattie, you will be fine. I promise you.” “We go back on tour the beginning of September, I want to spend more than a month with you before we go.” “Matt, quit, seriously. I want to spend time with my family, plan a wedding, I’ll be in Cali before you know it.” I heard nothing, just silence on the other end, I called for him a few times and still heard nothing so I ended the call and new that it was about time for me to get on stage so I quickly got ready and headed out to get set up. It didn’t look like Matt was trying to get back in touch with me so I just shut my phone off and proceeded to have a great last concert. After the concert was over I talked with my family and greeted some fans that were allowed back before heading to change, pack up, and head out. I turned my phone on and immediately it started vibrating out of control, “Looks like someone was trying to get ahold of you,” I turned around and saw Trace, he was always my favorite brother, I just squealed and jumped into his arms. “I didn’t think you were coming!” “I was late, I got her as your first song ended; you know I wouldn’t miss it.” “But I heard that Sarah was sick and you had to stay back.” “She’s fine; she can’t wait to see you.” Trace and I made small talk while I finished packing stuff up and headed out backstage to see if they needed help loading up. “You going to look and see who blew up your phone?” “Probably just Matt, he’ll be fine.” Erik came up and asked me to get what I needed off the bus and he would make sure the rest of it gets to my home in Cali, once done I gave him a hug and told him I’d see him later and headed to my parents SUV so we could get to the hotel. Once in my room I looked at my phone and saw I had 34 notifications; most from Matt, one from Trace, and a few others from Brian and four from my friends back home. Saw that Trace was telling me he was running late, my friends just telling me that on June 28th they would be bombing my house to start the “hard” wedding planning, one told me she would see me on the 26th. This gave me four days to relax and see my family before seeing my crazies. Brian was just asking me what happened when I talked to Matt and to give him a call. Finally I looked at what Matt was about, 12 missed calls from the time I shut my phone off to the end of my concert, the rest asking me to call him, saying he was sorry for spacing out, and other random shit. The next day we headed home and for two hours just talked about anything and everything that happened since March. I texted Matt and told him I would talk to him later and once we got home I threw my stuff in my old room, put my phone on my bed, and headed out to the barn to see my horses. The next few days I hung out with my family, almost completely ignoring my phone, not really paying attention to who called or texted; it didn’t seem like many people were which was fine by me.
On the 28th I started making some pitchers of mixed drinks and snacks since I knew the girls would be flooding in around 11. My mom helped me put things on the deck and then told me she needed to run to Knox and would be back around 3 or 4. I started catching up with the girls as soon as they arrived, “So, who’s Matt?” Timberly asked, “Why are we drilling me? Shouldn’t we be planning a wedding?” “It’s my wedding planning; we’ve heard all about Brian and the tour and almost nothing about Matt.” She responded. “Fine, then we are planning! What do you want to know?” I asked. “You know the basics, what does he look like, what does he do; shit like that.” I reached into my pocket and pulled out my phone, I was trying to get a hold of Matt earlier but he must have been busy. I brought up a couple of pictures that we took at the beach and watched their faces as they saw him. “He sure has a lot of tattoos.” Carlin said, “Doesn’t look much like the boys you go for.” “I agree; definitely no cowboy.” Layla chimed in. “How did he snag you?” Kimberly asked. “Looks hot.” Timberly said, “If I wasn’t married…” “Ya, he’s different than my normal type, and I didn’t expect it, and I tried to make sure nothing happened but he sure is persistent. He’s in a band and we met through Larry; you better believe Larry tried to tell him it wasn’t worth it but he didn’t listen. He’s sweet.” “If you say so. Anyways let’s get to planning.” Kimberly started pulling out magazines and note books, I shared a knowing look with Timberly; I knew it wasn’t over with her, she was my closest friend and I knew she wanted more. After about three hours of talking about wedding stuff we had most of it figured out. She didn’t need to talk about any of it with her fiancé because he didn’t care so much and was off getting ready for training camp. Timberly was getting married to a guy she met while going to college, they lost contact, but while I was getting my name out there I was cheering for the Tennessee Titans they ended up meeting again. The wedding was to take place the end of October, during the bye week and they would honeymoon after the season was over. We knew where it was going to be since we called and confirmed. We were getting ready to call a bridal shop and get in over the weekend to find her dress, and another to get bridesmaid dresses when I heard the front door open with heavy footsteps. I assumed my mom was home and the boys had followed her. “Berries, you have yet to tell us who is the maid of honor and the wedding colors.” I told her, “Bug…” She cut off as the back door leading to the deck opened; I turned around about to tell the boys to leave us alone when I saw Matt step out. “What? OMG, what are you doing here?” I got up and gave him a hug, He leaned down to whisper in my ear, “We weren’t really communicating, your mom got your phone and answered, she invited me here.” I pulled back and looked at him just giving him a smile, gave him a quick kiss and lead him over to the girls. “Matt, these are my friends, Layla, Carlin, Kimberly, and her twin sister Timberly.” They all said hi and then Timberly started packing up saying we’d see each other on Friday at the bridal shop. I walked them to the door and then went back to Matt. “Not that I’m not I’m not happy to see you, but what are you doing here?” “Your mom answered the phone when I called, I just wanted to talk to you because I kind of went idiot on you when we actually talked last and then you barely answered my texts. You know my one fear with you is that you’ll pull away from me and I’ll never hear from you again. It wasn’t easy to get you and you know that I love you.” “I know Matt; I have trust issues and you know that. It’s hard for me to be in a relationship with things that I have gone through; one day I’ll tell you everything but not now. Now what happened last week?” “You said wedding; I hadn’t heard you mention anything about someone getting married and I guess I went stupid into thinking you were talking about us.” “Ya, not going to happen for a while. How long are you out here for?” “Well today’s the 28th, I would like to be out here for your birthday, but I don’t know.” With that I got a bit nervous knowing that tomorrow not only was my year oncology appointment he would be here for the results- good or bad. I looked up and saw my mom in the window, she knew that he didn’t know, she wanted me to tell him so I would have someone to go to the appointment with. “That’s great Matt; I do need to tell you something, please don’t let this change anything.” He took a deep breath but motioned for me to continue on. I explained to him about what was going on tomorrow and what happened when I was little. He took my hands in his, “I’m here for anything, and this is nothing no matter which way it goes. I love you; I would do anything for you. I think I understand now the importance of you coming home every year and I want you to know that I will always be with you through this. I won’t let you be alone. I hope you understand this.” After that we caught up a little more then I took him to my room so he could unpack a bit before the boys came over for dinner. The next day we headed to Knox where my oncologist was and proceeded to do the exam and work up, we got a hotel so we could get the results the next day before heading back. The next day we were sitting in the exam room when my doctor walked in looking defeated. “Braelynn, let me be honest with you,” Tears instantly started streaming down my face, nothing is ever good with that sentence, Matt wrapped his arm around my shoulders as the doctor continued, “PET scan looked good, which is great, but the blood work not so much, white blood cells are down, neutrophils are almost nonexistent. It doesn’t mean the cancer is back, it could just mean the setback we had a few years ago, in 2000. Let’s start the medications as we did then, I will need you back here next week for a recheck.” I just nodded my head and he walked out. Matt wrapped me up in his arms and once I was calm enough we scheduled my follow up and he drove us back home.

Notes

I'm trying to update, it's hard with school and work. ENJOY