Not a bad thing

Zacky’s POV
All us guys were at Matt’s house. Lizzy, Lynn and Izzie were having a girls night and Brian got us all to join him in his misery, being without Lynn. At the start of the night Brian had been inseparable with his phone, but Matt made us all hand in the phones and he put them away, we could get them back when we went home again.

Now it was just us, a game of COD, pizza and beer. Even thought we saw plenty of each other when we were on tour, it was always nice to have a night like this in the comfort of our own homes. Matt had convinced me to tell everyone what was bothering me. He seemed to think that would work getting my head out of my ass as he told me. I was trying not to be a girl about it, but I didn’t feel like Matt was taking me very seriously.

Fact was, after I told him yesterday, I did feel a little better, but I still wasn’t convinced. I got pulled away from my thoughts by Brian “Z, what the hell is up with you, you are damn quiet and you are a shame to have in my team. You didn’t shoot a single person of the other team! And got shot yourself 4 times already! Get your head in the game or just quit!” I gave my controller to Johnny, who was only watching till that point “I will get us some beers”

When I got back into the room, they all quit the game and sat there, waiting for me. I handed them their beers. “So, are you finally going to tell us what’s bothering you? You have been off your game for the past few days.” Brian stated. “Nothing’s wrong” Brian shoved me a little “Bullshit”. I sat down, staring at them. These guys are my brothers, this wasn’t me being a girl, this was me talking to my best friends. “Well, I was just thinking about Liza, on why she broke up with me” Johnny looked at me “Have you’ve been drinking that much Z, Liza didn’t break up with you, you broke up with her” I shook my head “No, I didn’t, she did, because I cheated on her with one of those groupies” Johnny slapped my shoulder “Well done Z, I never liked her anyways”, “I did” I said quietly. “Then why did you cheat on her” Arin asked. “Because that is what I do”. Brian spoke up “We’ve all been there once or again. None of us can say they’ve been completely faithful with all of their girlfriends”.

“You don’t understand, I cheated on every single one of them, even in high school. All my relationships ended because I cheated. Not a single exception” I burst out. Everyone was quiet after my outburst from just now. “I don’t think I’m able to handle a relationship. Maybe I just can’t be a one woman man. Maybe that is what my mom taught me from her being around all those different men.” They all knew the stories about my mom and all her boyfriends in all the years I was still living at home. Arin looked at me “Maybe you just haven’t found the right woman?” I chuckled bitterly “That’s just sad isn’t it? In all my living years, with all those girls, there never was even one that could keep me from cheating? I should just face it, maybe it’s just who I am. I’m a fucking bad person”.

“If you decide to continue feeling miserable about this, maybe you should talk to Izzie.” Brian said, suddenly serious. “Why would I do that?” I looked at Brian, surpised. What had Izzie to do with this? Brian looked at me. “Izzie’s dad was a cheater, a big one, he had one girlfriend after another and it took Izzie’s mom 25 years to find out. After her dad left, Izzie thought being a cheater was genetically determined. She thought she could never have a relationship and be happy with it. She was convinced she would cheat, just like her dad did to her mom. She never cheated on anyone, she just couldn’t do it. Izzie goes for a relationship a 100%, every time, even after she got cheated on a lot. She told me the story about her almost husband this afternoon. She doesn’t believe she is a genetically determined cheater anymore, but she now believes she is destined to be cheated on. I will make it my mission to look after her, she will not be hurt again” I looked over to Matt, who was moving around his seat uncomfortable. Oops. I wondered what Matt was thinking right now. “Sorry, I digress. I think you should talk to Izzie, because she knows how you feel, maybe she can talk some sense into you.” Brian closed of his lecture and looked really satisfied with himself.

“Why do you feel so bad about it now anyways? What made you decide to talk to us about this now?” Brian asked. Shit. I didn’t want to tell him, he is going to freak. He’s always so protective of Lizzy. But as usual I couldn’t control my blushing and Brian knew me too well. “You like someone! You actually like someone! Who is she?!” I looked at my hands “I kissed Lizzy last week” I said, very softly. “YOU DID WHAT?!” Brian screamed and got up. He looked very angry. Uh Oh.

