No one has to know.
Eight: Lean on me, when you're not strong, I'll be your friend, I'll help you carry on.
I would like to say that things went back to normal after Zacky kissed me, but then I would be lying to you. At first I was okay with it, he didn’t mean to kiss me and it was just a mistake, it could have been anyone that he kissed, it was just a mistake and he didn’t mean to do it, everyone makes mistakes right?
But then came Gena, every time she was over and I saw them cuddled up together on the sofa, or when I walked past his room and they’d be on his bed making out I couldn’t help but feel a stab of guilt in my chest. I’d kissed Zacky back, which mean in theory he’d gone behind Gena’s back. Neither of us had told her about the kiss, we decided she was better off not knowing about it, but I still couldn’t help but feel horribly guilty whenever I saw her, I think after about three weeks of it she’d realised something was up, and she confronted me about it in the kitchen. Right in front of Zacky too.
“Okay what’s going on with you Riley, you’ve been avoiding me like the plague”
“I haven’t” I said continuing on my search for Twinkies that I knew we no longer had.
“Yes you have, every time I walk into a room you run away” Shit had I been doing that?
“No I don’t”
“Yes you have”
“I really haven’t Gena, I swear”
“Girls are you really arguing about this?”
“Yes because I want to know why she’s avoiding me!” She stamped her pointy boot on the
kitchen tiles.
“Look Gena baby, if she says she’s not avoiding you, then she’s not, don’t get so pissy at
people, you’re just getting paranoid” He said trying to calm her down but evidently not choosing his words very carefully. I could tell an argument was about to kick off so I took it as my que to leave.
“No!” She held up a hand to me as she glared at her boyfriend “ Don’t go anywhere Riley” I stood still, figuring it was best not to defy her at this point “Did you just call me paranoid?” She hissed at him. He shifted nervously from one foot to the other, looking over helplessly at me, I just shrugged.
“Yes” He said “Because you’re being paranoid, why would Riley avoid you?”
“I’m being— I’m being paranoid?!”
“Gena calm down”
“Don’t you dare tell me to calm down Zacky Vengeance! I am not paranoid! You’re just being an idiot!”
“Oh I’m being an idiot now am i?!”
“Yes and you’re being a fucking inconsiderate asshole at that!”
“Well thank you very fucking much! Because you’re such a walk in the park!” He yelled back, I figured they were too wrapped up in their argument to notice me leaving now, I fucking hated when they argued, and to know that I was the cause of this argument, but I couldn’t let them keep on arguing, even if it scared the shit out of me to see Zacky get so angry that he looked like he was about to hit his girlfriend of four years.
“Stop it!” I yelled, tears burning my eyes and the back of my throat. “Just stop yelling at each other!” The last part came out like a hiccup sob.
“Oh Riley don’t cry” Zacky’s expression softened immediately and he came over to me, pulling my shaking frame against his chest.
“That’s right go to her like you always do”
“Oh shut up and stop being a heartless bitch” He snapped, she scoffed and I heard her heels stomping across the floor, a minute later I heard the front door slam. “Shh Riley you’re alright” He held onto me tightly.
“I hate that I caused that” I sobbed
“Shh no it wasn’t your fault she is just being paranoid, and you’re not avoiding her are you?”
“Yes”
“What?”
“I am”
“Why are you avoiding Gena?”
“Because I kissed you back” I sobbed. He stood up straight and he stepped back, frowning.
“What?”
“Because I kissed you back and I feel so guilty every time I see her, I know it was nothing, but I just feel bad”
I scrubbed my cheeks with the sleeve of my hoodie and looked up at Zacky, his face was a mixture of emotions ranging from sadness to confusion, to anger, to pain, and I couldn’t understand why.
“Well you don’t need to, it was a mistake, it’s not gonna happen again, you and I both know that” He said flatly.
“Yeah” I nodded and turned away from him, walking out of the kitchen and down the hall to my bedroom; I closed the door quietly and slid down against it, burying my face in my knees. I don’t know why I felt so rotten about it, but I knew that I felt shitty.
Right now there was only one person that I wanted to talk to, and she was only twenty minutes-drive away, therefore I decided to call her and tell her that I was coming over because I needed someone other than Zacky to cry to, because he was evidently mad at me for causing the argument between him and Gena, and he wouldn’t want to listen to me sniffle about how I like Brian and how him kissing me annoyed me and left me still confused.
I scrolled through my contacts until I came to the ‘M’ section, for ‘Mom’, I pressed the call button and waited for it to ring.
“ Riley baby !” Her happy voice answered the phone.
“Hi Mom” I said
“ Oh baby what’s wrong; don’t tell me nothing, I can tell you’ve been crying !”
“Can I come over Mom; I need someone other than Zacky to talk to”
“ Of course you can baby girl, I have some people over right now, but they’re leaving in a
minute, so come on over ”
“Okay Mom, I’ll see you in about half an hour” I said
“ Okay baby, I love you ”
“Love you too Mom” and then I hung up.
I got up from the floor and slipped my feet into some converse, brushed my hair and wiped off the old runny makeup, and put on some fresh eyeliner and mascara so that I didn’t look like I’d been crying so much. No doubt I was going to start blubbering all over again to my Mom, but if she had people then they would probably still be there by the time I got there, so I didn’t want to go over there looking like shit.
