Brian’s POV

It was really funny to think about it. How all my days revolve up and around sex, it’s like the first thing I do in the morning is greet my morning wood and if it’s a good morning, maybe I’ll jack off in the shower, if it’s a great morning – MJ will give me a blowjob, and man, did she know how to give head. I know Dice was a goddamn Harry Potter with her tongue, but MJ... man, let me tell you, that’s some different level of magic. I can imagine when we’re old and there’s a young teenager passing us, MJ’s all old and nice with her tats and what not and the kid, if he’s just as sick and twisted as was I in my teenage years, he’ll get to that one conclusion, where he realizes every person has had sex in their lives. He’ll look at MJ and think- what a cute old lady, probably choked on a dick at one point in her life. And that she did.

Why was I even thinking this? ‘Cause we’re going to Big Bear and I’m close to tears... A fucking sausage fest for three days. I’m gonna die... Sure, we all had to get away for a little bit, but come on guys, now? When I have a fucking girl worthy to call ‘the bomb’ at home, waiting for me in her wonderful high heels? You have to drag me now to big bear? Now of all the times?

At least I had this bottle of Smirnoff to ease the pain of missing her.

„You should go easy on that, you know,” Matt said from the drivers seat as I made myself more comfortable and took a nice mouthful of the disgusting liquor.

„You should fuck the hell off,” I scoffed, before taking a good gulp and screwing the cork back on. How did people actually drink this shit? It tastes like gasoline. And yes, I know how gasoline tastes like. Thanks to Jimmy and his lack of knowledge about cars and me pumping out the diesel fuel from his gas tank.

„Gates, believe me you can go without sex for a couple of days,” Matt said and I groaned. It’s not about sex anymore! Okay, I did enjoy every bit of it, but it’s not about that, it’s about not seeing her mesmerizing blues when I wake up in the morning; it’s about the breakfast we have together when I wake up and she comes in after her shift, and just maybe even the hilarious view of Dice flunking her arm around her neck and MJ dragging that crazy red in for her morning fix of chocolate chip pancakes and topping it with my expensive liquor. „I miss Dice too, man, but come on,”

„Dice is different,” I huffed, „You know Red,”

„What’s that supposed to mean?” He frowned, shooting me a short look, before fixing his eyes back on the road. What’s that supposed to mean? Well, I don’t think Red is sobbing her evening away in the pillow, thinking how badly it reminds her of Matt, the scent still strongly lingering in the air – no. She was probably drinking her night away with the regulars if not riding some hard cock. I swear, no matter what goes on between her and Matt, she will always be one of the closest persons to me, not in a sense you understand it. It’s like to love myself, Dice is a part pulled out of me and put on earth to show me the exact way Synyster Gates looks from the third person view. She isn’t quick to judge when it comes to me being a jerk and that’s why we get along so well. However the closest person to me and to my heart - the true love of my life as I realize right now probably is and always will be MJ. I still can’t quite wrap my finger around – why – but I just know I need her. She’s like that small, fragile threat that keeps me down on earth. Surpressing the need for me to simply fly away. „Gates!”

„Nothing,” I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose. Since when is he this touchy? „I just meant Dice can handle herself without you for a couple of days even if there’s a crazy bastard after her.”

Matt’s knuckles became white around the steering wheel. Oh... So he hadn’t thought this one through, had he... So I guess we’re going back early in the morning, huh?

„Oh Chill out, man, she can handle herself,” Sure, I tried to be an optimist about this all, which was the most dumbest thing I’d ever do, but I had to hope everything would just cool down and blow over, right? Had no idea what they were gonna do with the whole Dice and that Jay dude situation, but I just need to believe Dice was as good as everyone claimed and she’ll deal with it. Living happily ever after. As sickening as it may sound... unless MJ does something extremelly stupid and gets herself involved in the whole situation, then, I swear to god, I’d make her ass so blue she wouldn’t be able to sit for a week.

