The God That Never Came
Welcome Back
My alarm blared and it woke me up out of the peace filled sleep. I sat up and turned off the alarm before getting out of bed and entering my bathroom. I splashed some water on my face and it woke me up completely. I walked out of the bathroom and grabbed some clothes and put them on carefully. I looked at myself in the mirror and seen the huge stitched up wound that laid there on my face. Even in a different state they still want to harm me. I went over to the bed and sat down and put my back pack on before hauling myself out of my room and into the kitchen on my crutches. I fixed me some cereal and ate in the silence of the room. I liked the quiet that radiated throughout the house in the mornings. I finished my breakfast and grabbed my crutches from beside me and walked to the door. I got outside and seen Matt standing at his car.
"Good morning." I said smiling. He looked over at me and came over to my side.
"Good morning to you too. How did you sleep?"
"Just fine until my alarm ruined it." I said as Matt helped me over to his car. He took my back pack from me and helped me sit down in the front seat of his car. I placed the crutches between my legs and he put my bag in the back. He got in and started the car.
"I know the feeling." he pulled out of Sabrina's driveway and went the short distance to the school. Matt parked the car in teacher's parking and helped me get out and he carried my bag for me. He's such a sweetheart. We walked into the building and right to the empty classroom. He pulled out a chair for me at his desk and I sat down.
"So how much stuff did you excuse me from?" I asked as he sat my bag down at my desk.
"Everything up to next week. You can still do it if you like but it won't be counted against you."
"Thanks. What's on today's agenda?" I asked smiling.
"I was thinking about a project."
"What kind of project?" I asked cracking my knuckles.
"I really haven't decided. I was thinking of either having the class write their own songs and put them into an album or find a song that reflect their life and performing it."
"Why not both." I suggested.
"What do you mean?"
"Combine the 2. Have the class write an album and perform 3 songs of their choice from the album." I explained.
"That's not a bad idea." Matt got up from his seat at his desk and started writing about the project on the board.
PROJECT! ANNOUNCEMENT TODAY
The bell sounded and I crutched my ass over to my seat and sat down as the other students piled into the room and began to talk with each other. Matt sat at his seat doing something as the tardy bell sounded and then everyone became extremely quiet. Matt got up from his desk once again and stood in front of the class.
"Alright class, today we'll be starting a project. The project will consist of 16 songs 3 of which, at your choice, will be performed in front of the class. This album will need cover art and 4 pages of art in it. I don't care if you're a good drawer or not. All I count on is that you all do your best." Matt explained and one of the preppy girls raised her hand.
"Does this album thingy have to be rock or anything we want it?"
"Anything you want." Matt said and she high fived one of the other girls. I couldn't help but roll my eyes.
"Before I let you all get started on this, I would like to welcome Octayne back to class after that horrific car accident she had."
"I heard it was no accident. I heard she ran off the road trying to kill herself." the blonde said.
"Excuse me but I'm the one who found her car over the embankment and it was a accident." Matt glared at the blonde and she quickly looked away and closed her snotty mouth. I couldn't help but silently laugh.
"Now this project will be due 2 weeks before graduation. I suggest you work hard on it. The harder you work, the better a grade." he said before going back and sitting down in his chair and working on something of his own. I pulled out a peice of paper and started thinking about some of the lyrics I could put on paper but I was drawing an absolute blank.
What if I can't do this? I sighed lowly and started to doodle on my paper. Maybe that will help me to somewhat think about what I can write about. This is harder than I thought it would be. The lunch bell rang and sudents left the room and I got up and went over to Matt's desk and sitting down.
"Babe is something wrong?"
"No...just trying to think of something to write a song about." I said sitting back in the chair.
"You'll figure it out and besides you'll have me to help you."
"Thanks." I said smiling. He got up and shut the door and sat back down in his chair.
"You're so beautiful."
"I don't see how." I said lowering my head.
"What?"
"I'm broken and scarred. How can I be what you say I am?" I stated.
"You're still beautiful." he leaned over and kissed me gently and sweeter than ever before.
"I love you."
"I love you too." I said smiling. He looked down at his watch.
"Can you play for me?" he asked looking over at the piano.
"Sure what do you want to hear?"
"Anything you want to play." he said smiling. He helped me up and over to the piano and I popped my fingers one last time before gliding my fingers over the keys and letting out the most beautiful sound.
I'm so tired of being here, suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave
Your presence still lingers here and it won't leave me alone
These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
You used to captivate me by your resonating light
Now, I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me
These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me, I've been alone all along
When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me, me, me
I ended the beautiful song and placed my hands in my lap.
"That was beautiful. Did your mother write it?"
"Actually I did." I said looking up at him.
"For your mom and dad?" I nodded and stood to my feet with the help of my crutches.
