A Little Piece Of Heaven
A Case of the Mondays Part 2
Chapter Twenty-Two Part II:
I all but dragged myself into the doctor’s office. I’m. So. Fucking. Tired. I feel old as hell. I lost all momentum after we made it upstairs. I plopped down into a waiting chair.
“I’m so tired.” I told Jace. He just laughed at me. “It’s not funny. I need a nap.” I told him, but that just made him laugh even harder. His body doubled over with laughter. I shook my head. “Dick.”
“Last time I checked.” He shot back. I made a face at him. “Don’t hate.”
“You started it.”
“So, how serious are things between you and Matt?” He asked, suddenly becoming serious. I didn’t say anything for a minute. He caught me by surprise.
“Where did that come from?” I countered.
“You didn’t answer my question.”
“Why do you want to know?”
“If you’re not serious or planning on being serious than he’s just a waste of time.” Jace told me. I bit my lip. “If he isn’t serious about you, then he’s not good for you. You can find someone who is.”
“Someone like you?” I asked.
“Would that really be so bad? You know I love you, Gel.”
“Don’t go there, please.”
“Why are you so scared?” He asked me.
“Because I don’t want anything to happen to you or to us. I don’t want our friendship to change. It’s the only constant thing I’ve had in my life. I don’t know what I’d do without it. I can’t afford to go there. I don’t want to be alone.” I told him.
“You’ll never be alone.”
“And what happens when things don’t work out between us? You’re going to be okay just being friends?”
“I-I don’t know.”
“You can’t promise me something impossible. Why can’t you just accept that this is what I want? I need to keep things the way they are between us, Jay.” I told him.
“Because I’ll always want more with you. Why do you think I only hook up? I never settle with anyone. I haven’t since before I met you. I knew what I wanted as soon as we were friends.”
“You said you were okay just keeping things normal.” I told him. My nose is burning and my eyes are starting to fill up. I’m not going to cry. I’m not going to cry.
“I know what I said, but I can’t change how I feel.”
“Neither can I… and I care about Matt. I really do. I think we could turn into something good if I give it a chance. If we even have a chance. Eric is a wild card. I don’t know what he’ll do if he catches us together after he forbade me from dating him.”
“You can’t let him dictate every minute of your life.”
“Yeah, you don’t think I know that? I’m doing what I can.”
“You’re choosing Matt, not me.” Jace turned away and wouldn’t look at me.
“That’s not what I’m saying. This is my fault for leaning on you so much. Look, I can handle this appointment on my own. I’ll be okay staying at my place. I don’t need to stay at yours. I can take my pills. I’m a big girl. And I can find a ride to and from school.” I told him. He whipped his head around.
“Why are you so fucking difficult?” He growled.
“Why are you acting like a child?”
“You’re so frustrating!”
“Right back atcha.” I told him. Dr. Sullivan came out of his office and looked at me, then Jace. He didn’t say anything.
“Whenever you’re ready, I’ll be here.” He told me with a small smile. I nodded.
“I’ll just be a minute.” I told him. He nodded.
“Very well. Take your time.”
“Thank you.” I told him. He went back into his office and closed the door. “Look, I don’t have time to do this right now. You need to make a decision. I’m not waiting around for it. If you want to be a part of my life, I need a friend. If you can’t do that, let me know.” I told him.
“I’m not just going to turn my back on you.” He told me. I shook my head.
“Which is it?” I pressed.
“If friendship is all that’s on the table, I’ll have to take it.” He told me.
“Okay. Then you need to be okay with me seeing Matt.”
“I’ll work on it.” He told me.
“Okay.”
“But, I’m not giving up on you.” He told me. He offered me his hand. I ignored it and pushed myself up without help.
-.-
The appointment wasn’t very long. Dr. Sullivan didn’t have much to say. He told me not to push my limits. I told him that I went back to school today. He just told me to take it easy. I got a doctor’s note excusing me if I felt rundown.
He gave me another prescription for the pain. This one shouldn’t make me as drowsy as the others, so I don’t fall asleep in class.
“Angela, what a surprise.” Denise beamed at me. I smiled back.
“It’s nice to see you.” I gave her a one-armed hug. “I thought you were working nights.”
“Normally, but we’ve been short-handed this week. Everyone took off for vacation at the same time.” She explained. “Are you okay? Matt said you got hurt.” She eyed my arm and my face. I nodded.
“I fell down some stairs at Jace’s.” I told her. “I shouldn’t be allowed to do anything gravity-defying.” I joked. She laughed.
“Are you excited for tomorrow?” She asked me.
“I’m really excited.” I beamed.
“So is Matt, but don’t tell him I told you. I don’t want to seem uncool.”
“Your secret’s safe with me.”
-.-
“Are you going to give the silent treatment all night?” Jace asked him the car. I shrugged.
“I don’t know what to say to you.” I told him. “I think I’m going to do some things on my own from now on.” I told him.
“Like what?” He asked.
“Trying to shower, sleeping, getting dressed…”
“You’re overreacting.” He told me.
“I don’t think I am. Gwen offered to help me if I needed it. If I need help, I’ll just ask her. I don’t want to put you back in that situation.” I told him. His jaw clenched. “What happens when I say something you don’t like or push you away when you want more and you have me at a disadvantage?”
“I’m not your stepfather.” His words sliced right through me.
“You’re being possessive.” I shot back. He shut up. “I didn’t say you were, but I’m not comfortable with that anymore.”
“Fine.”
