JC POV.

I watched in amazement as Syn began to record the guitar for one of the new songs on the record; Afterlife.

“I may have serious issues with the guy, but your guitarist can seriously play.” I commented, leaning back in my chair and stretching. Johnny grunted his agreement and continued to fiddle with various buttons.

“I still don’t understand why you don’t get on with him JC. When you get to know him, he’s really nice and sweet.” I looked over at Michelle and resisted the urge to sigh.

“Chelle, I’ve known him longer than you.” I reminded her gently.

“I know, but you don’t know him.” I closed my eyes, glad that she was sat behind me and couldn’t see me. Johnny nudged my leg with his foot. I looked over at him. The look on his face said: do not go there. He was right. It’d only piss Syn off, which in turn would piss me off even more. And considering that I was meant to be helping with the record that probably wouldn’t be a good idea. Syn finished playing and looked up at the window. Johnny gave him the thumbs up and began to fiddle with buttons, ready to play it back to Syn. He set his guitar down and walked out of the recording booth, to us. He sank onto one of the couches and yawned. Behind me, I heard Michelle get to her feet and walk over to him. Unfortunately they were just in the corner of my vision, which meant that I got to watch as she sat down on his lap and wrap her arms around his neck. His arms snaked around her waist. Thankfully Johnny hit ‘play’ before they could start sucking face. we listened to the playback in silence. As it finished Johnny nodded.

“Sounds fucking amazing dude. Even bitch-face here agreed when you were recording it.” I glared at him. I could see Syn smirking happily out of the corner of my eye.

“Even she is powerless to my amazing guitar skills.” I sighed again.

“Wonderful. Now he has an inflated ego. Thanks Johnny.” Johnny just grinned at me. I really wish that my glares worked on my brother. Johnny turned to ask Syn a question, but froze. I spun my chair round to face the irksome guitarist, only to freeze myself. He literally had his tongue down her throat and was feeling her up. I could have sworn my heart stopped for a moment. What the fuck was this aching pain in my chest? The realisation slowly hit. Holy fucking fudge cakes. I shook myself out of my mini-trance and got to my feet.

“You guys good without me now?” I asked, Johnny raised a curious eyebrow at me. I shook him off. He could always tell when there was something bothering me and no doubt he would annoy me senseless until I talked to him about it.

“Yeah, why?” He asked, still looking curious. On the couch, the two lovers still hadn’t surfaced for air. I refused to look. If I didn’t acknowledge the pain then it didn’t exist.

“I’m playing at Sacrifice tonight. I need to pick my shiz up and go set up for the guys.” I explained, grabbing my bag off the floor and moving towards the door. “Laters peoples.” I turned and almost sprinted out of the door. Determined to put him, her and this ache in my chest behind. I was telling the truth, partly; I was playing at Sacrifice tonight, but all of my stuff was already in my car and Will – one of the members of my band – was setting up tonight. I rummaged in my bag for my key, cursing, as I walked down Matt and Val’s driveway towards my car.

“Cait, wait!” The screen door to Matt and Val’s slammed shut. Closing my eyes and mentally grimacing/cursing even more, I turned to face him.

“What?” I asked, surprisingly calm. Syn ran a hand through his hair as he came to stop in front of me.

“I…uh… look…” He stammered. I continued to search for my keys.

“Hurry and spit it out already man, I’m going to be late.”

“We weren’t making you uncomfortable or anything were we?” My head snapped up to look at him,

“What?”

“Me and Michelle.”

“No, Syn you weren’t. I honestly have to go.” I replied, lying through my teeth. He didn’t give up.

“Because if we were, just say something and we’ll tone it down.” I looked at him curiously. He stuffed his hands in his pockets. He was staring at the floor. “Look, we may not get along most of the time, but you spend a lot of time hanging out with us. I don’t want to make you or the guys uncomfortable.” He glanced up and met my gaze. Dusk was falling, so it was hard to make out his expression, but he looked…I dunno … like he really meant it. I sighed and went back to searching for my keys.

“Thanks, but it’s fine. I’ll probably be the same, well similar, when I get a boyfriend.” I commented lightly, finally pulling my keys out of the depths of my bag. When I looked up, he’d stepped closer.

“Well, if that changes, just tell me Cait. Ok?” His voice was quiet. I nodded. A strand of hair came loose from behind my ear, falling forwards into my face. He gently brushed it back behind my ear. “Have a good show tonight, Cait.” He murmured, turning to walk back inside.

~*~

I rubbed my forehead with one hand as I knocked on Ash’s apartment door. Thankfully she only lived a block away from Sacrifice, so I had plenty of time to stop in at hers before my show tonight. She pulled the door open, smiling. Her smile fell when she saw my face.

