After All That We've Been Through

Brian's POV

"Gates what the hell are you doing now?!"

I was lying on my back in the middle of the tour bus, willing the damn thing to stop spinning around in circles. My hands were straight up in the air and I was trying to grab hold of anything I could to stop the movement. This was all some sick and twisted tit-a-whirl ride and I wanted to get off! I fucking hate these kind of rides, specially when all I can see in my drunken blurred visions are those haunting blue eyes.

"Make it stop," I moaned, my arms falling over my eyes. Why is she still fucking in my head? I think I drank that whole bottle of Delmore by myself? I reached out for the bottle, only to see that it wasn't were I thought I put it last. Who moved my booze? This shouldn't be happening! I should be blacked out without a single recollection of the stupid shit I've done!

"Make what stop?" The deep voice chuckled. I squinted up to see blue eyes and dimples staring back at me. Fuck, she's everywhere! "You're lying on the fucking floor swimming? Get up, we've got that press conference in a half an hour!"

I suddenly feel my body being picked off the floor and set on my feet. My head feels like it weighs eight millions pounds and the bus is spinning even more than it was a few minutes ago. Oh, shit...I'm gonna be sick. I cover my mouth and fly towards the bathroom, pushing Zacky out of the was. Thankfully I make it just in time.

"Finally you puked," Zacky chuckled, fixing his hair in the mirror. "I'm honestly surprised your not dead after drinking the bottle of Jack and Delmore."

"Fuck you." I spit into the towel and flush down what was left of my dignity. I crumpled into a ball on the small floor, my head laying on Zacky's foot. "What the hell am I doing?"

"Well you just puked your brains out, so I would say starting to sober up." I looked up just in time to see the blurred look of judgement from those green eyes. I pulled my hands over my ears not wanting to hear his lecture. "But Gated man, you've got to pull your act together. We've got to go to this press conference and straighten shit out with the Fatals."

I groaned and slowly started to sit up, only to realize it wasn't the best idea. "I can't..." I said and then wretched again into the toilet.

"You've got to and someone's got to explain to Jimmy that you and Ms. Parker aren't an item. He's been running around like an asshole with excitement about it...he's been singing that damn kissing song all morning," Zacky huffed, handing me a paper towel after I picked my head out of the toilet again.

"I-I can't see her..." I moaned, now sitting back against the wall with my head in my hands. Knew that with one look at those beautiful blue eyes in this state that I wouldn't be able to keep myself in control. Letting Kady go was the hardest thing I've ever done, even more so then dumping Michelle after finding out that she had been cheating. I was heartbroken, and that was saying something because I had never been heartbroken. Ever.

Zacky kneeled down in front of me and looked me straight in the eye. "Why?" He better wipe that fucking smirk off his lips or I was going to punch him in the face. He doesn't know better than me! "If there is nothing there, why can't you man up?"

Because there was something there, even if I refused to admit it to myself! I fucking loved the girl and she deserved better than to be brought down by some asshole like me! I was a coward and ran right when she needed me the most. But what can I say? I'm a dick and if there had been another woman in our little camp tonight, I know I would have hooked up with her to distract myself. Not to mention the fucking vultures that we know as the press would have sucked the life out of that kind hearted, foul mouthed, bitch known as Violet Rouge.

I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose. "There is nothing between us," I snapped with a clenched jaw. "We were just fucking around. She doesn't mean shit to me." That was a bold faced lie and we both knew it. Zacky lowered his head and shook it.

"Alright, then this shouldn't be a problem," he sighed with a look of disappointment.

"Brian and Kady sitting in a tree k-i-s-s--"

"Shut the fuck up Jimmy, were not dating!" I raged, standing up a little two quickly. I had to catch myself on the vanity stand so I didn't topple over, but not before seeing my best friends face fall. "It's all a big misunderstanding."

"Well it doesn't look like it in this picture!" Jimmy argued, holding his phone so close to my face that it touched my nose. I quickly pulled the phone away from him and tried to focus my blurred vision on the screen.

There we were, post kiss outside of the jail. Our lips were inches apart and she was smiling at me. I felt my heart instantly plummet into my stomach as I focused on her eyes. She looked so happy....no, this was for the best. I would just end up hurting her and getting eaten alive by the press, and that was the best case scenario. Both of our lives would have ruined by this and I saved us both from a big heart ache.

"Well the fans seem to love Brady." Jimmy laughed, taking his phone away from me.

"Who the fuck is Brady?" I picked up my toothbrush, trying to scrub all my problems away. When in reality, I was just giving myself sore gums. I held onto the vanity stand, my whole body still spinning as I stood looking at a person I didn't recognize in the mirror. This monster had big dark circles under his eyes and seemed to be breathing out alcohol vapors even while brushing his teeth. This must be the real fucking Synyster Gates that the press sees when I go out drinking...