I all but dragged myself into the doctor’s office. I’m. So. Fucking. Tired. I feel old as hell. I lost all momentum after we made it upstairs. I plopped down into a waiting chair.
“I’m so tired.” I told Jace. He just laughed at me. “It’s not funny. I need a nap.” I told him, but that just made him laugh even harder. His body doubled over with laughter. I shook my head. “Dick.”
“Last time I checked.” He shot back. I made a face at him. “Don’t hate.”
“You started it.”
“So, how serious are things between you and Matt?” He asked, suddenly becoming serious. I didn’t say anything for a minute. He caught me by surprise.
“Where did that come from?” I countered.
“You didn’t answer my question.”
“Why do you want to know?”
“If you’re not serious or planning on being serious than he’s just a waste of time.” Jace told me. I bit my lip. “If he isn’t serious about you, then he’s not good for you. You can find someone who is.”
“Someone like you?” I asked.
“Would that really be so bad? You know I love you, Gel.”
“Don’t go there, please.”
“Why are you so scared?” He asked me.
“Because I don’t want anything to happen to you or to us. I don’t want our friendship to change. It’s the only constant thing I’ve had in my life. I don’t know what I’d do without it. I can’t afford to go there. I don’t want to be alone.” I told him.
“You’ll never be alone.”
“And what happens when things don’t work out between us? You’re going to be okay just being friends?”
“I-I don’t know.”
“You can’t promise me something impossible. Why can’t you just accept that this is what I want? I need to keep things the way they are between us, Jay.” I told him.
“Because I’ll always want more with you. Why do you think I only hook up? I never settle with anyone. I haven’t since before I met you. I knew what I wanted as soon as we were friends.”
“You said you were okay just keeping things normal.” I told him. My nose is burning and my eyes are starting to fill up. I’m not going to cry. I’m not going to cry.
“I know what I said, but I can’t change how I feel.”
“Neither can I… and I care about Matt. I really do. I think we could turn into something good if I give it a chance. If we even have a chance. Eric is a wild card. I don’t know what he’ll do if he catches us together after he forbade me from dating him.”
“You can’t let him dictate every minute of your life.”
“Yeah, you don’t think I know that? I’m doing what I can.”
“You’re choosing Matt, not me.” Jace turned away and wouldn’t look at me.
“That’s not what I’m saying. This is my fault for leaning on you so much. Look, I can handle this appointment on my own. I’ll be okay staying at my place. I don’t need to stay at yours. I can take my pills. I’m a big girl. And I can find a ride to and from school.” I told him. He whipped his head around.
“Why are you so fucking difficult?” He growled.
“Why are you acting like a child?”
“You’re so frustrating!”
“Right back atcha.” I told him. Dr. Sullivan came out of his office and looked at me, then Jace. He didn’t say anything.
“Whenever you’re ready, I’ll be here.” He told me with a small smile. I nodded.
“I’ll just be a minute.” I told him. He nodded.
“Very well. Take your time.”
“Thank you.” I told him. He went back into his office and closed the door. “Look, I don’t have time to do this right now. You need to make a decision. I’m not waiting around for it. If you want to be a part of my life, I need a friend. If you can’t do that, let me know.” I told him.
“I’m not just going to turn my back on you.” He told me. I shook my head.
“Which is it?” I pressed.
“If friendship is all that’s on the table, I’ll have to take it.” He told me.
“Okay. Then you need to be okay with me seeing Matt.”
“I’ll work on it.” He told me.
“Okay.”
“But, I’m not giving up on you.” He told me. He offered me his hand. I ignored it and pushed myself up without help.
-.-
The appointment wasn’t very long. Dr. Sullivan didn’t have much to say. He told me not to push my limits. I told him that I went back to school today. He just told me to take it easy. I got a doctor’s note excusing me if I felt rundown.
He gave me another prescription for the pain. This one shouldn’t make me as drowsy as the others, so I don’t fall asleep in class.
“Angela, what a surprise.” Denise beamed at me. I smiled back.
“It’s nice to see you.” I gave her a one-armed hug. “I thought you were working nights.”
“Normally, but we’ve been short-handed this week. Everyone took off for vacation at the same time.” She explained. “Are you okay? Matt said you got hurt.” She eyed my arm and my face. I nodded.
“I fell down some stairs at Jace’s.” I told her. “I shouldn’t be allowed to do anything gravity-defying.” I joked. She laughed.
“Are you excited for tomorrow?” She asked me.
“I’m really excited.” I beamed.
“So is Matt, but don’t tell him I told you. I don’t want to seem uncool.”
“Your secret’s safe with me.”
-.-
“Are you going to give the silent treatment all night?” Jace asked him the car. I shrugged.
“I don’t know what to say to you.” I told him. “I think I’m going to do some things on my own from now on.” I told him.
“Like what?” He asked.
“Trying to shower, sleeping, getting dressed…”
“You’re overreacting.” He told me.
“I don’t think I am. Gwen offered to help me if I needed it. If I need help, I’ll just ask her. I don’t want to put you back in that situation.” I told him. His jaw clenched. “What happens when I say something you don’t like or push you away when you want more and you have me at a disadvantage?”
“I’m not your stepfather.” His words sliced right through me.
“You’re being possessive.” I shot back. He shut up. “I didn’t say you were, but I’m not comfortable with that anymore.”
“Fine.”
This is an amazing story. Some chapters were hard to read but I was hooked. Thank you for sharing it.
2/16/18