Promise You Paradise

“Woah… that was, that was… help me out here guys” I heard someone say all the way in the back. I looked up to see who exactly it was, and I think it was the shortest one, ‘cause he was still staring at Hailey all love-struck.

“Fucking amazing!” the tall one interjected. “Like seriously, that was just so unexpected, right guys, I mean they’re great. And Hailey, oh my Hailey, those guitar skills are fucking badass” He knelt down in front of her. “Right Brian, right, I mean you had to love that sound, so fucking smooth man. And she’s fucking left-handed, Zacky you got to say some shit here!”

I noticed Hailey didn’t enjoy having the tall one so close to her like that, and boasting on and on about her guitar playing. She was turning as red as ketchup, and I could see her hand slightly begin to shake. I went to stand beside her just as Brian started also on and on about her playing and apparently he knew the song and was amused by the choice. I, on the other hand, was getting annoyed. How can these guys not notice how Hailey’s getting. I grabbed tall guy by the shoulder and shoved him away from Hailey. “Shut the fuck up, guys!” I shout, standing protectively over my sister. “You guys are making my sister uncomf-…” I was cut off by snakebites quick apology on the guys’ behalf, which caught me off guard, he hasn’t really spoken much, so for him to be the first to do that. I cleared my throat.

“You know…” The tall one started, fuck I really need to learn these guys’ names. ‘We’re in a band and our band is fucking badass, no mega fucking badass, you should listen to us! I’m the best in the band of course, these fuckers are just my back-up and shit.”

“Wait, wait, wait, you guys were serious on that?!”

“Uh yea, Zacky here and Brian were just working on some new sound when you guys walked by here. We’re called Avenged Sevenfold and we’re going to be the best new metal band out there!” The tall one boasted on. “Matt and I write a lot of lyrics, we have band practices, you two should pass by sometime.”

“Sure, sure, so who plays what?” I ask, to keep the conversation going about them as Hailey calms down, plus I can probably figure the names out this way, and maybe actually care to remember. These boys were not as obnoxious as I first thought, although fuck if they keep making my sis uncomfortable, I’m going to have to punch them all for good measure.

“Well…” Jimmy said, skipping over to the short one. “Short shit over here is the bass player, we had someone else but this fucker basically mind-fuck our buddy into quitting. He used to come by and just keep telling everybody how much of a better player he is.”

“I am a much better player,” shorty says, crossing her arms over his chest. “And you fucking know it.” He looked up at me and smiled. “I think you have a little issue with the names, I’m Johnny. This fucker over here is actually Jimmy.” I let a small smile adorn my face and nod. At least one of the guys here seem to have a functioning brain.

“You can call his ass short shit though, it’s totally cool, seriously.”

“I would, but I’m pretty sure he’s about the same height as my sister, so nah, I’ll pass... but you can keep going on the band thing.”

Jimmy’s face lit up with a huge smile, and he just bounced away to the next two guys and slapped his hand son both their shoulders. “Zackster here is the rhythm guitarist, a fucking blessing this man, he’s here to keep this fucker, Brian, lead guitarist, in line. Keep that ego to a minimum.” I laughed as Brian rolled his eyes at Jimmy’s comment, clearly already accustomed to all this. Jimmy skipped over to Matt, who was leaning against a tree. “And Matt, you already absolutely know Matt, well, he’s the drummer of course. Look at these buff arms from all that heavy drumming, he’s fucking amazing. One of the fastest drummers I know, right Matt!”

Matt smiled, deep dimples forming at his cheeks. He looked at Hailey and me and shrugged. “I’m not all that amazing.”

“Well, since you can’t stop some punches, I’m going to agree with you on that one” I smirked. “So, Jimmy’s the singer then?” I ask, looking away from Matt’s twinkling eyes. I couldn’t help but think that something’s going on here, but it didn’t matter, because we should probably start heading home before my mom rises from her nap. “Okay amigos, it was lovely being a little sarcastic with you all, and you can all tune in in about a hundred years to hear another lovely performance, but for now Hailey and I must depart, ‘cause momma bear grounded my ass for kicking Matt’s and I don’t need an extra week for hanging with him.”

Hailey and I waved out goodbye and we walked out of the shadows of the tree. “You know something’s up with them right?” Hailey asked.

I smiled down at my sister. “Oh yes, of course I know, but it’s much more fun letting them think they got away with the lie.”

Notes

Overdose of the fuck usage ^_^

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