Nothing else matters

Ana’s POV

Next we were going to the studio to meet with the rest of the guys, Brian told me that Romy and Val will be there too. I was closer with Romy now, we have spent a lot of time together on the tour. When we went inside she was already there with Zacky, they looked really happy. I smiled for myself, I still remembered the moment on the bus, but I'm glad that finally everything worked out for them.
"Hey, I hope that you don't care what they write?" Jimmy looked at me curious.
"No, of course not." I lied. He smiled at me, yeah I'm good liar.
"Can we talk in private?" Larry the Manager of the guys asked me a moment later.
"Yeah, sure" What does he want to talk to me about in private?
We went outside and he looked pretty serious, "So I think that you read the newspapers?"
"Yeah, why?"
"You know they will always write what they want… I know that it isn't true, but.."
"But what?"
"The fans don't know. They will believe it." He just stared at me.
"And what does that mean?" I was getting a bad feeling.
"First we had to cancel the tour, because of Matt's illness. Now all the bad press. Brian is one of the most liked from band. Without the fans they would be nothing. And to be honest, they hate this situation. You know what I mean, there are a lot of fan-girls around the world.”
"Larry, come to an end, what do you really wanna say?" I was getting angry.
"Ana, I like you, really. But I'm a little afraid. Fans buy tickets for shows, and if they won’t do that..." He left the sentence unfinished.
"You mean that I am ruining his career?" I asked him suspiciously.
"This whole situation is not good and to be honest it will only get worse."
“What should I do? What can I do?"
"I don't know, maybe it will be better if you won’t be on any shows and won’t be seen together or..." "Stop, I don't want to hear this 'or'" I interrupted him.
I knew what he wanted to say, and I hated to even think about this. But what if it was the only way to prevent the worst?
I love Brian and for sure, I didn't want to be the reason to destroy his career. We were on studio for 2 more hours. I couldn’t concentrate on anything. Romy wanted go with me to some club tonight, but I want spend this night with Brian.
"Baby, why you are you so sad?" he asked me when we were at home again.
"I'm not, really" I tried to fool him with my smile and it worked.
"Come here" He said and embraced me tight.
"I love you so much Brian" I said and I felt tears in my eyes. No stop Ana, just stop. "I'm tired, come let’s get to bed." Brian finally said. He didn’t seem to notice my turmoil.
On the next morning when I was awake, I looked at Brian, he was still asleep. My stomach shrank at the thought of my next step. Because that would mean that this was the last time I would wake up next to him. But I just love him too much to hurt him in any way.
"Brian”, I kissed his neck and he immediately open his beautiful brown eyes.
"You have to pick up Jimmy in 40 minutes, so hurry up, babe."
"Oh, no.. I wanna stay here all day" he said sleepy.
After I got Brian to finally stand up and sit with me at the kitchen table, he looked at me curiously.
"Come on babe, eat some breakfast" he grabbed my hand.
"You haven’t eaten a lot in the last days."
"I'm not so hungry" I smiled at him.
After I finally ate some breakfast with him he kissed my lips and went out.
Okay, so I have 4 hours before he returns. I took my phone out and called Kate.
I called her and asked her to help me. 30 minutes later she was here.
When I opened the door, she looked shocked.
"Oh my God, you're living here?"
"Well yes… But come on in, we have not much time"
We went to the bedroom and started to pack all my things back into cartons.
"Can you tell what happened? Did he hurt you?", Kate sounded really concerned.
"No, he wouldn’t do anything like that. Its just for the best, I will tell you all the details later, ok!?”
She looked at me, and saw that I was about to cry. So we just finished packing all my things without any words. We put all boxes into her car.
“I’ll wait here for you”Kate said and hugged me again, and I walked into Brian’s house again for one last time. I was feeling sick. Really fucking sick.
I took a piece of paper and started write a goodbye letter for Brian while tears were running down my face.
I put the letter and my keys on table with a shaking hand. Then I looked one last time around this beautiful house, I'm started to cry even harder then I turned around and ran away. I jumped into Kate car and we drove off in silence my sobbing was the only noise.
This was the worst day of my life, I hate myself for it. It was so hard to say goodbye, but I know that I had to do it. When I left his house behind, I felt like my heart crash into a millions pieces, it felt like my life had come to an end.

Brian's POV

"Baby I'm back!" I yelled when we went inside.
"Yeah, Annie, Come on eat something, we brought dinner." Jimmy said.
But she didn't answer. "Ana?" I yelled again, but nothing.
"She’s not here?"Jimmy asked.
"I don't know, she should be, I'll check give me a second maybe she is upstairs sleeping or something"
But she was not at home, so I called her, but all I heard is 'number is not available' "She shut her phone off phone"
I went to the kitchen for a glass of water and noticed a letter on the table.
"Oh wait, she left a message" I said to Jimmy and started to read.

Dear Brian,
I am sorry that I cannot tell you this face to face, but it would just take one word from your lips or even just the look from your beautiful brown eyes and I would change my plan again and that I cannot allow.
All I want you to know is that the time we shared was the best time of my entire life! I will always love you and I will never forget the time we had together. I know it will be hard, but I have to do this. We can't be together any longer. I hope that on someday you will find a girl who will deserve your heart. I don't deserve it and I don’t deserve you. Please don't search for me; it'll be better this way.
I love you so much, A

I read it again and again. And then I noticed keys lying here too. I felt dizzy and sick. I have to sit down.
"And? What did she write? Where is she?" Jimmy asked but I couldn’t speak I just gave him the short letter.
I walked to the chair and sat down and took my head in my hand.
"What the fuck?!" Jimmy yelled, "That can't be true"
"Yes, you're right. I must, I must…" I pulled my phone out and called her again, and again, and again..
"I'll try" Jimmy called her as well, but also without an answer.
"Damn it, what's wrong?!"
"Fuck, nothing I know. We were talking before I went over to your house. Everything was normal…" "I don't believe it, Brian. Something must have happened…"
"She's gone." I said quietly. I looked at the keys.
"Fuck! She left me!" I screamed and threw the glass with water on the wall! It crashed into a million pieces just like my heart. This pain was so fucking strong that I can't even describe it and I just started to cry...

Notes

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