In just a short amount of time, Zacky has adopted me and welcomed me into the family. I know I wasn't officially adopted by him but I consider him, Gena and the boys family. It was now it was 2 days before Christmas and I sent all my friends and my mom gifts for Christmas. Gena and I were decorating the house when the boys came through the door. Jimmy ran over to my and stole the candy cane I had in my mouth.

"Hey! That's mine Jimmy." I said and he stuck it back in my mouth. Smiled and he sat down on the couch with the rest of the guys and watched us. I kept looking over at the periodically as Brian stared at me. I couldn't understand why but I paid him no mind.

I thought he always did that but he has a girlfriend that no one likes. Not even her own sister Val likes her and that is truly odd. Anyways, Gena and I finished up with the decorations and started making something for dinner.

IT'S YOUR FUCKING' NIGHTMARE!!

I looked down seeing Damien's name light up on the screen. I picked up the phone and answered it.

"Hey Damien what's up?" I asked getting me a glass of water.

"Raven I have something to tell you and I need you to listen."

I could tell in his voice that something was extremely wrong. I started to get nervous.

"What's going on Damien?" I asked taking a drink of my water.

"Your mom told me if there was anyway I could get a hold of you to do so because your mom....."

"Damien...What's wrong with my mom?" I said nervously. I heard him take a deep sigh.

"Your mom has cancer...Breast cancer in it's last stage and it spread to her lymph nodes and there is no way she can be cured."

I squeezed the glass in my hand until it shattered.

"You can't be serious?" I said a tear falling down my cheek.

"I'm serious and you're mom would like to see you because she won't make it after Christmas."

"I'll be there. Don't worry I'm leaving right now." I said and I hung up the phone before he could say anything else. I sat down on the floor and looked at my hand. Brian came into the kitchen and seen me sitting in a pool of my own blood.

"Oh my God Raven! Are you alright?" he said wrapping my hand in paper towels yelling for Zacky. I seen Zacky and the rest of the guys bust into the kitchen. Zacky bent down next to me and Gena in front of me.

"What happened Raven?" Zacky asked. I looked over at him and the tears flowed down my face.

"I need to get to Tennessee...My mom doesn't have long to live. She ain't going to live past Christmas." I said getting up and running to my room. I slammed the door and started packing my clothes into my back pack. Zacky rushed into my room and seen what I was doing and sat down.

"I'll be back Zacky. I promise." I said and I continued to pack.

"You ain't going alone. I sent all the guys to get packed and meet back here. We are going to see your mom." he said and I smiled and hugged him. I finished packing and walked downstairs with my backpack and guitar. The other guys were waiting outside and they put my stuff in the huge SUV. We drove to the airport and got on the plane after purchasing a ticket.

I sat down in the seat looking out the window watching the city slowly fade away. I closed my eyes and before I knew it I was asleep. I was awaken by someone carrying me off the plane and I opened my eyes seeing it was Brian. He didn't even look down until he had to put me in the car. I smiled and sat down in the front seat and putting on my seat belt. Matt drove us to where I used to live and we rushed over to the house. When we arrived I seen my mom's car and my friend's standing outside. Matt stopped the car and before he could shut off the engine, I jumped out and hugged all my friends tightly.

"Show me my mom." I said and they all led my into the bed where my mom was. I looked at her and I instantly felt the tears running down my face. I wiped them away as she smiled at me. I sat down on the bed and held her hand in mine.

"I'm home for Christmas mom. Do you need anything?" I said squeezing her hand.

"No sweetheart but thank you for the gift. I received it a week ago. I haven't opened it yet." she said and I got up grabbing the gift and sitting it in her lap.

"Mom, my friend Damien told me that you might not survive passed Christmas or even to Christmas but I want you to open it." I said and she began to slowly unwrap the package and she smiled as she seen the scrapbook. She opened it and her face instantly brightened up as she seen the pictures of me and Paul when I was very young.

