Promise Of A Lifetime
Held Back
I crushed the glass I had in my hand and they turned and looked right at me. The rage was back into my eyes. I didn't know what I was going to do next but I hope it's good.
"What the fuck is she doing?" I asked sternly almost yelling. They said nothing.
"I asked you a FUCKING question!!" I yelled and Brian, Jimmy, Johnny, and Zacky came running into the living room.
"What's going on? Aerial your hand." Brian said grabbing my hand gently. The blood poured from my palm and glass was sticking out of it.
"Why the fuck are you touching my boyfriend??" I asked directly at Angel and taking a step forward over the glass. I know Brian was cleaning it up and I clinched my bloody and cut up hand into a fist. The glass dug deeper into my palm.
"We were just talking." Angel said stepping back.
"You don't touch my man's chest and you don't touch anything on him. I do!" I said getting up in her face.
"Oh yeah and what are you going to do about? I can talk to whoever I want." Angel yelled into my face and without thinking about my stitches or staples I lunged at her punching her face and scratched her across the face with my long fingernails.
Matt pulled me off of her and pulled me towards Zacky and Zacky held me until I was calm. Matt looked at me and I slapped him right in the face. I looked right at Angel with a death glare.
"Get the fuck out bitch." I said calmly but with still rage in my heart and soul. I watched as she left slamming the door behind her. I looked down at my hand and then up to Matt. Zacky let me go and I pulled up my shirt and checked my staples. They were fine. I looked at my hand and seen the blood pouring onto the floor. I pulled the shard of glass out of my hand and placed it into Brian's hand.
"What do you think you were doing?" I asked Matt.
"I told her she shouldn't touch me because I'm with you. She wouldn't listen to me."
"Then why didn't you leave the fucking room!" I yelled balling up my fists. Brian came back into the room with a first aid kit and looked at my hand and cleaning it with alcohol. I didn't even flinch as the alcohol swab ran over my hand. I just stared at Matt waiting for his answer and he didn't answer. I looked down.
"You know how I've been hurt. I'm fucking hurting right now! Can I be spared just a little pain for one fucking lifetime? I guess not!" I said pulling my hand away from Brian and walking out the front door. I walked and walked and walked until I came to the beach and I just sat in the sand watching the sun rising higher into the blue sky. I thought to myself that I wish my uncle and brothers would have just killed me and got it over with. I sat there before I heard the sound of Matt's car pull up at the beach. I didn't even look up when I seen him sit down beside me.
"Baby? I'm really sorry. I know I should have walked away. I would never hurt you." Matt pleaded.
"I know. I guess I just went back to all the times that I was hurt and when I seen her touching you, I thought I was going to lose you." I hung my head down and Matt reached over and pushed my chin up.
"You don't have to worry about losing me because you will never and I mean you will never lose me. I love you way to much to ever leave you." I smiled and leaned into his shoulder. He put his arm around my back and rubbing my arm with his hand. I laid my head on his shoulder and he kissed it.
"I'm so sorry baby I don't know why I acted like that. Looks like I'm going to need a new therapist. I know she won't be coming back." I said trying to get to my feet. I felt myself being lifted up into Matt's arms and being carried over to his car. I sat down in the passenger seat and we headed back to Brian's. I laid my head against the window and watched the buildings pass by quickly until I fell asleep.
"What the fuck is she doing?" I asked sternly almost yelling. They said nothing.
"I asked you a FUCKING question!!" I yelled and Brian, Jimmy, Johnny, and Zacky came running into the living room.
"What's going on? Aerial your hand." Brian said grabbing my hand gently. The blood poured from my palm and glass was sticking out of it.
"Why the fuck are you touching my boyfriend??" I asked directly at Angel and taking a step forward over the glass. I know Brian was cleaning it up and I clinched my bloody and cut up hand into a fist. The glass dug deeper into my palm.
"We were just talking." Angel said stepping back.
"You don't touch my man's chest and you don't touch anything on him. I do!" I said getting up in her face.
"Oh yeah and what are you going to do about? I can talk to whoever I want." Angel yelled into my face and without thinking about my stitches or staples I lunged at her punching her face and scratched her across the face with my long fingernails.
Matt pulled me off of her and pulled me towards Zacky and Zacky held me until I was calm. Matt looked at me and I slapped him right in the face. I looked right at Angel with a death glare.
"Get the fuck out bitch." I said calmly but with still rage in my heart and soul. I watched as she left slamming the door behind her. I looked down at my hand and then up to Matt. Zacky let me go and I pulled up my shirt and checked my staples. They were fine. I looked at my hand and seen the blood pouring onto the floor. I pulled the shard of glass out of my hand and placed it into Brian's hand.
"What do you think you were doing?" I asked Matt.
"I told her she shouldn't touch me because I'm with you. She wouldn't listen to me."
"Then why didn't you leave the fucking room!" I yelled balling up my fists. Brian came back into the room with a first aid kit and looked at my hand and cleaning it with alcohol. I didn't even flinch as the alcohol swab ran over my hand. I just stared at Matt waiting for his answer and he didn't answer. I looked down.
"You know how I've been hurt. I'm fucking hurting right now! Can I be spared just a little pain for one fucking lifetime? I guess not!" I said pulling my hand away from Brian and walking out the front door. I walked and walked and walked until I came to the beach and I just sat in the sand watching the sun rising higher into the blue sky. I thought to myself that I wish my uncle and brothers would have just killed me and got it over with. I sat there before I heard the sound of Matt's car pull up at the beach. I didn't even look up when I seen him sit down beside me.
"Baby? I'm really sorry. I know I should have walked away. I would never hurt you." Matt pleaded.
"I know. I guess I just went back to all the times that I was hurt and when I seen her touching you, I thought I was going to lose you." I hung my head down and Matt reached over and pushed my chin up.
"You don't have to worry about losing me because you will never and I mean you will never lose me. I love you way to much to ever leave you." I smiled and leaned into his shoulder. He put his arm around my back and rubbing my arm with his hand. I laid my head on his shoulder and he kissed it.
"I'm so sorry baby I don't know why I acted like that. Looks like I'm going to need a new therapist. I know she won't be coming back." I said trying to get to my feet. I felt myself being lifted up into Matt's arms and being carried over to his car. I sat down in the passenger seat and we headed back to Brian's. I laid my head against the window and watched the buildings pass by quickly until I fell asleep.
11/13/13