Help Me Fly

The restless sleep I had been in was taken away from me, I felt like I was falling. Like the dreams you have of falling but when you wake up you are actually safe in bed.
Me? No I actually fell off of my bed onto the hard wood floor. Talk about hurt.

I took in my surroundings, my...our room was dark. The flat screen tv mounted on the wall directly across form the bed was turned off. We always slept with it on satelite radio. We hated to sleep in silence. The whole house was silent. It sent goosebumps through out my whole body. I know last I was on my back porch staring at the stars, thinking of my lost love. I had someone with me, one of the guys, but I was not sure who. I do know they brought me to bed as I was drifting off to sleep.

Standing up, I untangled my legs from my comfortor and softly walked to the hallway. It had to be the middle of the night, or early morning. I could hear the faint snores of the occupiants in the living room.

My couch was a ‘U’ shape and fit the length of three walls. The fourth wall was were my entertainment center stood. One end of the couch was a lounge with an oversize ottomen that rested in front of the huge bay window. That is where Zacky was sleeping. Half on the lounge, the other half on the bottom frame of the window. His head however, was right next to Johnny’s unsocked foot. The sock was on the floor. He was spread out on the longest part of the couch, his head was inches from the top of Jimmy’s head. His right foot was somehow stright up in the air. Like he had a metal rod in it. His left foot was laying across the anckles of my dear older brother. They had a soft harmonizing of snores going together. It was adorable how these guys had become close in ways they didn’t even know.

But they were one member short. Hum… where was he being nosey at?

Slightly turning my head I peeked in the kitchen, empty. He’s probally in the bathroom. I could tell that the space on the floor in front of the couch had a blow up matress, a few pillows and a blanket that looked like it had been thrown back.

I decided to grab a drink, my throat felt dry. I knew what I wanted to do since I was now fully awake.

As quietly as I could I grabbed my orange juice and my pack of double stuffed oreos and softly stepped to my art room. A small light was already on. So I had found the missing link.
Sitting at my art table, he was looking at one of my many books I drew in from time to time. I could never contain myself to draw on paper.

Snapping his head up at the soft creek of the door, I saw his face had a scared look. Like he had been caught with a teenage girl in his parents bed in middle school. No that did not happen, would have sucked for him if it did though.

“Hey, we didn’t think you would wake up for a while.” He whispered, I don’t know why thoes boys could sleep through almost anything. Unless someone was cooking, and they all would be up like military school style.

I could not find the words to reply to him. I wanted to talk to him again. I could feel it in my heart that I owed him that much. So I just shrugged my shoulders and waved up my pack of cookies and large glass of orange juice.

“You still eat thoes two together, huh? I guess something never change.” I smiled at him, I knew what he meant. We both used to share this secret indulgent together. Walking over to the art table, I sat the cookies down on top of the attached drawers and grabbed the high back computer chair and joined him. The glass in between us, I nudged the cookies towards him.

“No, you enjoy them. I have to keep up my physique.” He just laughed softly. I nudged them again, I felt like a puppy pushing an empty bowl to its master for food.

“Okay, okay. But this is still our secret.” I smiled as he took the first cookie. Once his was to his perfered wetness, I did the same to mine. Although I held it in the juice longer.

“I didn’t know that you had grown so accustomed to drawing all of us.” He motioned to the book he was looking at.

It was true, they all had become my best work. I would draw them in different sceneros. I helped draw out the video cartoon for “A Little Piece of Heaven” that was fun to do.

Grabbing a notepad out of a drawer below my cookies, I took one of my many drawing pens I used, and began to write to him.

“You guys always gave me inspiration. Always have.”

“I am glad we can still be the cause that you continue to do this. Well I hope you will keep doing this. Your amazing at this talent.” He smiled softly.

“I will draw when the time is right. I need inspiration first.”

“I will not rush you. None of us will, but you know we can always be your inspiration.”

“Your such a suck up!” I smiled at him.

“Ya, but you love me.” I gave him a knowing look.

Standing up I walked over to my fabric chest, I am jack of all trades when it comes to arts and crafts, I reached in and grabbed a tshirt. I kept it in here for inspiration. It felt like it had been throught the washer more then a million times. The once jet black had fadded to a passable dingy black.

“No way. You still have this?” He held it up looking at the picture on the front. It was a vintage Avenged Sevenfold shirt, these shirts were printed back when the band only had an old church bus to tour in. Back when each person had only a $1 to them selves for food per day. When they would drive for hours on end to findout that a gig would be cancled.

“How could I not still have it?” I need to get more paper.

“Well of course, you would have to have it because all of us signed it. So I know it’s worth a fortune.” Smiling at his joke I snatched the old shirt away. It was worn to where it felt like tissue tshirt. The picture was one of the first drawings of the death bat, you could tell that the shirt and printing were done by amatures, me being one of them.

“Do you remember the mess we all made when we first tried to make some at home?”

“I remember Jimmy and you getting into a ink fight. And me and Zacky got pulled into it somehow.”

He was right. I had grabbed Shadows for protection from a fast stream of red ink, that landed on his face, white shirt and his jeans. He was not happy with Jimmy.

“See you can still smile and laugh.” He pulled me out of my little memory. Smiling softly to him, I nodded.

“I know you don’t wanna hear this, but I know you can and will be happy again. I also know that you will be an amazing mother. So please for me, and your babies, promise me you will be the mother I know you can be?” Holding onto my hands in his, his eyes turned soft and pleading. I smiled softly nodding my head.

‘I promise.’ I scribbled as fast as I could, and put my arms around his neck. I always knew he would help me. I felt the more I was around him, the better I seemed to be.

I don’t know how long it had been, but I felt something coming from my eyes. I was crying.
Why was I crying, I felt all my tears were gone. Was this happyness?

“I know you want to cry, so cry all you want.” I felt being lifted into his lap, tigthening my arms around his neck I did as he said.

I cried.

Notes

all errors are mine. sorry for it.