The Aviators

“No. No. No.”

I can hear Matt’s voice and the tone is hard and angry. Obviously the guy from the Guild is pissing him off. He’s only been here ten minutes by my reckoning and it’s been going downhill since then. I can’t really hear what the other guy is saying; he isn’t a quiet man, but he’s not as loud as Matt when he’s in a temper – and I have the door closed. So, considering I can’t hear the Guild guy, I have no idea what Matt is saying ‘no’ to.

There’s a moment of quiet, where I can only catch a low rumble of voices then Matt’s rises again, tighter than before. His words send chills down my spine.

“What the fuck? No. I can’t do that!” More soft mumbling, then, “No. No. Damn it. No. She...it hasn’t been like that with her.” Pause. “So what? Just because she hasn’t... No. No...”

I really wish I could hear what the other guy is saying; it would help clear things up for me. Then again, either way I guess I’d still be anxious. Anything to do with the Guild scares me. The fact that they have the power to take me away from Matt if they think it’s necessary...terrifies me. I mean, I don’t think they’d remove me just because Matt is being lax with me, but...well they could.

Stiffening, I sense that it’s become extremely quiet and then I hear Matt again, his voice is much closer and then I realise I hear footsteps coming down the hallway, ahead of my master’s voice.

“Look. You don’t understand how it is with us. She’s always obedient. I don’t think any of this is necessary.”

The bedroom door flies open. I shrink back against the headboard of the bed as the guy, who came before, strides into the room. Matt is right on his heels, expression dark. But for the first time in awhile I don’t take any notice; my eyes are wide upon the Guild guy, and I can feel my body beginning to tremble. He glares down at me as he approaches the bed.

“Stand up,” he demands. I don’t hesitate. He’s from the Guild, hesitation could get me punished.

Scrambling off the bed, I stand beside it, eyes lowered to the floor. I’ve never forgotten the training I was given. Just because Matt’s easy on me doesn’t mean I can’t act this way for preservations sake. Still, I can feel the tension in the air. I don’t dare look toward Matt, because I know he’s furious. Judging by the coolness of the Guild guy’s tone when he next speaks, he knows this too.

“We have to do this, Matthew. It’s normal procedure.”

With my head down, I can only hear Matt’s response.

“Doesn’t mean I have to agree with it, Robert.”

I blink, still with my eyes fixed to the floor. So, that’s his name...Robert. Not that knowing his name makes me warm to him or anything. Definitely doesn’t make me any less frightened of the situation. The atmosphere is heavy between us now. The Guild guy, Robert clears his throat.

“Whether you agree, or not, is unimportant. This has to be done.” Then he says to me, “Turn around and lean over the bed.”

I shiver, this time darting a look toward Matt; his features are drawn in a cold mask, revealing nothing. He is keeping a tight rein on his emotions. He meets my eyes, though, and nods his head, an indication that I should obey.

Trembling, apprehension building inside my mind, I turn and brace my forearms against the bedspread. In this position, I am uncomfortably aware that my ass is sticking out behind me. I have never felt so vulnerable before. Except for when I had first slept with Matt.

There’s a moment of stillness and then Robert walks over to the bed. I see from the corner of my eye his left knee propping against the bed beside me. Biting my bottom lip, I wait fearfully for what’s about to happen. He pauses for a moment, then grips the back of my neck and shoves me forward against the bed, pinning me in a single rough motion. I gasp out in protest, grabbing at the bedspread, and twisting involuntarily beneath his hand.

He subdues me easily, digging his thumb into a pressure point.

“Master...” I whine out, turning my gaze toward Matt, pleading with my eyes. Robert tightens his grip before looking toward him as well, one eyebrow raised.

“Well, Matthew? You need to do this. Make sure she understands fully who is Master here.”

I see Matt scowling, but he doesn’t answer just looks at the two of us. Robert’s fingers are digging into my neck, and it hurts; I whimper softly, but hold still, hoping he’ll let go soon. But, more pressing right now is the fact that I have no idea what the hell he means. How exactly is Matt supposed to show me that he is Master? I mean, I know that already. And I understand that. Nothing could make me forget that I’m the slave...and he’s the master.

Robert presses me down more, sliding his other hand to my pants. I stiffen up, but remain still, shivering more. Matt growls low an almost possessive note to it. I guess he is willing to tolerate the other guy holding me down. But, I am his property, so for Robert to go any further than that...

He stalks forward, glowering at Robert.

“Fine. Let her go. And I will.”

I breathe hard, waiting, wondering; and then Robert releases me, backing away. I make to get up, but don’t get far, because next I know, Matt is pinning me to the bed, a knee firm against the small of my back. That shocks me; I twist my head a little and peer up at him quizzically. Matt’s eyes narrow as mine meet his. My curiosity turns to fear when I see the look on his face. His features are set in stern lines.

“Master...?” I hate the fact that my voice shakes, but I’m afraid, and a voice in my head is telling me that right now, Matt is not going to ease my fear. No, he’s going to make it worse.

This horrible feeling churns in my stomach, and my eyes begin to get wet. My breath hitches in my throat, which is tightening up. The room seems to be closing in on me. I can’t concentrate on anything but how close Matt is to me, everything else, including Robert seems to fade from existence.

