Selena’s POV

I sat on Matt’s couch while flipping through his movie collection, we had been spending the last day in his bed… and I mean really in his bed all day all night, just us two of us and it had been amazing, nothing but amazing.

I was falling for this guy, fast and hard, and I knew I shouldn’t. Not after I just had been crashing down face first with my betraying asshole of ex-fiancé.
“Why the worried face?” Matt appeared next to me, handing me a coke and I tried a smile.
“I was wondering how I could feel so good with you in such a short amount of time” I said and Matt’s smile grew.

“I know that feeling, had the same. I mean, I wasn’t even searching for a girl and then I ran into you, or rather I ran after your bag and bang you had me…” He said chuckling and I had to admit that it felt already like an eternity ago, yet it was only a couple of weeks.

“What’s gonna happen when I have to go back? I mean… are we going to keep this up? What is this for you?” I finally asked, I wasn’t sure how he would react, would he think that I was stupid to even ask that, he still was a rock star, he was famous and I was just someone he barely knew.
“Were did that come from? Do you have second thoughts?” Matt looked a little stunned and I didn’t know how to answer that.

“I just want to know what this is to you… It’s not about second thoughts or anything. I am just coming from a bad experience and I don’t wanna get burned again…” I said and I knew I was ruining the good mood we were in these last days but Sam and I wouldn’t be staying here forever and I better knew where I was at right now then wait longer and loose my heart to this guy completely and get it back in broken pieces…

“I want more of you, Selena. I like the time we spend together and honestly I don’t wanna think about the things that come in the future I like the here and now pretty damn much, can’t we just figure things out one by one?” Matt asked and I sighed, was he backing out of this right now?

I sighed, maybe I shouldn’t have said anything and just gone with the flow for the next days, but it was so hard to stay distanced, when this man was everything but perfect and especially in his treatment with me.

“Babe, don’t shut down now. I can see in your face that you didn’t like my answer.” Matt took my hand in his and stroked his thumb over my palm.
“I just don’t know what to tell you exactly. No matter, what I tell you, you wouldn’t believe me or it wouldn’t be the right answer anyway… so why don’t we wait and see?” He asked again but then he shook his head, “What do you think this is? Or what do you want from this?” He asked turning the question around and I sighed setting my coke down on the table before me.

I turned to Matt and looked deeply into his eyes “I know that I want more of this, too. I want to spend more time with you, but I also know that I will have to go back. That this may or may not end, but if not, we both have to work for it… I still have some open things left home and I have my shop… And you… god, you have your band here, your family here… this big ass house, you have everything here… and I honestly don’t know if this should and can go on with us…” I finished and Matt frowned.

“Why would you think that? Everything had been going great, or?” He asked and I nodded “Yes, it had, maybe too good… damn Matt, I have no idea… Everything is so confusing, but believe me I want it… I want it bad…” I admitted finally and Matt sighed “Me too… Just give us a few more day and then we will figure it out, okay? I know we can figure it out.” Matt pulled me onto his lap and his lips gently moved on mine and I sighed into out kiss, we would figure this out… hopefully.

Brian’s POV

The day went by so fast and I didn’t really get the chance or opportunity to talk to Sam.
Actually no, that wasn’t right.
I could have talked to her and I could have found the opportunity, but I didn’t dare it.
I was afraid of the outcome, I had planned everything into it’s very detail the day before and I wanted to then, but I couldn’t now.

All my courage had left me and I could only think off the way she would push me away, especially after yesterday.
I couldn’t find the right words, not even in my head. I just didn’t know how to explain myself, how to tell her just what I felt for her…

It was evening again and we were trying to ignore the other all day, we had been saying the most necessary words but nothing more, we weren’t even mad with each other or anything, just distanced, we both were far away from the other…
I knew why I was dancing around the subjecy but why was she distancing herself so much? Was it really because of the scene in the restaurant or was there more to it?

If there was more to it then why didn’t she talk to me? Why was she pushing me away, I just… I just wanted her, needed her… and to achieve that I had to talk to her.

“Do you want to go outside to have dinner?” I finally asked and Sam looked at me over the rim of the book she was reading.
“Sounds good” She said and put the book aside “I will quickly change.” She said and I stopped her when she was about to walk past me.
“You look beautiful, you don’t have to change.” I said brushing a strand of her hair from her face and she laid her cheek into my palm, then her eyes snapped open and she pulled away, as if she caught herself doing something she shouldn’t.

“Sam? Are you okay? Is there… Is there more that broke between us? I didn’t mean to do that, really. I swear to you, to everything… that I didn’t want that and that you are as important to me as ever.” I said and she nodded.
“No, I just need to think a little more… I’m sorry, Brian really.” With that and a little panic in her eyes she vanished into the bathroom.

When she came out again we went to have dinner, we sat there and made a little small talk, whenever I directed our conversation back to a serious topic or even when I tried to remind her about how much fun we had during my stay with her, she blocked it. She wouldn’t even let me guide her into the direction I wanted… when all I really wanted was to tell her that I loved her, but she wouldn’t let me… as if she was afraid to hear it.

When we were back in the hotel I sighed, I went to the bathroom taking a long shower and tried to think of a final plan. 2 Days, I just had two days left before I had to convince Sam that I loved her and that my feelings for her were true and that she in return would mention any of her feelings…

But right now I wasn’t sure if there were any from her side… when just maybe two days ago I had been sure there was love between us… and now all gone? Could that be?

I heard a phone ring and moved towards the door, I didn’t really want to eardrop but I couldn’t stop myself from listening in either.

“It’s okay. Yes, really… no… actually it didn’t go as planned. Since when you do you know about the date anyway? Was everyone involved?” Sam asked and I knew that Selena must be on the phone.
“Yes, of course.. how could I think any other way…” She chuckled a little and then sighed.

I opened the door a little wider so I could see her “I don’t know… It’s complicated, Selly. I wished you were here… can’t we meet?” She asked and sounded desperate… I haven’t even thought how bad she was really taking all this, shit maybe this was all doomed even from the start…

“Okay, no.. you are right. Don’t worry… I will just, yes. We will see us tomorrow… Say hi to Matt for me… have fun.” With that she hung up and did I see a tear roll down her cheek, my heart was breaking for her and I regretted that I was the one to put her threw all this.

I opened the bathroom door so she saw me but she didn’t turn around, I moved up behind her and pulled her into my arms without any other word. I leaned down and whispered in her ear that I was sorry, that I wished I could help her, that she did nothing wrong, that whatever it was that was hurting her, I wished I could take it away and banned it from her life, that I wanted to be there for her no matter what it would take… I wished I could.. I just wished… I could.

Notes

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