I put pictures in there from when I left and what happened to me the days I was living out on my own on the streets but I never let her know where I was. I know she worried about me as she seen the pictures of me on the beach. I included the photos of me with Avenged Sevenfold and she smiled so wide when she seen Zacky playing a father and me rolling my eyes. I smiled when she did and she kept looking through the book until she was at the end and closed it setting it on the nightstand. She looked up at me.

"I love the gift. Are they taking good care of my baby?" mom said and before I could answer Zacky answered for me.

"Yes ma'am we are." he said and I turned around to see him smiling. I smiled back and looked at my mom once more.

"Can I talk to your friend alone?" She said and I nodded. I hugged and kissed her forehead and walked out of the room and into the living room to see my friends bugging the hell out of my boys. I just shook my head.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ZACKY'S POV~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I watched as she hugged and kissed her mom and walk out the door. Her mom motioned me over towards her and patted the bed where Raven was sitting. I gladly walked over and sat down in the same spot.

"So how has my little girl been doing? I mean she can put up one hell of a fight." her mom said and I laughed.

"She's an angel." I said and her mom started laughing hard.

"I see you haven't made her mad enough to put up a real fight. Man she can really argue with someone to get something." she stated smiling. I looked into her eyes and could see the pain she was in.

"Do you need anything ma'am?" I asked and she shook her head no.

"Well there is one thing you could do for me and that's stop calling me ma'am. My name is Rita." she said and I smiled.

"Well Rita my name is Zacky. Zacky Baker." I said extending my hand for to shake and she shook it.

"I know who you are. She always talked about Avenged Sevenfold. Synyster Gates is her favorite but mine is you. You seem like a nice young man and I would love it if you would full-fill one last request for me." she said and I nodded my head.

"I want you to take her back to California and you be her father. She gave her real father a chance but he wouldn't comply with her." she said and she could tell I was very confused.

"I know you're confused. She hasn't told you has she?" she asked and I shook my head no.

"Tell me what?" I asked still confused.

"Her step-dad died the day before her birthday when she was 5 years old. He was the only father figure she ever had..." She proceeded to share the story at what happened to her daughter and it was heartbreaking. I couldn't believe a father would treat his only daughter like that. He basically thought that she was nothing but a bastard child! That outraged me and I knew her mother could tell. She finished and all I could think about is that man better not come around while we are here because there will be one hell of a fight.

"Her father has never been there for her and now he wants to be there. If he comes to this house anytime during Christmas, I highly doubt he will though, but if he does you tell him to leave my property. I don't want him here and I know while she is here, she won't want him here either." she said rubbing her eyes.

"Don't worry. I promise you he will be escorted off the property if he refuses to leave." I said and she smiled confirming the promise.

"Now please rest up. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve and we want you to have all your strength to be able to get out of this bed and be able to spend Christmas around the beautiful tree that's in your living room." I said hugging her and kissing her cheek. I was about to leave when she grabbed my arm.

"Can you do me one last favor?" she said opening the drawer to the nightstand. She pulled out a piece of paper and handed it to me.

"Yes sure anything." I said and opened up the folded paper.

"Everything on that list I know she would want so could you please get it for me. I would go myself but I need my strength for tomorrow." she said smiling and I nodded that I would. I hugged her again and left the room and went to get started on the list she gave me. I walked into the living room to see her laughing with her friends having a good time and I wished she could be happy like that all the time. I stepped into the living room.

"I'm going out to do some Christmas Shopping. Does anyone need anything?" I asked and they all shook their heads no. I made my way out the door and into my car driving to the nearest mall to start my shopping.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~RAVEN'S POV~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I walked into the living room and the guys all looked over at me.

"How's your mom?" Johnny asked.

"She's weak but still so full of life. She loved my gift I made for her." I said smiling as I sat down on the floor next to Heather. We began talking about my life on the streets and Damien thought that it was a very brave thing of me to be living on the streets for so long and nothing ever happening to me.

