Nerds Do It Better
The Fall
It was chilly that night in late November. Ears still rang from the loud bass that had coursed through the arena only hours ago. Metal pressed against their stomachs as they stood there watching and waiting. Waiting for those of who they all but worshiped to appear.
Just then as if someone had answered their prayers loud boisterous laughter was heard moving closer and closer. Like a beacon of hope five sweaty, tatted men strolled around the closest chariot. As if on cue loud, shrill screams of joy and abandon ripped through the air. Gloved hands covered cold ears as worshipers pushed, shoved, and pulled all in attempts to get closer to their idols. From behind the monsters shoved at her back as hard as they could in attempts to move her. Their attempts worked as the young damsel found herself shoved over the railing and to the cement.
As she laid there sputtering for air the sound of shrieking harpies died down. Heavy footsteps rushed to her side. Even with eyes closed as she tried to capture her breath the damsel could feel the warmth of a body as it knelt next to her. Strong, muscled arms helped the young woman into a sitting position rubbing circles on her in attempts to soothe her raspy breaths.
She tried in vain to push the person away, but they wouldn't have it. Other voices berated the throng of rambunctious women for being so rowdy only to tell them to leave. A chorus of 'awes' went out among the crowd before bodies turned and walked away, tails between their legs and ears down.
When she thought all was silent a familiar voice began speaking. It sounded like her best friend attempting to reach her. Without opening her eyes the girl spoke up.
"It's alright. She's my friend." It took an effort to get that out before she was sent into a coughing fit. There were now two different hands on her back as a male and female's voices both spoke softly to her.
Sucking air in once again she was finally able to breathe properly. Cracking her eyes she saw that the men those girls had waited for were standing around her, along with her best friend. Looking to her side she met with a dimpled smile and green eyes.
"You alright there?" His voice was deep as he spoke to her. In response all she could do was nod.
"I'm so sorry Liv! I shouldn't have brought you here!" Two more feminine arms encircled her body before pulling away only to have hands pressed to her cheeks as questions flew at light speed.
Pushing the anxious female's hands away the one known as Liv spoke up. "I'm fine Be. Just had the wind knocked out of me for a second there."
"Well that's good," Be turned to the dimpled man adding, "and thank you so much for helping Liv. If I had known those fans were gonna be so aggressive I wouldn't have brought her."
"It's all good. Something like this has never really happened after a show, but I'm glad I could be of service." Just then a shorter man with disheveled blonde hair tapped on his shoulder. "What's up man?"
"Come here for a sec. The guys and I want to talk to you about something," he said pointing towards the other three men.
"Alright," turning back to Liv and Be he added, "I'll be right back." With that said he stood up and strolled over to the other men.
Be helped Liv up off the ground into a standing position. Reaching towards the stars Liv stretched her aching arms and legs. As she did this both her jacket and shirt road up her belly just a little to show a sliver of a tattoo. Sea green eyes bore into her from a short distance, but she didn't notice them.
Crossing her arms over her chest she looked over to see the dimpled man from before, as well as the others, walk over to them. Green eyes acted as the ambassador since he was the only one who had spoken to them.
"The guys and I have made an agreement. We're very sorry about what happened and we want to make it up to," pausing he glanced at the shorter one who motioned for him to continue, "So, we thought we'd repay you two by taking you out for dinner. How does that sound?"
Liv glanced at Be who was grinning from ear to ear. "That sounds great. The only place that's open this late though is a 24 hour dinner fifteen minutes from here."
"Cool, sounds good to me. By the way I'm Matt, the short one's Johnny, fedora is Brian, other shorty isAiren, and snake bites over there is Zacky," the one named Matt said holding out his hand to Be.
"It's nice to meet all of you. I'm Bianca, and this Olivia," Be said returning the hand shake.
"The pleasure is all mine," said Johnny taking Bianca's hand and kissing the top of it with a wink. As she giggled and twirled her hair with the free hand Olivia rolled her eyes. All the while those same eyes kept glancing at her, never quite staring, but taking quick glances as if he was afraid of getting caught. In the back of her mind Olivia though, this will be a long night.
