Fake Reflection

A pair of blue eyes gazed out of the window, not looking at anything in particular. The steady beeping of the heart monitor in the background is something he doesn't even notice anymore. The door to his room opened, and he lazily pulled his gaze from the window. Johnny walked in with a small smile on his face. "How's the pain level today?" he asked as he started to change out the IV bag. "Bout a five. It doesn't hurt nearly as much today." Kevin told him, still having a hard time believing that this man saved his life. "That's good. I'm going to reduce your morphine drip then." he said, receiving a nod.

Kevin watched him press a few buttons on a white box attached to the IV stand. It's surprised him just how good of a doctor Johnny was. If he didn't know better, he would have never guessed him to be gang related. "When do you think I can go home?" he asked as Johnny started to take his blood pressure. "Well I'd like to get your pain level down to at least a two," he told him as he took off the pressure cuff, and started to check his incision, "You just got out of ICU three days ago, but everything is healing nicely, so maybe we can get you out of here the day after tomorrow." he finished.

Kevin gave him a silent nod, and Johnny went about writing some things down in his chart. "Thank you," Johnny looked up from the chart with a cocked brow, "For saving my life." McNicholes said at a whisper before meeting his gaze. Johnny snapped the chart closed with a smirk. "Well I wouldn't have been able to if you hadn't helped us out. Wouldn't have had to if you hadn't followed him, but you did, so maybe I should be thanking you. You didn't have to help us." he told him. "Yes I did. It's my job. Just because you get under my skin doesn't mean I'm going to let you fall victim to a piece of shit like Boyd," he said as the beeps on his heart monitor started to pick up, "Sure as hell wasn't going to let him get away with manipulating me." he growled growing angry with everything that had happened. "It's over now," Johnny said patting his shoulder as he watched the monitor with caution, "No need to get worked up." he said as the beeps slowed.

A small knock sounded at the door, and they both looked up when Matt poked his head in. Kevin watched him walk in, a small amused half smile coming out. "You brought me flowers?" he asked with a cocked brow noticing the small vase of flowers he was holding. Matt let out a small chuckle, "Wait till The Rev gets here," he said placing the vase on a table, "I left him on the elevator." he added with his own amused smile.

Not long after there was three loud pounds on the door. "Shadz you ass open this door!" Jimmy's voice floated through the door. Matt chuckled a little as he walked over, and opened the door. "You could of helped me." he grumbled walking in with arms full of balloons, flowers, a giant stuffed bear. "I could have, but I didn't want anyone to see me with you." Matt replied with a grin. "I'd flip you off if I could." Jimmy told him before turning to McNicholes, a wide grin coming out upon seeing his wide eyes. "What's up McNut?" he asked as he started to unload his arms. "Was all this really necessary?" Kevin asked looking at everything.

Jimmy gave him an are you serious look as he tied the balloons to the back of a chair. "I had to make sure you knew how much I would have missed you if you died," he told him, plopping down on the edge of the bed, "I mean, who else is going to annoy the fuck out of us?" Kevin couldn't hold back the chuckle that escaped. "You annoy the fuck out of me too." he said, and Jimmy grinned wider. "Glad the feeling's mutual," he said as he made himself comfortable next to McNicholes, "Besides, if you died, I don't think I could continue to see your mom," he said as serious as possible as he slid an arm across his shoulders, "I always wanted a son, and without you it would be kind of pointless." he told him, fighting hard to hold back his smile.

Kevin rolled his eyes a little, but didn't hide the fact that he was kind of amused with man. "One, I'm older than you by like two years." he started, "Age is just a number." Jimmy interrupted him, "Two," he continued holding up two fingers in front of his face, "My parents have been married for almost 40 years, and still going strong. I doubt you're doing her." he finished. Jimmy mocked surprised, and jumped up from the bed, "That tramp. She said I was the only one." Kevin connected his gaze with Shadows amused expression, "How do you put up with this?" he asked. "I have a punching bag in the basement." Matt told him. "Ah," he replied with a nod, "You're going to have to let me know where you got it." he said looking at Jimmy with a slight smirk. "I'll give you their card before I leave." Matt chuckled. "You guys just love me too much to actually hit me." Jimmy told them matter of fact. "He might." Kevin said motioning to Shadows with his head.

