JC POV.
I stirred slightly and stretched, yawning. The smell of Marlboros and cologne surrounded me. My pillow shifted slightly beneath my head.
“Morning beautiful.” I froze, suddenly remembering what had happened last night. Then it really sank in. Oh shit, what had I been thinking? Oh yeah that’s right – I hadn’t. Syn’s hand began to run through my hair. It was soothing. I’d always loved people playing with my hair. I felt myself beginning to relax against him, giving into the temptation to go back to sleep and forget it all. A knock on the door snapped me out of it.
“Jack? We need to leave in half an hour darlin’.” Called Zacky. I shot upright. Shit! It couldn’t be that time already could it?
“Yeah, ok, thanks Zack.” I called, trying not to panic and failing. I felt the bed move slightly as Syn sat up behind me. His hand rested gently on my back.
“Relax Cait. It’s fine.” I stood, moving away from his touch. It was too easy to think back to last night when he was touching me.
“No it’s not. Fuck! What was I thinking?” I paced around the room, angrily snatching my clothes up from the floor, deliberately not looking at him.
“Cait…”
“Go!” Behind me, he sighed.
“Cait, come on be reasonable … “
“Just go!” I ordered, walking into the bathroom and slamming the door behind me, leaning against it and closing my eyes. Why did I always have to make my life so complicated? Forcing myself to move, I turned the shower on and got under the jet of water as the first tears started to fall.

~*~

When I came out of the bathroom Syn was gone. I sighed in relief and began to gather my stuff together. I quickly slapped some concealer over the dark circles around my eyes and smudged some black eyeliner on. I looked and my reflection and sighed again. It was better than nothing. I shoved my feet into my converse and grabbed my bag, glancing briefly back at the bed before walking out of the room and out to the bus. Thankfully there was no visible sign of Syn when I got on the bus. I exchanged a good morning grunt with my brother and Zacky and headed for the bunks. My God, I was tired. I dumped my bag with the rest of my stuff and collapsed onto my bunk, drawing the curtains so I got some privacy. It didn’t take long for me to fall asleep. Although I woke up after about an hour, something was digging into my side. I reached down to discover my iPod, with a sticky note attached to it. This isn’t over. Sleep well Cait. Xx I pulled the sticky note off the iPod and shoved my headphones into my ears. I could deal with him later. Right now, all I wanted was sleep.

~*~

I managed to avoid my impending argument with Syn until that evening. The guys had gone to chill out with Corey Taylor and the rest of Stone Sour, I was going to join them once I’d finished doing my make-up. I was finishing off my eyeliner when the door opened. I knew who it was before they even spoke. I’d been waiting for him to pick his moment all day.
“Cait, we need to talk.” I closed my eyes briefly and grabbed my mascara tube.
“Then talk.” I could see his reflection in the mirror, he was stood just to the side of the door, watching me as I finished my mascara. Eventually he walked towards me, his hands resting on my waist as he stood behind me. I finished my mascara without any mistakes. Difficult when your heart is racing almost as fast as the speed of light; now that is what I call skills. He waited until I put the tube down before speaking.
“Last night…” I interrupted.
“Was a mistake.” His disbelieving expression was reflected in the mirror.
“Is that what you’re telling yourself?” He snorted and shook his head. “Cait, you can’t deny this anymore, we both know how we feel.” He moved, wrapping his arms around my waist, pulling me closer. I bit my lip. Yeah, I knew how I felt, but I wasn’t ready just to dive into a relationship with him. Hell, we struggled to get on as friends some days. He sighed when I didn’t say anything and let go of my waist. He leaned against the side that I was facing, his arms crossed and he stared at me. “Look at me.” I didn’t move. “Cait, look at me.” He repeated, reaching forward and gently tilting my head up so that I was looking at him. He studied my eyes for a while, as if he was looking for something. Apparently finished studying me, he leaned in and gently pressed his lips against mine. They were gone almost instantly, but my lips still tingled at the contact. “I don’t know what’s holding you back Cait, but I’ve already lost Jimmy, I’m not going to lose you as well.” His fingers dropped from my chin, falling to his side as he stood. I felt butterflies stir in my stomach as he said that. Jesus, butterflies JC? Really? Look what he’s doing to you. After a moments silence he spoke again. “I meant what I said on that note Cait, this isn’t over. One day, you’ll wear one of these” He reached up and touched the metal picks on my necklace that symbolised Johnny and Jimmy. “for me. That’s a promise JC.” Even if his eyes weren’t telling me how serious he was, I would have known after he called me JC. Even when we were having our worst fights, he never called me JC. He only ever used my real name when he was being deadly serious. I was frozen to the spot, his promise both scared and thrilled me at the same time. He gave me a small smile and kissed the deathbat tattoo behind me ear. “Johnny wants me to tell you to hurry up.” He whispered, his breath brushing across my ear. I nodded.
“I’ll …. I’ll be there in a minute.” I stuttered, still frozen. Then he was gone. Leaving me alone with the smell of Marlboros and his cologne and the butterflies that were trying to burst out of my stomach.