Jimmy laughed as Zacky pushed past us out of the bathroom. My head throbbed from the sound. "It's Brian and Kady put together...you know Brady. I came up with it myself! But any-who the fans are calling you Grouge....not as catch as Brady but whatever," he laughed.

The fans liked us together? Well that's fucking perfect because that means the press is going to be stalking us for weeks, trying to find any picture of us together. Even when we tell them there is nothing, they are going to try and make something. Fuck...and I'm an asshole for nothing...again. I guess that's just my nature.

"Yo Gates, are you ready?" Matt called as I pulled my black bean from the door over my head. "Larry is here with the car." Ugh, I don't think I could stomach a car ride.

"Yeah." I sighed and headed off the bus, but not before grabbing Johnny's flask off the counter. I took as sip and instant had to bit my knuckles. It was fucking tequila.

The car ride to the press conference in the Ramada Hotel ball room was quiet. Well at least to me because I had my ear buds in the entire time. I didn't want to answer my band mates questions or listen to their lectures. It was just me, The Eagles, and this flask of tequila.

All too soon we were walking into the press conference that was filled with lots of reporters in their fancy suits. And when I mean walk, I mean more like stumble because I was so far gone after finishing the flask that everything was fuzzy. I couldn't feel a damn thing, that is until I got seated and saw the mop of red curls enter the room. I quickly averted my gaze, but not before noticing that she was dressed in a short, black lace dress and was glued to Fitz's arm. I instantly clenched my fist under the table and tried to control the jealous fit I was about to have.

I put my head in my hands and took a sip of the water on the table as the urge to vomit fell over me again. Serves me right for taking the shit in the gnomes flask. It was then that I glanced out of the corner of my eye to see that black fabric right next to me. Ugh...now I really felt like I was going to be sick. Part of me wanted to pick her up and run from the room while the other wanted to bolt and save myself from my actions I couldn't control. Why did she look so damn hot?

"First of all, before we take any questions," Ryn said, standing behind Marley and Kady . "We would just like to clarify the rumored that have been going around." As they continued, I adjusted my aviators to prevent the flashes from blinding me. Though blindness would feel better than my blurry spinning vision that I was currently experiencing.

"Firstly," Marley cut in, leaning into his microphone. "I would like to publicly apologize for my and Axel's behavior last night. We were celebrating completing a new song that we will be releasing as a free live recording as an apology to our fans. In the Rock'n'Roll lifestyle, as many of you know, we like to party, drink, and occasionally dab in drugs. Well last night our party got a little out of hand when we were filming parts to the video that goes along with the live recording."

"And as for Violet being arrested as the news states, that was misgiven information," Caleb continued. "She was not arrested and had nothing to do with the arrest or the filming last night."

"But what about the rumored relationship with Mr. Gates?" Asked a tall dark haired woman with a tape recorder. Really? With all the advancements we have today, you're still using a tape recorder? My head continued to spin as I placed my chin in the palm of my hand, not really to hear the answer that was going to be given. My heart started to race and I couldn't breath as I heard that pretty little mouth open.

"That was also misgiven information," Kady said, her voice quivering slightly. I carefully peaked at her out of the corner of my eyes and instantly wished I hadn't. Those blur orbs were full of hurt and pain and she looked like she could break down any second. Jesus, I was a fucking asshole.

"I arrived at Knox County Jail to bail out Axel but didn't have the necessary funds in me. Mr. Gates helped us pay for bail and the picture that was taken was of a friendly thank you hug..." Kady let out a sigh and I thought I was going to be sick. I willed the burning bile to stay down. "There is no relationship between myself and Mr. Gates. We are strictly friends."

"The next question is for Mr. Gates." I nodded my head and swallowed multiple times, but the burn just kept rising. "Why did you decide to pay the bond for a rival band?"

That's a good question isn't it, but I couldn't answer because right at that moment I dived for the trash can behind the podium and spilled my guts. As I fell, I heard a collective gasp. Hopefully no one saw or heard me puke in the madness.

"Gates? Gates are you okay?"

"Fuck dude, what are you doing?"

"Gates that was fucking epic!"

"Don't encourage him, Jimmy!"

As I pulled my head out of the trash can I could see the blurred faces of both my band, our manger Larry, and all of Fatal Facade looking down at me. But my eyes could only focus on one face...the most beautiful set of blue eyes stared back at me. A small smile came over my face before the darkness took me away.

Notes

Well Mr. Gates has surely out done himself now! Now is press is going to think he's an alcoholic or can they spin it around into something else? But hey, at least he puked in the trash can! ;)