A few chuckles emitted before the room fell into a slightly awkward silence. "What are you doing here anyway?" Kevin finally asked looking at Shadows. They were really the last people he expected to see, even with Christ being his doctor. Matt gave Johnny and Jimmy a look that told them it was time to go. They knew what Matt wanted to talk to him about, but he wanted to do it alone. The two left, and the room fell silent again. It was a little tense, but these two have never been civil with each other in the same room. "So what do you want?" Kevin finally asked connecting their gazes. "I wanna know how you got mixed up with him?"

Kevin let out a sigh, and looked at his hands in his lap. "He came to me," he started to explain, "Spewed this story about you being part of the cartel, and were a concern of national security." he said. "And you didn't find it odd that he came to you instead of the feds?" Matt asked. "I did, I even asked him. Said he didn't want to go there yet. Knew I was planning on running for Governor in next years election. He said he would back me, and thought bringing you down would help." Kevin told him. He let out a huff, and shook his head, "I was stupid." he muttered.

Matt looked at him with a little sympathy. "You weren't stupid," he said, and McNicholes met his eyes, "You were just trying to do your job, and better your career. Nothing stupid about that," he told him, "You were just lead under false allegations." Kevin nodded, feeling a little better about it. Matt moved his chair closer to the bed, "Have you been updated on everything that's happened?" he asked. "Yeah, Richard came by yesterday, and told me," Kevin said before a slight smirk came out, "Boyd did a number on you, you look like shit." he said. Matt let out a small chuckle, "Fucking lead pipe, that shit hurts." Kevin let out his own chuckle, "So does getting shot."

The room fell silent again, but it wasn't tense or awkward. "You know we can be very influential with the general public." Matt spoke up. Kevin narrowed his eyes in slight confusion, "What are you talking about?" he questioned. "When you respect the people, they respect you," Matt continued, "You seen all the protesters when we were locked up. They weren't there because they hate us." he said. "I hate you," Kevin said, and Matt gave him a look that showed no surprise, "And the fact that I feel guilty about that makes me hate you more." he added.

Matt couldn't hold back his laugh, and Kevin grinned, "I fucking hate you too, and I know exactly how you feel." He couldn't stand McNicholes, but sometimes you had to swallow your pride to do what was right for the people. "I'm just saying they listen to us, and if you need someone to back you, and help fund your campaign, we can help you out." Matt told him. Kevin sat silent for a moment as he let what he was just told sink in. "What's in it for you?" he asked. Matt smirked, "And you thought you were stupid," he said earning a slight grin, "Just leave us alone. We're not hurting anyone, if anything we're helping them."

Kevin chewed on his lip as he thought about the offer. He has seen the kind of support they get from the people. He's heard how they talk about them like heroes. It was one of the things that pissed him off about them, but now he's seen it himself. They didn't have to help him. They didn't have to save all of those girls. Shadows didn't have to step on the cartel, but he did, all for the people. Kevin met Shadows questioning eyes. "Deal." he whispered. Matt grinned, and stood from his chair, "Glad we could reach an agreement." he said, patting him on the shoulder a little.

Kevin looked up at him, "This doesn't change how I feel about you." he said, but Matt's grin never faded, "Agreed." he said before turning to leave. Kevin grabbed his wrist and stopped him. "Don't let her slip away," he said, and Matt snapped his head around, "I did and it was the biggest mistake of my life." he finished before letting him go. He looked away and stared at the wall, not believing he just said that. He didn't like the idea of her being with him, but he knew he deserved her more than he ever did.

Matt stared at him for a moment with shock before walking away without another word. He's tried hard not to think about her, but she's always there. He just wants this to end, so he can move on with his life, and forget about her. She betrayed him, and he wasn't ready to forgive her. He didn't know if he ever will. Matt text Jimmy, and told him he was leaving if he wanted a ride, but he said he would hitch with Johnny. He climbed in his car, and drove home, the radio playing quietly in the background as he tried to push the woman out of his thoughts.

Matt walked into a quiet house, and was greeted at the door by Jasper. He was still here, Lilly took him to Vegas with her, and Kim hasn't been by to get him since they've been back. Matt scratched his head hello, and found himself hoping she would show up to get him just so he could see her again. He quickly pushed it away with a sigh, and headed strait for the game room. He needed to get her out of his head, and what better way to do that than virtually killing people. He flicked on the light, relieved that no one was in here.