„I know...” He sighed, „I know, it’s just... we were supposed to go on this fucking trip to forget about everything back at home, but I just can’t seem to get her out of my goddamn head.”

„I know what you mean, man. The further we get, the more I long for MJ,” I said, picturing her wonderful smile in my head.

„What the hell happened to us?” He laughed almost sorrowfully, „When did we became this... this...”

„Whipped?” I chuckled.

„I didn’t want to use that word, but sure,” He smiled as he jerked his shoulders. „You wanna know how much Dice got out of me in that fucking strip club?”

„Not unless it involves three zeros.” I laughed, knowing that’s exactly how much Dice spent on strippers. I couldn’t quite tell MJ wasn’t also running that race, but the number of her expenses was a bit more decent, if we count out the dress and those killer heels.

„Oh but it does,” Matt rolled his eyes, „That girl is nothing, but expenses...”

„But you love her,” I looked at him only to see a smirk mirror on his face.

„That I do.” He replied, „But I’m still not sure how she feels about me.”

„You’re not sure?” My eyebrows jumped up. He was not fucking sure... The girl has stopped her wicked ways and hasn’t looked at any other guy since she’s with Matt and well, basically also when they weren’t together. He’s the only one she’s cried for... and of course her Mustang, but that’s a fully different story. „I’d say Red is the one who’s whipped in this situation,”

„You really think so?” Why the hell was he smiling? That was a tragedy! Dice becoming soft? That should be a big fat ‘no’.

„I know so.” I sighed, knowing if she’s whipped then... yeah, you got the point. I could joke about it – sure, but now, when the realization hit me how badly I needed and wanted the blondie... Hell, I was certain I’d do anything for her. Was I getting old? What the actual hell was wrong with me? I shouldn’t feel this way. But I did. And I couldn’t do anything to stop loving her.

The fact that we had pulled up to the cabin had somehow slipped me by, and I noticed it only when Matt turned off the engine and got out of the car. The place was really beautiful – a cabin in the woods and the lake being just a three minute walk away. Some not so great ideas had been born here, like self recording this fucking album, which seemed very fucking smart, genius almost, until the moment when it hit us what kinda amount of ourselves we have to put in it. But on the other hand – no one was pulling us by our strings, which was a nice change.

As I got out of Matt’s car and of course took the bottle of vodka with me, I couldn’t miss the fact that Vengeance was buried in his phone. Fucking always. What was he doing there? Watching some porn? Which was just plain stupid, why would you watch porn if you can’t jerk off or enjoy it with a hot chick who’s jumping up and down your dick. And that wide smile... All the fucking time.

„What the fuck are you doing, Vengeance?” I asked to see Jimmy gather all his stuff- like half eaten Big Mac’s and empty beer bottles – from the back seats of Zack’s car.

„It’s pretty obvious he has a chick,” Johnny walked around Zack’s car, pulling out the cork of a bottle of wine. That shit’s really gonna kill him one day. No, not the wine. The corkscrew.

„Yeah, Vengy there has been texting someone all week,” Jimmy smiled, checking the beer bottles for some last drops of booze holding them up above his mouth.

„He doesn’t tell us who, tho,” Johnny shrugged.

„Is that so...” I raised my eyebrow. I should really snatch that phone out of his hand and read those fucking texts out loud. Who on earth is he hiding from us? Megan Fox? If that’s the case – he’s hiding her for a reason, ‘cause each one of us slimy bastards would bang that chick.

„Because that’s none of your fucking business, dipshit,” Vengeance replied his eyes still on his phone as he blew out a small cloud of smoke.

„Come on, V, at least tell us her name,” I chuckled, leaning against Matt’s Escalade. Speaking of which, where did that asshole go to?

„No,” He grinned, sliding his phone in the back pocket of his pants. Right as I was about to open a new carton of Marlboro’s, Matt came from what it seemed like the cabin, his eyes also on the screen of his phone. Can we just, please, go these days without our fucking cell phones, would that be fucking possible?

