"WHAT?!" I screamed at Matt.
Val held me in her arms as I started to break down. "Shhh, baby. Come on, we'll drive you," she said, rubbing my back.
In the car, I sat in the backseat as Val still held me while I cried and Matt drove as fast as he could. It was taking too long to get there and the closer we got to the hospital, the more I could feel my heart breaking.
What if I lost my Jimmy? I would never be able to get over it. I was having his children and I couldn't do this with out Jimmy.
Why did he do this?! Why did he drink when I had asked him to calm the drinking down? I was so angry, so sad and heartbroken.
When we finally pulled up to the emergency room entrance, I immediately jumped out of the car and ran for the double doors. It was pretty late so it was nearly empty except for Brian who was sitting in the waiting room with his head in his hands.
Brian looked up when he heard the doors open and he stood when he saw me. "Brooke..."
"Where is he, Brian? Where's Jimmy?!" I shouted. I wasn't mad at Brian but I was so scared that I was lashing out at the closest person.
He rubbed the back of his neck. "They just brought him in and took him straight to the back. They haven't said anything to me except that we can't see him."
I saw the doors that Brian was talking about and I headed for them. "Bullshit!" I said, not looking at my three friends. "I want to see my husband!"
The lady who was sitting behind her little window, saw me walking for the doors so she quickly came out and stood in front of me.
"I'm sorry, ma'am, but you can't go back there without a doctor's permission," she said holding her hands in front of her.
I looked her up and down. She was taller than me, but in the state I was in, I could take her. "Get the fuck out of my way! My husband is behind those doors and you nor anybody else is going to keep me from seeing him," I yelled as I tried to step around her but she was blocking my path.
"Ma'am, you need to please calm down and have a seat or I'm going to have to ask you to leave," she said standing up just a little bit straighter to show that she meant it.
I glared at her. "Just try it," I said and was starting to move around her again when I felt a strong pair of hands on my shoulders.
I looked around to see that it was Matt holding me back. "I'm sorry about her," he was saying to the nurse. "Brooke gets very worked up when she's emotional and that is her husband in there. And our best friend so I would really appreciate it if you kept us informed on what's going on with James Sullivan."
The lady gave me one more glance before she nodded at Matt and went back to her desk. Matt pulled me over to the chairs and pushed me down onto one of the chairs and gave me a stern look.
"We're all upset, Brooke, but you need to control yourself," Matt said. "I know you love him but you have to be patient or they will kick you out."
I crossed my arms over my chest like a child but I stayed quiet, knowing that I couldn't take Matt. Val sat next to me and rubbed circles on my back while Matt sat on her other side and held her hand. Brian was standing over by the entrance talking on the phone to the others and letting them know what had happened.
Soon, Zack came into the emergency room followed by Johnny and Michelle who went straight to Brian and hugged him tightly. Both Johnny and Zack came over to me and hugged me at the same time.
I had calmed down now, but I was just exhausted. I wanted nothing more than to go home and curl up in bed with Jimmy. I wanted us to be together and warm and safe.
I had tried to keep the darker thoughts out of my head, but when you're in the emergency room waiting on word about your husband who drinks and smokes with a heart condition, it's hard. I was now on one of the longer benches with my head on Zack's lap and my feet on Johnny's. Matt and Val were sitting together in one corner and Michelle was asleep on Brian's shoulder opposite me.
Looking at them I felt my heart breaking all over again. What if I lost Jimmy tonight and the last thing that happened with us was a fight?
It had already been over an hour and a half and the longer it took, the colder I felt. I just knew I was losing my husband, my best friend, my Jimmy. I felt the familiar sting of tears behind my eyes and I let them flow again not even caring that I was getting Zack's pants all wet.
Finally, after we had been waiting for over three hours, I saw a doctor come out from behind the forbidden doors. he saw our little group and headed straight for us. I immediately sat up and gave the doctor all of my attention.
"Are you all friends and family of James Sullivan?" the doctor asked.
We all nodded and I noticed that Michelle was awake and Matt was standing with his arm over Val's shoulders just next to the doctor.
"We're all really close," Matt said. "We grew up together."
The doctor nodded and looked at us three women. "Ok and which one is his wife?"
I stood. "I am," I said quietly. I was so scared that I was shaking. I knew I needed to be strong so I leaned down and grabbed both Johnny and Zack's hands, pulling them to stand beside me.
"Well, Mrs. Sullivan," the doctor said. He spoke so slow that I wanted to hit him until he told me what I wanted to know. "James, as I'm sure you know, has a heart condition and his over drinking has put some stress on it. With his drinking tonight, his heart couldn't take anymore and it caused him to black out."
I was squeezing both Zack and Johnny's hands so hard, I'd be surprised if they weren't bruised by tomorrow.
"When we got him here," the doctor continued. "His heart was trying its best to keep beating but it was failing."
The doctor kept pausing and everytime he did, I wanted to drop-kick him.
Brian spoke up now and I could tell he was just as aggravated at this doctor as I was. "Spit it out, doc!"
The doctor shot Brian a look then he turned back to me. "At one point, his heart did stop, but we were able to revive him. He is going to have to be under supervision for the next couple of days, but overall, James will live."
We all relaxed and I fell back onto the seats with a huge sigh of relief. Jimmy was alive!
"But," the doctor said. "You are going to have to watch him very closely and make sure he takes his medication. Under no circumstances whatsoever is he to mix alcohol with this medication. So James' drinking habits are going to have to change drastically."
I nodded and stood back up. "I understand. He won't be out of sight of any of us," I said and looked around for conformation. When everybody agreed, I finally smiled. It was a small smile, but it was there.
"Can we see him?" Matt asked.
The doctor shook his head. "I'm afraid not. Only the wife can be with him at this point. We've moved him to a room in the main part of the hospital," he said then he turned to me. "Mrs, Sullivan, James is sleeping right now, but my nurses have set you up a cot in his room so you can be there when he wakes up."
I nodded then I turned to my friends, my boys. "I'll call you all in the morning," I said as I hugged each and every one of them. "Thank you so much."
They said their goodbyes, left, and I followed the doctor. We went upstairs in an elevator and down several hallways until we came to a door with the number 69 on it (I laughed inside, knowing that Jimmy would get a kick out of that). The doctor opened the door for me and I stepped inside.
I had never liked hospitals because they had always given me the creeps. And now, seeing my husband's thin frame hooked up to tubes and monitors, the feeling was increased.
Jimmy's sleeping face was so pale that I could see rings under his eyes and the handcuffs around his neck stood out even more.
The doctor pointed to a cot in the corner of the room. "That's for you, Mrs. Sullivan. I'll leave now so you can get some rest and I will be back in the morning. Goodnight," he said as he walked out of the room, closing the door behind him.
I was utterly exhausted, but I didn't even glance at the cot. I was going to sleep with my husband tonight no matter what. I kicked off my shoes and turned the light out. I could still see because a dim lamp was turned on on the bedside table.
I moved to Jimmy's right side since all of the machines were on his left and I carefully climbed onto the bed with him. I turned the lamp off then I got as comfortable as I could get on this hospital bed. Jimmy didn't move as I got under the blankets and laid my arm over his chest. It was a tight fit but since we were both so skinny, it worked out fine.
I rested my head on the pillow and soon I was asleep curled up next to Jimmy.

Notes

There you go!
You didn't actually think I would kill him did you?! I wouldn't be able to handle that. I made y'all freak though, so I did a good job.
Comments and cookies, my loves <3