I’m pacing back and forth in front of Huntington Beach Hospital waiting. Waiting for Zack to get here and talk my ass through this and for news that the love of my life hasn't succumbed to her death. The thought alone send shivers all through me. The thought that the last thing she said to me was that it was too late. It's almost like she knew we'd be here. Fuck, maybe she did. All I know is that I have to talk to her as soon as I can. I can't bear this. I pull yet another cigarette from it's pack and attempted to place it between my lips but failed due to my shaking hands instead it found it's home on the cold ground.

"Son?" I hear a familiar voice call from behind me.

"Dad, what are you doing here?" I reply trying my best to ignore my unsteady voice.

"Alice called. She said she thought you'd need me." he replied with a knowing smile.

"I don't really wanna talk right now. Shit, I don't even know what to say right now." I confessed.

"You're probably in shock." He said dryly.

"No. Dad, of all the things I do feel shock isn't one of them. I knew she had a fucking problem. I knew she had overdosed before. I should have locked her ass up to make sure this never fucking happened."

"This isn't you fault, son." Dad said as he walked over and placed his hand on my shoulder.

"Don't." I demanded as I took a step back from him. "This is all my fault. You don't have the slightest clue."

"So tell me, Brian. How is this your fault? She left you." He reasoned.

"She left me because she was pregnant! She left me because I was a selfish dick!" I confessed.

"Wait, does that mean you're a father? I'm a grandpa?" He asked excitedly.

"I was. You were." I said. I walked over to the hospital wall and slid down.

"What do you mean?" My dad asked confusion etched in his face.

"He died in a car accident."

"Oh, my lord. When it rains it pours."

"Do you see it now? This is all my fault. It's my fault she left. It's my fault that she met her dick of drug dealer boyfriend. It's my fault they wrecked. It's my fault that she's in this fucking hospital inches from fucking death this is all on me!" I exclaimed as I pounded my fist into the concrete beside me.

"How is it you fault the wrecked, Gates?" Zacky asked as he walked over to stand next to my dad.

I'm not sure how long he's been out here but it doesn't really matter.

"You know that asshole she was or is dating?"

"Yeah?"

"I thought she met him after Jacob died but I was wrong."

They were both looking at me expectantly.

"Alice drove me over here and told me the stuff that Marilyn didn't about the night Jacob died."

"Which was?" Zacky questioned.

"Well, she said that he was abusive towards 'Lyn and she would just brush it off as him being stressed over work. She said the 'Lyn knew he was a drug dealer but that she brushed it off because he took care of her and Jacob." I explained the venom seeping through my words as I spoke of the man that has thoroughly ruined my life.

Zacky came over and sat down beside me and urged me to carry on.

"Well, Alice said that they night of the accident Marilyn called her and she was frantic. She said that 'Lyn was crying and was telling her that her and Jacob were coming to stay there. Alice said that she asked her what was wrong and she said that he went after Jacob and she knocked him out so they could get away."

I had to stop the story to compose myself. As the words left me the scene played out in my head and it made me want to kill that piece of shit. After a moment I continued.

"Alice said that she heard 'Lyn say that he was following them and then the line went dead."

"Brian, I still fail to see how that's your fault." Zacky said and my dad agreed.

If I have to hear one more time that this isn't on me I will not be able to control myself. I got my moment of relief when I saw Marilyn's mom come through the sliding hospital doors. Tears ran down her face.

"She's okay." She said with a smile. "She's sleeping now. But you can go see her."

Notes

alrighty well, there ya go. so just a recap

Charlie is an asshole and Brian feels guilty and angry

give me some comments my lovelies!