„Hey, Shads, you know who’s Zack’s girlfriend?” I asked with a wide grin on my face.

„Have no fucking clue,” He said before raising his eyes from the phone, „Okay, now can we please get our shit in the cabin and just have a fucking great time?”

„Fuck yeah!” Jimmy screamed suddenly pulling a trash bag out of nowhere and stuffing all his shit in it, before throwing it back in Zacky’s car. What the actual... nevermind. He picked out a box of Jagermeister and rushed up the stairs.

„You knew he brought so much Jager?” I asked Matt with a great frown as he opened the backside doors of the car.

„No,” He rested his hands on his hips, „But that’s Jimmy. Obviously he brought a shit load of booze. You should know that... you’re his best friend.”

„No,” I rolled my eyes, „Dice is his best friend. And MJ.”

Matt turned his head to look at me with an amused smirk, almost asking if I’m jealous. „Look, put Dice and MJ together and you get Brian Haner/ Synyster Gates one time exclusive female version. And now quit being a bitch and help me with this shit.”

And before I knew it I was drunk off my ass, laying in the middle of the living room of the cabin while Jimmy was chugging down Jagermeister. Where were the other guys? Had no fucking clue, what I knew was I missed MJ and to think of it, I should probably fucking call her. Because that’s perfectly acceptable in this state of drunk...ardy? Is that even a fucking word...? But poor me... I had no fucking reception here. Stupid piece of shit phone! Where’s Zack when he’s needed? He’s always texting someone, so I bet his reception is just fine.

„Dude, I’m so fucking bored...” Jimmy whined throwing the empty bottle over the couch. „Where are the girls...” He let out a loud cry for what it seemed help.

„We’re not here to party Jimbo,” I slurred, strumming some chords on the guitar which was laying on top of me.

„This fucking sucks, man...” He leaned against the couch, tilting his head back.

„Tell me about it...” I rolled my eyes. I just wanted to be there, in Huntington Beach, holding MJ close and never letting her go... I should probably stop drinking vodka, turns me in a complete wuss. Sentimental in bonus.

„We need to get this fucking song done so we can go home and I can get laid,” Easier said than done.

„We don’t even have an idea for the song, Rev,” I took a deep breath, still playing the same pattern of chords, getting a sort of country-esk groove to it.

„yeah, you do... Look at the riff... now we only need words and we’re done,” I saw him smile. Actually? Maybe that was true. But about what can we sing? That’s when it hit me. I’m not the only one feeling like this. The whole band’s freaking out, wishing just to get this fucking shit done so we could be back at home with our loved ones.

„I left her when I found her and now I wish I'd stayed...” I took a breath, feeling the tears dwell in my eyes. „'Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired...I'm missing you again, oh no... Once again.”

Dice’s POV

Fucking two days off because I was already long over-due with the hours? Are you fu—and the whole Avenged wolf pack going to some stupid resort? In the middle of woods? Well what the hell am I supposed to do now? I had never been the one to sit at home, I needed to do something to occupy myself so I wouldn’t go mad, so that’s probably was the reason behind me sitting in Johnny’s and twirling the spoon in the cup of coffee. I couldn’t stay away from the bar for too long, so instead of sitting home, I decided to accompany MJ in her adventures. It wasn’t a busy night so she had even the time to chat with me. And ask me a shit load of questions of why I’m not drinking. Well... If I’m not working and Matt’s not my personal bank for the day, I don’t have the actual money to spend here, even tho I realize I could just drink for free. Or maybe I just didn’t want to get shitfaced and die in the morning... What the hell’s wrong with me?

„I even folded the laundry, can you believe it?” I fixed the fedora on my head receiving a chuckle from her. „That’s how fucking bored I was!”

„I didn’t know you knew how to do it,” She snickered whilst filling a pitcher with beer.

