I Wish I Could be the One

"Hey babe, how my was princess' nap? Johnny said as Jimmy and I walked into the small bar known for serving minors with awful fakes.
"Johnny you know how much I hate when you call me babe" I said to him remembering everything that happened that night, the first time he called me babe.
"Haha oh but you don't mind the princess?" Johnny replied with a smile
"Of course she doesn't for she is a princess! Ruler to the Kat kingdom just yonder!!!" Jimmy said as he stood on a bar stool pointing across the bar.
"Haha thanks Jimmy, I'm honored" I said to Jimmy with a curtesy.
Johnny was just looking at me, well staring really and I didn't know why. Was he thinking about what I had been thinking about the entire way here? It was so long ago but we also never talked about it. Maybe Johnny wanted to now, because the look he was giving me was the same look he gave me that night before I kissed him in the hallway outside my door. And he never gave me that look again after Brian knocked on the door looking for him. But why now? Why!? He could see I was beginning to wander in my thoughts and get lost in his eyes so I quickly looked away only to see Zacky walk in with...great, Brian.
I ran across the bar and threw my arms around Zacky
"Hey big bro!" Even though he was only a few hours older.
"Hey Kat, long time no see."
It actually was kind of a long time I hadn't seen Zacky in like a week which was odd considering I spent all my time with his friends. Well lately Johnny, I guess that's why.
Brian being the charming nonchalant guy he is put his around my back and give me a friendly kiss on the cheek with a "hey kit Kat". I could see out of the corner of my eye Zacky giving him a glare.
I knew Brian was already buzzed, he never does that unless he is, and I could tell this was going to be an interesting night.
"Johnny told us you and Jimmy knocked out earlier" Zacky said
"Oh yea I didn't realize how tired I was I guess, it was no big deal" I told him
Zacky put his arm around me "come on sis lets get a beer or something"
We all got some drinks and before we knew it we were drunk as shit. We switched from beers to shots. Zacky and I were laughing, reminiscing about my first couple weeks here last semester. Aka him beating up on the guys for various incidents, or introductions of me you could say. Jimmy, Johnny and Brian were bullshitting with each other. Which basically meant picking on Johnny because he was a shortest.
"Look Kat I wanna ask you something come over here" Zacky said to me in a whisper
I followed him to the little hallway where the bathrooms were around the corner out of sight of the guys.
"What's up Zacky?" I said to him curiously
"That's what I want to ask you. You tell me"
"What are you talking about??" I hated when he was so vague about shit.
"Kat..."
Zacky wanted to ask me something but seemed to be struggling with what he really wanted to say and I did not have the patience for it.
"Okay well when you know figure it out let me know" I gave him a pat on the back and began to walk away from him enough to see Brian and Johnny glancing over at us. He grabbed my arm and quickly pulled me back to where I was standing.
"Ugh fuck this is awkward. I’m just going to say it…Kat are you banging Brian?"
I felt my jaw drop open just a little, and I felt sick to my stomach. Was he serious? Where the hell was he getting this from? Even though we tell each other everything “Banging” and “Brian” were never things I imagined in a conversation with my brother. The look in his eyes indicated no humor and I knew that a can of worms had just spilled over. I hadn't hung out with Brian one on one since the computer lab and obviously nothing happened there.
Zacky saw my reaction and couldn't make sense of it, as usual.
"Brian kind of mentioned something about picking up some clothes from your room. Kind of sounded odd you know what I'm saying?"
Ha, god if Zacky only knew. If he was freaking out over some clothes, he sure as hell could never handle the truth about where Johnny was last year, the night we ran from the cops and him, Jimmy and Brian came looking for him. But this was definitely interesting, could I use this idea to make Johnny jealous? I mean if Zack heard that and it made him thinking something weird was going on between us maybe Johnny would too? But did I want that? But then again Zacky is just being protective of me so maybe it wouldn't work. But I know Johnny is more drunk than I am so maybe it would. Is this even a good idea? I felt like I couldn’t even handle a simple conversation. My thoughts were going a hundred miles a minute, and I felt my head spinning too. Or was it the room? Just the alcohol, I guess I hadn't eaten anything since before Latin. Damn you Jack Daniels.
"Zacky that's ridiculous" But was it? “I’m with Austin”
Had Brian already mentioned something to Johnny too? Is that why Johnny was saying that he would have to “tell Brian later”? What the hell was happening right now.
“Cut the shit Kat, I know you and Austin haven’t been together for a while, I just don’t know why you’re hiding it from us, especially me. Did he do something?!!” Zacky said as he was getting more and more concerned…over fucking clothes and “Austin”.
"You all have left something in my room at some point, Brian just never picks them up, just calm down okay mom?"
I didn’t even acknowledge his last comments, I just changed the subject. I wanted this conversation to be over, just like this night. My head kept twirling, maybe I just needed to lay down, this conversation and the one with Jimmy earlier was way too much to handle right now.
"Alright alright, but don't think I'm not paying attention Kat, I don't know if I'd like one of my best friends getting with my little sis. And by that I mean don’t even think about"
"Ba-arely little sis" shit I was fucking tired and dizzy I felt my limbs going numb.
"Okay come on let's go back over there...Kat you straight?" Zacky could see my body and face, clearly I was not straight.
"Ya ya. Just u--mm tired"
We walked over to the bar stools again shoulder to shoulder. I could see my vision begin to blur and my eyes burn…wait was Johnny yelling at Brian? And why did Jimmy seem to be holding back Brian? I felt my feet stumbling, my legs felt like jelly; damn I was more shitfaced than I thought. I don’t know how but suddenly I knew I had to hold on to something to get some balance. I reached out to the arm of my twin brother who was now a few steps ahead of me, but I only grazed it.
All I felt were my eyes roll back
"BABE!"
"Kit Kat! Zack!!"
All I heard was yelling that turned into muffled sound, and a blurred image slightly above me of the guys running toward me. Why did they look so tall? When did I get so damn short?
One hard loud thud that seemed to echo, and I was out cold.

Notes