“Babes? What’s wrong?” She asked, stepping aside to let me in. She shut the door behind me and pulled me into her arms. I closed my eyes, fighting the tears that wanted to fall.

“I have an hour until I have to be at Sacrifice and I need some serious girly counselling.” She let go of me and studied me for a minute before nodded.

“I shall go and summon Master Ben and Master Jerry from the freezer.” She announced, putting on a British accent and marching towards the kitchen. I laughed and followed her. I took a seat on one of the stools at the island and watched as she pulled three gallon tubs of Ben and Jerry’s from the freezer. Man, she knew how to stock a freezer.

“Jesus, do I really look bad enough for all of those?” Her look said everything. Apparently I did.

“Physically you’re as gorgeous as ever my little cherry blossom, but it’s your eyes that are telling me that you need all of this.” She gestured with her arm and the ice cream. Abruptly she turned round and pulled open a cupboard, rummaging through it. She pulled out a box full of chocolate sprinkles and sauce. She set it with a firm bang on the table. “And this.” I waited until she’s sat at a stool next to me, took a spoon off her and promptly dove into the tub of Phish Food. Once I’d had a few mouthfuls, Ash looked at me.

“Tell me all babes.” I sighed and took another spoonful of ice cream before beginning. I told her everything, from how Syn would sometimes act strange around me to my fucked up reaction to seeing him and Michelle sucking face. By the end I had moved on to Chunky Monkey and was fighting back the tears again.

“She’s such a slaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaag.” I looked at Ash, fighting twin urges to scowl at her for insulting my friend and to laugh at the expression on her face. Ash did not like Michelle. She grinned before taking a spoonful of Cookie Dough and covering it in chocolate sauce. Yes, we were totally grown up. “What, she is.” She wolfed down her spoonful and her grin grew even more evil. “She should totally move to Amsterdam, I here there’s a district that she’d fit in perfectly.” She winked and took another spoonful of ice cream as I choked on my own mouthful. I eventually recovered from my coughing fit.

“Despite the fact that she’s my friend, I am inclined to agree with you there.” Michelle had always been a little bit of a slut.

“Ignoring the bitch for a moment, what are you going to do about your other issue?” All the tension that our laughter and jokes had removed came crashing back down, hitting me like a tonne of bricks. I sighed and took a huge mouthful of ice cream, trying to avoid answering her. “Stuffing your face isn’t going to get you out of this. You need to talk to him.” I shook my head firmly. No way. Nu-uh. Absolutely not. That is the one thing that I will not be doing. It was Ash’s turn to sigh.

“You can’t just run and hide from this Jack. Look what happened last time.” I thought back to two years ago, when Syn had kissed me at Chase’s; a local rock n roll club that we all went to. I’d wanted to kiss him back that night. I’d ended up running from it. I didn’t confront him about it and he didn’t bring it up. We’d chosen to ignore it and now here it was, back to bite me on the ass. Figures.

“I know. But I can’t just go up to him and talk to him about it either.”

“And why not?” I looked at her. She always knew what I meant when I gave her that look. “Yeah, so you two bicker constantly like little kids. Maybe he actually wants to talk to you about it. What he said earlier obviously indicates that he feels bad about something. Most guys don’t offer to ‘tone it down’ for their best mates, never mind someone who they argue with constantly.” I knew she had a point but I didn’t want to admit it. To her or to myself.

“I am not talking to him about it.”

“Well what are you going to do about it?”

“I don’t know.” I knew what I wanted to do about it, but there was no way that I was going to do that either. Ash, unfortunately, knew me far too well. Her jaw dropped.

“Tell me that you are not thinking about turning into a flirt around him?” I looked away.

“Thinking about it and doing it are two entirely different things.” I replied. She sighed a breath of relief.

“Oh thank god. I love you and all babes, but that is a stupid idea.”

“I know.” I glanced up at her clock. “Shit! I have to be at Sacrifice! Like five minutes ago!” I jumped to my feet and grabbed my bag.

“This conversation is totally not over.” Stated Ash, following me to the front door.

“I know, I’ll be back later, if that’s ok. I don’t know what he’s doing tonight and I don’t want to run into him when I get home.” Yes, he was still living in my house. Regrettably.

“Avoiding him, isn’t going to make the situation go away either.”

“Again, I know. But for tonight it will make me feel better. Laters you sexy mushroom you.” I walked out of her apartment, waving over my shoulder. Her voice followed me down the corridor.

“Bring me back some cheesecake! I want cheesecake!”