I wish people would quit telling me that I mean I know I was a crazy chick...I mean I still am crazy and shit but I couldn't help think about what would happen in my life if my mom would be gone. I suppose it would be just like when my step-dad left us. I'll never be able to get over it and live my life right. We kept on talking about things that happened here while I lived here and Heather just had to mention the time we went to Smokey Mountain Knife Works and I asked her if the water in there was real. I felt like such a blonde but it made everyone laugh. I never knew I could be that dumb. I knew I would never live it down. Craig and Nicole were asking them questions about their tours and how was the life of a popular rock star. Nicole and Heather can be real chatterboxes sometimes. I looked over and seen Zacky standing in the doorway.

"I'm going to do some Christmas shopping, does anyone need anything?" he asked and we all shook our heads no. He left soon after that and we all started talking away again. I stood up and left the room and walked into mom's bedroom watching TV. I sat down on her bed and smiled at her.

"So what did you two talk about?" I asked and she shrugged her shoulders.

"Oh come on mom. I know you all talked about something." I said and she sighed.

"I asked him to make sure if your father shows up to have him to be escorted off the property because I don't want him over here and I know you sure as hell don't....and I might have asked him to go Christmas shopping for you." she said smiling.

"Thanks mom. Those guys are so protective of me. Johnny, Matt, and Brian are like a big over protective brothers, Jimmy is the clown of the gang, and Zacky is like a father to me..." I said and stopped at what I had just said about Zacky. Mom looked at me and smiled.

"I told him to be your father when I'm gone. He said he would and he would be honored to do so for such a little angel." she said mocking his voice.

"Ha ha! He hasn't seen the damage I can do though." I said laughing and it made her laughter return.

"Hell that's what I told him and he just laughed." she said and we laughed again. Mom looked at me with a serious expression.

"I need something from you too." she said and I nodded.

"I would love for you to sing 4 songs at my funeral. 3 of my favorite and one that Chris Tomlin song...Oh hell what was it?" she said and I thought about it and it finally came to me.

"You mean Amazing Grace (My Chains are Gone)?" I said and she nodded.

"Yeah that one I want at the burial site. You playing and singing it." she said and I nodded and smiled and she knew I was saying yes. We sat there a little while longer until mom fell asleep. I got up and went back to the living room to join the others and see what they were up too.

I walked in and Brian was playing one of their songs on my guitar with Matt singing and Jimmy beating his knees to the beat. I think the song was called Afterlife.

Like walking into a dream
So unlike what you've seen
So unsure but it seems
'Cause we've been waiting for you

Fallen into this place
Just giving you a small taste
Of your afterlife here so stay
You'll be back here soon anyway

I see a distant light
But girl, this can't be right
Such a surreal place to see
So how did this come to be, arrived too early?

And when I think of all the places I just don't belong
I've come to grips with life
And realize this is going too far

I don't belong here, we gotta move on, dear
Escape from this afterlife
'Cause this time I'm right to move on and on
Far away from here

A place of hope and no pain
Perfect skies with no rain
Can leave this place but refrain
'Cause we've been waiting for you

Fallen into this place
Just giving you a small taste
Of your afterlife here so stay
You'll be back here soon anyway

This peace on earth's not right (With my back against the wall)
No pain or sign of time (I'm much too young to fall)
So out of place don't wanna stay
I feel wrong and that's my sign
I've made up my mind

Give me your hand
But realize I just wanna say goodbye
Please understand I have to leave
And carry on my own life

I don't belong here, I gotta move on, dear
Escape from this afterlife
'Cause this time I'm right to move on and on
Far away from here

Got nothing against you
And surely I'll miss you
This place full of peace and light
And I'd hope you might
Take me back inside when the time is right

Loved ones back home all crying
'Cause they're already missing me
I pray by the grace of God
That there's somebody listening

Give me a chance to be that person I wanna be (I am unbroken, I'm choking on this ecstasy)
Oh Lord, I'll try so hard but
You gotta let go of me (Unbreak me, unchain me, I need another chance to live)

I don't belong here, I gotta move on, dear
Escape from this afterlife
'Cause this time I'm right to move on and on
Far away from here

Got nothing against you
And surely I'll miss you
This place full of peace and light
And I'd hope you might
Take me back inside when the time is right

The song ended and I clapped letting my presence known. I walked in and sat down beside Damien this time.

