I woke up and buried my head in the pillow. It was brighter in the living room than in the bedroom. I let out a small whine that turned into a groan.

"What was that," Brian asked, walking over. I pushed my head deeper into the pillow. I felt him stand over me, waiting for an answer. I didn't do anything. He sighed and sat down on the edge of the couch where my hips were and rested his hand on the small of my back. I took in a quick gasp. He lightly grazed his fingertips up and down my spine. "I think we should go back." I shot up and looked at him.

"What," I exclaimed with my eyes wide. He had a completely serious expression on his face.

"We're going back."

"Wh...why?!" He seemed to be thinking about his response and his hand continued to travel along my spine.

"We... this isn't healthy, Courtney. I'm sick, and... you are, too." I stared at him.

"What do you mean." My voice became low and emotionless, so it came out as a statement instead of a question. He briefly bit his lip.

"What I've done to you," he started off slowly, "has really messed with your head. You know it's wrong, but when it happens, your common sense just goes away and you think that what I do is what you want."

"Because it is-" he cut me off.

"No, baby, it's not. It's not right." I looked down.

"There's no point in arguing, is there?" He spread his hand so he was rubbing my back instead of just using his fingertips.

"No. There's not." He squeezed my shoulder before standing. "You can get in the car, I'll be out in a few." I nodded so he walked into the bedroom and I rubbed my eyes. I stood up and walked over to the door, but as soon as I opened it, I heard Brian start talking. I closed it as if I went outside, but crept over to the wall by the archway.

"I think it's time I end this, Matt," he said. "This has gone too far."

"I'm glad you decided that, Bri," Matt said over the speaker.

"Yeah. I think you might be right, too."

"About?" Silence for a couple seconds.

"She needs to see someone." My heart freezes and drops along with my jaw. A therapist?

"I knew I was right... she's gonna need a lot of help through this."

"I know, but I have a feeling I'm gonna be the only one she'll want. When I told her we were coming back, she kept trying to convince me that she wanted to stay with me and she liked what we did. I don't know why she was saying that."

"Considering just the other day she wanted me to come save her." Brian sighed.

"Exactly." There was about ten seconds of silence before anything else was said. "We'll be back sometime today. Be at my house, okay?"

"Yeah, man. See ya."

"Bye." His phone snapped shut and footsteps came toward the opening. Before I knew it, Brian was standing in front of me.

"You heard that," he said, but not as a question.

"I'm not seeing a therapist," I said sternly. I'm not crazy.

"You need to talk to somebody, Courtney-"

"No, I don't, Brian." He rubbed his eyes tiredly. He watched me for a couple seconds before walking toward me, so I backed up against the wall. He put his arms on both sides of me so I was trapped. He stared straight into my eyes.

"How do you feel right now," he whispered. I swallowed back my fear and nervousness. He was pressed against me, so he could feel my heart pounding.

"Fine," I murmured, my voice cracking. He slowly shook his head.

"No you're not. You're scared out of your mind." I didn't do anything until he backed away. "Let's go." I obeyed and walked to the door, not looking back at him as I walked down the path. I got in the SUV and waited for Brian to start the car. He backed out and started driving. I knew a long two and half hours was ahead of me.

***

We didn't talk the entire drive. He glanced at me as I tried falling asleep, which I did eventually. When we got home, all Brian had to do was tap my shoulder twice and I jumped. I stared at him, waiting for the expression of annoyance mixed with pain to fade.

"We're home," he half whispered, half murmured. He got out and walked around to my side, opening the door for me. I stepped out and walked up the path to the house, afraid to see the look on his face. I opened the door and walked in. Matt was here, and he left it open. As soon as I stepped into the living room, Matt ran over to me.

"Courtney, I missed you," he said relievedly, picking me up in a hug. I held onto him as tight as I could, never wanting to let go. He set me down when Brian walked in.

"Nice to see you, Brian," he said, keeping his hand on my shoulder. Brian tried not to look at me.

"Nice to see you, too." He looked around. "Now that we're back, what happens now?" Matt squeezed my shoulder gently. Neither of them said anything So I looked up at Matt, who was giving a a questioning look to Brian. I looked back at my brother and saw him nod once.

"All right," Matt said, looking down at me. "I guess what we can do now is take you to see Dr. Fuller, and-"

"No," I spoke sternly. Matt's hand dropped to the middle of my back and he rubbed it reassuringly like Brian had before.

"I tried talking to her-" Brian was saying before Matt interrupted.

"I'll handle it," Matt said. Brian looked at me for a few seconds before turning and walking back out of the house. Matt softly pushed me toward the couch. "We need to talk." I cautiously walked over with him behind me, and sat down next to him after he relaxed against the back cushion. He set his arm behind me on the top of the back of the sofa. "You need to talk to someone, Courtney."

"No, I don't-"

"Yes. You do." I sighed and ran my hands through my hair. After not looking up for a few seconds, Matt tilted my head up with his index finger. "You trust me, don't you?" I nodded slowly. "So you know I want what's best for you?"

"I can't talk to someone about it, Matt-"

"Why not, Courtney," he whispered almost demandingly. My heart got caught in my throat and I instinctively moved so I was facing his side with my legs pulled up to my chest and wrapped my arms around my knees. He looked across the room, thinking of what to say. "Tell me why you can't talk to somebody about what he did to you."

"He'll get in trouble," I said, barely audible. "He'll go to jail."

"He can. You're right. Only if this gets out to anyone."

"What do you mean?" He turned so his torso was facing me.

"I talked to Dr. Fuller. She knows the situation. She says she thinks she can help you-"

"By doing what? Making me talk about the very memories I've tried escaping from? Hell no. I'm not putting myself through that-"

"I'll be there," he whispered caringly, "if you want me to be." I looked down and rubbed my eyes, sighing. "Are you tired?" I nodded. He took my hand and I looked at him. "Trust me, all right?" He pulled me off the couch and led me to my room. He moved the covers back. "Go to sleep." I lied down, but I stared at him. He squinted his eyes slightly. "Do you want me to stay?" I nodded before realizing what I was doing, but I didn't take it back. He climbed in on the other side and I turned over so I was facing him. He slid his arms around my waist and I rested my head in the crook between his chest and the pillow. I fell asleep instantly.

***

"Courtney, wake up," Matt murmured, shaking me slightly. I gasped quickly, jumped, and looked at him all at the same time. His hand came up to my face and I winced, but he just moved my hair out of my face. He glanced down, but met my eyes only a second later with a seriously concerned expression. "Let go." I felt my hand clenched so I looked at it. I was holding onto Matt's T-shirt. I released it and kept my hand back against my shoulder. His hand moved more of hair out of my face, but he followed it until his hand was resting on my back. "Are you okay?" I shook my head. He leaned forward and pressed a kiss to my forehead, rubbing my back again. When he pulled away, he sighed shakily.

"What's wrong," I asked automatically. Something wasn't right. He gazed at me for a couple seconds before answering.

"How much... do you want to leave," he asked quietly. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion.

"Leave where?" He swallowed back any fear he had of my response.

"Life." That took me by surprise.

"I... why are you asking," I asked almost breathlessly. What brought this up?

"In your sleep," he started, "you whispered, 'kill me'." I didn't know what to say. He figured that out about ten seconds later. "We all need a reason, a reason just to stay. Let me be that reason." I looked away, but he put his hand on my cheek so I was looking right at him. "I'd give anything for you, Courtney-"

"Even your life," I asked with a little doubt hidden in my tone.

"I'd rather trade it all while somehow saving you," he murmured.

What was I supposed to say to that?