I didn’t think this would ever happen with Matt. Even though I know he said he’d punish me if I ever disobeyed him. But this isn’t the case now. I haven’t broken any of his rules, or made him angry. No, this is all due to Robert, and the whole Guild thing. But, that’s not even the real issue. The thing is, I never thought I’d feel like this even if Matt was seriously punishing me. This feeling of absolute terror. It’s caught me off guard, and I don’t know how to deal with it.

Matt leans forward, over me, and places his hand where Robert’s was moments ago. I tremble, breathing faster, heart racing. Wondering what he’s going to do to me. Whatever it is, it’s obviously something they were talking about out in the kitchen. And perhaps it was what Matt was reacting so negatively to, before.

His thumb begins to rub slow circles over the pressure point at the side of my neck; a soft sob escapes that I can’t prevent. Matt inhales sharply, but then he moves his other hand to my pants and tugs them down. I whimper again; he keeps rubbing gently.

“Master, what’re you doing?”

Matt growls, “Don’t talk.”

He moves his hand over my bottom. I tense up, biting my lip hard. Tears threaten to spill over onto my cheeks. I don’t want this to happen. Whatever this is...I just want this to be over...for that Robert guy to be gone. I want...I want Matt to hold me and tell me he...he loves me...I want him to hold me and make every bad thing go away...

The tears fall and I let out a choking cry. “Master...please...”

Matt doesn’t reprimand me this time. Instead I hear a sound that sends a tingle down my spine. The jingle of his belt buckle, then the noise of his fly being undone. A shudder runs through my body as it dawns on me what he’s going to do to me. Tensing, I squeeze my eyes shut, tears beading thickly between my eyelids, a couple escaping, and trickling down my face.

Matt moves his knee from my back, between my legs, forcing them apart. I clench my jaw to stop my objection, it will do no good. He is going to do this, because he has to, and because Robert is standing there watching us. But, I wish I could tell what he was thinking, knowing that might make this easier to take...

He grasps my hip with one hand, lifting me a little; his other hand must be guiding himself into place. I whine out as I feel the head of his cock nudging up between my legs. No...not like this...I don’t...I don’t...no...

I hear Matt exhale in a rush. Then he pulls me back onto his cock, hard. He sinks into me in a single thrust. And it hurts. He’s big...and the last time we slept together he eased into me. This is only the second time ever... and for him to just shove into me like that...

I start to cry, sobs wracking my body. He ignores me, as he shifts his grip on my hips, holding me tight as he proceeds to fuck me into the bed.

Hoping that he might listen, I begin to beg him, even though Robert is there. “Stop. Please. Master, stop...” He doesn’t. He just keeps moving, harder too.

My heart feels like it’s breaking, at the same time as I’m attempting to block it all out. I can’t handle this, I want this to end. I clutch at the blanket, burying my face into it, soaking it with my tears. Eventually, as he keeps pounding into me, I shut down completely, distancing myself from my predicament... blanking out...

* * * * *

Sobbing softly, I huddle into myself, back pressed against the wall of the shower. Hot water shrouds me from the outside as I try to wash everything away. Matt is in the bathroom as well, pacing; Robert is long gone. I try to ignore him, wiping at my eyes.

“Val.” He’s looking at me now, though the curtain of water. I blink at him, but say nothing.

He clears his throat, hard. “Val, I’m sorry...”

I shake my head, averting my eyes. But I do respond. “You...you hurt me, Master...” I swallow hard and go on, voice cracking. “I...I was...I was so scared...but...you...you wouldn’t stop...”

Matt groans, and whispers, “I never meant to harm you...”

Peering out at him I can read the remorse in his eyes. But that doesn’t ease the ache in my heart. I feel that he’s betrayed my trust. He said he wouldn’t let anything happen to me...and look what’s happened. I still got hurt. It’s no wonder I don’t usually trust any man I come in contact with.

He grimaces and looks down at the floor, sinking to a crouch, raking tense fingers through his hair. I bite my lip, watching him.

He breathes out hard, speaking to the tiles in earnest. “He said if I did this the Guild would look favourably upon it and not interfere as much.” He glances at me again, jaw clenching. “I didn’t know whether to believe him on that, but I wasn’t willing to test him.”

I give him a long look, still hearing his initial protest, wanting to know what that was about; not knowing if I dare to ask. Matt tilts his head at me. I shiver, rubbing at my arms and dropping my head down against my knees. I hear him get up, and go over to the bathtub; peeking over I watch as he leans his ass against the edge of it.

He doesn’t speak, giving me a little breathing space. I am grateful for that. Trying to formulate the question I want is taking all my concentration. Breathing in and out, I count to ten. Then I peer up at him.

“Master?”

Matt nods to me that he’s listening.

I chew on the side of my cheek. “What...what were you saying ‘no’ to?”

His eyes meet mine, and the look in them shocks me. There is such a depth of sorrow and guilt in them that I can’t fathom it.

“Master...?”