"That was sooo awesome!" Nicole said smiling.

"Thank but do you want to know what would be really awesome?" Matt said and we all looked at him anxiously.

"I think Raven should do a song for us." Matt said and everyone agreed. Brian handed me my guitar.

"Alright alright. I've been working on a song and it's called Tough." I said and began to play and sing. I knew the guys didn't listen to much country but I knew that would probably love this one. I started playing and singing.

She’s in the kitchen at the crack of dawn
Bacon’s on, coffee’s strong
Kids running wild, taking off their clothes
If she’s a nervous wreck, well it never shows
Takes one to football and one to dance
Hits the Y for aerobics class

Drops by the bank, stops at the store
Has on a smile when I walk through the door
The last to go to bed, she’ll be the first one up
And I thought I was tough

She’s strong, pushes on, can’t slow her down
She can take anything life dishes out
There was a time
Back before she was mine
When I thought I was tough

We sat there five years ago
The doctors let us know, the test showed
She’d have to fight to live, I broke down and cried
She held me and said it’s gonna be alright

She wore that wig to church
Pink ribbon pinned there on her shirt
No room for fear, full of faith
Hands held high singing Amazing Grace
Never once complained, refusing to give up
And I thought I was tough

She’s strong, pushes on, can’t slow her down
She can take anything life dishes out
There was a time
Back before she was mine
When I thought I was tough

She’s a gentle word, the sweetest kiss
A velvet touch against my skin
I’ve seen her cry, I’ve seen her break
But in my eyes, she’ll always be strong

There was a time
Back before she was mine
When I thought I was tough

The song ended and tears began to flow down my face uncontrollably. Damien rubbed my back calming me down as he wiped away my tears. I was so grateful to have friends who would comfort me when something happens or a tough song comes on. I heard the door open and I was expecting Zacky to walk in the door but it wasn't. It was my brother in his uniform. He was buffed up a lot since I seen him last.

"Derrik?" I said and he turned his attention to all of us in the living room and he didn't look happy to see me.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" he said as I stood up. He walked into the living room setting his bag down.

"I'm here for Christmas with my friends. I came to see mom who happens to be dying in the next room." I said calmly. The way he looked at me, I should have been prepared for what happened next. He raised his hand and slapped me in the face knocking me to the floor. I held my face and Brian had him up against the wall.

"Don't you touch her again!" Brian and Matt yelled in unison. I looked up at them and I stood to me feet. Damien held me back so I wouldn't go after him and do something stupid.

"That little bitch is not welcome here in my house!" he yelled and I wanted so bad to knock him on his ass but Damien's had a grip on my arm that he wouldn't let go. I heard a scratching noise and I looked and seen mom walking down the hall towards us. When she reached us she spoke sternly.

"Son this is still my house and I say who is welcomed here not you. Damn you are too much like your father it ain't even funny." she said and I could tell she was getting angry.

"Mom don't get upset over him. If he wants to spend Christmas with us as a family no matter who is here, he should respect that. If not he can have Christmas with his father." I said and she nodded.

"What's it going to be? You have Christmas with us or your father?" mom said crossing her arms across her chest. Derrik picked up his bag and left the house without a word. I knew he made his decision. I could care less anyways. I helped mom back to her room to lay down and relax. She didn't say a word but went back to sleep a few minutes later. I walked into the living room and apologizing and they waved it off.

"You have nothing to say sorry about. He came in here raising hell." Matt said and I just smiled and went into the kitchen to get something to drink. I heard the door open again and this time it was Zacky. He came in trying to keep the bags from me but I didn't care about what was in them right now.

He took the stuff to mom's room and came back out. I was back in the living room and we all were talking until the late hours. I looked at my phone seeing it was midnight and I needed to go to bed. I went into my old room and it was the same as when I left it. I had my name painted on the wall in bright neon green with vines popping out of it and a cross in the middle of the wall with vines attached to it. I laid down on the bed covering myself up and falling to sleep.

Notes

comments?

really long isn't it?