Matt walked over to the tv, and turned it on before grabbing a controller, and turning on the Xbox. He sat on the couch, and kicked his feet up on the coffee table as he joined a random online game. He should have known his alone time would be short lived, and it wasn't long after he started playing that the couch dipped down next to him. Matt glanced at Tammy out of the corner of his eye as she turned on her own controller, and joined his game. They sat in silence for a moment as they played, and soon it didn't bother him anymore that he wasn't alone.

"How's McNicholes?" Tammy finally asked. He wasn't the real reason why she came in here, but he was going to be the conversation starter. "Good. Agreed to leave us alone." he said as he shot someone on the other team. "Really?" she questioned. She didn't think he would agree to it. "Yep, and we're going to help him with his campaign next election." Matt told her. "What's he running for?" she asked as she took out another member of the other team. "Governor." he said. "And you're cool with that? I thought you hated him?" she asked with a half smile. "I do, but that doesn't mean he wouldn't be right for the job. He does his job for the right reasons, and can look past things to do what's right. I think he would be a great Governor." Matt explained.

Tammy nodded, "Okay, glad you guys could work something out," she said, "Now what about Kim?" she asked catching him off guard, and getting him killed. "What about her?" he asked kind of low, not wanting to really talk about it. "Are you going to talk to her?" she asked as his character respawned. "Hadn't planned on it." he said getting back into the game. "That's what I thought." she mumbled before putting a bullet in his character. "What the fuck!? We're on the same team!" he snapped a little surprised.

Tammy looked at him with nothing but seriousness, "That's for being stupid." she said. Matt glared at her for a moment as he waited for his character to respawn again. "Don't look at me like that. You know you're being stubborn moron." she said. "She lied, and kept secrets from me." he tried defending his reasoning. "I remember some people that lied, and kept secrets from me," she replied, killing him again, "Your argument is invalid." she said. "Will you fucking stop that. I don't want to talk to her! I don't want to see her!"

Tammy rolled her eyes, "Quit lying to yourself. You can't stop thinking about her. I can see it on your face when your just sitting there quiet, and not talking to anyone. Lost in you own thoughts about her. You're not very good at hiding your emotions." she told him before killing him once again. Matt let out a frustrated huff, and threw his controller to the coffee table. "It doesn't change what she did." he said clearly angry. "No, but everything she did after does. Jesus Christ Matt, she put everything on the line for you. Her job, her freedom, her life, shit she even saved yours. That girl loves you! Quit being an ass and fucking forgive her!" Tammy snapped growing angry herself with his stubbornness.

Matt sat quiet for a moment. He wasn't ready to see her again, but he knew she was right. "You fucking irritate the hell out of me." he said low. "Only cause you know I'm right." she mumbled with a slight grin. Matt shook his head with his own half smile. He let out a heavy sigh, and rested his hands in his head. "I need more time." he whispered. "She's given you a week. Brian didn't even give me 24 hours." Tammy reminded him. Matt looked up at her, "You're not going to let this go, are you?" he asked, and she grinned at him. "You know just as well as I do, I can be just as stubborn as you can." she said before killing his character one more time, even though he wasn't holding his controller.

Matt stood up, and shut off the Xbox. "Hey I wasn't done." Tammy pouted. "Looks like you are." he said with a smug grin. "You're mean." she mumbled as she set her controller down on the table. "I'm mean?" he asked with amused surprise, "You're the one that kept team killing me." he told her. "I only did it for your own good." she replied. "Yeah I'm sure." he responded. "I did," she defended, "You're the one being a stubborn jackass. I just wanted to help you see that." she said giving him an innocent smile.

Tammy stood up from her seat, and walked over to him. "She made you happy, Matt. We could all see the change in you. You weren't as short tempered, or closed off. You didn't seem miserable anymore. I don't want to see you go back to that. None of us do. Which is why you need to talk to her. You need to let her explain herself then maybe you can understand why she didn't tell you. Maybe you can forgive her." Matt gave her a small defeated nod. Tammy smiled, and gave him a supportive hug that he returned. "People make mistakes," she whispered, "It's how they come back from them that's important."

Notes

Sorry about the late update guys. Things have been busy and stressful around here lately, but all is good now :)
Think Matt is going to listen, and talk to Kimmie? Find out in the next chapter which I'm sad to say will probably be the last, but I might do an epilogue :)