Chapter Twenty-Three:

I opened my eyes ten minutes before my alarm went off. Even with the drowsy meds, I slept for shit last night. I hate fighting with Jace. I can honestly say we really haven’t fought before. I mean, sure, we’ve had playful spats – who hasn’t? But this, this is something completely different.

I’m delusional if I think that his feelings are going to change overnight. I really wanted to believe that he was satisfied just being friends. Why do these things happen at the worst time?

It’s time like these that makes me wish that I had girl friends. Most of my friends are of the male persuasion. It’s just less drama that way. I hate drama. The female friends I have are Gwen and Denise and they’re not exactly my age.

I have no one to talk to about my problems with Jace. It’s weird.

I pushed my blankets off and eased myself out of bed. I walked over to my bathroom and took off my pajamas. I managed to get a bag over my cast and turned on the hot water. I got in and washed as quickly as I could. The shower was over before I knew it.

By the time I was dried off and dressed I was hurting. It doesn’t help that I tripped on air after putting on my socks. I slipped on my shoes and grabbed my meds and bag for school. I feel so crappy today. I put on some foundation and left my face otherwise bare.

I sat on the porch and waited for Matt to pick me up. Gwen insisted that I stay with her instead of an empty house. So, I did. But I really haven’t talked to Jace. I know it’s childish but I honestly don’t know what to say to him.

Gwen knows we’re fighting, but not what about. I raked my fingers through my hair and heard the front door open. I looked over and saw Gwen bringing me a cup of coffee.

“If you’re not going to eat anything, you need to have something in your stomach, baby girl.” She told me, handing me the coffee. She kissed my forehead. “What did my boy do?” She asked.

“How do you know it’s not something I did?” I asked her. She chuckled.

“A mother knows.”

“He wants something I can’t give him.” I told her, taking a sip of the coffee. She frowned.

“I had a feeling that’s what this was about.” She rubbed my back. “He’s cared about you for a long time, Angela.” She told me.

“I know. And it’s not that I don’t love him, it’s just a different kind of love.” I told her. She nodded.

“Give him time – he’ll come around.” She told me.

“I know. It’s just hard. He’s like my other half.” I told her.

“I know, baby.” She leaned in and hugged me. Matt pulled up. I got up and turned to give Gwen another hug. I saw Jace standing in the doorway. How long has he been there? He gave me a small wave. I nodded and headed out. I got into the passenger’s side of Matt’s ’67 Firebird.

“Hey beautiful,” he greeted. He leaned in and kissed my mouth, softly. I smiled.

“Hello handsome,” I answered, looking him over. He looks nice. Dark-washed, vintage jeans and a tight-fitting black shirt. Mm.

“You look tired.” He told me, holding my hand. I shrugged.

“I’m always tired, lately. It was just a rough night.” I told him.

“Is that why you wanted me to pick you up?”

“Yeah, Jace and I aren’t seeing eye to eye right now and I can’t drive on my medication.” I told him.

“Anything serious?”

“Nothing I wanna talk about. It’ll sort itself out.”

“Well, I don’t mind driving you.” He told me, backing out of the driveway.

“It’s nice seeing you in the morning.” I agreed. We fell into a comfortable silence. He turned up the music.

Never feared for anything, never shamed but never free.
A light that healed a broken heart with all that it could.
Lived a life so endlessly, saw beyond what others see…
I tried to heal your broken heart with all that I could.
Will you stay? Will you stay away forever?

I let gravity of the lyrics to sink in. They break my heart in a way that only music could. I’ve never heard anyone that sounds like this.

“Who is this?” I asked Matt. He smiled and didn’t answer me.

How do I live a life without the ones I love?
Time still turns the pages of the book it’s burned.
Place and time always on my mind,
I have so much to say, but you’re so far away.

“This is my band, Avenged Sevenfold.” He told me.

“I remember you telling me that you were good, but you never told me you were this good.” I raved. “This is, wow.”

“I’m glad you like it.”

“Like it? Music like this… Music helps people get through the pain. When you have no other release, there’s music to get you through. That’s what this sounds like.” I told him. He smiled.

“You’re so sexy when you talk music.” He teased. I rolled my eyes.

“Hush your face.”

-.-

School breezed by. I tried to forget about the fight with Jace and focus on the date with Matt. I feel giddy. Matt took me to Jace’s so I could change and get ready. Gwen decided to make small talk with Matt.

“Can we talk?” Jace asked me. I nodded. I had just shimmied into my violet skinny jeans. I turned away from him and put on a black camisole. I pulled on a charcoal, half-sleeved, button-down shirt. I finished off with a skinny, black tie.

“What’s up?” I asked him.

“I’m sorry for expecting you to change your mind when I knew how you felt. I don’t want to fight with you, Gel. I don’t want things to be weird between us.” He hugged me, softly.

“It’s water under the bridge.”

“Really?”

“As long as you’re being sincere.” I told him. He nodded.

“Do you need anything else?” He asked me, gesturing to my clothes. I pointed short-sleeved, black blazer.

“I feel so covered.” I complained. He chuckled.

“You normally are.” He mused.

“I know, but tonight is special. I just… This cast is awkward with everything. And my legs are bruised to hell.” I sighed.

“You look great.” He assured me. I snorted and sat down and started putting on eyeliner. I put on a bit of shadow and a little lip color before throwing in the towel. “Be careful tonight.”