But then came Gena, every time she was over and I saw them cuddled up together on the sofa, or when I walked past his room and they’d be on his bed making out I couldn’t help but feel a stab of guilt in my chest. I’d kissed Zacky back, which mean in theory he’d gone behind Gena’s back. Neither of us had told her about the kiss, we decided she was better off not knowing about it, but I still couldn’t help but feel horribly guilty whenever I saw her, I think after about three weeks of it she’d realised something was up, and she confronted me about it in the kitchen. Right in front of Zacky too.
“Okay what’s going on with you Riley, you’ve been avoiding me like the plague”
“I haven’t” I said continuing on my search for Twinkies that I knew we no longer had.
“Yes you have, every time I walk into a room you run away” Shit had I been doing that?
“No I don’t”
“Yes you have”
“I really haven’t Gena, I swear”
“Girls are you really arguing about this?”
“Yes because I want to know why she’s avoiding me!” She stamped her pointy boot on the
kitchen tiles.
“Look Gena baby, if she says she’s not avoiding you, then she’s not, don’t get so pissy at
people, you’re just getting paranoid” He said trying to calm her down but evidently not choosing his words very carefully. I could tell an argument was about to kick off so I took it as my que to leave.
“No!” She held up a hand to me as she glared at her boyfriend “ Don’t go anywhere Riley” I stood still, figuring it was best not to defy her at this point “Did you just call me paranoid?” She hissed at him. He shifted nervously from one foot to the other, looking over helplessly at me, I just shrugged.
“Yes” He said “Because you’re being paranoid, why would Riley avoid you?”
“I’m being— I’m being paranoid?!”
“Gena calm down”
“Don’t you dare tell me to calm down Zacky Vengeance! I am not paranoid! You’re just being an idiot!”
“Oh I’m being an idiot now am i?!”
“Yes and you’re being a fucking inconsiderate asshole at that!”
“Well thank you very fucking much! Because you’re such a walk in the park!” He yelled back, I figured they were too wrapped up in their argument to notice me leaving now, I fucking hated when they argued, and to know that I was the cause of this argument, but I couldn’t let them keep on arguing, even if it scared the shit out of me to see Zacky get so angry that he looked like he was about to hit his girlfriend of four years.
“Stop it!” I yelled, tears burning my eyes and the back of my throat. “Just stop yelling at each other!” The last part came out like a hiccup sob.
“Oh Riley don’t cry” Zacky’s expression softened immediately and he came over to me, pulling my shaking frame against his chest.
“That’s right go to her like you always do”
“Oh shut up and stop being a heartless bitch” He snapped, she scoffed and I heard her heels stomping across the floor, a minute later I heard the front door slam. “Shh Riley you’re alright” He held onto me tightly.
“I hate that I caused that” I sobbed
“Shh no it wasn’t your fault she is just being paranoid, and you’re not avoiding her are you?”
“Yes”
“What?”
“I am”
“Why are you avoiding Gena?”
“Because I kissed you back” I sobbed. He stood up straight and he stepped back, frowning.
“What?”
“Because I kissed you back and I feel so guilty every time I see her, I know it was nothing, but I just feel bad”
I scrubbed my cheeks with the sleeve of my hoodie and looked up at Zacky, his face was a mixture of emotions ranging from sadness to confusion, to anger, to pain, and I couldn’t understand why.
“Well you don’t need to, it was a mistake, it’s not gonna happen again, you and I both know that” He said flatly.
“Yeah” I nodded and turned away from him, walking out of the kitchen and down the hall to my bedroom; I closed the door quietly and slid down against it, burying my face in my knees. I don’t know why I felt so rotten about it, but I knew that I felt shitty.
Right now there was only one person that I wanted to talk to, and she was only twenty minutes-drive away, therefore I decided to call her and tell her that I was coming over because I needed someone other than Zacky to cry to, because he was evidently mad at me for causing the argument between him and Gena, and he wouldn’t want to listen to me sniffle about how I like Brian and how him kissing me annoyed me and left me still confused.
I scrolled through my contacts until I came to the ‘M’ section, for ‘Mom’, I pressed the call button and waited for it to ring.
“ Riley baby !” Her happy voice answered the phone.
“Hi Mom” I said
“ Oh baby what’s wrong; don’t tell me nothing, I can tell you’ve been crying !”
“Can I come over Mom; I need someone other than Zacky to talk to”
“ Of course you can baby girl, I have some people over right now, but they’re leaving in a
minute, so come on over ”
“Okay Mom, I’ll see you in about half an hour” I said
“ Okay baby, I love you ”
“Love you too Mom” and then I hung up.
I got up from the floor and slipped my feet into some converse, brushed my hair and wiped off the old runny makeup, and put on some fresh eyeliner and mascara so that I didn’t look like I’d been crying so much. No doubt I was going to start blubbering all over again to my Mom, but if she had people then they would probably still be there by the time I got there, so I didn’t want to go over there looking like shit.
@Tones27tga
Life in technicolour :)
5/27/14