Matt grips the edge of the tub, hard; his knuckles are white and the muscles in his forearms are tight. He leans forward slightly, pegging me with a hard look.

“What do you think, Valary?” He grits out, “Did you think I wanted to do that to you? Fuck, Val...I’d kill to take back what I just did to you. You think I didn’t notice how frightened you were...? Fuck. Val... I wish I could take it all back...I wish...” He pauses, chin resting against his chest. He takes several long breaths, nostrils flaring as he exhales. “Saying that won’t change what’s happened, though. Will it? I could wish as much as I like, but we’re stuck in this position. I made a decision and went with it, and you suffered because of it.”

Matt clenches a fist and presses it to his chest, just where his heart is. I blink at him; he stares back at me. “It hurts me here. Y’know that? It practically tore my heart apart to hear you cry like that.”

I continue to look at him. He groans, lowering his hand back to the edge of the tub, squeezing his fingers around it. He bends his head down, eyes glaring down at the tiles. I tilt my head then slowly stand, shutting off the water. Walking forward, pushing the door open, I step out of the shower onto the mat. Ignoring the fact that I’m dripping with water, I slowly approach him. He doesn’t look up until I’m standing directly in front of him. Even then, it takes several long minutes before he lifts his head, his gaze meeting mine.

“Master?”

Matt’s eyes flicker over my face. I wait not trusting my voice. He presses his mouth together in a thin line but then lets it relax a little.

“Val...” His voice is low, almost hesitant. Closing his eyes for a moment, he appears to be gathering his thoughts. I continue to wait. His eyelids lift after a few moments; his eyes are clear and bright. He shifts, reaching out to rest his hands on my hips; the contact is light the tips of his fingers brushing against my skin.

“Val.” Matt repeats my name, so much meaning in that one word. He draws in a deep breath before he says more. “Val, I...shit...this shouldn’t be so hard to say...” He tilts his head back, blinking hard.

“Master, what is it?” I try to look him in the eyes.

He scrunches up his face, myriad expressions flickering across his features; then he must decide something because he gives me a look. “Could I ask a favour?”

I nod.

“Call me Matt.”

That surprises me. “What?”

“Matt. Call me Matt...”

“But, Master...I shouldn’t...” I start to say; he cuts me off with a sharp shake of his head.

“Just for now...we can go back to the whole Master thing later...but, right now I need to hear you call me Matt...okay?” He lifts a hand and gently strokes a finger across my cheek.

I quiver, still trying to get my head around the request. The fact that he’s asking me is such a shock. I mean, it was different when we had sex for the first time, because I said it first...and then he demanded I say his name. This, this was a much different situation.

Still, he was asking it of me, and I was not going to deny him, especially if it helps him say what he needs to say.

“Okay...Matt...” My voice croaks on his name. The corners of his lips twitch faintly and he slides his hand back to my hip, closing both hands on my sides. I tremble as he pulls me a little closer to him.

He murmurs, “I’m sorry...” He leans his forehead against mine, searching my eyes. I blink, carefully; he’s so close we could almost get our eyelashes tangled. He closes his eyes for a moment, then opens them again looking straight into mine. There are so many emotions swirling in his deep gaze that I can’t recognise any of them. But when he starts to speak, I forget that and see only one emotion burning in their depths.

“Val...Val...damn, there is so much I should say.” His brow creases before smoothing out. “But, none of it matters right now, ‘cept this...” He looks me in the eye. “I love you.”

All the colour rushes away from my face, well at least it feels that way; I feel light-headed as if I might faint. I grab hold of Matt’s shoulders, afraid that if I don’t I’ll slide to the floor. He senses this and wraps both arms around my waist. Leaning into him, I start shaking, unable to respond to his statement. He nuzzles into my hair and murmurs.

“I know it might be hard to believe. Especially after what’s just happened...but...it’s true.” He begins stroking my wet hair. Obviously, I’m getting his clothes soaked, but he doesn’t seem to care about that. He keeps talking as he holds me close. “It might be hard for you to accept, right now...but...I just needed to tell you...I love you...”

His voice thickens and he buries his face in my hair. “I am so fucking sorry for what happened today...”

My throat chokes up at his admission. I press closer into his solid body, wanting to feel him as close as possible. His arms tighten around my trembling body. I begin to cry again, but this time there’s a different quality to my tears. I’m not afraid anymore, I’m just utterly exhausted. Matt notices this and, without a word, eases us both away from the edge of the bathtub.

Holding me in one arm, he grabs a towel. He turns me gently, drying me carefully. Then he wraps it around me, and lifts me in his arms, carrying me out to the bedroom. Placing me on the bed, he climbs up next to me, lying on his side. I blink at him. He smiles brushing the backs of his fingers against my cheek.

“Sleep, Val...I’ll stay here.” He sucks at his bottom lip, nodding a little as if to an unanswered question. “We’ll talk once you’ve rested.”

I don’t think I can, though. But he keeps stroking his fingers over my cheek and the repetitive motion begins to lull me. My eyes slide shut even as I fight to keep watching him. The last thing I hear as I slip off is Matt murmuring, ‘I love you’, one more time...

Notes

So....I'll let you debrief after that one. Enjoy?