Just then as if someone had answered their prayers loud boisterous laughter was heard moving closer and closer. Like a beacon of hope five sweaty, tatted men strolled around the closest chariot. As if on cue loud, shrill screams of joy and abandon ripped through the air. Gloved hands covered cold ears as worshipers pushed, shoved, and pulled all in attempts to get closer to their idols. From behind the monsters shoved at her back as hard as they could in attempts to move her. Their attempts worked as the young damsel found herself shoved over the railing and to the cement.
As she laid there sputtering for air the sound of shrieking harpies died down. Heavy footsteps rushed to her side. Even with eyes closed as she tried to capture her breath the damsel could feel the warmth of a body as it knelt next to her. Strong, muscled arms helped the young woman into a sitting position rubbing circles on her in attempts to soothe her raspy breaths.
She tried in vain to push the person away, but they wouldn't have it. Other voices berated the throng of rambunctious women for being so rowdy only to tell them to leave. A chorus of 'awes' went out among the crowd before bodies turned and walked away, tails between their legs and ears down.
When she thought all was silent a familiar voice began speaking. It sounded like her best friend attempting to reach her. Without opening her eyes the girl spoke up.
"It's alright. She's my friend." It took an effort to get that out before she was sent into a coughing fit. There were now two different hands on her back as a male and female's voices both spoke softly to her.
Sucking air in once again she was finally able to breathe properly. Cracking her eyes she saw that the men those girls had waited for were standing around her, along with her best friend. Looking to her side she met with a dimpled smile and green eyes.
"You alright there?" His voice was deep as he spoke to her. In response all she could do was nod.
"I'm so sorry Liv! I shouldn't have brought you here!" Two more feminine arms encircled her body before pulling away only to have hands pressed to her cheeks as questions flew at light speed.
Pushing the anxious female's hands away the one known as Liv spoke up. "I'm fine Be. Just had the wind knocked out of me for a second there."
"Well that's good," Be turned to the dimpled man adding, "and thank you so much for helping Liv. If I had known those fans were gonna be so aggressive I wouldn't have brought her."
"It's all good. Something like this has never really happened after a show, but I'm glad I could be of service." Just then a shorter man with disheveled blonde hair tapped on his shoulder. "What's up man?"
"Come here for a sec. The guys and I want to talk to you about something," he said pointing towards the other three men.
"Alright," turning back to Liv and Be he added, "I'll be right back." With that said he stood up and strolled over to the other men.
Be helped Liv up off the ground into a standing position. Reaching towards the stars Liv stretched her aching arms and legs. As she did this both her jacket and shirt road up her belly just a little to show a sliver of a tattoo. Sea green eyes bore into her from a short distance, but she didn't notice them.
Crossing her arms over her chest she looked over to see the dimpled man from before, as well as the others, walk over to them. Green eyes acted as the ambassador since he was the only one who had spoken to them.
"The guys and I have made an agreement. We're very sorry about what happened and we want to make it up to," pausing he glanced at the shorter one who motioned for him to continue, "So, we thought we'd repay you two by taking you out for dinner. How does that sound?"
Liv glanced at Be who was grinning from ear to ear. "That sounds great. The only place that's open this late though is a 24 hour dinner fifteen minutes from here."
"Cool, sounds good to me. By the way I'm Matt, the short one's Johnny, fedora is Brian, other shorty isAiren, and snake bites over there is Zacky," the one named Matt said holding out his hand to Be.
"It's nice to meet all of you. I'm Bianca, and this Olivia," Be said returning the hand shake.
"The pleasure is all mine," said Johnny taking Bianca's hand and kissing the top of it with a wink. As she giggled and twirled her hair with the free hand Olivia rolled her eyes. All the while those same eyes kept glancing at her, never quite staring, but taking quick glances as if he was afraid of getting caught. In the back of her mind Olivia though, this will be a long night.
Title and Summary
I'm not the type of person who wants a lot out of a summary, so yours is perfect; concise and to the point, not giving too much away. Rhetorical questions tend to go down well with readers.
Spelling and Grammar
Not a mistake/typo in sight. Well done.
General Plotline
This chapter wasn't generally plot-heavy; more of an introduction to Olivia's character. I can't wait to see how you develop the relationship between Olivia and Zacky. There isn't much to say besides the writing was very emotive and I'm curious as to what will unravel in the coming chapters :)
10/27/12