„Neither did I!” I exclaimed, warming my hands against the cup, „Do you wanna know what else I did?”

„What?”

„I moped the floors! Mopped the fucking floors...” I repeated with a roll of my eyes, finally bringing the white cup to my lips. Why did it seem so funny to her? It was a catastrophe, where have you seen Dice doing house work? That’s right – nowhere.

„Not to sound like you or anything, but you should clean the house more often. Maybe would find the lost treasure,” Not to sound like me? Did she mean like a stuck up bitch? Yea, ‘cause that’s what I was and that’s what she sounded like exactly.

„I’m the money maker! I’m no maid for crying out loud...” I mumbled, hiding behind the white cup. Besides, who the hell needed to live in a tidy place? I was fine with all the mess going on in the living room oh and don’t even let me start about the garage, since I’m kinda working on my car... yeah, ‘kinda’ slips away exactly how much I’ve done on it.

„Last time I checked I have the same wage as you,” She narrowed her eyes on me. Oh sorry, did I touch a string? Sorry, ‘cause I wasn’t in my best mood.

„Last time I checked you’re a slowpoke.” I mocked her, bringing a small chuckle out of her. Great, I wasn’t even capable of a good insult. What has Gates done to her? She’s completely unmoved by my ‘compliments’.

„Hey, sweetheart, can I get three running criminals, three B52’s and two Slumdogs?” MJ just eyed him, gaping.

„...you want what?”

„We’re out of Kahlua, so no B52’s...” I sighed, inspecting the shelves behind MJ.

„I’m sorry, I think I was talking to the bartender,” Okay, that made me turn my head and eye him with a raised brow. Rude much? He just kept glaring at me. Slowly I pushed myself off the stool and went around the bar.

„Now you’re talking to the bartender.” I crossed my arms, „And we’re out of Kahlua.” I said, before turning to MJ and whispering in her ear, „spit in his drinks.”

„I don’t even know what he wants!” She half whispered, half shouted.

„You know what’s a Slumdog?” She nodded, „Then make those, I’ll take care of the rest.” She nodded again and I turned towards the dude.

„So no B52’s, huh?” By then he was smirking.

„Yea,” I replied, clear frustration in my voice.

„How about dirty echo’s?”

„You have the slightest clue what are those or you’re just shootin’ for mere luck?”

„I’m in a bar. I’m here to get wasted. Make my drinks.” He said, still smirking. I shrugged, before the shot glasses came flying over the counter and the bottle’s of tequila and vodka armed my hands as I made his shots. A drop of absinthe, a drop of Jack, a drop of insanity and he’ll be puking his insides out. Did I forget to mention I added a little something that doesn’t go in the running criminal’s? A few drop’s of chilli sauce? That’s for being fucking rude to me.

„There you go, master,” I gestured with a bow towards the row of shots, MJ returning with those slumdogs. The phone buzzed in my pocket.

Get out of the bar! You’re not allowed there ‘till Friday. –Johnny.

Fucking party pooper... A loud groan left my insides as I walked back to my previous place. And saw MJ giggling over a text or something. I just hoped Gates isn’t sending her pics of his dick. „What’s so funny, cupcake?”

„Zack,” She giggled, walking up to me and showing me a picture of passed out Johnny and Jimmy who’s drawing a dick on his face. That was actually funny, but Zacky? Really, MJ?

„So... Does Gates know about it?” I asked innocently, wiping an invisible stain off my cup.

„Know about what?” She looked up at me with a small smile.

„Uhmm...” So she is as dumb as she looks. „Nothing,” I shook my head as I got off the stool, „But listen up, since this coffee tastes like shit, I have a new plan for the evening. Make me Jack on the rocks, a double preferably, and keep making them every ... four minutes. And keep sliding them to this end till I pass the fuck out, ‘cause life is too fucking miserable being sober.”

Notes