"Let's get you back to your seat. It's almost time for everyone to return to class." I nodded and he walked with me to my seat and I sat down.
"You'll be able to figure out songs. You've done it before." he said as the bell rang and went back to his desk. The bell rang minutes later and everyone piled back into the room and continued to work on the project. The words Matt said to me echoed through my thoughts. He's right. I will figure this out. I've wrote songs before for my mom and dad. I can do this.
"Good morning." I said smiling. He looked over at me and came over to my side.
"Good morning to you too. How did you sleep?"
"Just fine until my alarm ruined it." I said as Matt helped me over to his car. He took my back pack from me and helped me sit down in the front seat of his car. I placed the crutches between my legs and he put my bag in the back. He got in and started the car.
"I know the feeling." he pulled out of Sabrina's driveway and went the short distance to the school. Matt parked the car in teacher's parking and helped me get out and he carried my bag for me. He's such a sweetheart. We walked into the building and right to the empty classroom. He pulled out a chair for me at his desk and I sat down.
"So how much stuff did you excuse me from?" I asked as he sat my bag down at my desk.
"Everything up to next week. You can still do it if you like but it won't be counted against you."
"Thanks. What's on today's agenda?" I asked smiling.
"I was thinking about a project."
"What kind of project?" I asked cracking my knuckles.
"I really haven't decided. I was thinking of either having the class write their own songs and put them into an album or find a song that reflect their life and performing it."
"Why not both." I suggested.
"What do you mean?"
"Combine the 2. Have the class write an album and perform 3 songs of their choice from the album." I explained.
"That's not a bad idea." Matt got up from his seat at his desk and started writing about the project on the board.
PROJECT! ANNOUNCEMENT TODAY
The bell sounded and I crutched my ass over to my seat and sat down as the other students piled into the room and began to talk with each other. Matt sat at his seat doing something as the tardy bell sounded and then everyone became extremely quiet. Matt got up from his desk once again and stood in front of the class.
"Alright class, today we'll be starting a project. The project will consist of 16 songs 3 of which, at your choice, will be performed in front of the class. This album will need cover art and 4 pages of art in it. I don't care if you're a good drawer or not. All I count on is that you all do your best." Matt explained and one of the preppy girls raised her hand.
"Does this album thingy have to be rock or anything we want it?"
"Anything you want." Matt said and she high fived one of the other girls. I couldn't help but roll my eyes.
"Before I let you all get started on this, I would like to welcome Octayne back to class after that horrific car accident she had."
"I heard it was no accident. I heard she ran off the road trying to kill herself." the blonde said.
"Excuse me but I'm the one who found her car over the embankment and it was a accident." Matt glared at the blonde and she quickly looked away and closed her snotty mouth. I couldn't help but silently laugh.
"Now this project will be due 2 weeks before graduation. I suggest you work hard on it. The harder you work, the better a grade." he said before going back and sitting down in his chair and working on something of his own. I pulled out a peice of paper and started thinking about some of the lyrics I could put on paper but I was drawing an absolute blank.
What if I can't do this? I sighed lowly and started to doodle on my paper. Maybe that will help me to somewhat think about what I can write about. This is harder than I thought it would be. The lunch bell rang and sudents left the room and I got up and went over to Matt's desk and sitting down.
"Babe is something wrong?"
"No...just trying to think of something to write a song about." I said sitting back in the chair.
"You'll figure it out and besides you'll have me to help you."
"Thanks." I said smiling. He got up and shut the door and sat back down in his chair.
"You're so beautiful."
"I don't see how." I said lowering my head.
"What?"
"I'm broken and scarred. How can I be what you say I am?" I stated.
"You're still beautiful." he leaned over and kissed me gently and sweeter than ever before.
"I love you."
"I love you too." I said smiling. He looked down at his watch.
"Can you play for me?" he asked looking over at the piano.
"Sure what do you want to hear?"
"Anything you want to play." he said smiling. He helped me up and over to the piano and I popped my fingers one last time before gliding my fingers over the keys and letting out the most beautiful sound.
I'm so tired of being here, suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave
Your presence still lingers here and it won't leave me alone
These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
You used to captivate me by your resonating light
Now, I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me
These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me, I've been alone all along
When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me, me, me
I ended the beautiful song and placed my hands in my lap.
"That was beautiful. Did your mother write it?"
"Actually I did." I said looking up at him.
"For your mom and dad?" I nodded and stood to my feet with the help of my crutches.
"Let's get you back to your seat. It's almost time for everyone to return to class." I nodded and he walked with me to my seat and I sat down.
"You'll be able to figure out songs. You've done it before." he said as the bell rang and went back to his desk. The bell rang minutes later and everyone piled back into the room and continued to work on the project. The words Matt said to me echoed through my thoughts. He's right. I will figure this out. I've wrote songs before for my mom and dad. I can do this.
3/18/13