Lynn’s POV
Brian kept texting me while I was trying to get over to Izzie’s. This week has been amazing, It really was, but I got restless. I like Brian. It’s not me fangirling over Synyster Gates, it’s me falling hard for Brian Haner Jr., but I needed time alone. I was that kind of person. Brian didn’t get that, he wanted to be with me all the time. He called me at work 10 times a day, he wanted to have lunch with me, he wanted to pick me up after work and hang out with me the whole night, until I had to go to work the next morning. And then it would start all over again. He was driving me crazy. I know I needed to talk to him about it, but I felt so stupid. We were only together for a week, he probably would think I was already sick of him. Which was certainly not the case, not in the slightest. So when I received a message from Brian, that he had to put his phone away because Matt had said so, I was grateful towards Matt. This would just be a night for me and the girls.

When I arrived at Izzie’s house, the two of them had already started on the cocktails. “Hey, you finally got here!” Izzie came towards me and gave me a hug “I feel like I haven’t seen you in ages, I’m glad you’re here”. I walked over to Lizzy and gave her a hug too “Was Brian not able to let you go?” she asked me laughingly. I saw Izzie glaring at me already. She knew me well. “Matt made them put their phones away” I said. We all walked to the living room and made ourselves comfortable, cocktails in hand, friends around, this was already a good night. “So Iz, tell about your date with Matt, I want to know everything” Izzie started telling about her date, about the dinner, the beach, the groupies, the goodnight kiss. “I really wanted him to come in you know, but he left. He was right though, we are taking it slow and that most certainly wouldn’t have worked if he had set a foot in my house, damn he looked so sexy” I could see she was falling for him and to be honest, I have to give it to him, he made a great effort with the roses and the date he planned, but I still wasn’t convinced he wouldn’t hurt her. Maybe I should test him a little, see how far he will go if temptation is send to him. I hated myself for thinking this way, but I can’t get Izzie get hurt again. She had enough of that the past years.

I snapped out of my thoughts, Izzie was glaring over to me “Lynn, what’s wrong, I know that face”. I sighed. I couldn’t tell her about my plan, and I really didn’t want to tell her about the Brian thing, but she knew me too well and she would find out sooner or later. “Brian and I have been together every free moment of my time, he is calling me 10 times a day” I started. “He’s driving you crazy” Izzie said. I nodded “I need time for myself, be alone once in a while, it has nothing to do with him” Izzie put her arm around me “You don’t have to tell me sweetie, I know” Lizzy looked at me “You need to tell him Lynn, he will understand” I looked at my hands “What if he thinks I’m already sick of him?” “Are you?” Lizzy said. “No! Of course not! I like him, a lot!” “Well there’s your answer, just tell him, he’ll understand. He gets carried away, just remind him that you need your own time. That will give him the chance to do some of his things too. Hang out with me for example, this is the longest I haven’t seen him in years when he’s at home” She winked at me, there was no shred of recrimination in her face.

“I’m sorry for keeping him away from you, I never meant to” I said to Lizzy. “I know you didn’t. Brian is like that, you will see him do that more often in the future. With his music, with his drinking, with his gaming, with his everything, that’s just who he is. I know he will come back to me, he always does” She laughed. “I sound like a witch now huh? Like I have this spell over him” I laughed too. “I will talk to him tomorrow, let’s hope this will all work out” I thought about Brian, I needed a night away from him, to think about how I’m going to talk to him. If I would go over now I would just say stupid things, I’m already a little wasted. I needed a good excuses why I wouldn’t stay with him tonight without him pushing him away.

“Iz, is it okay if I stay over?” I asked her. “Sure, what about you Lizzy?” I grabbed my phone to text Brian that I was staying over at Izzie’s and that he could pick me up here tomorrow, while Lizzy poured us new cocktails “If we’re all staying here, we ‘d better get drunk!”

Notes

You asked for more insight on Zacky, well, now you've got it!
Tell me what you think! :)

<3