“I will.” I told him. I walked down the stairs, slowly, very slowly. I made it down and saw Matt staring at me. He’s smiling; at least that’s a good sign.

“You look great.” He told me. I beamed.

“Thank you. Wanna head out?”

-.-

We ended up at some Italian place. He opened the doors for me and pulled out my chair. This is perfect.

“I’m glad you were able to come out tonight.” He held my hand.

“I wouldn’t miss it.”

“Are you really okay? I mean, with everything?” He asked. I nodded.

“I’m trying to be, sometimes that’s all I can do.” I told him. He nodded. “Actually, I was wondering if I could get a copy of your demo. I can pass it along to Jared, my dad. I mean, if you’re okay with it. I promised Zach I would.”

“That’d be awesome. I can definitely get you a copy.” He beamed. “We’ve got a few more songs recorded. I can put them on a CD for you and get to you tomorrow.”

“Awesome. He’s coming down to have dinner in a couple of days.” I told him.

-.-

We finished dinner and sat and talked for a little while. We held hands. It was nice to be able to enjoy his company. He always makes me so nervous.

“You wanna get out of here?” Matt asked. I nodded. He helped me up. We walked to the car. So far, so good. I haven’t had to take any medicine since we’ve been out.

“Where are we headed?” I asked him. He smiled.

“It’s a surprise.”

“Okay.”

The drive was quiet, but nice. We drove to a clearing just out a town and he pulled the car over. We got out the car and spread a blanket out on the ground. We laid down and watched the stars. I used him as a pillow.

“This is perfect.” I whispered.

“You’re perfect.” He told me. I giggled.

“I’m happy you think so.” I told him. He cupped my face and brought his mouth to mine. I melted in the kiss. Boy knows how to kiss. He kept moving his mouth against mine. I gasped against his lips. He slid his tongue along my bottom lip. I shuddered against him. Everything is so new with him. I don’t feel pressured or threatened. I love it.

I opened my mouth just enough to let him slip his tongue inside. I followed his lead. It’s pure instinct and feeling. I moved my tongue against his.

We stayed like this for what seems like forever. He moved his hand under my shirt and onto the small of my back. I froze. He pulled away and looked at me.

“Is this too fast?” He asked me. I shook my head.

“No, it’s okay.” I told him.

“I don’t wanna rush anything with you.”

“I want this.” I whispered. He nodded. “I want this with you.” I told him. This time, I kissed him. He moved his mouth to my jaw and planted soft kisses along my jaw-line to my neck. I moaned against him. He makes me feel so… alive. I’m not used to feeling this way.

I moved my hands under his shirt and traced his abs. He moved his lips from my neck to my ear. I couldn’t stop the noises he was causing to slip out of my mouth.

“I love your sounds.” He whispered. I shivered and kissed him, missing the feeling of him against me. My phone vibrated in my pocket. I ignored it and kept kissing him. The vibrations didn’t stop. He pulled away and felt on my leg. I’m guessing he could feel them too. “Check it – it could be important.” He told me.

I nodded and fished my phone out of my pocket. I checked out my notifications. I have ten new text messages. I opened my inbox. They’re all from Eric. I untangled myself from Matt and got up.

“I’ll be right back.” I told him. He didn’t question it. I opened the messages. They’re all pictures. The first one is of him holding a picture of me. The next is a picture of his hard on in his pants. They get progressively worse. He’s touching himself. I don’t want to see this. He’s with a woman who looks like me; she’s naked. She’s giving him head. He’s holding her head as close as he can get it. There is a picture of his face while he’s finishing. The rest aren’t any better.

I can’t get the pictures out of my mind. They’ve killed my natural high from Matt. I jumped when my phone started going off.

“Hello?”

“Hello Angel, did you like my pictures?” Eric asked.

“You know I didn’t. Why did you send them?” I asked him.

“I don’t want you thinking about any other man besides me. They’re just to remind you.”

“I don’t need a reminder from you.”

“I miss you, Angel.”

“I can see that.”

“I’ll be home before you know it.”

“Don’t hurry back.” I shot.

“Are you still seeing that boy? Do you need another lesson?”

“Does it matter? You can’t have me, Eric. I’m not yours. I’m not property. You only have a few months left, anyway.”

“That’s where you’re wrong, Angel. You are mine. If you play nice, I might let you keep your new toy.” He sang. It gave me goosebumps.

“It’s not your decision.”

“Everything that involves you is my decision.”

“Eric, I gotta go. Don’t call me again later.” I hung up. I’m shaking. God, why does he always affect me this way?

“Is everything okay?” Matt asked me. He put his arms around me. I know he can feel me shaking. “Shh, Angela, it’s okay. Who was it?” He asked.

“Eric,” I whispered.

“He can’t hurt you.” He told me.

“Not yet.”

“I’m sorry for ruining tonight.” I apologized.

“You didn’t ruin anything. We can try again tomorrow, something less maintenance. Eat at my house. My sister will be there.” He suggested.

“Okay. Can you take me home?” I asked him. He nodded. I want to cry.

Notes

Music Credit: "So Far Away" -- Avenged Sevenfold

I may not be able to post another chapter until next week, BUT I'm going to try. Getting married on Friday. This lady is friggen jazzed.